What is happening to my 19 week old?

(30 Posts)
cupcake78 Sun 10-Nov-13 06:21:38

She's gone from a happy content baby who practically slept through to a clingy, sleepless, fussy thing. Only I will do.

She's almost as bad as when I first brought her home!

She will not settle, wakes up every hour. I've given up and she's in with me now.

It's been getting worse since 16 weeks. I want my sleeping baby back. What do I do to get her to sleep?

Nodney Sun 10-Nov-13 06:23:15

I feel your pain cupcake. Exactly the same here with DS 21wks! Nothing I try works except holding him

cupcake78 Sun 10-Nov-13 06:45:36

I'm so tired! The only thing that works is calpol or neurofen to get her to rest but then were off again hmm

4 month sleep regression. It sucks. Just ride it out and hopefully you'll see an improvement in 2 weeks or so.

MinesAPintOfTea Sun 10-Nov-13 07:03:56

4 month sleep regression I'm afraid. There's litres of exciting developmental stuff going on so sleep gets worse for a few Weeks. This too will pass

Cinnamon2013 Sun 10-Nov-13 07:03:57

Hi cupcake78, I hear you... You have my sympathy, going through this with my baby son now. He's 18 weeks and was a good sleeper until 15. This article really helped me stay sane: http://sarahockwell-smith.com/2013/08/29/help-my-4-5-month-old-is-sleeping-like-a-newborn-again-aka-as-the-4-5-month-old-babies-from-hell/ Hope it helps and wish you better nights soon x

Cinnamon2013 Sun 10-Nov-13 07:35:12
cupcake78 Sun 10-Nov-13 08:06:18

That article is brilliant! Is she me? So its nothing I've done and it's not something that sticks forever. Take each day and night as it comes again I suppose is the best way forward. If I was going to write a baby book I would call it 'Whatever gets you through the day (and night)'. I'm not btw because I loath them grin

Easy to say and do when your not desperate to sleep. My arms are going to drop off with all the rocking shock. Off to dig out the ring sling.

Sadly dh has chosen now to mentally implode as he's exhausted and needs some personal space. The bloody irony of this makes me want to hit him with a wet mop!

Thankfully dd is so cute it eases the pain. I can say that now the suns up!

lbandrb Sun 10-Nov-13 18:06:51

Cupcake78, I totally feel your pain and thanks for responding to my own thread on the 4-month sleep regression! Let's keep posting if we can for a bit of moral support. I keep being told to leave DS to cry it out by most people I turn to for a second opinion - not an option for me for several reasons I won't elaborate on here.

I think this regression is supposed to last a few weeks so we just need to do what we can to get through it and then tackle better going-to-sleep behaviours, if they don't easily return naturally, so we're hopefully OK for the next regression or for relapses due to teething etc.

That article is good! Encouraging she talks about it as a 4-5 month regression. I reckon I'm 2 weeks in, so I'm hoping against hope it's just another 2 weeks.

cupcake78 Sun 10-Nov-13 18:36:14

Well we're 3 weeks in and sorry to say but sleep wise it's getting worse every few days! Her mood is better as she learns more and more. What is lovely is dd can now roll over and back again. She's far more excited and happy when awake including during the night. She's found her feet and is currently sat on my knee blowing rasberrys at her big brother for the first time grin

Its hilarious grin she's also giggling at herself.

Sod those who say let her cry! I'm not doing that when its obvious she's unsettled with everything. Like I said in going to regress with her and do the newborn baby thing of whatever gets you through the day grin

lbandrb Sun 10-Nov-13 18:45:20

You're a week ahead of me so hopefully you'll be out of this in 1-2 weeks! DS is clearly learning new skills too. I had read the 12-week growth spurt was the last big one. Rubbish! Though DS's sleep did regress in exactly the same way and I think it lasted around a month then. Nice to have someone else saying sod the 'cry it out' idea. The next person who tells me to do that might get a slap. Or I'll get DS to yank their hair hard (instead of mine). And if anyone dares ask me if he's sleeping through the night... GRRR

Cinnamon2013 Sun 10-Nov-13 19:18:12

Hi cupcake78 and lbamdrb - glad article was helpful and nice to know we are going through it together (even though wouldn't wish it on anyone!) My boy also starting to roll and find feet and is v excited about it - really no wonder they are a bit wired/haywire at night. My OH also struggling a bit as I've been leaving the rocking to him at night (feeding taking up time and also the bub is getting too heavy for me). Anything that gets you through it is the policy here! Good luck and let's stay in touch on this x

lbandrb Sun 10-Nov-13 19:45:43

Good luck for tonight Cinnamon and Cupcake! [Good name combo]. Thought I might be onto a dummy-free bedtime tonight as I got DS almost asleep without it, with a slight variation to my routine, and he then stayed calm when he went into the cot for the first time in over a week. However, the tired crying started and then got more intense, and I couldn't soothe effectively minus dummy so gave in. Then drifted off to sleep happily on his own... Will persevere as hopefully in spite of the regression maybe one night he'll manage to go dummy-less and that might make for better sleep; in theory it should help a bit. I live in hope!

cupcake78 Sun 10-Nov-13 19:59:29

Yes indeed good luck!

