Vipers' nest? Come counter our hissy rep with your stories of Mumsnet Niceness

(486 Posts)
HelenMumsnet (MNHQ) Fri 12-Apr-13 10:42:32

Hello.

Well, it's been bit of a week, hasn't it? <understatement>

And we don't know about you but we think it's time folks outside MN knew a bit more about the lovely side of Mumsnet. All this stuff about harridans and vipers' nests kinda feels a bit lopsided to us - and is certainly making us pull on our Uggs wink and want to redress the balance a bit.

We're really chuffed to see such kind words about MN on Talk at the moment and also to see blogs like MmeLindor's that focus so beautifully on the "other side" of Mumsnet.

But we also want to publish, for all the world and the odd tabloid journo to see, a kinda showcase/archive of all the Lovely & Nice Things Mumsnetters Have Done over the years. And we'd really like your help with that, please.

Obviously, we have lots of Mumsnet Loveliness in mind already: ranging from Woolly Hugs to the Christmas Appeal and including everything from the lost toy on Blackpool Pier to the small acts of kindness shown every day from one MNer to another in need of help, advice or support.

But we really want you to tell us, too, about the Lovely Things you've seen (or taken part in) on Mumsnet. Please post them here - with links to the threads if you possibly can.

We'll read them all and, when we've run out of tissues, we'll publish some of your favourites for all the world to see.

Oh, and here's a pic of (warm and lovely) nest of vipers, courtesy of the fab women behind Woolly Hugs, to kinda set the tone smile

Just the fact that this is a supportive place, a great place to rant when you need to and you also get a kick up the arse when it's needed as well.

GentleOtter Fri 12-Apr-13 10:58:09

Our family received an enormous amount of support, practical advice and positive help when the story of our roof/ water/ feudal landowner broke.
We felt quite overwhelmed with the response but it honestly helped all of us to get through the really bad days and long, frozen winters.
I want to mention the Secret Santas too as their kindness has not been forgotten.

MmeLindor came up to visit us and has kept an ongoing support. Aitch has been a tower of strength too. So many of you took the time to write to MSPs, the FM Alex Salmond and personal letters to me.
I find it hard to express how much all of you on MN helped us. x

I've seen loads. The mners who turned up to help another one clear her house as she felt she was bad for her dh whom she clearly adored. It was wonderful to read her go from despair to hope.

YoniDoesntGrowOnTrees Fri 12-Apr-13 11:05:17

The huge number who signed up for the Anthony Nolan trust in response to other mums ill children.

Mile for Maude

Peters pink heart.

Will think of more.

FarelyKnuts Fri 12-Apr-13 11:07:17

I met a lovely bunch of women on here who now are a group of women I chat to online every day.
We have supported each other through illness, money worries, every day work and life and having children stuff as well as just general "how was your day" care.
We are scattered all over England and Ireland and are planning a meetup later this year. I would count them among the first people I would go to if I was looking for advice or empathy or care.
Without Mumsnet I would never have met them.

EchoBitch Fri 12-Apr-13 11:12:26

A bunch of atrocious cunts kept me going all last year when my Mum was very ill and later died.

She lived nearly 200 miles from me and i was with her, having almost abandoned my own DP and DC for almost a year so she wasn't alone and didn't have to go to a care home which neither of us could have borne.

When she died i was a wreck and a week or so later a delivery arrived of a beautiful rose to plant in the garden,a grape vine and a bottle of very posh Vodka.

DP was astonished,one of those wonderful mners had been in touch with DD to get organise it as a surprise.

I was overwhelmed,we are all still in touch regularly,they are just amazing and kindness personified and a huge laugh aswell.

WorraLiberty Fri 12-Apr-13 11:14:34

The trouble with trying to link to the lovely, supportive threads is that if they were posted in Chat, they disappear after 3 months.

I'm thinking of the thread a few months back where the OP and her disabled DH had let the housework slide so much, their house was barely livable.

A few MNetters went round, rolled their sleeves up and helped to scrub the house back to a livable standard.

It was lovely to read smile

CMOTDibbler Fri 12-Apr-13 11:15:35

I think its the everyday things on here that make me proud to be a MNetter - hands to hold when people are awaiting scary medical tests, a queue of knitting harridans waiting for the live POAS and offering support if the result isn't what people want, the ever positive support for those in abusive relationships.

But there are the bigger things too - crossing my fingers everyday for Beatrice through her all too short life, raising awareness of bone marrow donation inspired by Ailidh and Billie, secret santa etc etc

CMOTDibbler Fri 12-Apr-13 11:17:39

Oh, and I forgot the MNetters who, knowing that my bad arm couldn't tolerate cold, and I couldn't get gloves over the splints I was in for a long time, made me beautiful mittens and wristwarmers that would fit. I treasure them.

LadyMaryQuiteContrary Fri 12-Apr-13 11:18:06

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/childrens_health/1649084-DS-still-asleep-what-to-do This one. CluchingPearl's little boy had chicken pox at the start of the year and she was struggling to wake him up. After some advice from mumsnetters he was taken to the hospital where they realised that he was seriously ill. We've followed and supported throughout all of this. Little ClutchingPearl's is now home. It makes me weep whenever I think of this. [sob]

JonBonYoni Fri 12-Apr-13 11:22:22

Woolly hugs, the ongoing support for Trazzletoes and her ds is phenomenal, my AnteNatal Lot Aprilites 2011, have hld my hand through some really shitty stuff and I've held theirs.

CaramelLatte Fri 12-Apr-13 11:23:02

The thread I remember most wad
s the one Worra referred to. It was one of the first threads I read when I joined MN and it really moved me to see how total strangers probably turned that posters life around. There could have been such a different outcome without the kindness of MN also the whole support she received on the whole thread, not one negative comment. It still brings a lump to my throat now. Often wonder how she is now.

SuffolkNYoni Fri 12-Apr-13 11:29:29

Wooly hugs makes me proud to be part of MN and keeps reminding me I need to learn to knit!

Classics is guaranteed to make me smile, that section was my life line when I was in the midst of AND and agoraphobia when expecting DD.

Roopoo Fri 12-Apr-13 11:31:18

After my first DC had PND. I couldn't see a way out and just wanted to go to sleep and not wake up.
A bunch of faceless strangers replied and chatted to me. Checking in day after day to see if I was ok. The kindness shown to me was incredible. I was and am humbled.

Gerrof Fri 12-Apr-13 11:32:24

The general kindness. There is a lot of that. When you are really down somebody will listen and will help.

I was very ill some years ago and someone sent me a DVD and scent. It was really cheering to get something like that from a stranger when I was bed bound for weeks.

Dolallytats Fri 12-Apr-13 11:32:31

I've had nothing but support when I've posted. I am agoraphobic and have been having a hard time with it getting worse since I have been pregnant. I felt really awful about not being able to be a 'proper mum' to my DS. The responses were all lovely, giving advice and telling me their own experiences. It really helped.

That's the one Worra. You put it far more succinctly than me.

A MNetter talked me through sorting out a sod of a problem at work when they were trying to revoke my flexible working agreement. It would have caused chaos for me. She even wrote me emails to send to personnel and they backed off.

A MNetter in Ireland sent me Irish chocolate because I was desperately in need of some.

A few MNetters have done the Argos run for me when items are out of stock near me.

MNetters talked me into going to the GP when my first round of PND hit and gave me advice on how to approach the subject.

MNetters have answered most every damn fool question that I've had over the last 6 years from stolen sideboards to oven cleaning and a lost sausage.

It's fashionable to slate us but there is no better place for online support and, sometimes, the only support available to someone. The naysayers need to dig deeper, give AIBU a swerve and see what we're really made of.

Oh, forgot. The amount of people who will offer help/money/clothes/whatever to a poster in need, even if some people are calling troll or scam. They may be right but the offers of help are what defines MN.

helen there's an awesome post from AIBU that's quite recent, and just lovely

www.mumsnet.com/.../1728550-WIBU-to-give-money-anonymously

That one had me booing instantly. Not Just the OP but the responses too

Badvoc Fri 12-Apr-13 11:47:39

Just the general kindness and humour I think.
The fact that people want to help.
Some MNers are experts on their filed and give their advice for free on a regular basis.
I think AIBU has really badly affected the public perception of MN is and I can see why.
If you only checked out that particular board it would terrify you! smile

JulesJules Fri 12-Apr-13 11:48:26

Ooh just a couple of examples off the top of my head...

Woolly hugs

The thread that started with Trinity wanting to buy 2nd hand shoes for her daughters

Just in the last few days D0g's thread asking for postcards for her daughter www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/1725503-Bit-cheeky-but-would-anyone-like-to-send-my-dd-a-postcard

Tiktok's bf support

And generally the wit and humour - see Mumsnet Classics for a million examples.

I have been involved in a few of the above, and (trying not to sound too cheesy) it is genuinely lovely to have the opportunity to do something kind for someone.

5madthings Fri 12-Apr-13 11:48:38

A lovely mnetter, helped me sort out ds4's bday present. A very specific captain america costume that i coukdnt get in his size in the uk. She got it in america, brought it back and posted it to me.

A bunch of us are all on the woolly hugs running thread supporting each other as we attempt to train and get fit for various sponsored runs. I am running in may with a few others and until 10wka ago.had nevrr run in my life, the general chat and cajouling on our running thread is fabulous.

aargh the link doesn't work.... But why! I have it in my history....

5madthings Fri 12-Apr-13 11:51:25

It was neithershreddednorsmug who helped me with ds4's bday present after i mentioned it on the running thread.

Isabeller Fri 12-Apr-13 11:55:58

Sanity and kindness from HQ.

I have got masses personally from MN support, laughs and watching the occasional bunfight (as long as the bun's are soft) but it is the way HQ deals with everything, modelling the best kind of parent, which I most appreciate. You make it as safe as possible without being overprotective.

If someone is unwell and being unpleasant you appear to deal with it as kindly and fairly as possible.

I have no idea of the context but I saw someone getting unbanned when their child was ill. I've seen nasty attacks dealt with quickly and lots of humour and gentle reminders of the guidelines.

There are quieter and kinder areas for sensitive discussion and huge robust bouncy castles for letting off steam.

Oh dear, getting teary now, whatever next. Might need a tissue box emoticon xx

TheDoctrineOfSnatch Fri 12-Apr-13 11:56:35

That whenever anyone posts a "Please help", there are 5-10 practically instant "here for you" responses, even in the middle of the night.

All the Bereavement threads, of course, MiasMummy being just one example.

Magna Fri 12-Apr-13 12:03:01

If it wasn't for MN I wouldn't have met some wonderful people who have become very dear friends.

We all live around the world but they have always been there for me no matter how small or big a problem.

If it wasn't for MN and MardyBra I wouldn't have these wonderful ladies in my life so a massive thanks from me.

OrWellyAnn Fri 12-Apr-13 12:16:41

Can't find the thread, but the op had an ectopic pregnancy and didn't realise it, and mn posters convinced her to get to hospital, which probably saved her bacon. There have been so many like this over the years. But it's not just the bigger 'media worthy' stories that make MN so special. It's the FACT that every single day on here someone reaches out and others rise to the occasion and provide support, advice, humour and insight that make a hard situation manageable. Our generation is the first that has had such an enormous resource (the web) to draw on for support and knowledge and company and I think MN exemplifies the use of this at it's very best. In RL the sense of community has been lost in so many ways and I see a genuine sense of community on here which is available to anyone with the ability to see past the jiggles (which you have to do in RL too right? We live on earth, not in some fairy dreamland where everyone is always saccharine to one another)
The naysayers can't have been on here very long if they have missed this, and must mostly have visited AIBU... Because you can't help but stumble on it everywhere you turn on other threads.

OrWellyAnn Fri 12-Apr-13 12:17:54

Jiggles?? Niggles, by which I mean occasional narkiness...

hypnotizingchickens Fri 12-Apr-13 12:24:50

Mn has brought me some wonderful RL friends.

Mn has brought me a sense of connection with others that is amazing and astonishing.

Mn has brought me an enormous sense of pride that women could have created, and still be creating, such an astonishing, powerful, and novel form of communication and community in this modern age.

I think that last one goes some way to explaining the quite bewildering animosity that is directed at us at the moment. It frightens me. And anger me.

I think mn is amazing. Truly amazing. My personal belief is that it marks a real potential power-shift in terms of gender relations and in terms of communication forms (and that such a communication shift might have women at the front of it is soooo cool ... I get v. excited about that!).

I am constantly astonished by the kindness, sense and wisdom that is shown on mn. The fact that that is being silenced by propaganda emphasising a supposed negative side ... very worrying. Whose interests does that serve?

Anyway ... other lovely things ....

I love Secret Santa, and Woolly Hugs, and the many small acts of kindness. But for my money the ultimate thing about mn is that it allows women to share words, when words are needed, when words are the most important things you could have, when the giving and taking of words is as necessary as breath. And also it allows us to share the words that describe and make our lives: funny; horrible; banal; amazing; sublime; inept, deft.

I luuuuurrrve mn.

ForYourEyesYoni Fri 12-Apr-13 12:25:24

All the 'big' ones mentioned here, but also the way in which you can ask for help on anything, and people will kindly give their opinion/experience/views.

Recently, I've pondered about what new phone to buy, and got loads of helpful replies. I've dipped a toe into the world of Ebay-ing, and had a gazillion questions, all of which had probably been answered before, all of which people took the time to help me with.

hypnotizingchickens Fri 12-Apr-13 12:26:06

"Our generation is the first that has had such an enormous resource (the web) to draw on for support and knowledge and company and I think MN exemplifies the use of this at it's very best."

i really agree with what you said there, Orwellyan.

YonirockandrollbutIlikeit Fri 12-Apr-13 12:30:30

In the last week or so, two different posters have said that their husbands had chest pain and were refusing medical help. In both cases the OPs were advised (i.e. told!) to call 999. IIRC one of the men had had a heart attack and received treatment, and the other had pneumonia.

Ongoing support for posters in hospital who are bored / scared / desperate.

Ongoing support for a MNer whose relative was stabbed (he's on the way to recovery smile).

Helping one woman (that I know of) leave a hideous relationship in which she was abused daily. She posted in relationships and it went from there - she was helped physically, emotionally and financially to leave this horrible man.

The support I've received when life feels really shit in the middle of the night and there's no-one I can talk to in real life.

Long running threads to help MNers with alcohol problems, toxic parents and emotionally abusive relationships.

Useful links from posters in the relationship section.

Hands held during particularly scary and awful moments. Hugs given for bereavements, PND or crappy days.

And the laughter, obviously. smile

headlesslambrini Fri 12-Apr-13 12:30:52

Maryz thread in teenagers, it lets you know that we are not alone and that we havent been bad parents because our dcs make the wrong decisions sometimes.

MN is there for the toughest times in a parents life, from conception to death. It is a constant which will hug you, cry with you, laugh with you and most importantly be honest with you whether you want to hear it or not. Day or night, MN will never let you down. It has, quite honestly, helped me to trust in people again.

When my dd3 was born, I was told she was going to die. I had no idea where to turn, other than to MN. Hundreds of anonymous posters offered me support in those early days, and as it became clear dd was going to hang on as long as possible, the wonderful folk on the SN children's board helped me to fight for Beatrice and offered solutions that no medical professional was willing to suggest. Many times Beatrice became seriously ill, and each time, MN was there with prayers or kind wishes.. Eventually after 13 glorious but exhausting months, Beatrice passed away, but MN didn't abandon me. Some lovely MNers even came to her funeral. I'd be nowhere without MN and I know for sure I wouldn't have had the strength or expertise to give Beatrice the life she had, if it hadn't have been for you guys. Thank you MN, you filthy nest of vipers, you...

TSSDNCOP Fri 12-Apr-13 12:31:43

I've had help from lovely, generous women when asking about how to cope with DS's SEN.

I was inspired by the Debka house-tidying thread. We had a massive clear-out on Sunday and prior to starting I said to DH we were going to do a Debka. He was confused

BornToFolk Fri 12-Apr-13 12:35:43

There were photos on Facebook recently of Billie's Blankets going off to Malawi and it made me very proud to be a Woolly Hugger. The posts from parents of children who have received a Little Hug make me realise how much of a difference they can make and inspire me to make more!

