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Ds is five months and on the whole, he's a pretty good sleeper. We have a few issues but nothing major. The problem I think, is me.
First four months he slept on my lap of an evening then I'd take him up to bed with me, final feed, lullaby on, kisses and down he went no problem. I started to wonder if he'd get better sleep if I took him up earlier - same routine just brought forward. He was starting to have erratic sleep in the evening before we went up, you see.
Problem is sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. That's fine, he's a baby, it won't always be plain sailing. My problem is me - I get so agitated if I can't get him to sleep. I feel angry and it shocks me. I try to tell myself it doesn't matter, try again tomorrow, ultimately he's a great sleeper. But when he's fussing - like constantly pulling his dummy out then crying for it then pulling it out etc - it drives me nuts. I'm worried I'm passing all this negativity into him. After one night of being up there two hours and screaming into a pillow in frustration I now set myself a time limit - 30 mins and we go back down to the rocker because I can cuddle him to sleep easy.
Rocking him to sleep then putting him down doesn't work otherwise I'd just do that. And part of me thinks the randomness of it means done nights he just wants a cuddle. Like I said, the problem isn't him. I don't know what this agitation is or how to diffuse it, and it's making me so miserable
I totally understand. I get like this about DS and his naps. The first few months he wouldn't nap at all at home, had to be walked/driven for hours blah blah and I nearly lost my mind. Now, if he doesn't settle straightaway for his naps I freak out totally, and immediately panic that things are going back to the dark days of hours of overtired screaming... I have just been diagnosed with PND and anxiety and put on tablets, so am hoping that the shaking and feeling physically sick everytime I put him upstairs to go to bed will soon cease... I don't even know what I think will happen if he misses a nap, just that he CAN'T. For me it's definitely control related, I am really struggling with the randomness of parenthood!
Maybe go to the GP and talk to them and see if they can help at all? Hope you feel better soon x
Hello I can remember feeling like this, I used to occasionally get irrationally angry when dd wouldn't settle and go to sleep, it scared me sometimes
I found I felt more in control once I sorted out a bedtime routine and started putting dd down about 7pm ish. TBH I think before then when she was up more in the evening she was getting way too over stimulated and this was making her scream for much longer.
I had a set bedtime routine and made sure she obv had a full tummy, was warm enough, in a dark quiet room etc, if she cried I would set a timer and come back up and reassure her every 10mins. When I first started doing this I thought it would go on all night but dd really surprised me and settled after about 30mins. Gradually over the next couple of weeks the time it took her to settle got less and less and I also learnt the difference between dd crying because she was genuinely upset and when she was just grumbling a bit as she tried to settle herself.
Sorry seem to of waffled on a bit but hope you get my point!!