I'm snuggled in the sofa with dd who's flat out floppy baby sleeping but we all know if I move what will happen. I actually daren't move to even test it!

Feeling sick and very yucky! seriously hope its just tiredness and not a bug.

lbandrb Sun 10-Nov-13 20:09:38

Oh, Cupcake... I know the feeling! I've had a cold this week and DH has had some sort of bug. With the lack of sleep we're so vulnerable to catching something, which makes things much harder. Hopefully it's just extreme tiredness - probably is!

ElleBellyBeeblebrox Sun 10-Nov-13 20:29:23

Can I jump in here... DS is 26 weeks and still having a nightmare with sleep. He was almost managing 6-7 hour stretches pretty consistently up til a few months ago, then it all went down the shitter! (He did have a spell in hospital at 14 weeks and after that his sleep first started to slide so kind of forgave him for that). He's now up every hour and a half/two hours, and just wants to feed constantly. HV told me he doesn't need feeding at night and to leave him to make a fuss. ( She thinks I'm soft and I probably am, but I refuse to do CIO as she suggests.) I just feel completely in despair, it's been weeks now and I just want some sleep! I was going to bed early to get a few hours in but he tends to be up before ten now. I had hoped this blip would even itself out again but no sign at the moment...any tips gratefully recieved! Good luck tonight all.

cupcake78 Mon 11-Nov-13 06:53:26

So ladies how has your night been?

Mine has been middle but significantly better than Saturday. Dd finally was put in her cot at 10.30pm wasn't happy so gave her milk. She settled to sleep on her own grin (while I sat nervously on the edge of the bed). She woke at 2am took a full bottle again settled on her own grin, then again at 4am, dummy in, 6am dummy in. I can hear squeaks so it won't be long before she's awake.

I still feel sick but I'm sure it's just tiredness.

Cinnamon2013 Mon 11-Nov-13 07:42:23

Morning. Good that there was some improvement from Sat, cupcake, and that she settled herself in the end. We had a busy night but a good final waking (6.30, not 4.30!) A friend advised me to keep everything in pitch black and keep him in the same room as much as possible, shushing and patting him to sleep when we could. The shushing worked a couple of times and was good, but others he seemed genuinely v hungry so I fed him. Big hiccup in our plan was a poo at 3am ( why are the night poos back?!) so had to take him out if room, light, etc resulting in wide awake bubba. Was good to feel like we were following a plan though even if it didn't go brilliantly. Poor OH ended up on the sofa in our freezing living room! X

Cinnamon2013 Mon 11-Nov-13 07:43:48

Ps hope the tired sick feeling gets better, ugh that is the worst...

cupcake78 Mon 11-Nov-13 08:12:20

Agree with the dark and no interaction or eye contact. Make a fuss of morning time. Lights, noise, chat and play smile.

You seem to have had a better night as well.

lbandrb Mon 11-Nov-13 09:23:34

Hi Cinnamon and Cupcake. Hope you both managed to get better sleep and weren't awake listening for the next peep as I often am! Though am getting better at not doing that. Last night a mixed bag. A 12-hour block almost to the minute, which helps with maintaining a routine, and in the middle of this 3 x 3-hour blocks. But... woke after an initial 40 mins (often wakes after the first little bit of sleep) when the boiler made a gentle noise and kept almost going to sleep then failing to do so, or going to sleep just for a couple of minutes, until an hour had passed. Then after his first night feed he screamed (so rare for him) when I put him down. Inconsolable. Nothing would work. After about 20 minutes it passed and he went to sleep quite calmly. V restless at 6am and dummy constantly falling out, so had to bring him into bed with me to get him back off.

Some not great elements, but the 3 x 3-hour blocks is definitely an improvement on waking every 1-1.5 hours so I feel more rested. Though there were points in the night when it was so hard to get him back to sleep I did despair.

Every night is a new adventure!

lbandrb Mon 11-Nov-13 09:24:42

ElleBellyBeeblebrox, my friend is having quick success with Pantley's gentle removal technique, from her No-Cry Sleep Solution book.

ElleBellyBeeblebrox Mon 11-Nov-13 10:00:49

Thankyou, will have a look online today!

Cinnamon2013 Tue 12-Nov-13 06:41:19

Morning. How was it? Had fun making a big thing of morning today - lights, song, smiles - cheered me up at any rate! Especially when it's still dark outside. Our night was better, three feeds but final wake at 630 again. It's just the poos/nappy changes that are throwing things a bit.

cupcake78 Tue 12-Nov-13 08:04:49

We have break through gringringringrin

Dd slept all night from 10 till 5.45 grin

She was very difficult to get to sleep and dh took over as I was so exhausted. He sat in her pitch black bedroom with her for an hour and she finally fell asleep. Don't want to brag but I've had 7 hours straight sleep and I feel like a new woman.

I seriously hope this is her coming out the other side.

There may be hope that it will end wink

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