One of the threads that always sticks with me is the mum in Canada who posted about how she worried that it was going to be a rubbish Christmas as she couldn't afford many presents etc for her small daughter. Loads of people responded with excellent ideas about cheap/free things to do and presents to make. The OP ended up being really excited about Christmas. It was properly heart-warming and lovely.

On a personal note, the very wise regulars on the Relationship board gave me tremendous supprt and advice when exP had an affair and walked out (nearly a year ago! shock) They were right about everything and I don't think I'd have coped nearly so well without them.

TSSDNCOP Fri 12-Apr-13 12:36:16

Hi Cup, I think if you and Beatrice often. I was certain I'd see a post from you here.

I hope you and your family are well xx

TheDoctrineOfSnatch Fri 12-Apr-13 12:39:02

Admission, prh47bridge and tiggytape are endlessly patient and helpful on school admissions.

There have been many threads on various subjects over the years which led to tears, either happy,funny or sad.

There have been threads that the person posting has been living in sheer hell but not knowing quite how bad it is because it has become their life. And only with help from the outside can they then see what every one else sees.

It doesn't matter what time you post their is always someone to help or listen.

I'm on thread at the moment where OP has had the year from hell and just had a baby and someone set up a google map to show the OP from where everyone is. And it was amazing to see that the support for the OP was not just in Britain but across the whole world.

But I do wonder if any newspaper would publish the 'true' face of Mumsnet as it not how they want us to be seen.

motherinferior Fri 12-Apr-13 12:42:32

I started a thread on MN 10 years ago, saying I was thinking of having a home birth but I was scared.

The encouragement and support I got was what kept me going with my home birth plans.

I started another thread a few months later asking for help with keeping on breastfeeding.

The encouragement and support was what kept me going with breastfeeding till my baby was 18 months old.

I've posted about days when I've been going off my head with exhaustion, days when I've resigned in tears from my job, days when I've felt as if I'm swimming uphill through custard....and again and again, I've had encouragement and support.

That's why I stay.

Well, that and the fact there are lots of bright funny posters who make me laugh, obviously.

YonirockandrollbutIlikeit Fri 12-Apr-13 12:43:10

I've just remembered another one - cheering someone on to finish their (slightly terrifying) assignment.

motherinferior Fri 12-Apr-13 12:43:13

PS one major thing that DOES put me off is the view that all journalists are Evil and to be Despised, though. I am a journalist and I am quite nice.

Hard to put into words isn't it - but agree with Orwellyan that we are the first generation to have had this amazing resource - essentially each other's friendship, wisdom, and humour - to draw on in such a broad way through the internet.
It's been amazing to see what we've made of it. The Woolly Hugs are just one wonderful manifestation of this creativity. The kind, encouraging words offered here every day are it's bedrock.
thanks

LadyMaryQuiteContrary Fri 12-Apr-13 12:44:25

The ectopic pregnancy was spookycharlotte, orWellyAnn It must have been in chat because it's not showing in a search. Haven't seen her around for years.

Sorry Motherinferior I didn't mean journalist but more the editors who listen more to would be 'famous' people, rather then looking at the whole picture.

Maybe not so 'important' as the others, but who remembers Nagoos MOOG?
I loved sending my wee packages away and receiving some lovely things too. I've still got the keyring NorksAreMessy made smile

MaureenMLove Fri 12-Apr-13 12:55:03

Gosh, where do you start? For the oldies amongst us, there was Mile for Maude and who can forget Pink Peter! I vaguely remember someone who was really nervous about travelling on a train and somehow it was arranged that there'd be a MNer at every station along her journey? Did that actually happen, or am I that old, I'm making it up! grin

I'm very lucky that I haven't needed any major support for anything in my life, but I did put out a call for a lost toy once, for one of my mindees. She was going into hospital for pretty major surgery and her parents were distraught at the loss of her favourite toy. They mentioned it to me and within 48 hours, a replacement was found and delivered to me.

There are some (and have been) some lovely people on here. I used to love frequenting Lizzies Tea Shop, The Childminders Staff Room and not forgetting the BBBAAAARRR!

It never ceases to amaze me, the kindest and generosity of complete strangers to one another.

Long live Mumsnet! grin

I have had so much advice and support on here, it's been a life line really.

The Secret Santa...

The carpet in my bedroom was from a MNetter, when I moved into this house and we were lacking in carpet and beds a lovely person gave me her old carpet. smile

There has been lots of other things too. MNetters really are lovely, no vipers!

EauRouge Fri 12-Apr-13 12:58:01

Oh god, that thread where some MNers went to help clean up someone's house had me in floods.

My DDs and I got some presents last year thanks to MN secret santa. I cried when they unwrapped them, it was so lovely to be nominated and for a total stranger to send such lovely presents.

You only have to look at any of the support threads, whether it's weight loss, illness, bereavement, antenatal or whatever to see the level of support.

Anyone who thinks MN is a nest of vipers isn't looking very bloody hard. Of course if you pick a controversial thread in AIBU you are going to see a bunfight but that's just one thread of thousands- take a closer look and see how supportive MN can be.

AngloSvensk Fri 12-Apr-13 12:58:38

Woolly Hugs make me proud to be an MNetter. Being able to use my craftiness to make squares and blankets for ill children, bereaving families, here and overseas.

Also, the kindness of strangers. I was feeling down and things were getting on top of me at home with my little ones and my housing situation. A kind MNetter put a KitKat in the post to me so I could "Have a break". How lovely is that!

I don't care what the DM or silly celebs say about MN, this is a fantastic place and just reading threads have helped me when I have been in need of advice. I like that the people here tell it like it is and don't fluffify things. Sometimes it takes straightforward comments to help you and you don't want to be mollicoddled (sp?).

MinkyWinky Fri 12-Apr-13 13:00:09

All the threads around miscarriage, TTC post-MC and getting through the early days of pregnancy have been amazingly supportive. They've kept me sane a) knowing I wasn't the only one b) through the mutual support, hand holding and unMumsnetty hugs smile

ouryve Fri 12-Apr-13 13:04:10

The sheer amount of support and handholding on the MN special needs boards makes it for me. Many of the parents on that board are going through a pretty hard time but achieve so much for their children, with the support of others.

SoupDragon Fri 12-Apr-13 13:04:44

I think there are far more nice stories about MN then there are viper ones TBH. They just aren't as newsworthy or we don't tend to be fluffy to journalists.

EmpressOfTheSevenOceans Fri 12-Apr-13 13:11:52

On the subject of fluffy....

The invisible duck,
The little boy who wanted stamps & got letters from MNers all over the world, and MNers helping to give Pombear's DD an unforgettable Christmas present.

None of them are lifechanging on the level of the ectopic pregnancy thread, but they're all examples of MNers working together to make children happy.

I've had friendship & support & a huge amount of entertainment from MN for five years now. That's the side the Daily Mail don't want to see.

AmandinePoulain Fri 12-Apr-13 13:13:57

From a personal perspective it was the support I received after having a mc 2 years ago, and then afterwards when I was tcc and my cycles were all over the place, and then when I was bleeding during my next pregnancy (that ended happily thank goodness smile).

I've also seen so much support for others that are going through far worse on here, as well as less upsetting problems like trying to find a Spider-Man onesie for a birthday present - mnetters from all over looked in Asda for the OP. It's times like that that I feel proud to be part of this little community smile

Oh, and really loving the woolly vipers - so cute !

guggenheim Fri 12-Apr-13 13:16:41

The kind support and ongoing care and tough love of the babes,especially mouse

After a long,boring battle with the booze I finally got my ass to an aa meeting and I've been sober for over 3 months. There is no way that I'd have done this without the fab babes,whose erm...'gentle' support helped me to understand that vino is not really the cure all I believed.

Quenelle Fri 12-Apr-13 13:17:00

After I had my miscarriage I received a PM from an MNer who I hadn't chatted to before but she had been on the same TTC thread as me. I hadn't told many people in RL that I was pregnant, none of my friends knew, so I had been finding it very hard carrying on as normal afterwards.

It meant a huge amount to me to receive that little note of sympathy and condolence.

A comment I read several years ago by a MNer with a disabled DC has always stayed with me. She remarked how hurtful it was that when her DC and their classmates were on trips out from school people never smiled at them. They ignored them, or even scowled at them, because they were disabled. I was shocked and it made me look at myself and my own actions. I have always believed I would never knowingly hurt anybody. Now I try to be actively kind, rather than just not unkind. I hope that makes sense and doesn't sound too twee, or smug.

milktraylady Fri 12-Apr-13 13:18:38

LucindaE and her unstinting support for all the people suffering from Hyperemesis. She just starts another thread when the last one fills up. She checks in on everyone, giving great advice. Links to info on the drugs. And basically great support. I don't know what I would have done without her for my 10 weeks of HG. The woman deserves a medal grin

The wise advice people give on the relationships threads. It's a joke to say LTB, but there have been some threads where this is what has happened and its the best thing for that woman. I find that sort of support is wonderful.

Mumsnet is like a little window into the world of other people's lives. Some are traumatic, some make me jealous (200 quid handbag anyone?) some make me grateful for what I have. There's a lot of love out there.

And it's really funny seeing a 'viper' get pulled to pieces- they never get let off lightly! shock

And on a crappy day I look for a mumsnet classics thread to cheer me up. I actually pulled a muscle in my stomach laughing so much one day. envy

Thank god for the day I found Mumsnet, my life is better for it.

issey6cats Fri 12-Apr-13 13:23:00

a few months ago i had been on facebook and noticed that a friend of my daughters had lost her 11 week old puppy, he got out of her garden, then i came into mumsnet and on dog lost there was a poster whos daughter had found a puppy in halifax i managed to connect the two ladies and the puppy was my daughters friends so one lost pup and one distraught owner reunited only a small thing but shows the connection of mumsnet to the rest of the internet

Tortington Fri 12-Apr-13 13:23:57

i got sent a parcel of coffee and chocolate from a couple of mumsnetters who knew i was down.

also, i have been at the recieving end of Xmas parcels when my kids were younger and i was skint

mumsnet literally saved xmas twice. so i try and do that for other mumsentter now i am in a position to.

Tortington Fri 12-Apr-13 13:24:39

mn meets are also v, awesome and saved my sanity when i moved to a new part of the country

lisad123everybodydancenow Fri 12-Apr-13 13:25:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sparklingbrook Fri 12-Apr-13 13:29:51

DS1 goes to school by coach 12 miles away. My big worry was the snow, and had nightmares about getting marooned at school. A Mnetter who lives by his school and has an appropriate vehicle said she would pick him up and bring him home if need be. I didn't have to take her up on the offer but I would have, and it was such a relief to think she would have done it.

It would have been an interesting call to the school. grin

lisad123everybodydancenow Fri 12-Apr-13 13:30:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tortington Fri 12-Apr-13 13:30:52

a mumsentter sent me a camera once - i think i mentioned that mine had bollocksed up and they sent it to me at no cost - just cos its a nice thing to do

Tortington Fri 12-Apr-13 13:32:10

I rememer asking about cooking

i couldnt cook for shit, and was asking about it - and mumsnetters started sending me cooking books!! i still have them - and would use them if my cooker were not broken

lisad123everybodydancenow Fri 12-Apr-13 13:34:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mamij Fri 12-Apr-13 13:35:18

It's funny. I've always see MN as a nice place to go for support and advice. There are, of course, the bitchiness, like there is in RL. However, social media loves a "nasty" story to bring in readership. There's nothing interesting about MNetters out there being an online advocate, friend, knitting blankets, bereavement support, doing charity work etc.

So even though some people have a negative view of MN, the good definitely outweighs the bad.

Sparklingbrook Fri 12-Apr-13 13:36:34

A poster had a pregnant cat turn up at her house. She took it in and it had kittens in her cupboard. smile She couldn't afford the vets bills so we had a whip round and sent Supermarket vouchers so she could use the food money to pay the vet.

whokilleddannylatimer Fri 12-Apr-13 13:37:27

A mumsnetter I had never met in real life is one of my dc Godparents.

I remember the story were two mumsnetters were witnesses at a wedding (something to do with knickers on a head in user name)

The people who have provided food/clothes parcels in times of need.

The people who have offered to pick up victims escaping DV in the middle of the night.

The mumsnetters who paid for a hotel for a member and her kids for the night to give her chance to get out and get help from WA.

The members that went down to a members house to help them practically when they lost a loved one.

3WiseYonis Fri 12-Apr-13 13:40:41

All the amazing kindness mentioned above and also the HUMOR.

We all need to laugh, it's so good for one & I have laughed until needing a Tena Lady on here.

whokilleddannylatimer Fri 12-Apr-13 13:43:13

A mile for Maud was what made me change from another site babycentre to here smile in 2007 (i think).
I had never heard of Mumsnet the shame until then.

Tortington Fri 12-Apr-13 13:44:08

you know how people 'google' things for answers,

well in this house we 'mumsnet it' dh and (grown) kids frequently say "ask mumsnet - they'll know"

You're always there to tell me my boss is a twat - which is most appreciated

whokilleddannylatimer Fri 12-Apr-13 13:44:56
whokilleddannylatimer Fri 12-Apr-13 13:46:33

Yes Yes Custardo, dc1 also asks me to ask Mumsnet.

She even tells her teacher to ask Mumsnet if said teacher does not know answer to something.

TumbleWeeds Fri 12-Apr-13 13:46:38

The thing is the help you get from MN isn't always present just in one thread.

It's reading other people stories that have made a huge difference to me when the dcs were little. I learnt about all sort of different approach on parenting (including attachment parenting and AK that I had never heard about before). I might not have posted on these threads at the time or asked a specific question but they helped A LOT.

In the same way I learnt about autism and asperger (both of which I then realized apply to my ds and my DH) and this had been a life saver.

The reality is though, if we were all 'vipers' ready to shred people to bits all the time, MN wouldn't be so successful anyway.

Tortington Fri 12-Apr-13 13:48:38

"The reality is though, if we were all 'vipers' ready to shred people to bits all the time, MN wouldn't be so successful anyway."

this^^

who goes onto a site to simply get annihilated?

KarlosKKrinkelbeim Fri 12-Apr-13 13:53:59

The lovely, knowledgeable MN'ers who made me see there was something amiss with DS's development when every health-care professional I saw was fobbing me off - and who pointed me in the direction of the intervention which would help him (ABA).
DS is now 6, happily integarted in MS school with good friends and doing great academically. I can state categorically this would not be the case without the advice and guidance these women gave me at a crucial time. If any of them are reading this - Peachy, saintly, pagwatch, moondog and others - I'd like them to know what they did and how much I owe them.

neriberi Fri 12-Apr-13 13:54:47

In general MN is place that makes me laugh / angry / happy / sad in equal measure, it also reminds me that I'm only human and that I'm not alone...!

Recently I discovered a support thread about chronic fatigue, having been diagnosed with a really rare type of anemia and bone farrow failure, this thread gave me a chance to say all the things I haven't been able to say aloud and for that I am truly grateful.

Pozzled Fri 12-Apr-13 13:57:17

The threads that stand out most for me are the ones that could not be linked or published- women suffering abuse who receive the support, advice and encouragement for as long as they need it.

Others that come to mind:
I remember the ectopic pregnancy one.

The one where the OP had to look after an exclusively bf baby unexpectedly- it was late at night, her own children were in bedand she had no bottles/formula etc and no one she could call on. There was loads of advice and suggestions, but also offers of help.

A thread where the OP was typing incoherently and seemed to be in a bad way- I don't remember what happened in the end, it may even have been a troll. But people responded with great concern and compassion.

I've seen a lot of threads about unexpected pregnancies where the op is given reassurance that things will be ok in the end, whatever they decide.

Jux Fri 12-Apr-13 13:57:34

All the people who talked to me calmly and kindly when my mum became ill and couldn't eat - CMOT told me of sip feeds, which kept her going and gave her pleasure.

