Please help - 3 Month Old only sleeps in arms

(28 Posts)
MrsLovebucket Wed 16-Oct-13 18:18:55

Please can someone advise us on the best course of action as we are at wits end.

DS is just over 3 months old and sleeps great at night. We put him down (already asleep) in the bedside crib and he sleeps through until 5:30/6:00am.

The problem is during the day where he will only sleep if he is being held. I've tried lying him in the carrycot/cot when he's tired but he won't go over asleep. I've tried getting him to sleep in my arms then putting him down - he wakes as soon as he is laid down.

I know there are people who will come along saying to just enjoy it, and I have for the last three months, but I can't get anything done at all during the day as I have a baby stuck to me. Slings don't work, he won't sleep in them at all.

I attempted the pick up/ put down yesterday but after two hours of us both in tears I had to give up. Felt like I'd failed him sad

Please help with any advice you have. Actually, what I really want is someone to come round and sort it out in an afternoon - I can pay in MN gin! wine

CityDweller Wed 16-Oct-13 20:42:27

My DD was like this. I too was over it by 3 months - although mine would sleep in sling at least. How about the buggy? We transitioned from in-arms naps to cot naps via the buggy. She always hated the pram (carrycot set-up), so I switched to buggy set-up with cosy fleece liner thingy at 3.5 months. She loved it and soon started napping in that. I think that got her used to sleeping during the day not on a warm body. Soon after that I started working on putting her in cot for her morning nap, which she took to pretty well, but still requires rocking first.

I think my DD was ready for these changes, and it may just be that yours isn't there yet...

CityDweller Wed 16-Oct-13 20:44:37

Oh - and a pre-nap routine (zip into sleeping bag, close blinds, turn on white noise, a little song) seemed to help.

MrsLovebucket Wed 16-Oct-13 21:19:09

Thanks! It's good to know it's not just us.

He will happily sleep in the car seat in the car and in the pram but as soon as we bring him into the house his eyes ping open and he's wide awake. It's his special power!

DH and I haven't had a meal together since he was born. Just want to enjoy him and not get annoyed when he won't sleep out of our arms. He's such a great baby apart from this.

FaithTheVampireSlayer Thu 17-Oct-13 22:22:19

Ah yes we has this! I got things done by getting a stretchy sling. Pop her in, she would enjoy the closeness and the view of the world from there, most of the time she snuggled in a slept. I have even been known to pee with her in there! DD also woke the second we got home from anywhere. My solution has been to take a hot drink in a thermos and go for a drive, park up and read my kindle.
We also got a swinging chair. I'd warm a Muslin and then put her down and most of the time she'd stay asleep (past tense because she's 6 months now and the chair has lost its magic!).

FaithTheVampireSlayer Thu 17-Oct-13 22:23:58

Oh it's worth reading The No-Cry Sleep Solution. I've found it helpful in improving the ability to put DD down. No a quick fix but gentle.

MrsLovebucket Fri 18-Oct-13 07:57:40

Thanks Faith. He's not a fan of the sling too much.

Have been taking him out in the pram/car but would love some quick and easy way to get him to sleep unaided. Lol

Can I also take back the comment about him being great at night. Last few nights he's been waking up at 3:30am - sad

minipie Fri 18-Oct-13 14:02:19

moving pram or in arms was all that worked for DD at that age (sorry)

gradually she stopped waking when I brought her into the house, so I could leave her in the hall once asleep

then I was able to get her to sleep by just rocking her in the pushchair (and rocking again when she woke after only 30 mins)

gradually we moved her bedtime earlier so we got evenings back (though I paid for this as she was then unsettled the other end of the night, after 3am)

it's a gradual process I'm afraid... but it will happen.

