18mo - cry it out?

[Hadagutsful]

I do not know what to do with DS2. He's always been very much about me during the day and at night. I have always BF him to sleep, but it's not working as much anymore. He gets down from the bed (we cosleep) and tries to go back downstairs. He will not be rocked or sung to.

Currently we're in the situation where he's staying up way too late (he's still up now) and then he crashes out on a BF. He's not getting up too late (usually around 7am) and he's not napping too much during the day (usually an hour and a quarter, early afternoon or late morning if he's had a disturbed night). His bedtime isn't too early (7:30pm or thereabouts).

I am seriously starting to consider putting him in a cot and letting him cry it out. What would you do?

(I think I've given all the relevant information, but please ask if I've left anything glaringly obvious out. Please no counter-productive "rod for your own back" comments. Thanks in advance!)

[Thurlow]

I'm no expert, but I would imagine that pushing both the cot, if he co-sleeps, and CIO might be too much in one go.

Do you have a standard bedtime routine with a bath, story etc, so that he knows bedtime is coming?

How about gradual withdrawal sleep training?

[KatAndKit]

Can you lie down in the bed with him as he goes to sleep. If he gets up you just put him back in the bed and then pretend to be asleep yourself. If he thinks you have gone to bed too then there is nothing for him to go downstairs for. Obviously you can get up once he is snoring.

I used to bf my ds to sleep (he sleeps in his cot) and put him down asleep. But have now done the second day in a row of lie on the floor next to the cot and offer reassurance. Tonight it took 15 minutes less than it did last night so am getting there.

[Hadagutsful]

Thanks both. Yes we have a bedtime routine, he knows exactly when it's bedtime, he's just choosing to ignore it. He's very big for his age and a strong little blighter too so I struggle physically with picking him up and lying him back down and pretending to be asleep.

I guess maybe gradual would be best. How would that go? BF in my bed then put him into cot and keep lying him down till he gets it? I anticipate lots of angry screaming... (from him, that is!)

[KatAndKit]

I don't keep lying DS down because it becomes like a game for him to get straight back up. I lie down next to the cot and when he stands up I pat the mattress to signal to him to lie back down and say "night night" quietly. This has gone well so far - 4 days in a row of being asleep by 8pm. I have had to pick him up a couple of times when he has got upset or banged his head on the cot bars as he was crashing around, but I think he has learnt that he needs to lie down. When I was lying him down every time he stood up I just got very very annoyed and stressed. My new system means at least I can lie down comfortably in a dim room and breathe deeply and relax a bit.

Is there another pesky sleep regression at 18 months?

[Hadagutsful]

Yes that sounds good. This evening he did actually lie himself back down when I told him to. Still fell asleep feeding though and bloody tweaking my other nipple.