All the people who were wonderful and kind when mum died, and then my brother died, and then my dd (then 10) went off the rails emotionally.

All the people who helped with suggestions, information and support, when MIL became so demented and sFIL was behaving like an arse (still is) so no one cleaned her or fed her and she was living on biscuits and sherry.

I could go on - been here a while.

All the support and help, kindness and patience given freely to women (and sometimes men) whose partners are horribly abusive. Building up enough confidence for them to seek help, to help them see that they and their children are not worthless and of no value. I goes on and on and on; there are so many. sad

The bereavement threads, the emotional abuse support threads, the simple straightforward kindness that is on display here in spades if you just look a bit beyond AIBU.

MN has enhanced my life immeasurably, and I know I'm not alone in that.

zzzzz Fri 12-Apr-13 14:00:33

The sn board is a very very special place.

The secret Santa gifts I got still make me go all sniffy, because they were quite simply one of the nicest things that have ever happened to me. blush

All that Yoni-ing is also very funny.

The sheer number of people who prayed, hoped and wept for Ailidh will stay with me always.

The discovery of like minded nutters enthusiasts on the now long-running party planning thread has distracted me when stressed and given me the best excuse for vicarious shopping (online searching and RL shopping too grin).

Jux Fri 12-Apr-13 14:01:43

Oh yes, dh and dd always ask me to ask MN if we're having trouble with something. It's my first port of call! Often I don't have to ask as there'll be an answer in the archives somewhere.

FryingNemo Fri 12-Apr-13 14:03:53

Tiktok and her wonderful BF support and sense helped me immensely.
Then there was the lovely mumsnetter who put me in touch with a midwife who I could talk to about my concerns after DS was born.
Then there was the lovely viper who sent me nappy covers she did not need anymore on the understanding I pass them on.
And then there was the lovely viper who gave me a lot of advice about schools in Luxembourg.
Loads of lovely vipers with the odd atrocious cunt thrown in.

KarlosKKrinkelbeim Fri 12-Apr-13 14:04:14

Can I ask who has been being horrible about MN this week? Why has this been such a bad week? This place is fairly used to getting a pasting from the ignorant,the humourless and the misogynist after all

The Brave Babes threads have been going for over three years now and have offered loads of us invaluable help and support as we struggle with alcohol issues. These threads are so supportive and non-judgmental and have genuinely helped dozens of people get and stay sober and many many more to pull back and take control of problem drinking.

SmellieWellies Fri 12-Apr-13 14:04:39

I was discussing MN with my DH quite recently. We also, (like Custardo say 'mumsnet it'). He is occasionally scathing of MN, but i pointed out that i have been quite isolated in the past few years. I am not from here (aka a forriner) and we moved to a small community because of his work and his family. Nearly everything we have is his- HIS friend. HIS family. HIS circle of contacts. Nothing is mine or just for me. For a time I had no friends or support, and even now i am quite shy and do not have many friends in real life.... but am slowly gathering a circle.

Factor in PND, a shockingly bad working life, and various other things, and essentially, MN for me is the circle of support/friends/family that I do not have in reality. I come on here for laughs, for advice, to wind down. MN is an 'added value' to my life. I do not have a community around me, but I know there are people out there that respond to me, talk with me, and make me feel a part of something larger.

crazydrunkevilyoni Fri 12-Apr-13 14:05:31

Mn has done wonders for me whether it is when I feel like utter rubbish I can always rely on Mn for a good laugh or even when my head is a mess & I just need a friendly ear to listen .
We may come across as a bunch if 'Vipers that where Ugg Boots' but we are a huge supportive network from all around the world just ready to help & listen to each other .
I was having trouble before Christmas & had bu way of getting a Tree for my Ds & a lovely lady baught a tree round for me & I will never forget the kindness thanks

SanityClause Fri 12-Apr-13 14:06:00

Just recently there was a lady who had to leave her home really quickly, as she was concerned her EX and EXMIL were coming to take her child/ren away from her.

She was sitting in a cafe, and really panicking.

People suggested she contact the police.

She was so panicked, she just hadn't considered that, and was able to post a couple of hours later about how helpful the police had been.

Oh, and a while ago, when someone posted about did we think it was selfish of someone without a partner to have a baby. Everyone turned on her, and said "Of course not, don't be so judgy". Turned out, she wanted to have a baby, but had no partner and was worried that it was a selfish thing to do! So, even though she was apparently "flamed", in fact, she got the support she was looking for.

FryingNemo Fri 12-Apr-13 14:07:10

I wish mumsnet had been around when DD was born. If it had been I am sure I would not have agree to a pointless induction and DD wouldn't have spent the first two weeks of her life in intensive car.

crazydrunkevilyoni Fri 12-Apr-13 14:07:34

No not bu hmm

Also not forgetting the hilarious Typos grin

lisad123everybodydancenow Fri 12-Apr-13 14:12:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WouldBeHarrietVane Fri 12-Apr-13 14:13:49

Spooky charlotte's thread about what turned out to be ectopic pg:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/949211-Please-can-someone-help-me-Im-in-so-much-pain?pg=40&order=

The support and love shown in Bereavement, including Mumsnetters contributing ideas to MiasMummy's inspiring planting of a wood in Mia's memory.

The wonderful support on the bf threads with expert advice from tiktok but also numerous dedicated others including Eaurouge, jiltedjohnsjulie and others.

The mc threads were a lifeline for me when I mc. There is nowhere else that offers 24 hour support and peer experience to a mc woman. Mc is still largely taboo and it is sadly very rare for women to even tell very close friends they have mc and certainly extraordinarily rare to discuss the physical realities of it sad

EVERY mc woman should be given the web address for the board. The wonderful women of MN gave me support in the blackest time of my life after my mmc was confirmed at the 12 week scan. They helped me:

- decide whether to go for an ERPC or not
- by supporting me when I felt desperately low during and after
- through the testing process to determine what had caused my mc

I really can't express in words how grateful I am thanks

eminemmerdale Fri 12-Apr-13 14:14:42

I mentioned in a totally unrelated thread, that my daughter was unable to get any NHS funding for her hearing aid and that we are fundraising - as a by the by type coment. A lovely lovely lady PM'd me and offered some money to put towards it. Just kindess itself.

5madthings Fri 12-Apr-13 14:15:13

sparkling same here with the snow I was worried ds1 wouldn't be a blue to get home on the bus, he did manage but a lovely mnetter who lives near his school offered to put him up for the night if need be smile

I will also say I have learn a lot from the sn's boards and those posters who have children with son's, its made me much more aware and understanding.

LilRedWG Fri 12-Apr-13 14:17:02

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/707200-My-Dad-died-12-days-ago-and-now-Mum-39

This thread and the love, support and offers of help! I had various thread around this time and there was always someone there, regardless of the time. It got me through many a dark time. Thank you all!

LilRedWG Fri 12-Apr-13 14:17:23
WouldBeHarrietVane Fri 12-Apr-13 14:18:04

Please don't forget EMIN's thread about her new drug dependent baby foster child struggling with the withdrawal and crying in the greatest pain on morphine sad

The thread gave EMIN support as she looked after the baby and eventually she went to living adoptive patents.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/fostering/922821-drug-dependant-baby-advice-needed/AllOnOnePage

Gerrof Fri 12-Apr-13 14:28:26

Oh Harriet I remember devouring that thread and bawling when the baby got adopted.

Utterly haunting when she described the baby's cries when she was withdrawing from heroin.

I hope EMIN is OK - she was diagnosed with cancer wasn't she. What a wonderful woman she is.

NotTreadingGrapes Fri 12-Apr-13 14:29:43

MN is my safety blanket. I come and go, am recently back under a new name after a few months away but have been here on and off since 2004.

It's my safety blanket in a way that I know whatever life chucks at me, there will always be someone in cyberspace to hold my hand (and very probably make me snort tea through my nose) and make it better.

The threads that I often think of are Expats, and MrsDeVere's, Edgar's, CupOfTeas, Rindercellas, etc.

Threads that should never have to have been started, threads about children and partners that we all feel we know, by women who we should all feel proud to. smile

WilsonFrickett Fri 12-Apr-13 14:39:49

SN have made my DS and our lives immeasurably better in almost every single way. He's high functioning - too 'normal' for any official help. The SN board is my official help. Every technique, trick, battle I've won has come from the SN board. Complete lifeline.

Also thanks to the bravery and honesty of posters like MrsDeVere, countless parents now know that despite our own parents' attitudes to chicken pox, it is a very dangerous disease and children should be kept at home to protect others with low immunity. I genuinely didn't know this (thanks to my 70s mother and her love of chicken pox parties) and I know I'm not alone. I think this knowledge on a MNscale has probably saved countless lives over the years.

BIWI Fri 12-Apr-13 14:40:53

For me, one of the most fabulous things about Mumsnet is the real sense of community. People who go out of their way to help other people, no matter that they are total strangers.

Yes, there are the big things, like Secret Santa and the lovely Woolly Hugs crew, but it goes on all the time, often behind the scenes.

Just one small example - we're having to take undertake litigation at present, which is scary to say the least. And I have been given much advice by another MNetter, who is a solicitor, absolutely free.

When you're in a situation where you are panicking, sad, ill, lonely, frightened - or just need a quick answer to a question that is concerning you - there is always somebody here to help and to give you their time and hold your hand.

BeQuicksieorBeDead Fri 12-Apr-13 14:40:56

I had a MMC last year at 3 months, and previous to that I hadn't even been on mumsnet. Trawling the internet for answers, hope, someone who had been through the same, I stumbled on a mumsnet thread...I hadn't realised how low I actually was, and getting the advice, support and care of literally hundreds of mners helped me to come to terms with what had happened. No one made me feel daft for having a rant or a cry, and no one told me it 'was probably for the best'!

Best of all, a few months later I could 'pay back' the support, and help other mners who were going through the same and had questions about what would happen next. Without Mumsnet I don't think I would be feeling as strong as I do now. I recommend it to the people I care about as a place where you can find answers, support and sometimes, when you need it, a kick up the arse!

Doinmummy Fri 12-Apr-13 14:41:47

Maryz's support thread for difficult teens has been amazing. When I felt so low , they picked me up. When I was slagged off in RL they made me feel better, not once was I judged. All from total strangers .

The laughs that MN has given me when I'm spending another lonely night on my own.

When my son was found dead by his brother I posted on MN in the early hours of the next morning because I needed to not feel alone.

People were lovely and supportive,' held' my hand, let me cry, rant, rage and vent. They talked me through his funeral and the scattering of his ashes. They ask me how we are.

They made us a beautiful woolly hug and sent me cards.

MN has been my lifeline and my solace over the last 9 months.

There is nowhere quite like this, I have always been a lurker but everyone reached out to me and gave me strength to keep going.

Sorry HelenMN but need to post this as I've wondered where to put it, no links I can particularly think off.

I alway think of MN being a bit like a large family (cheesy I know sorry grin )

Some of them upset you.

Most of them are fab with you.

Always some you can't stand or get on with at all.

Some you really "click" with & wish you could spend an evening with (or three) & several bottles of wine or cups of brew

Sometimes you are in tears of laughter <Yoni nonsense> or tears of sadness & awe at the bravery of posters & the support their predicament generates<Mia'smummy for one>

Bur however much we bicker or fall out ignore or slag off, when anyone "outside" attacks us we pull together & stand shoulder to shoulder and anyone else who dares criticise can fuck off to the far side etc etc !

I have seethed and applauded silently in equal measure this week at the barrage of attacks on MNHQ & the dignified way they have responded.

Bugger the lot of them, Justine & team you are all doing a fab job, keep the gin flowing, you'll be fine.

<punches arm in best jolly hockey sticks fashion as hugs aren't allowed>

<climbs off soapbox>

Stillcluelessat40 Fri 12-Apr-13 14:46:00

When I had ds2 and was struggling to bf the very first night in hospital, and was crying and not understanding what was going on - I didn't get the best support from my midwives, I got it by starting a thread on MN and almost immediately having lovely supportive advice from others who had been there too. I've started many other threads for help, but I always remember how "not alone" I felt that day, especially as compared to my pre-mumsnet days with ds1.

supergreenuk Fri 12-Apr-13 14:56:08

Worried55555 where her DP ha gone missing and feared he had done something stupid. The support and help with posting his picture in Facebook etc. I was glued to the thread willing for him to come home and praying for them. Happy ending but they have a tough road ahead.

PetiteRaleuse Fri 12-Apr-13 14:59:54

My postnatal group have kept me sane the last few months during some tough times.

The Bloggers' Network have also been a great source of support and entertainment.

Mumsnet generally gives you what you need at any given time: debate, strength, support, a laugh or a slap. And as of this week we all know where to go if we have a lonely yoni.

What more could one expect from just one website?

TheDoctrineOfSnatch Fri 12-Apr-13 15:01:14

YY Wilson re chickenpox.

cardamomginger Fri 12-Apr-13 15:08:46

Expat. [broken heart emoticon]
The support and compassion shown to me throughout my diagnosis with serious birth injuries and the operations I've had to repair these. Without the kindness of these wonderful women, I would have fallen apart. MN has been my lifeline. Thank you to all of you X

SilveryMoon Fri 12-Apr-13 15:14:00

The lovely things of Mumsnet.
I have personally been touched and overwhelmed byt he Christmas appeal. The kindness and thought from utter strangers is amazing. I've received in this appeal twice and both times it brought me to tears.
The thought, not to mention the money, that went into gifts that me and my family received was truly amazing.
The advice and support I've had on here over the years enabled me to get through times where I thought I just couldn't cope.
The friends I have made on here are some of the most special I have. They know me better than my RL friends and I feel I can talk about anything here.
The way that many posters just pull together when it's needed, the threads I've seen, th effort I've seen people go to on here for near strangers.

Poisonous bitches don't do that kind of thing. Poisonous bitches don't send Christmas Presents to strangers, just because they can. They don't knit blankets for families who have lost someone far too soon, they don't organise getting together and clearing out someone else's house because she's struggling. They don't make sure they return to threads when someone is going through a bad time to let them know they are there. They don't welcome people onto threads and new topics without question. These are not the actions of a bunch of vipers. These are just some of the actions of warm, kind, caring people who all know that everyone needs a shoulder or a helping hand every now and again.

BeQuicksieorBeDead Fri 12-Apr-13 15:23:16

SilveryMoon spot on

JaxTellerIsAllMine Fri 12-Apr-13 15:25:43

we are a lovely nest of vipers. This is one of my favourite cleanups

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1635701-Today-I-Am-Packing-A-Bag-And-Leaving donewithit]]

Also, the thread where TrinityRhino was at her wits end and a bunch of MNers went to her house to help her. And the thread where there was bed tag all through the country to get a bed for her DD. grin

All the relationship threads where the best advice is given - not always LTB.

JaxTellerIsAllMine Fri 12-Apr-13 15:26:01
talktastic Fri 12-Apr-13 15:32:32

I don't come on the site very often and this is only my second post as I'm very good at putting my foot in it and have learnt to hold back or I will stress about offending anyone, but I love the news roundup I get by email - it really does genuinely make me LOL (and I'm far too old to be using that phrase). It makes me feel I'm in a sisterhood of seriously witty, clever, genuine and friendly mothers and even if I don't agree with everything I read I think this is a fab place to come and is certainly making my day more pleasant as I sit in waiting for British Gas to turn up - although the reruns of Top Gear on Dave ja Vu this morning were the day's highlight!

Habbibu Fri 12-Apr-13 15:35:25

I think MN in invaluable in many ways - it's so big that there's always someone who's been through what you are. When I had a molar pregnancy and was feeling very low, having lost dd1 a couple of years before, I had a fantastic cheerleading squad throughout my follow up, who did lots to allay the indignity of sticking my piss in a postbox on a regular basis... Also remember aitch MNing from hospital when wee dd2 arrived very early. YY to spookycharlotte, and the house cleaning thread. And funnymummy(?)'s "radical feminist visitors" when in a psychiatric hospital.