MrsLovebucket Fri 18-Oct-13 20:52:18

Thanks Minipie, I'm beginning to fear there is no quick fix. Don't suppose you're free for pram pushing, say once or twice a day? wink

minipie Fri 18-Oct-13 21:37:38

ha! nope sorry done my stint of that... mostly in the snow in January! I did think at the time if only there was a pram pushing service, bit like dog walking smile

yellowsnownoteatwillyou Fri 18-Oct-13 21:51:16

Have you tried him in a bean bag? My Ds will sleep or sit happily in his bean bag has done since he came home from hospital. Thou round about 2 in the afternoon does prefer a people to sleep on, sometimes I let him because he is so snuggly. But would be hard if he was like that all the time, I had a soft crocheted blanket on it at first and now a cellular blanket as he was getting too hot. Might be worth a go, very cheap in Argos.

MrsLovebucket Sat 19-Oct-13 11:48:40

Mmm a beanbag? Never thought of one of those. At this point I'll try anything. Thanks yellow, off to check them out.

minipie Sat 19-Oct-13 14:11:05

that reminds me - I had decided that if my next child is like dd I will splash out on a Cocoonababy - supposed to mimic the foetal sleeping position, gets amazing reviews. Worth a look OP but it is ££££

yellowsnownoteatwillyou Sat 19-Oct-13 14:36:36

I honestly don't know what I would do without one, so hope it works.
Mine is now on its side as Ds is huge, and likes to have his feet nestled in it so not hanging off the edge.
Im not sure what I will do when he's a bit bigger,for naps during the day. confused

minipie Sat 19-Oct-13 14:57:44

yellowsnow is it a special bean bag for babies, or just a normal bean bag?

yellowsnownoteatwillyou Sat 19-Oct-13 18:14:42

Just a normal bean bag, it's out of Argos £30. Best thing I have bought apart from sockons.

MrsLovebucket Sat 19-Oct-13 19:34:16

Wow that cocoonababy is most definitely £££! Lol

I'd pay anything if it worked but it looks like it's more geared towards newborns whereas DS has had 3 months of practice sleeping while being held.

Going to head to Argos tomorrow and pick up a bean bag - it won't go to waste if he's a fussy bugger and won't take to it anyway.

yellowsnownoteatwillyou Sat 26-Oct-13 11:52:29

How you getting on now?

stargirl1701 Sat 26-Oct-13 11:54:40

Have you tried lots of different types of sling?

MrsSickBucket Sat 26-Oct-13 15:40:23

Thanks for the check up. Bean bag delivery was delayed due to some stock problem but should be here next week. Looking forward to everything being transformed after that! Keeping fingers crossed.

yellowsnownoteatwillyou Sat 26-Oct-13 18:34:36

Oh that's annoying, I hope it comes soon. I have a sad teething baby today, who's been napping in his bean bag a lot today. Couldn't have coped if I he had to sleep on me.
Was thinking to help settle him maybe you could warm it up a bit with a hot water bottle or put a top you have been wearing on it. Who knows babies are trickywink

MrsSickBucket Sat 26-Oct-13 18:44:55

MIL was suggesting the hot water bottle trick just yesterday. I'm definitely up for giving anything a go. Think it'll be good for him as well as my arms!

Hope the teething isn't too bad. You should try something frozen in one of the Nuby The Nibbler - my friend swore by it for her DS

yellowsnownoteatwillyou Sat 26-Oct-13 19:30:27

We are currently using cold nuby teething rings before feeding and Ashton parsons powder morning and night. He's also had calpol. He's not a happy baby when it wears off. I really don't like giving him it,but he was really crying. He's not really a baby who cries a lot ( yes I know I'm very lucky) so knew it must be bad.

MrsSickBucket Sat 26-Oct-13 21:16:06

Poor wee thing. Hope it all settles quickly for him. It's horrible seeing them uncomfortable.

yellowsnownoteatwillyou Sat 26-Oct-13 21:47:46

Thanks, he's settled in bed sleeping now. We will see how long he lasts. The upsetting thing is he is screaming blue murder when dh tries to do anything with him and cries and says mmm mum. So dh now thinks he hates him.

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