Neither my 4yo or my 7mo will sleep in their beds...

[Dragonball]

hi there - wondering if anyone has any advice - we are at our wits ends and getting too sleep deprived to see the woods for the trees...my 7 month old DD was doing great at going down during the night after a breastfeed - but roughly since I've stopped breastfeeding 6 weeks ago, she wakes a few times in the night crying and just won't go back in her cot...she ends up in bed with us - which isn't great, as we have a 4yo who also ends up in bed with us - we've tried mostly everything, but he doesn't even seem to remember coming in - and often we're asleep when he does come in and if we're awake, too exhausted to put him back...(we will often go to him 3/4 times in the night before he eventually comes to our room)...So, does anyone have any advice?

The baby is exceptionally happy during the day - and during the night, as soon as she is being held, she mainly drops off quickly (although she's just cutting her first tooth, so been a bit harder to soothe her back to sleep in the last week)...I give her water and teething things before I get the milk out - and she generally has about 5-6oz once a night - she eats like a sumo wrestler during the day so I know she's a hungry little thing, so I don't think it's time to take away her milk at night - but if only she would go back in her cot - as soon as I go to put her back, she wakes up.

We've tried pick-up, put-down but that only seems to annoy her intensely and she then ends up more awake then ever! And I've given her little comforters/ one of my tops, muslins etc to see if she needs something like that - but it just isn't working. I'm not a fan of CC - but am I being too soft? I have tried to leave her in her cot when she cries, without picking her up, and stroking her/ talking to her, but she just fights me, rather than it soothing her. To complicate matters, she is still in our room for numerous reasons - but she will be going to share with her brother as soon as we can get the time to move her in there - but is that only going to make things worse!!
Would LOVE some advice on this - we didn't sleep for two years with our first - until we gave in and just let him sleep with us, but determined to get my bed back..

Help!