And i had a lovely PM from an MNer who was offering support now that my dd has alopecia - it's just invaluable.

BeebiesQueen Fri 12-Apr-13 15:36:12

I remember so many of these threads and am loving re remembering them again. The kindness and support is why in my darkest times I turn to Mumsnet and why I stick around during the good times to give advice myself.

Mumsnet is the place you can rant, cry, scream and shout with out fear of judgement. With out a doubt there will be someone at the end of a computer who has felt the same, has gone through similar and can be a listening ear to say, there is a light and I am it, I have been through it and am still living.

I've met some of my best friends on Mumsnet and hope to continue using Mumsnet for many many years to come.

I LOVE Mumsnet and its wonderful, kind and caring members.

PseudoBadger Fri 12-Apr-13 15:46:16

Oh gosh I've just read EMIN's thread and am crying - what an amazing story.

FairyJen Fri 12-Apr-13 15:47:59

In RL I'm very isolated. I live 400 miles ( I think) from family and dp works looonnnnggg hours. I'd never admit it but I'm very lonely.

I come on mnet and suddenly there is a whole community there to talk to, laugh with and cry with. Suddenly I'm no longer lonely.

In particular for me there are the frequent posters of the sweary thread. I've had pm's with offers of support, both practical and financial as well as emotional an most of all they give me a blooming good laugh!

I realise I sound really soppy blush but I genuinely would feel utterly alone if it wasn't for you guys!

On another note I want a knitted viper! grin

Gerrof Fri 12-Apr-13 15:48:56

Without wanting to sound like a monumental twat, the way MNHQ is part of the community <retch> is pretty impressive.

It's a business and yet they generally respond to complaints and concerns about their commercial aspects.

And they manage the really hard task of moderating etc when required with good cheer.

StrawberriesTasteLikeLipsDo Fri 12-Apr-13 15:50:05

I met some great friends through here. We call ourselves the wagoners an have been chatting since 2007! We have met and support each other.

Also the support shown to expat, trazzle and the teaset - the fact that calling a family the teaset garners recognition here.. Its all testimony to the fact that whilst no punches are pulled here, support is here when needed.

Gerrof Fri 12-Apr-13 15:50:29

I think MN is so important especially in this modern world where a lot of people relocate every 5 minutes and can end up somewhere miles away from family and friends at an age where it is so difficult to meet new people.

I am very happy that my finding MN coincided with my moving miles away and going from a couple of close friendships to having nobody to talk to within a 4 hour drive.

I've been on the receiving end of so much loveliness from Mumsnet, I hardly know where to begin.

When school first raised that they thought DS had problems and all the way through until he was ultimately diagnosed with Autism, the SEN support boards were absolutely wonderful and gave me so much support, it made what was a heartbreaking situation much easier to deal with.

The atrocious cunt who when my DH lost his job and I was too ill to work, sent me a Sainsburys's shop complete with a wine box. She doesn't even live in the same country as me.

The wonderfull MNers who donate to the xmas appeal. The presents for my children in some small way made what had been an awful year for them end on a brighter note.

The biggest thing was the support I got as I slowly went mad with a total breakdown from a long running thread here that supported me until I went into hospital I'm having a crisis moment to the thread where I was so scared I was going to harm myself, but people talked to me until I got through to the crisis team and the drugs kicked in. Is anyone there

That was a dark time and a very, very dark night. I don't know what I would have done without MNers that night.

I've done forums for years. Never have I found anywhere as supportive, caring and fun as Mumsnet. Never have I made so many friends as I have here. If I lost my MN friends, I'd have to delete half my facebook contacts, but they're not just virtual friends any more. They are living, breathing people who I meet up with and who are part of my life.

MN also brought to me my bezzie mate EverybodyKnows. So for that alone, I love MN.

drfayray Fri 12-Apr-13 15:52:36

When my ex left me and I just wanted to die, MN saved me. The wonderful support from women going through the same thing was so helpful. The kindness and advice as well as the laughs.
Give me vipers any day grin

snice Fri 12-Apr-13 15:53:53

Everyone else has linked to lots of other great threads but what I would like to say in addition is that I think MN has made me a nicer,more tolerant person. It gives me unparalleled access to women from all walks of life with all sorts of dilemmas and challenges that wouldn't have crossed my radar otherwise. I think reading about their lives has forced me to face up to the fact that some of my beliefs and opinions were nonsense!

Gerrof Fri 12-Apr-13 15:54:41

What was that story where a mumsnetter was stuck in Italy (or somewhere) because of the Icelandic dust cloud and she moaned about it on mumsnet, and a mumsnetter put her and her kids up for a week or so?

And even though it was a troll, it is very kind to think that someone put themselves out enough to take some clean knickers to someone who shat themselves in the loo at Waterloo station.

snice Fri 12-Apr-13 15:54:59

Everyone else has linked to lots of other great threads but what I would like to say in addition is that I think MN has made me a nicer,more tolerant person. It gives me unparalleled access to women from all walks of life with all sorts of dilemmas and challenges that wouldn't have crossed my radar otherwise. I think reading about their lives has forced me to face up to the fact that some of my beliefs and opinions were nonsense!

snice Fri 12-Apr-13 15:55:45

I felt so strongly I said it twice!

Gerrof Fri 12-Apr-13 15:56:36

drfay your thread was inspirational.

And agree snice MN has made me a nicer person. I have no knowledge of SN children (for example) in RL and what people have to deal with day to day, MN has been a real eye opener in that regard.

Here you go positive press right there! This is the February Baby Bus of 2012, and we all have 40 odd new best friends thanks to Mumsnet!

melliebobs Fri 12-Apr-13 16:15:22

And a fantastic 1st birthday it was too! smile

ThePskettiIncident Fri 12-Apr-13 16:20:03

Southsea's amazing threads in pregnancy. Her waters broke at 28 weeks whilst on holiday in America. MN kept her company while she was stuck in bed overseas for months. It was incredible to read the advice and support offered.

Lots of the others have been mentioned. The recent de cluttering/ house cleaning one really stuck with me.

5madthings Fri 12-Apr-13 16:22:09

Oooh ooh oh the Nananaps threw ads, her first one was done under another name, andhow she shared the shock of being pregnant and the stress and worry and anxiousness she felt having had multiple miscarriages. The hand holding along the way as each s an showed a bean and a heartbeat etc and finally the birth if her baby boy smile

I was honored she shared her journey and I know it gave a lot of mnetters hope that miracles happen against all odds. And I know Nana appreciated the hand holding smile

5madthings Fri 12-Apr-13 16:22:30

Threads..not threw ads!

ScrambledSmegs Fri 12-Apr-13 16:26:28

I think MN is fab. It's broadened my mind and made me open to new experiences (except on Friday nights, no way jose) and I feel like it's made me a better person. Weirdly I'm more trusting, not less, despite some less than genuine posters.

The most lovely thread I've seen recently is one I can't/won't link to, but that actually is another reason I love MN. You've set up a special section for sensitive threads, and made it unsearchable. Recognising the need for that, and the fact that it's respected as a safe area is fantastic.

I had so much support from some lovely people over on the conception boards, especially when we received some news that we thought meant no more children for us (luckily we beat the odds). One lovely MNer sent me a load of washable nappies for DD2. I've also gone to collect a maternity dress from central London to send to an MNer elsewhere in the country, when she couldn't find it in a store nearer to here.

It's the little things that add up to a kind, supportive, wonderful whole.

5madthings Fri 12-Apr-13 16:31:17
Wishiwasanheiress Fri 12-Apr-13 16:32:44

I've posted under 2 names. One for each dd. With dd1 in 2010 I was floundering as a new mum. There were many times where without the advice from those in "feed the world - bf/bottle" I would have been quite lost. My first birth was awful and I was in shock for weeks and overwhelmed and felt truly sorry for myself the support advice and faith I received from others that I could do it, would do it was immense. I can't speak for others but having someone available 24/7 saved my bacon. I'm sure I'd have been pnd without them.

With dd2 recently I've posted all over the shop in response to others and my own questions. I hope ive helped others as ive been helped in the past. Mn broadens my views, keeps me current and educates me.

Those who only see negatives have very small minds. Plainly why they only see the bad. There's an awful lot of good here. And I'm very grateful to it.

ParsingFancy Fri 12-Apr-13 16:35:01

Here's one of the recent life-saving threads: Heart attack symptoms? Or just me being silly...?

Hope wrinklyraisin won't mind me posting it. And I know TheHumanCatapult ("the MNer who couldn't pee") was another life saved by MN.

I'm mostly housebound from M.E./CFS and when I found MN was mostly bed-and-sofa-bound. So MN has been a lifesaver for me in a different way. It's my window on the world. I post little, as have limited energy, but read very much more. It's helped me keep in touch with what being human means, which can easily sink from sight when you're alone with your failing body for days on end.

Hassled Fri 12-Apr-13 16:37:29

What Snice said - I'm also a much nicer, more tolerant person than I ever used to be, and it's because MN has given me the opportunity to see the bigger picture. It's given me perspective on life.

It's also given me the only chances I've ever really had to talk about the loss of my parents. When I got to the age my mother was when she died, I had a bit of a wobble - and the kindness and compassion and understanding that was just given to me (and it did feel like a gift) by random internet strangers meant a huge amount.

5madthings Fri 12-Apr-13 16:39:47

There was also a thread ages ago where lots of us shared stories of pnd and how we had got well again to help others. I don't remember where it was posted and I think I was on there as 4madboys I didn't start the thread tho.

ExitPursuedByYoniBear Fri 12-Apr-13 16:41:27

Agree with snice and Hassled

I love you all wink

Ledkr Fri 12-Apr-13 16:42:02

When my baby was born with a cleft palate became jaundiced and developed pneumonia I was terrified she would die and stayed with her every second.
When she was about two weeks old I left her on the hospital for one night with dh and came home to shower and sleep.
I felt so alone and desperate that I couldn't stop crying and posted on mn for support.
What I got back was support that I will never forget.
From just people sending their best wishes to knowledgable people who have me advice and reassurance.
I was able to rest and go back to the hospital ready to help her fight.
She is two now and people will seriously never know how dark I felt that night and how much their words helped me in the dead if night when everyone else was asleep.
Thank you so much.

exoticfruits Fri 12-Apr-13 16:44:40

All these stories are lovely, and true. I personally have been helped by a poster.
Unfortunately there are the two sides and you can find plenty of the negative too.
I am somewhat haunted by a terrible story in 'bereavement' on Tuesday- as far as I know I was the only person to reply and the poster asked for her thread to be deleted- which was done. I so wish that she had got the replies and if she were to read this she would probably be in tears because she didn't get the wonderful support that people are saying they had. She posted early in the morning and poured her heart out. I only replied because I couldn't bear to see it ignored and then bumped it up in the hopes that someone more helpful would see it. I was so concerned I contacted MNHQ but there is nothing to be done. I feel that we let her down. Had MN been around when I was newly bereaved I am not sure that I would have used it for support, you could end up feeling more lonely and lost than you did in the first place.
I think there should be more demarcation between support and debate.
e.g. if a woman wants support on going back to work early she wants practical suggestions and not to be told that she shouldn't be going back to work. This doesn't mean that you can't have 'robust' debate - but in a different place.
Maybe MN has just grown so large that it is time to think of altering it slightly so that women can get support and have abstract arguments but not on the same thread.

Maryz Fri 12-Apr-13 16:45:40

This place has literally kept me sane over the last few years which have been tough.

It is the one place where I know that no matter what happens I will find non-judgemental support.

And it is the one place where I know that I can find someone to talk to, no matter what time of day or night it is.

I honestly think that being a part of the Mumsnet talk boards means you are never really on your own.

JakeBullet Fri 12-Apr-13 16:54:14

Several years ago when DS was about 3-4 he desperately wanted a Baby Annabel doll. Reluctant to spend a vast amount of money on a doll he would play with for about six months before abandoning I posted about it here for advice. A lovely MNer whose daughter had several Baby Annabel dolls...and was getting yet another for Xmas asked her DD if she would part with one of her old ones for DS and sent it to me. I sent her DD £5 back for some nice treats. DS is now 10 and we still have Baby Annabel although these days she sits in my room. Recently I decided to dress her up and bought her an outfit in the sale at the toy shop...she looks lovely and DS took a whole new interest (but don't tell him I've told you that)

So thank you to that lovely MNer, we have really enjoyed and appreciated the lovely doll and she is still loved seven years on.

I could name lots of lovely things about MN if I sit and think,

the time someone was suicidal and made a suicide attempt, MNers worked out where she lived, got her help and did a collection for her afterwards.

The time an MNer quite obviously had an ectopic pregnancy her doctors had missed.....everyone pushed her to go back....and we were right. Again there was a collection for her to help ease her recovery.

Missy whose husband had a heart transplant....had lots of support from the site and some money collected went towards a family holiday for them.

The Xmas parcel thing which I have never taken part in but keep meaning to.

The blankets which are crafted for MNers who have had to go through the death of a child.

All these things missed by the journalists.

FattyMcChubster Fri 12-Apr-13 16:58:04

I'm so glad this thread has been started. I love mumsnet. Yes, you get a lot of negative but you get that everywhere and as long as people can rise above (and not throw too many buns) then things are fine.

I name changed a while back as I was so embarrassed about a problem I had. It literally took all my courage to start a thread but I was so desperate and in a really really dark place. The responses I got and the help I found literally saved me. I was considering 'other options' as things had got so bad but some amazing people helped me through and I'll never ever forget that.
I wouldn't have been able to reach out in rl so having mumsnet really helped.

You lot have literally changed my life, for the better.
Thanks thankswine <soppy emoticon>

Feeling better yet Helen & co? grin

Have a good w/e & hope you all get a little sunshine.

HelenMumsnet (MNHQ) Fri 12-Apr-13 17:00:04

Bossybritches22

*Feeling better yet Helen & co?* grin

Have a good w/e & hope you all get a little sunshine.

<sob>

<in a nice way>

TheDoctrineOfSnatch Fri 12-Apr-13 17:01:09

Lots of practical advice on the London 2012 threads about travel options, buggy parks etc.

changeforthebetter Fri 12-Apr-13 17:02:50

The people who answered my thread during this horrible week when I posted for advice on my daughter's health, particularly because there are MH issues and RL people would never be so open. Outweighs any viperishness (though I suspect that is more to do with general discomfort with wimmin having strong opinions and having the gall to express them).

<passes Helen MN tissues>

<better still large gin>

We need a tissue emoticon sometimes !

EmpressOfThe7OceansLovesMN Fri 12-Apr-13 17:09:18

New name, look <twirls>
I'd never have met the rest of the Puddlehumpers without MN & the support & understanding & sheer fun I've had from them has been wonderful. Also what snice said about becoming more tolerant.

I'm sorry about that other poster though, exoticfruits sad

Alibabaandthe40nappies Fri 12-Apr-13 17:11:49

People have all mentioned the big things.

For me personally it was that MN was such a massive source of support when I had PND after I had DS1 - especially all the lovely ladies from the Slatterns/Procrastinators thread, past and present.

Alibabaandthe40nappies Fri 12-Apr-13 17:21:13

exotic sad I hope she is finding some comfort somewhere else.

PiratePanda Fri 12-Apr-13 17:27:29

I'm particularly impressed by the barristers and solicitors who give their time and advice for free on the legal issues board, the doctors and nurses on the health boards, not to mention the planning officers on that epic thread about the illegal house gym being built in a neighbours' backyard. But the general support and hand-holding for those going through incredibly difficult times in their personal lives - divorces, deaths, sick family members - is also amazing. MN, by and large, is a force for good and for hope in the world.

Sat here waiting for next viewing, the feels oddly quiet. Do you guys put music on?

everlong Fri 12-Apr-13 17:36:34

Personally MN helped me immensely after my eldest ds Oliver committed suicide. Posters on the bereavement section literally kept my head above water.
I know that sounds weird but because a lot of mothers themselves were also bereaved they knew what I was feeling, what I was going through whereas people in RL just expected me to be over it very soon.

I have also seen other posters benefit from some wonderful support in many different situations. Something I haven't witnessed in other forums.

