How can I stop my fear from enjoying this family holiday?

(12 Posts)
Linus33 Sun 07-Feb-16 10:49:51

We're off skiing to L2A for half term next week. The family 2DS (14 and 9) and OH are so looking forward to it and this is our first family skiing holiday.

I skied a lot when I was younger and lived in Scottish ski resort until I was late teens but since then I've not skied at all. So, here we are nearly 30 years later about to embark on our family skiing holiday! Since the skiing days of my youth I seemed to have become afflicted with a crippling phobia which I think is heights (although flying, London Eye, helicopters don't seem to trigger the panic).

I so don't want to spoil this holiday for the rest of the family and I know that once upon a time I enjoyed skiing with a passion but how can I get this fear under control - I think the chairlifts are causing me the biggest issue.

Has anyone learned how to get a grip of a crippling phobia and get it under control? I have had had CBT treatment but this was some time ago which did help a bit at the time but the fear is back bigger and stronger now.

Over the last couple of weeks as we've been getting ourselves ready, I've kind of stuck my head in the sand and tried to put it to the back of my mind but we're so close now.

Any help/advice much appreciated. I'm sure I'm not the only one that doesn't want to avoid these lifetime experiences because of an irrational fear.

cestlavielife Sun 07-Feb-16 16:10:57

it's a holiday
you dont have to do anything you dont want to
look for runs that have gondolas/telecabine rather than chairlift?

Tokelau Sun 07-Feb-16 16:18:58

What worries you about the chairlifts? Is it the height? Or getting on and off? Chairlifts have really improved in the last 30 years. In the resort that we go to, most of them are new. They slow down for people to get on and off and it's much easier than they used to be. There is one old one left there, and I find it really hard to get on and off, it goes so fast and bashes you in the legs! I'm sure it will be replaced soon though.

Otherwise, what about going to a resort where there are mainly drag lifts? That way you don't leave the ground.

I can't help with getting over a phobia, sorry.

What did you mean by L2A?

Gotheftosleep Sun 07-Feb-16 16:20:01

L2A is Les Deux Alps, I think.

bamboobeanbags Sun 07-Feb-16 17:30:43

I think most people who suffer from a fear of heights find chairlifts which go "up and over" the hardest so try to avoid those.

Make sure the people you are with are aware of your worries and talk, talk, talk about anything but heights the while way up. It will be over before you know it. Oh and look up not down!

Linus33 Sun 07-Feb-16 17:33:32

Tokelau - yes L2A is Les Deux Alps. It is the chairlifts and it is the height. Not worried about getting on or off. We're going with a group so I didn't have a say in the destination.

Thanks cestlavielife - you're right of course but I so don't want this taking over my life; I want to control it not the other way around but I fear I will spend my holiday looking to avoid the chairlifts!

I'm building myself up to force myself to do it as I know that exposure is a way of overcoming it but the fear is so powerful (and terrifying) I'm trying to find some coping mechanisms to help so thank you for your suggestions.

puffylovett Mon 08-Feb-16 00:02:40

Hypnotherapy got me through birth and ditching cigarettes....worth a try?

anotherdayanothersquabble Tue 09-Feb-16 07:43:39

Get some Bach Flowers Mimilus. Have 7 drops in water three times a day from now until the end of the holiday and carry it with you, have a few drops when you feel anxious, before going out, as and when you need it. Take a bottle of rescue remedy too in case you have a shock or a fall or get completely paniced.

beachhead Tue 09-Feb-16 15:41:38

Hi Linus- I know how you're feeling , but I'm sure youll have a great time , once back on slopes hooked on the skiing, you'll not be worrying!

We're a first time ski family too 4 of us, flights to France Friday morning.! I'm looking fwd to but I havnt skied for ages 25yrs, but older son has he cant wait.

, but I carnt help feeling little cautious as I had accident all those years ago, someone skiied into me, I dislocated my shoulder. But well over that now, just bit older and wiser.

I'm found the comments helpful here, will try the herbal suggestion. I really want all of us to enjoy the holiday, hubby to enjoy his first try , I'm sure he will _he's is fit as he runs all the time, even if I end up in the spa pool all week.

I'm sure you will overcome slight worries, and have fun.

Linus33 Sun 21-Feb-16 18:03:25

I just wanted to thank everyone (belatedly) for all your advice and to give a post-skiing trip update.

Well, I took the 'feel the fear and do it anyway' strategy which wouldn't normally have worked if the phobic fear kicked in but thankfully it didn't and I coped. Admittedly I did close my eyes on the first couple of chairlift ascents but after some time I was able to open them for a few seconds, bottled it and closed them again! But, slowly I managed to ride the chairlifts with trepidation but not fear.

Now, to tackle a twenty-year long phobia of the London underground escalators! grin

lovetoskimum Mon 22-Feb-16 12:00:30

Linus33, well done on the chair lifts, I am okish on them but panic when it's time to get off, last year I ended up doing a Bridget Jones and fell off, much to husband's and daughter's laughing smile

I do admit that I get vertigo in a few of the high ones but don't look down and just keep talking !! Good luck with the London underground, let us know how you get on X

Linus33 Tue 23-Feb-16 08:22:43

Thanks lovetoskimum. Yes, agree getting off does have its moments! DS1 had one of those. We were riding a chair together I got off and 5 secs later I heard an 'err, Mum....' I looked back to find that he hadn't successfully got off and was heading back down. Thankfully, he did think and had begun to replace the safety bar. I thought we'd have to wait for him to go back down and back up again but the operator stopped the lift but we had to manage a 10ft drop to the ground (no reverse on a chairlift apparently!)

Anyway all ended well! grin

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