This is a good place. Ran by fabulous people.

LtEveDallas Fri 12-Apr-13 17:38:03

MN helped me through the early days with the incredible non sleeping baby (no more than 2 hours at a time for the first 4 months!), TikTok kept me breast feeding when I was ready to give up (but desperately wanted to carry on), the BOM ladies kept me sane when DSD was playing up (and 4 years on we have a great relationship) and my MMC was correctly diagnosed after I posted a "TMI" thread in chat.

I was also helped through the awfulness of my near split with DH and was able to come through it stronger, more confident and with a clearer vision of the way ahead for us, that 4 years on is still working.

I've been a part of sending cash, food, desert combats (!), postcards and stamps to MNers and their families.

I've been able to provide specific 'military' guidance to worried mums and spouses and I'm proud to have joined, and persuaded DH to join the Anthony Nolan Bone Marrow Register.

Oh and thanks to the MN Product Testing of the Phillips 'Man Iron' DH now spends Sunday afternoons doing the weeks ironing - I haven't had to iron ANYTHING for over a year shock grin. That alone is worth my MN Membership grin and thanks

I HATE all the negativity in the press about MN. Dickheads come on here, spend half an hour in AIBU and think that is all there is. They don't spend any time getting to know the site or seeing all the good it does.

MN has helped me, educated me, made me more tolerant and understanding and allows me to mix happily with hundreds of people across a HUGE spectrum. From SAHMs to Doctors to Lawyers, people struggling on benefits to those who own Islands! Where else can you get that?

TiredFeet Fri 12-Apr-13 17:50:57

I have personally found so much support here through all the ups and downs of the past few years: helpful, sage and practical advice from the employment board when I was dealing with bullying at work, support and friendship on the conception threads when I struggled to conceive, support and sympathy (and distraction) when I did conceive and promptly suffered from hyperemesis, great friends on the ante natal threads, practical advice and much sympathy and wise words since Ds arrived (non-sleeping baby threads, breastfeeding, severe eczema and allergies...)
And now I am back almost at the beginning again, getting wonderful support and advice on the hyperemesis support thread, and making new friends on the ante natal thread
Plus of course through the long nights of breastfeeding, and the long lonely days of hyperemesis, I am enjoying the diversion of all the funny mumsnet threads...
And I hope that sometimes I have added words of support that have helped someone in some small way

There are amazing supportive threads on here every day, and they far outnumber the bitchy ones. And often it is hard to realise the humour behind 'bitchy' comments once they are lifted out of context and placed in an article (for e.g.)

JammyDodger1 Fri 12-Apr-13 18:08:10

Mn has been such a support to me over the last year and a bit, making me laugh and cry in many ways, I have been astounded at the support given, one in particular I remember that a mum was stuck at home and needed calpol desperately, and someone took some round for her.
On a personal note dd1 has just entered teens and its been a rocky road to say the least, but I have had support with all aspects of that, from her pretending to self harm and drink bleach to her being wonderful but messy!
And dd2 had a rubbish birthday, being ill on the day, combined with being ill at Christmas she was feeling really low but has a full thread from all over the world of birthday wishes and poems and songs and she still look at that thread and sings the songs!

Anything and everything is discussed here and under the watchful eye of MNHQ.
perhaps some other sites should take heed of how things are run on here and maybe then internet bullying and other horrid things can be policed better.

Wonderful site.

exoticfruits Fri 12-Apr-13 18:09:56

I think the problem is the way the site is set out.
I don't bookmark it. I google mumsnet and go in through AIBU - which is very prominent and certainly shows the angry side ( journalists may not get beyond it) I have a quick look to see if there is anything interesting. I then log in. I go to threads I am on, see what has been added and respond. I will go on responding until it dies or I get bored, whichever happens first - about 50/50.
Next I scroll down last 15mins and see what takes my interest and that is usually it. Often I never get beyond 'threads I am on'. If it all seems boring I will go to unanswered questions and as a last resort education or primary education and that is it.
It does lead me to wade in occasionally with opinions that I would be better keeping to myself.
It does sadden me on the 'last 15 mins' to see people's life in turmoil next to utter trivia.
I think that the first impression through AIBU is poor and not representative, but it is all some people see if they google.
If you didn't get taken straight there and you had to search topics rather than last 15 mins I think you would lose a lot of the worst element.
And if I was brave enough to post about a very personal subject I wouldn't want to see it next to things like 'should workmen use your loo'. They should both be there,but they don't mix.

PortBlacksandsVipersTavern Fri 12-Apr-13 18:14:38

I love MN - have been here since 2007 (also used to frequent Lizzie's shop and the Baaaar grin).
Apart from the obvious threads (has anyone mentioned the 'getting milk late in the evening for someone who suddenly acquired a baby' thread yet? - there is also the feeling that all human life is here - and i had no experience of why anyone would (for example) want a homebirth or want to extended breastfeed - let alone what it was like day to day for those with DCs with SN. That alone has helped me to help my DSis.

exoticfruits Fri 12-Apr-13 18:21:07

The other trouble is that you can't keep up with it all. I have just been told that the bereavement post on Tues that upset me had another duplicate that people responded to and I didn't see- so it has a much happier outcome than I thought.

I would say the biggest thank you to the Brookers, we have 3 threads the ttc's the grads and the post grads. Without the support of the ladies of the brookers I would have crumpled under the pressure of continuing ttc. No subject is taboo, they are only ever a message away and I can't say in words how grateful I am. I am a grad of the brookers (due next week) and they still support me, and me them. We have ladies going through assisted conception and we all take each step of that together with a hand hold or a wet fish slap when needed. Every Brooking birth is celebrated by everyone, no jealousy or animosity just unwavering support. It doesn't stop there, after you have your baby and become a post grad you get the most wonderful advice and honest opinions from other post grads but even those who had their little ones months and even a year ago still stand side by side with everyone else to congratulate every BFP. That is the best way I have to say it, but it is not enough!

There is one more I want to say. 2 years ago my teen was diagnosed deaf/blind due to Usher syndrome. I tried and tried to come to terms with it myself, it was so hard. I found myself one night writing a post reaching out for help and advice with no expectation (I had never heard of Usher I didn't expect anyone else to have either) but I had the most wonderful replies and a pm off one MNr who put me in touch with a support group for Usher syndrome where I was picked up, dusted down and supported. I am still involved with the support group now helping other newly diagnosed usher children and supporting/getting support from other families living with it. I would never have found them without MN

Naebother Fri 12-Apr-13 18:24:36

Couldn't do without mn.
Support on here is immense.

Mn has got me through my mums funeral, ivf and marriage issues to mention a few things in the 5 years I've been on here.

Plus it's a right laugh most of the time.

Gerrof Fri 12-Apr-13 18:25:52

Oh and I got a bloody 1700 quid fridge freezer courtesy of mumsnet. I mean Jesus Christ!

coorong Fri 12-Apr-13 18:30:08

The tamoxifen thread - when I was diagnosed and now treated for breast cancer. The most pragmatic, sensible and sensitive group of women.

MN is like being in the company of the wisest, kindest, funniest friends who are never tired, never bored and endlessly inventive.
I have made lovely friends here, cried over children I never met,laughed myself silly and even found a spectacular member of staff

I particularly love the 'hive mind' which can come up with a solution to a problem, tell you whether YABU, dress you, feed you, improve your sex life and help you buy kitchen appliances.

And of course I love the generosity and support, from the major projects like Billie's Blankets, to tiny things like someone being there in the middle of the night when you are in pain or worried.

It is more than just a website, a forum or 'words on a screen'. It is a proper, real community and I thank you all for allowing me to be part of it.

flowers

But I don't own any Uggs. sad

coorong Fri 12-Apr-13 18:31:38

Oh, and the nicknames - you couldn't make them up!

ClaraOswinOswald Fri 12-Apr-13 18:38:00

There are so many good things about Mumsnet, here are just a few.

The generosity of Mumsnetters is a wonderful thing. I've seen so many kind of offers of practical help, food, baby stuff, toys, lifts, somewhere to stay, etc.

When I had a lump in my breast I received so much support that I really needed as I had no-one to discuss my fears with in real life.

The kind words and just knowing people were there when my dad died.

I bloody love this nest of vipers.

Grockle Fri 12-Apr-13 18:44:39

I can't tell you all the wonderful things about Mumsnet, there are just too many to write about. I remember in my early days, 'watching' misdee's DH have his transplant and waiting, with baited breath, for the post to say he was ok. I remember the 'Peter's pink' post so well. Never before had I felt so connected & worried about a family I'd never met. All these women, like me, who'd never met Peter & probably never would, sitting, waiting for news. And now, years later, I still think about that. Other tragedies too - Yorkiegirl's DH, Expat's beautiful DD, ggglimpo's Maude... so many awful things that made so many of us pull together and lead to such long lasting friendships.

There's all the lovely happy things too, the day-to day stuff. And obviously the Christmas appeal. I've donated in the past and, for the first time, was nominated last year. I was so touched... it had been a truly awful year and it made my day to know that someone had noticed & thought of us enough to nominate us. And then the kind soul who spent their money and sent a gift for my family which is truly cherished. I often think about that - the kindness of a random stranger.

More personally, mumsnet has been a life-saver. Literally. It has been there through my horrendous divorce, an awful custody battle, serious mental health problems and chronic illness. I honestly don't know where I'd be without the support and advice of MNers. There's always someone here who will be able to offer helpful advice or who will just keep me company & chat to me in the wee small hours when then rest of the world is sleeping & only the insomniacs or people with small babies are about.

I know that there'll always be someone on Mumsnet who will know the answer to my dull questions about which steam cleaner to buy or where to get decent bed linen or slightly odd questions that google cannot help me with. There will always be someone who has been in a similar situation & makes you feel less bonkers by admitting it grin

I'm not in a good way at the moment & it's hard for me to gather my thoughts and type, so this is not eloquent (although I did try to check my spelling, use paragraphs and no text speak wink). I deactivated my FB account yesterday but have had 8 MNers contact me to see if I am ok. What's that, if not a caring community? Honestly, for all the high-profile bitchiness, trolls and negative stories that are picked up on in the media, there must be hundred of positive things that go unreported.

I am a long-time MNer & have no plans to leave. Certain MNers have become some of my very good friends in RL & I am thankful for everything.

AND, The Fonz spoke to me first in his webchat and Yotam Ottolenghi answered my question & wished me well. Hurrah! grin

MN helped me to see that I was not the only one finding it tough with a new born and a broken down episiotomy. I learned how to have a pain free wee and since then I've been entertained daily by this amazing gathering of funny and clever women. Makes me a bit cross seeing mumsnet bad mouthed in the press really. I think it's wonderful. And you can do swears.

RatherBeOnThePiste Fri 12-Apr-13 18:53:10

Mumsnet Lovelies?

The Woolly Hugs crew - the most inspirational, compassionate and generous hearted bunch of folk who never fail to amaze, at home and from as far away as New Zealand, Thailand, Middle East, Canada, all corners of the globe.

They genuinely care so much for others, they give up time, money and energy because they want to help. You won't always see it either, it's not done for show. They never shy away from things that are difficult or challenging - actually look at what Woolly Hugs does, it's not easy.
It just shows how many wonderful people there are here, who go out of their way to be kind, restores your faith in humanity it does. Lots of photos of things lovely folk have made here

This from one of our recipients..

In our darkest days true love and compassion came from others whom we have yet to know but feel I can call friends

Nest of vipers? My arse, and I feel very protective. Mumsnet is a proper community with a heart of gold. Occasional spiky edges, yes, but its heart couldn't be bigger or beat more strongly.

I love the way that MNers go out of their way to help and make a difference in big, important and scary situations. But I also like when they go out of their way to help with something seemingly unimportant or trivial that makes a huge difference, often to DCs.

I particularly enjoyed the saga of the family tuna where MNers sourced and kitted out a soft toy caterpillar to fit with a lovely story invented by a DC so said her toy caterpillar's Dad was away fighting a war. Said caterpillar then hitched a ride on Santa's sleigh complete with parachute.

There was another pre Christmas thread where a poster had tried to get her 3 DC matching Spiderman onsies from a supermarket. She had managed to get two but the third was out of stock and Mners from all over searched their local stores until one was found.

Tweasels Fri 12-Apr-13 18:55:35

Whenever I need any help with ANYTHING be it sensitive personal stuff or unimportant stuff like getting static out of a dress just before a wedding. I come here.

My mum died 8 years ago when DC1 was 6 months old. All the questions I imagine I should be asking her, I ask (or search the archive) here.

Mumsnet has literally become my mum.

Datun Fri 12-Apr-13 19:02:30

Oh. Dear. God. Still new to Mumsnet (second day). Is it always like this?? These women could move mountains, conquer the globe, wipe out war (and start some). In my head I have a marvellous fantasy experiment of the Cabinet being made up of MN women. It would only take a week. And this was merely from one thread about Yoni massage...

Sparklingbrook Fri 12-Apr-13 19:05:57

Nickelbabe's live birth thread was brilliant. Well it spanned 4 threads in the end I think. Everyone willing her on. smile

RatherBeOnThePiste Fri 12-Apr-13 19:08:13

In for another....

Really kind hearted folk sending all sorts of stuff from bedding to uniforms and baby stuff. stuff they no longer need, but others do.

The amazing support on the weight-loss threads - just awesome

The amazing support on running threads, this a Woolly Hugs one but there are so many others, all brilliant, here

Thank you to Mumsnet for all the inspiring and simply fabulous friends I have made who are now good friends in real life too.

For finding fellow gin lovers! Huzzah! I was alone in my love for gin until I found you MNHQ [hearts]

I may well be back......

Sparklingbrook Fri 12-Apr-13 19:09:28

And the clinging together when children go on school trips to forrin parts Piste. smile

RatherBeOnThePiste Fri 12-Apr-13 19:10:23

Oh yes, bless you and bless Boppard Xx

RatherBeOnThePiste Fri 12-Apr-13 19:10:44

How will we be when they leave home??

RatherBeOnThePiste Fri 12-Apr-13 19:11:09

We'll do it together Sparkling wine wine

BIWI Fri 12-Apr-13 19:11:49

You'll only be back for the gin, Pistey ...

Sparklingbrook Fri 12-Apr-13 19:13:41

Yes we will Piste. wine (For anyone wondering both my DS and Piste's DS went to Boppard, Germany on separate school trips-and actually came back!)

We believe Boppard is still standing........

BOF Fri 12-Apr-13 19:15:50

I posted this week about feeling fucking suicidally depressed low, and I was overwhelmed with kindness and support. And today the postman delivered a book (which is why this is my first visit to MN today!) of Nancy Mitford's letters and a couple of DVDs from the famous and original atrocious cunt GetOrf. She is an angel of loveliness, and like so many of you here, the heart in a heartless world. Thank you thanks.

SeaShellsMyDogTrulySmells Fri 12-Apr-13 19:17:03

I came to MN after a miscarriage to try and make sense of it all, as I was struggling to talk about it in RL.

MN supported me through my two children's pregnancies, births, babyhood whilst I fought PND, and toddlersoms whilst I dealt with cards I hadn't foreseen being dealt.

On top of it all (all the tears/laughter/wisdom/debates/whimsical wonder threads) I found 11 wonderful women who are now very dear friends in RL on here, through a mutual love of canvas tents (sad drunkards that we are ;) )

People who just drop in miss the wonderful gems. In every pub there is the loud mouthed bore who everyone hopes will pass out soon so everyone else can get on with a fab night out - here AIBU is that twat, the rest of it is a wonderful place grin

SeaShellsMyDogTrulySmells Fri 12-Apr-13 19:19:06

I used the word wonder too many times in that post

MNHQ you get the drift wink

The generosity of mners never ceases to amaze me - not just with materials things but also with their time and expertise, advice given freely

I wonder whether part of the problem is that many high-profile people who liked mumsnst would be unlikely to publicise that fact as they would draw attention to the fact that they're on the site and would risk their anonymity and privacy

I'm no one important and despite the fact I think MN is fab I don't go around telling anyone because I want to maintain privacy on here

RatherBeOnThePiste Fri 12-Apr-13 19:27:30

I'd like to mention the huge support given to mums and families with poorly children in hospital, like trazzles, always folk ready to help. listen and hand hold and there are so many threads like this. I saw someone mentioned clutchingpearls earlier. Mumsnetters don't give up on folk, they don't post and forget, they stay, and they are around at all times of the day and night. Love and support, fabulous bloody vipers they are.

How many are turns are we allowed Helen? smile wine

<retrieves gin>

Sparklingbrook Fri 12-Apr-13 19:28:29

Not forgetting the lovely PMs that get sent and received.

alexpolismum Fri 12-Apr-13 19:33:33

MN has been a real lifeline. I have got advice on my son's SN, people have been supportive through all the difficult times we've had with the crisis, even the "poor you, hope it gets better soon" messages mean something. One lovely Mumsnetter has sent me quite a large number of books, all the way to Greece, it must have cost her a lot in postage!

The lovely first language Welsh speakers on the Welsh threads offering their time to help learners and give advice, tips, make corrections.

Sometimes, the most important thing about MN is the humour. Sometimes, lightheartedness is exactly what you need and you can always find it on MN!

BellaVita Fri 12-Apr-13 19:35:57

Some beautiful lovely Mner's sent me a gorgeous bouquet of flowers and a bottle of champagne just after New Year. DH had been poorly in hospital between 16th December to the 5th Jan. it was very much appreciated and a fab welcome home for DH.

DS1 rang me when I was on the way to the hospital to pick DH up and said "I think some mumsnetter's have been at it, at least that's who i think x x x x and x is! You have a delivery" grin.

It is a lovely lovely feeling to be thought about..

TeamEdward Fri 12-Apr-13 19:36:51

The TSA are a tower of strength. We first came together over mutual inappropriate lust and now, 80+ threads on, we are true friends.
Relationship issues, employment woes, conception, pregnancy, birth, child rearing, weaning onto cheesestrings and custard creams, SN support & advice, MH issues, bereavement, sharing stories to read, writing and editing help & advice - I think we've discussed every other MN topic too! We've even had a Twislutters writing published.
We meet at least twice a year, and I so look forward to these times when we can convert the virtual hugs into genuine ones.

TeamEdward Fri 12-Apr-13 19:39:50

I meant to add that I have deep seated self-esteem issues, and Mumsnet has been a real lifeline for being able to talk anonymously to people when I couldn't bear to look anyone in the face.

Unfortunatelyanxious Fri 12-Apr-13 19:47:33

I have had amazing help on the MH boards, I would like to think I have helped others there as well.

The help given to women fleeing DV situations is valid and life saving.

I have also loved some of the totally daft threads with people joking around. I don't tend to post on them but when your unwell they are a tonic.

ThreadPirateFanjoBeard Fri 12-Apr-13 19:49:19

I wish I'd found MN when I was PG and a new parent. The support I had here when DS was DX with autism got me through those first few weeks. Strangely, it was easier to talk to you vipers lot than my friends. I'm a regular NCger in case anyone is thinking 'who the jeff is she?'

Convert Fri 12-Apr-13 19:52:13

I have been in tears reading some of the threads here. There was one about a MNer who's friend was having cancer treatment and was feeling very ill. The friend was home somewhere in London and the OP was in Scotland. Within a couple of hours the power of MN had got some piriton put through the friends letter box, which would help with the side effects.
A few weeks ago I read a thread about helping homeless people, buying them something to eat etc. Today I was out shopping and walk past this poor bloke, sitting in the freezing cold. I went and bought a cup of tea for him and he was so pleased and grateful. I have never even considered doing that before but MN inspired me to want to do something nice.
Obviously not a patch on the things that people have done but I would say that being on here has changed my views a little, and made me a bit more compassionate.

Shellington Fri 12-Apr-13 19:53:16

I just wanted to say that, in addition to a lot of the lovely things here, I think there is an awful lot that you will never hear about and that people won't want to share here - for anonymity, to respect the privacy of others and because there are a lot of MNers who don't see what they doing as being especially kind / good / helpful - they just are those things anyway.

I have a couple of specific examples in mind, but can't post here, obviously wink

But just wanted to post a little nod to those quietly going about their good deeds, sharing goodwill and making the world a little more beautiful - good effort thanks

The fact that MN is a platform / vehicle for those things is a testament to those who run it, too wine <-- gin

Portofino Fri 12-Apr-13 19:54:08

I have made some lovely friends via MN both in Belgium and in the UK. A lifesaver for a potentially lonely expat. So many lovely threads, I remember many mentioned above. also DreadPirate and her DH who went to the rescue of an abused MNetter, got her to a safe place with her children and organised a collection of clothes/ household stuff so she could start anew. I often wonder how they are all doing now.

The Xmas appeal and the absolutely lovely and gorgeous woolly hugs crew, some of whom I have had the privilege to meet in RL. And another bunch of awful fishwives who have welcomed me to their bosoms.

I love MN!

Tee2072 Fri 12-Apr-13 20:02:42

How can anyone not love this place? They are obviously reading a different MN to the one I participate on.

Everything everyone else has mentioned from the XMas appeal to the Woolly Hugs.

And the time I was sent a PM asking for my address because I had posted what a shit time I was having and a Chocowakka thing cake arrived in the past a few days later. I can't even remember her user name and I am not sure we've spoken before or since.

You lovely wonderful nest of vipers.

Maryz Fri 12-Apr-13 20:05:56

I think you are right there Shellington - there are many more good things that happen via Mumsnet that people don't really talk about.

For example, how many people have donated blood or signed up for organ donation because of MrsDeVere's Billie? How many people have had their eyes opened to the difficulties of those with SN? How many people would now fold their buggies on a bus if a wheelchair user needed the space? How many people have learned to read between the lines of the Daily Mail and similar newspapers and are much knowledgeable about benefits?

Thousands of posts here every day teach all of us to be just that little bit more aware of how other people live.

There may be a fair bit of judging on Mumsnet, but there is also a massive amount of empathy for the things that really matter.

I've had support through infertility from a huge amount of people on here (mostly under a previous name). The support has been amazing.

Moominsarehippos Fri 12-Apr-13 20:15:47

Sigh. They just don't know us like we know us, do they?

I've been around a while now (namechanged a few times because I get bored) and its been a lot of fun for a grumpy, shy reclusive who can't bear interaction with the real world.

I've also learned quite a few new things and got advice and tips that I would have got from my late mother (had she not selfishly up and kicked the bucket).

poachedeggs Fri 12-Apr-13 20:16:00

I missed whatever went on but I'm sure it'll blow over and Mumsnet will continue to be the wonderfully supportive and raucously funny place it has always been.

You lot helpedd me through the fug and misery of a tiny colicky baby and I will be eternally grateful for those kind lovely supportive posts, day and night, for months while I found my feet. The odd flaming was deserved and enlightening smile

The kindest thing ever was Norksaremessy though. I posted looking for tips on budget weddings. The decision to marry came when we received news that MIL was terminally ill, and so we needed to arrange a quick but special wedding on zero budget. Norks handmade a beautiful and unique tiara and sent it to me out of the goodness of her heart. I was and still am incredibly touched, her only request being that I "pay it forward".

I think that spirit of generosity is evident all over MN and I will defend you bunch of hissy bitches to the last grin

MrsDeVere Fri 12-Apr-13 20:16:17

MN lets me talk about Billie and MN listens.
MN remembers her birthday and MN remembers her anniversary.

MN has created a lasting legacy that touches the lives of children like Billie who are facing cancer without the access to treatment she had.

At last. After almost 7 years someone has helped me DO something in her name. Something I have struggled with and felt guilty about for years.

These things are not the only things that I love about MN but for me, the eclipse everything else.

There are blankets going to Africa with MY daughter's name on them. I know that they will bring comfort because when Billie was ill we got a blanket and I am sitting with it on my bed now.

Women are training to run to raise money for a charity in MY daughter's name. To help give these children proper treatment for cancer. Pain relief for dying children.

Its all done without show, quietly and with humour.

Kveta Fri 12-Apr-13 20:16:41

Aside from the big threads (all the wooly hugs, and related posts), I have personally loved the support (and ridiculousness) of both the september '09 and june '12 ante/post natal threads. I've met some fantastic women through both groups, and had a lot of giggles and a lot of support.

Tiktok/EauRouge/TruthSweet and others have helped me go from 'not sure about this breastfeeding malarky' to 'mad extended bfeeding tandem feeding hippy' (thanks also go to StealthPolarBear for just saying she was ebfing her DS on the sep 09 threads - that normalised it for me massively!)

The small sexual assaults thread helped me massively too - made me feel less alone.

HappyTurquoise Fri 12-Apr-13 20:16:57

All of the above, the kindnesses and great advice, the community spirit and social conscience which, with a bit of levering here or a chain of goodwill there can result in some great life changing moments of pure lasting good.

The swearing! That's freedom, and invites all comers.

Kveta Fri 12-Apr-13 20:19:53

gah, posted too soon!

Essentially, I love this place.

Sure, there are some gits about, but they are outnumbered by the good, funny, clever folk - bit like real life, but always always there. Love it smile

Mumsnetters really helped me when I was feeling really shit about my appearance and the pain I was going through.

It was small scale compared to some but didn't make it in any way less. If youget what I mean..

Ferret's full of woe thread

Also the fucking amazing atrocious cunts who i'm honoured to call actual real life friends.

5madthings Fri 12-Apr-13 20:25:19

Reads and reaches for tissues....blub.

mrsdevere I am honored to run for Billie and for whatevertheweathers did Erin smile xxx

JamieandtheMagicTorch Fri 12-Apr-13 20:25:45

I feel myself on here. I have no real desire to meet anyone on here in RL, but it is enough to know that there are other people out there who feel the way I do about myself, and about the world.

There are many topics I have never posted about, but the advice given to others has supported, informed and educated me - notably domestic violence, ASD, breastfeeding, feminism etc.

Such clever, kind, articulate women.

NK2b1f2 Fri 12-Apr-13 20:26:56

Not finished reading because I'm sobbing too much into my wine. But just wanted to say only on mn can someone post asking for witnesses to come to her wedding and within hours all had been arranged. Two lovely mn's attended and posted pictures. The rest of cheered from afar. Only on mn thanks

Egusta Fri 12-Apr-13 20:28:55

That was one of my favourite threads, NK2

edam Fri 12-Apr-13 20:30:20

I can testify that MI is indeed a v nice person. smile Despite what some posters think of journalists.... There are a load of us on here who joined because we wanted to natter, rather than for nefarious reasons.

Loads of positive stuff on here that has already been mentioned. Lots of people who happen to know about stuff - medical, or financial, or legal, or consumer rights, whatever - give their advice freely and responsibly, pointing people in the direction of RL help. MN can always give you a way to navigate the system, whether it's the NHS or any other form of authority that doesn't always make it straightforward for people to get fair and appropriate treatment. I remember one thread about a very young girl being groomed online where the local copper had basically shrugged his shoulders and told the girl it was her own fault but MN made sure OP got pointed in the right direction (CEOPS).

And abusive relationships. There must be hundreds of MNers who didn't realise how badly they were being treated until a bunch of strangers said, hang on, you deserve better than this.

MrsDeVere Fri 12-Apr-13 20:32:15

Did you SEE the top quality advice I got on my planning threads?
Advice I could never afford in RL.

Amazing

Reality Fri 12-Apr-13 20:32:39

I've gone back to Reality to post this, because it's important.

MN is such a big, important part of my life.

I have made so many real true friends on here who I speak to every day. They make my life better in both tiny everyday ways and big lifechanging ways.

There was a cohort of MNers at my wedding grin. This is the first place I go to share good news and bad.

The advice and help I've received has been immeasurable. It's often like having a million people on your team. Slightly scary, shouty people, at that.

An MNer gave me a Kindle, because she never used it. That piece of random generosity was overwhelming. But I've also been sent chocolates, blankets, books, a spork, cards, all sorts of lovely things. Each and every one of them is as wonderful as the others (although the spork has a special place in my heart).

You've all seen me through some weird and wonderful times and I wouldn't be without you all.

But I have to say, out of all of you, my atrocious cunts are the most amazing group of women I have EVER had the honour to know and I count myself very blessed to have them as my friends. And that's all thanks to MN.

cocolepew Fri 12-Apr-13 20:40:08

4 years ago my DD was only 11 and suicidal. She was diagnosed with anxiety and OCD. She got incredibly scary intrusive thoughts about having the urge to cut her wrists or throat.

I was absoulutely devastated. I had friends and family to talk to and they were marvellous but I wanted to talk about it constantly and try to find out as much as I could.

Pixieonaleaf started a couple of threads to talk about OCD in children and adults. It was a lifeline. She was so kind.

I wasn't posting much for a couple of years and missed up what happened with pixie, but I'll always be grateful to her and the others who posted how OCD has affected their life, both as children and adults.

Convert Fri 12-Apr-13 20:41:47

I agree with Reality's lovely post. It is like having a million lovely, shouty, don't fucking mess with me type people. All standing behind you, willing you to succeed.

FuckThisShit Fri 12-Apr-13 20:42:39

Oh good lord, wherever can I start?

First, when I made the decision to return to the UK after my relationship fell apart was the tremendous support form people on here, finishing up with a complete stranger had me, my youngest DD and my mother to stay, in the arse end of nowhere in France, as a break stop in our 1300 mile drive home.

Then, when I was having an awful time trying to get some maintenance from DD3's father and spending a lot of time up at the High Court - just knowing I could rant and sob was an added strength.

When I was diagnosed with cancer late last year the support was mindblowing. I received parcel after parcel with wonderful goodies from a beautiful hand knitted hat to sticky toffee puddings and chocolates to wine, gin and a whole damn load of chocs and flowers. Another bunch clubbed together to give me something to spoil myself with. A case of wine came from elsewhere.

The MN Secret Santa made me cry with generosity of posters to both me and all the other receivers.

Wooly Hugs well, what can I say.

There are other things too, but they were under a name change that I'd rather not link to this name as it was a very sensitive and personal matter. But the overwhelming kindness shown to me by three particular MNers will leave a warm glow for ever and a day.

I fucking love Mumsnet. i can truly say that some of my dearest and most amazing friends, who will hopefully be in my life forever, were met on here.

My atrocious cunts in particular are, quite simply, beyond awesome.

FuckThisShit Fri 12-Apr-13 20:44:56

Awesome cross post Reality! I love we both declare massive love for 'my' atrocious cunts grin

Reality Fri 12-Apr-13 20:46:26

hehe grin

MrsDeVere Fri 12-Apr-13 20:47:51

Did I tell you about the atrocious cunty viper that came through the snow to my Billie's 21st birthday 'party'?

BIWI Fri 12-Apr-13 20:49:03

Never, ever, ever would I so be pleased to be called an atrocious cunt. It's a real accolade here grin

I'd also like to say a massive thank you to MNHQ. Some of you I have met, many of you are just 'names on a screen'. But without exception, you are all part of the lovely fabric that is MN. And we must try your patience many times over!

Badvoc Fri 12-Apr-13 20:51:09

I am always in awe of posters like AF, getorf and TSC.
The kindness of people like BIWI, fuzz pig, ellenjane, moosemama, star etc
My lovely lovely post natal group...5 years on and going strong! smile
The great and knowledgeable advice from people like cogito and pigletjohn.
I am humbled by the bravery and humour of posters like mrsdv, trazzles, expat, cupoftea...
Simply, my life is richer for having access to these amazing people.

FuckThisShit Fri 12-Apr-13 20:51:44

That'll be Billie's Party held in the South Pole will it? It certainly bloody looked like it. And, anyway, it was my pleasure. DD3 and I had a blast xx

Isaidhangonamin Fri 12-Apr-13 20:52:55

When I need to Properly 'know' the answer to something or just need some advice I've always found it here.

I detest the the pseudo-mnetters that try to put spanners in the works so to speak but they are few and far between and the real cunts amongst us can suss them out for what they really are.

MNHQ winewinewinethanks these are for you....

And as for the rest of youwinethankswinebrewthankswinebrewwinebrewwinebrewthanksthanks

Gerrof Fri 12-Apr-13 20:58:19

Thank you lovely bof.

Where I mentioend earlier the gifts I was sent when I was ill it was bof who sent them. I was very ill and more than that really worried that I wouldntn get better, it was genuinely one of the lowest ebbs of my life. That meant a huge, huge deal to me.

I also am delighted to be an arrocious cunt. My dd doesn't get it, when I told her we call each other that as a sign of affection she was truly horrified!

And pistey - I love you. What you and the knitters do is truly lovely.

MrsDeVere Fri 12-Apr-13 21:00:20

AND you got a lift up the station with an international superstar! What more could a girl ask for? grin

Gerrof Fri 12-Apr-13 21:00:31

And Nancy Mitford is an atrocious cunt.

Raahh Fri 12-Apr-13 21:00:44

I feel a fraud adding anything, because I mainly use MN for crap telly threads-(I'm the one who usually starts the X factor/Voice threads-sorry and Doctors ) but I lurk enough on other stuff, and 'know' enough posters to appreciate the support that is there for those who need it.

People who don't agree on one thread, often find common ground on others.
And I spend too much of my time on here grin

I love you all it's Friday, I'm a bit tipsy

EchoBitch Fri 12-Apr-13 21:00:55

grin

Being an atrocious cunt is an honour Gerrof!

One day she will understand.

EchoBitch Fri 12-Apr-13 21:01:33

Nancy Mitford was a crashing snob.

A bunch of us started a thread when we'd just found out about our collective BFPs. From there, we chatted every day throughout our pregnancies, often many times, and there were literally thousands of posts! Chat chat chat! Moan moan moan about puffy ankles and no sleep due to loo trips in the night, various appointment results, symptoms, what Dr Google had to say etc etc. We sympathised, consoled, advised and hand held through some pretty scary and also exciting times. One Mummy had her baby very early, months before the rest of us and we were there with her as much as possible cheering her on when times must have been so tough. There were often lots of times where I'd come online to MN to talk about stuff I couldn't discuss in RL and it was wonderful to "reach out" to others in the same boat. Anyhoo, months down the line, we're all still going strong and have become friends in RL too, meeting up fairly often with our babies for a nice (if chaotic) coffee and sarnie in John Lewis caff. My Dh thinks we're a bit mad...

We've organised a big first birthday bash for all the babies all over the UK this summer (you're invited too for cake and craziness, fear not smile ) and I can't wait to meet some more of the amazing women who have been such a strength and solace to me. Sob. So, thank you MN thanks, tea and cake on me.

Shellington Fri 12-Apr-13 21:02:36

YY Maryz - you reminded me of Anthony Nolan there, too.
Also those posters who receive PM's of help, those who start more discrete threads and those who NC - plus the many more who lurk and benefit from the collective wisdom by proxy, as it were.

And the woolly huggers have even more of my admiration after I tried one teeny quilt sqare myself - and ended up with a sortof wonky bookmark confused grin

My daughter was stillborn two years ago and I've suffered two miscarriages since, I have received so much support from the beheavement thread but also the Angel mums continuous thread in conception. Those ladies are truly amazing and supportive, non judgemental. They have help me through som very dark times, I truly think of them all as friends.

Also the christmas appeal, this last christams I received gifts. The first was a voucher card with £5 on it and a little note, it made me cry so much that some one out there was thinking of me. It didn't matter what was sent the value wasn't the point its all about the thought.

Woollyhugs is amazing I feel honoured to be a blanketeer, pistey and knotty deserve medals for what they do smile or at least be made into Dames.

I am just astounded by the kindness of strangers on here, sharing their experiences and knowledge to help others out whether it be help with ingredients for dinner or help for symptoms of illness in a young child. I love mumsnet.

MrsGeologist Fri 12-Apr-13 21:03:37

The friends I've met here who have become my RL friends.

A whole load of minor shitty things happened before Christmas, which together just made me miserable and a MNer sent me a takeaway and wine to cheer me up. I cried when I got that. It was exactly what I needed and I'll remember it forever.

The MNer who came over when my Nana died, just to keep me company while I drank wine and chatted shit.

Mostly it's the knowledge that I know whatever happens, I'll find support here from the MNers who are now RL friends and many others who offer advice and virtual hand-holding out of the kindness of their hearts.

Sparklingbrook Fri 12-Apr-13 21:04:39

Watching the Olympic Opening ceremony last year with the thread going at the same time made it even more brilliant than it was. grin

everlong Fri 12-Apr-13 21:06:40

Dear god. I'm a bit drunk and already emotional but these posts are so lovely.

Gorgeous,strong wimmin.

FuckThisShit Fri 12-Apr-13 21:14:00

Well MrsDV, that was lovely too, but the kids arsing about in the snow and the beautiful smile on your face is what did it.

everlong you're one of them gorgeous strong wimmin too you know.

YoniOldClothCatPuss Fri 12-Apr-13 21:14:55

Well Id like to point the naysayers in the direction of the Miscarriage board. I would probably have lost the plot without them to listen to me pour my heart out and offer support.
There was SpookyCharlotte's ectopic thread. She could have DIED. The hospital kept sending her home. MNers advice kept sending her back until she received attention.
ClutchingPearls' son could have DIED. The advice they received here was bang on. It happens over and over.
There was more than one thread supporting a poster who's waters had gone very early whilst on holiday in America. She spent many weeks bedridden in hospital in another country, and Mumsnetters were there to keep her company online.
CupofTeaPlease and Beatrice's support threads.
Threads helping people leave abusive relationships.
Threads helping people cope with bereavement.
Threads offering physical help.
Threads offering advice. Support. A shoulder to cry on. A voice in the darkness.
Threads full of nonsense that make you roll around laughing,that take your mind off how crap life is and you thought you would never laugh again.
Threads that give you a much needed virtual slap around the face when you are being irrational.
Whatever the problem there is always somewhere on MN who has been there, done it, is having the same problem, deals with that problem in the line of work or just has a little bit of sympathy.
Yes there are threads that go tits up but more often than not there is a good reason.
Mumsnet is bloody amazing. You need to be here and see what goes on for yourself. Just dipping in and reading one or two random threads just isnt enough.
I LOVE YOU GUYS. grin

OpheliasWeepingWillow Fri 12-Apr-13 21:14:59

MN helped me in my darkest hour when my dd was in hospital in a foreign country, with brain suspected abnormalities. I was waiting for the neurologist in the dark late at night holding my dd's hand and I will never forget the kindness and support of MNetters.

OpheliasWeepingWillow Fri 12-Apr-13 21:15:41

*Suspected brain abnormalities!

everlong Fri 12-Apr-13 21:18:36

<<blows kiss to fuck>>

Well I've got sitting in my house a huge pile of cards for a fellow mumsnetter, sent from all over the world following the birth of her son.

A long running thread from August last year, massive massive support, at a time of great stress for the MNer, and out of it all, I feel there's a great friendship been born between us all, even though we're yet to meet.

I found MN by pure accident and bloody love it smile

Someone mentioned pixieonaleaf- she was so helpful and knowdfeable on the asthma threads, and her advice that if you can't sing the first line of twinkle twinkle go to the hospital helped so many dc. I hope she is ok and about under a name change.

PseudoBadger Fri 12-Apr-13 21:24:35

I never ever thought I'd need to use the miscarriage board. But I did, and received fantastic support from a small group of others (particularly Geekster and Bridget) who have been/were going through the same thing. One day, I hope to be strong enough to go in there and offer support myself.

prettybird Fri 12-Apr-13 21:31:03

Don't even know where to start. There are so many acts of random (and not so random) kindness....

Woolly Hugs (need I say more?); advice on any and all subjects - some life-saving, some trivial; support following miscarriages, bereavements, break-ups, job loss; celebrations of good times....

A whole cross section of life.

As well as having received good advice, I hope I've also helped others on occasion with my own advice/experience.

I've made real life friends through MN - lovely, warm hearted and generous women who have made my life richer through knowing them.

I'm glad I'm part of this nest of vipers. smile

Valpollicella Fri 12-Apr-13 21:35:38

I can only echo everything on this thread.

From the moment I stumbled on this nest, 6 years ago (fuckin 'ell) there hasnt been a day where I havent been on here.

I have howled with laughter at threads that are now in Classics (check out the British Gas one. Followed that one live as it were and omg was grin the whole way through)

Been to meet ups...organised meet up grin and the pure joy at meeting mners was great.

Im even off to see Muse with a mner in May grin grin grin < v excited

All I can say is my life is better, richer and more rounded becase of MN. I have met some amazing friends... And I couldnt imagine not having them in my life. I couldnt imagine not having this fantastic place to come to...to read and laugh, weep, rejoice, applaud and inform.

I fucking love you all. YOU, yes you, reading this, make us what we are.

Massive love to you all and cunt offs if you don't like us.

smilingthroughgrittedteeth Fri 12-Apr-13 21:38:08

I've sobbed my way through these.

I will be eternally grateful to all of the lovely ladies on the spoons thread www.mumsnet.com/Talk/general_health/1723265-Spoons-Support-for-those-with-chronic-pain-fatiguing-illnesses especially the wonderful grockle who not only started the thread but sends cards and gifts to cheer us all up despite going through a pretty rough time herself. We listen to each other moan and cry without judging which is something rarely found in rl.

I remember a thread in Dec where people listed things they no longer wanted and sent them to other mumsnetters, in some cases meaning children who probably wouldn't have got Christmas presents had something to open on Christmas morning.

The threads in the dogs house where mnetters drive miles to take in a dog that for whatever reason the owner can no longer keep.

I love mumsnet for the wit and humour and sometimes downright insane threads that make my days just a little brighter.

Most of all I love the sense of community that a group of strangers bring into my life and I'm proud to be a part of mumsnet.

Punkatheart Fri 12-Apr-13 21:41:59

Ah lovely thread.

I came here a long time ago. But I really NEEDED to be here in 2011, when my other half left me. I was so distraught - having lymphoma as well and my daughter suffering from health issues...I didn't think I could cope and I really didn't want to continue my life.

The women here helped me so very much. I received dozens of private messages - some even offering to come round to visit. Genuine, strong, wise women - with some ballbreaking advice too. Made me cry, made me laugh, made me better.

You know who you all are - some of you had stories of your own too.

Mumsnet is a damn fine place. I will be forever grateful.

Portofino Fri 12-Apr-13 21:43:28

And SGM wants to thank in particular HelenMN for the support she gave during one of the sadly unnecessary difficult times in FWR.

redwellybluewelly Fri 12-Apr-13 21:47:16

I wish to god I had been on MN when my baby stopped moving late in pregnancy, I was too frightened to seek help and by the time I got to hospital she was in a bad way. The hospital then cocked up the delivery by not moving faster to save her and she was left in NICU in a coma with severe brain damage. I've watched (and sometimes give) advice on threads where people need to trust their instinct and just seek help.

I've followed and wept for Bea and the tea set, I've sent love and thoughts to other babies going through tough times and I've learnt so so much.

On the flip side I've changed my housekeeping thanks to the fly lady threads, my washing machine sparkles and my bathroom is ready for my MIL no matter how little notice she gives. And I've figured out we are only human and there are only so many hours in the day!

I've learnt confidence as well, and responsibility for my own happiness, how to value my small family and put work life balance into perspective, as well as put old bad relationships into the past.

MN rocks. I've had my share of pasting and I've seen some bat shit crazy threads but theres nothing quite like spending two hours getting small child to sleep knowing there are loads of others in the same boat!

redwellybluewelly Fri 12-Apr-13 21:49:02

Oh and what brought me to MN was a thread about toddler art. I cried with laughter then I registered.

HeroineChick Fri 12-Apr-13 21:49:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MistyB Fri 12-Apr-13 22:05:01

Lone voice in the wind, but it's not always sweetness and light is it.....

God forbid you question vaccines, think alternative therapies might have their place or are fat on style and beauty.....

exoticfruits Fri 12-Apr-13 22:06:37

Just out of interest I did a search of what I would call some of the more abrasive posters and none of them have posted on here yet. I am convinced that MN is serving 2 sorts , those who want support,and to be supporting,and those who want debate (some of it 'robust' ). Some crosses over and both are equally valid. However I am convinced it would be better to separate the two in a more marked way and it would cause less upset - especially to the unwary. It would also ensure that journalists didn't immediately tap into the parts they could find fault with. Personally I enjoy the lively debate, even though it gets heated. I am fascinated by the wide range of views.

redwellybluewelly Fri 12-Apr-13 22:07:38

But as far as the debates then often there are antagonists on 'both' sides of the coin, kinda like hooligans at football matches, there is always someone seeking out a bunfight.

exoticfruits Fri 12-Apr-13 22:10:23

MistyB has a point. I know to keep off vaccines, last time it was so bad that some kind people pmed me to support.
There are certain things I know to keep off- it may only be strangers on the Internet but my skin isn't hard enough for some subjects.

MistyB Fri 12-Apr-13 22:10:50

Mmm, the hooligans can put those wanting to make their point off joining in the debate though...

WouldBeHarrietVane Fri 12-Apr-13 22:11:47

Y y on separating forums, exotics. I suggested a relationships lite board recently where I could post for support on normal ups and downs but no ltb type stuff.

MistyB Fri 12-Apr-13 22:13:00

PS I am not a fat, non vacc, alternative hippy though. I am just a faceless name on the Internet.

Lomaamina Fri 12-Apr-13 22:13:38

The wonderfully generous ladies on the breast cancer thread who helped through one of the most terrifying periods of my life.

A few that haven't been mentioned that come to mind. The support for OnlyJoking as she lost her dh, the support over the past 9 months for Lou, since the chunt left her (and all the cards and gifts being sent for her ds), the support Starsandstripes (?) got when posting asking if SWBU asking her dh to pick up a loaf of bread and some milk on the way home from work - and the subsequent support as she left him and started afresh. And TwoTeachers (?) with the shopkeeper in Derbyshire, SleepingwiththeEnemy, and so many hundreds of others besides.

Others mentioned above include the support for TrinityRhino, GentleOtter, CupOfTea.

The woolly hugs, the secret santas. The stately homes threads. On a sillier note, the support for Shiny and the penguin set-up.

But more than that. The support for the hundreds of lurkers (self included) who never or rarely post, but who gain so much from the knowledge and wisdom that is Mumsnet.

The fact, as others have pointed out, that no matter who posts, no matter what the situation is (yoni's excepted wink), somebody has experience, someone has advice, and help will be given, whether it is your 1st post, or 10,001st post.

There is only one area which seems to fit the criteria of a nest of vipers, and I often have to sit on my hands reading stuff in there because people do come in for such a mauling so often. But the one area is extremely unrepresentative of Mumsnet as a whole.

exoticfruits Fri 12-Apr-13 22:17:50

I have given MNHQ my views. They haven't replied as yet. I know they don't want censorship, and I agree with them there, but they do get it wrong sometimes and end up making mistakes - mainly because they can't really work out who is a troll and who isn't.

exoticfruits Fri 12-Apr-13 22:19:39

But that one area is the one that is taken to represent MN, aGlassHalfEmpty- and that is the sad part of it.

maillotjaune Fri 12-Apr-13 22:21:18

I have had fantastic support when pregnant after a miscarriage, when DS3 wasn't gaining weight and I was coming under pressure from HCPs to stop breastfeeding (thank you TikTok among others), and when DH was diagnosed with cancer and my MIL was being even more difficult than usual I remember a couple of mumsnetters checking up on how things were going weeks and months later.

Although it isn't on the same scale, I have read a couple of amazing books that I only picked up as a result of threads on here and learned a lot about how different (and difficult) many people's lives are which I hope has made me less judgemental.

FuckThisShit Fri 12-Apr-13 22:22:38

Exotic - how do you know for sure that one or more on your list haven't already posted though?

exoticfruits Fri 12-Apr-13 22:24:46

This thread started today- I did a search and they have posted today, but not on here- that isn't to say they won't.

exotic - I know that all too well, and as you say, that is the sad part of it. I have lurked here for years (as some of my list may show blush) and that is such a small part of the whole place.

blondieminx Fri 12-Apr-13 22:29:10

I love MN.

The support and kindness here are fab. And the humour!

We are ridiculous sometimes (museum of toddler art, anyone?)! but we are sublime.

exoticfruits Fri 12-Apr-13 22:29:26

I think it is all fine- they just need to reformat MumsNet Talk so that you have to search for topics and it is obvious which are for support and which are for debate. Some are safe, bereavement for example isn't going to get people wandering in being nasty but something like SN isn't safe. I never go onto the one about dogs because I don't have a dog but it came to my attention that you can have real bunfights in there! I was amazed!

zzzzz Fri 12-Apr-13 22:45:42

Why do you think SN isn't "safe"?

I have a photo of dd1, now 5, when she was about 5 months. She is pretending to eat a trifle for OJ's DH. We all ate trifles for Steve that day. I might have eaten several

And yy to the miscarriage board and all the support I was given when I was sent home to wait for an ERPC with a one sided leaflet and almost zero information.

LackaDAISYcal Fri 12-Apr-13 22:49:33

What a lovely idea MNHQ thanks

I've been involved in lots of loveliness on here; several Christmas campaigns (as donor and also, once, as recipient which blew me away completely); putting a rescue package together for one of our PN group with an ill DD; MN Woolly hugs, both as crafter and recipient of wool when I was skint; as the recipient of a lovely box of goodies from my MN mates, when I was the first of my original AN thread to sprog again --far too soon--; Lulumama taking the time to talk to me on the phone about my options regarding VBAC and elective CS and making a CS personal when I was pregnant with DD; the support on here giving me the strength to actually attempt and manage a VBA2C with DS2; the support in general and the fact that complete strangers will go the extra mile to help people in their hour of need.

Journos should realise that AIBU (which is what I assume gets us the "viper" tag) is only a teeny tiny part of MN!

OMG - Gwendoline - trifle for Steve. Bittersweet memories.

crazynanna Fri 12-Apr-13 22:59:25

I think we come together here and do things we thought we may never had done before. I was once ready to run down the road at 11pm here in North London,braless, clutching piriton for a member's friend who was having a bad reaction to her chemo. Turned out I didn't need to,as I believe the lady had a queue outside her door of MNetters with medicine!

Someone once sent me some unwanted clothing on the "I have but don't need...." thread. When I received the parcel...she had put in a yummy bar of chocolate as well, and had written a smiley face on the packet.

Says it all really smile

everlong Fri 12-Apr-13 23:03:15

I remember that piriton mercy dash. Awesome indeed.

ouryve Fri 12-Apr-13 23:04:44

Thinking back, I think the first I'd ever heard of MN was from a leaflet I got when I had my MC. This was almost 8 years ago.

ouryve Fri 12-Apr-13 23:05:39

Oh - and I only half remembered the name of the site and ended up joining netmums grin

I drove 10 miles down the road at about midnight one night to see if someone's DH's car was outside a particular house and report back. I'd forgotten about that!

Portofino Fri 12-Apr-13 23:08:40

I just,love NLs description of the Hive Mind. For good or Ill.

everlong Fri 12-Apr-13 23:10:53

Gwendoline was that the poster who thought her dh was up to something? Was it something to do with a letter?

What happened ??

RandallPinkFloyd Fri 12-Apr-13 23:14:15

I first found MN after googling my symptoms when I was feeling very ill at 9 wks pg. I found the fabulous LucindaE's HG thread and it pretty much saved my life. My doctor wasn't listening and only going back in with the knowledge I found on here got me a diagnosis. By that point I was so dehydrated my veins had collapsed and my potassium levels were so low there was a major risk of kidney damage. I was hospitalised for a long time. Everyone on that thread then supported me throughout what turned out to be a very scary and stressful pregnancy.

I learned about the "count the kicks" campaign on here and bought a wrist band. I was admitted several times for reduced movement. The final time they decided to induce. After a terrifyingly quick labour DS was born blue and floppy with the cord around his neck. Thankfully he was resuscitated very quickly and has suffered no ill effects. Without MN I wouldn't have pushed the midwives to act. I would has trusted their advice that movements slow down the closer you get to full term. My DS would have died.

When my whole world collapsed 4 months later the nest of vipers came to my rescue again. My then DH had a fling with a mutual friend. I started a thread the next day and the instant flood of support was just overwhelming. They literally got me through it minute by minute. There is no way in the world I would have had the strength to do what I've done without this place.

A year later and MN is my company when I'm lonely. It's often the only adult conversation I have in a day. It's also friffing hilarious!

It's no exaggeration to say that MN has changed my life.

Ruprekt Fri 12-Apr-13 23:21:49

I have been on Mumsnet since 2004 and still love it as much as ever!

I was at Weightwatchers on off for 20 years, losing and gaining the same stone......could not face it again.

I looked at a low carb thread in Jan with Biwi and her gang and have now lost 20lbs!!! smilesmile

The support is amazing and invaluable and I have made some great friends. Biwi even strokes my hair. Tis lovely.

bountyicecream Fri 12-Apr-13 23:25:21

MN has literally changed my life. It has given me the realisation that my relationship is not normal, and the support (both practical and hand holding) to actually gather myself and leave (very soon) the emotional abusing twunt that I have wasted 10 yrs of life on. Nowhere in real life could have provided me with the support that I've had from a bunch of strangers who truly understand what I'm going through because they've been there too.

I can't remember everlong, it was years ago. I don't think it was another woman scenario. I seem to recall it being a family squabble or something and the person's house was BIL or something. The car wasn't there anyway.

verygentlydoesit Fri 12-Apr-13 23:35:31

MN has helped me in so many ways. From my first post, where I asked for advice on ditching the dummy and got wise thoughts, mostly along the lines of "why bother, it's no big deal, leave it until he's ready".

Through a couple of life changing upheavals where wonderful MNers held my hand through very dark times, at all hours. They helped me through turmoil, stuck beside me, 'listened' and supported. They made the unbearable bearable minute by minute and I will be eternally grateful. I'm lucky to have a good network of supportive friends and family IRL, however it was Mumsnetters that helped me most when I was in dispair.

Some people in the media have made up their minds about MN, I'm not sure they are the types who are open to changing their opinions. But really, it takes a small amount of simple research to see the truth. Maybe the truth, however lovely just doesn't make good news biscuit.

piprabbit Fri 12-Apr-13 23:40:50

Using MN is like swimming in at the seaside in the UK.
There is no point faffing about at the edges, jumping back because the water is cold, a bit of seaweed just wrapped itself around your ankle or you stood on a sharp stone.
You have to commit to it - wade on in there until you are up to your neck, start splashing about, envelop yourself in it and join in with all the other people splashing around.
It's a lovely place to be and the sense of well-being persists long after you stagger out and towel yourself down.

OK - so once in a while a turd floats past or you have a close encounter with a dead crab, but mostly it is an absolute, life-affirming pleasure to be here.

Zara1984 Fri 12-Apr-13 23:44:01

The night DS was born, I was scared and alone in a hospital bed. He'd had suctioning and CPR, wasn't feeding, and DH had been chucked out as it was the middle of the night. I was more scared than I've been in my life and MN was there for me. I got replies to my post saying HELP faster than I could get a midwife by my bedside. I'm so, so grateful for Mumsnet. Every single day.

Millions of users vs a couple of whiney posts in the DM? No contest.

PeneloPeePitstop Fri 12-Apr-13 23:51:22

This is hard.
As parent to kids with SN I really do see the good here, but there's horrible trollery towards people in my situation. And big fat silence about that.

It's a great site. Unless you're 'different'.

AmberLeaf Sat 13-Apr-13 00:00:31

Mumsnet is my google when I want to not only know about something, but to get real user feedback sort of thing?

Ive had loads and loads of advice type stuff from reading the SN boards, support too.

Ive been in awe of the wooly hugs people, so kind and what a thing to organise! RatherbeonthePiste and the others [so sorry I cant remember the name] are amazing. Im a shit knitter so donated wool instead.

I agree with the person who said about all the stuff that goes unseen, I have been touched by PMs Ive received from people.

Ive learned loads about stuff Ive had no experience of.

I have appreciated when MNetters have posted on threads and sent PMs thanking me for sharing my experiences on having a child with SNs and offering support on some rather heated threads involving children with special needs. Some lovely lovely people who have stood up to be counted when they didn't need to, but just because they thought it was the right thing to do. There are quite a few and I don't really want to write names because I know I will forget someone important! Kungfupanda sticks in my mind though, 5madthings is another. When I remember the rest I will come back and post their names too.

I love reading the ghosty/weird stuff that happened type threads and the embarrassing things that happened to people ones are so funny and have me shaking with laughter until I have to read the posts out to whoever says 'why are you laughing Mum'

Mumsnet is so many things and it is fabulous.

ClaraOswinOswald Sat 13-Apr-13 00:03:54

I will never forget crying with laughter at the whole garlic clove up the bum thread.

I also feel far more confident as a mother and a woman since finding this site. I find I am more understanding of what others are going through on the one hand, yet less inclined to put up with twattery in real life.

AmberLeaf Sat 13-Apr-13 00:04:22

Avasiatropolis or something like that [really bad at remembering names!] was another lovely one who offered support at a particularly hard time between christmas and new year.

edam Sat 13-Apr-13 00:08:22

Penelo, I'm really sorry to hear that.

SirBoobAlot Sat 13-Apr-13 00:20:51

The power of Mumsnet never fails to amaze me.

I joined four years ago, pregnant at 17, very young, frightened and in circumstances far from ideal. I found compassion, understanding and support here. Kind people from my antenatal thread who had older children already sent me boxes of clothes for my DS.

I have made some of my dearest real life friends via this site, who I laugh with, cry with, drink with... Mumsnet meet ups are the highlight of my social calender. The next one is the day after my birthday, there shall be cocktails wink

The biggest reminder of how wonderful MN is I have ever time I walk around my house.

When I posted, two and a half years ago now, that I had finally found a landlord that had said yes on a property that was suitable for what I needed, I had tonnes of congratulations. I also had many, many posts from people who knew that I was setting up a home for the first time, offering me things to get started.

I was touched when someone offered me a lap shade, duvet cover, knife block, mini grill and place mats.

I was staggered when someone else said that, if I knew a man with a van, they had a sofa for me. This was later updated with the offer of a bookcase for DS as well.

I'm crying writing this now. To think that strangers, on the internet, could, would, and do, such kind things, expecting nothing in return... It restores some of my faith in humanity every time I sit down on my sofa.

Of course there will always be arguments here. Any time you throw so many people together into a situation, there will be disagreements. But that doesn't sum up a place. The power of Mumsnet is that we can be mid-bun fight, then find out one of our number is in need, and all buns are dropped as people do everything they possibly can - and often more - to help.

Mumsnet is a wonderful thing. I type this from the safety and comfort of my first ever home, a home that is still partially furnished by Mumsnetters.

So to all of you... Thank you. x

surprisearrival Sat 13-Apr-13 00:24:29

i think the Daily Mail article had it about right..Boden wearing Judgemental (judegey pants wearing) egotisitical mothers. I like the reviews but barring the single mothers threads I have never encountered a worse bunch of threads... egotistical, selfish and so so judgemental.mumsnet seems to be for the wealthy mums... even the "mumsnet recomends" emails are aimed at famiies with lots of money!

DIddled Sat 13-Apr-13 00:38:52

I can't begin to count the amount of sage advice, hand holding, support and general niceness I have had on here. Some people tell it like it is which can be hard to hear ( thank you Any F***er xxxxxx) but I never come away thinking that the people who post genuinely care.. That's why I bloody well love you lot xxxx

Plus the style and beauty section rocks xxxxxx

lisad123everybodydancenow Sat 13-Apr-13 01:00:40

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheYoniVicarInaTutu Sat 13-Apr-13 01:18:22

i love this place.
last year, Bellavita sent me a gift. I had a thread which detailed a particularly hard time i was having.
it absolutely made my day. We met up for lunch.
this year when her dh was poorly, i sent her a gift. this place is mutually supportive - we all prop each other up.

ive had 3 threads now on the mh boards and the support on there has been my lifeline. total strangers have supported me through thick and thin.

and recently, the yoni threads have had me in hysterics.

ive vented about my DS who has special needs, ive had wonderful advice from folk in the same boat.

i adore mumsnet. i dont care what anyone else thinks. the people on here are fabulous. I would be totally lost without it.

weegiemum Sat 13-Apr-13 04:36:17

I love Mumsnet. I joined waaaaay back in 2002, just after my ds (dc2) was born.

I lived in a very remote rural area at the time, with very little on for new mums, and mn was a real lifeline through my PND.

I got a massive amount of support through a very very difficult unexpected pregnancy (with dd2 - I had a mirena that slipped) and the long thread with my birth congratulations is in dd2's baby box for posterity!

I've met some fabulous people, been supported but also able to offer support, last summer a mumsnetter came to mine for a holiday, had about 7 others round to visit. I'm very privileged to know expat and Giraffes and to have been a teeny tiny part of the awful journey they went through with Aillidh last year. I regularly meet Aitch at the school gate <claim to fame> (and aitch, we will get that coffee this term!!!).

My dd2 developed a hip disability aged about 4 and the SN mums were fabulous at helping me negotiate all the stuff about wheelchairs etc. And many of you rejoiced recently when we got the all clear for her. I myself developed a neurological illness 16 months ago and I've become part of a very small group of others with similar issues offering support, and I also have a rather niche mental health problem, also supported on here.

One of the best things mn has done for me is to make me laugh. If I'm ever very down, I head to classics. There's very little that reading the Guinea-Pig obituary thread doesn't cure!!

Thanks mn for a great 11 years - hope I'm here at least 11 more!

exoticfruits Sat 13-Apr-13 07:02:35

Two people asked me why I said 'SN wasn't safe' and PeneloPeePitStop (with a SN child) answered it. I have just been very aware that some of them get less than supportive answers.And to answer lisad123 you don't have to search for it, you merely go to last 15 mins, or last hour, or active etc.
My whole argument is that it would be a kinder place if you had to search - people wouldn't scroll by and put in quite a cruel two pennyworth, they wouldn't visit at all.

BikeRunSki Sat 13-Apr-13 07:14:46

Friends have a toy that DD loves. Googling revealed that lots of people used to sell it, but no one seemed to anymore
. I started a thread asking if anyone knew where I could get one, and linked an image. Lovely Indith sent me her DD's old one, just for the price of posting. DD was then 14 months and was made up.

ValarMorGoolis Sat 13-Apr-13 07:25:33

I never feel alone.

I have made some amazing friends on here, who have been there for me no matter what. thanks

surprisearrival it's not about wealth. It can't be. It's an anonymous forum where a tiny percentage of the threads have anything to do with money. When they do there are a ton of suggestions on how to stretch a chicken for three days and how to amuse children on no money. The number of threads I've seen supporting people who have no money.

I don't think a site that is non-confrontational and avoids telling people when they are wrong helps anyone. If you're being unreasonable then MN will cast the scales from your eyes. There's not point in posting in Aibu unless you are prepared to listen to the answer!

As a general point I would also nominate Talcandturnips for special recognition as the woman never fails to cheer me up no matter what mood I started out. smile

exoticfruits Sat 13-Apr-13 07:52:11

I don't know how many people work at MNHQ but I think they must be over stretched. As I said earlier I was very upset by a bereavement thread because by accident I was up incredibly early and the only one to answer. I felt that MN let her down and when I enquired it was a case of 'nothing can be done'. A poster has kindly shown me that she did get the best of MN and I wonder why MNHQ couldn't have told me that, but I expect they simply didn't know - not because they didn't want to, or care- just a lack of time and staff and other pressing concerns.

BellaVita Sat 13-Apr-13 07:54:33

The lovely Vicar did indeed send me a gift and it made my day. She very thoughtfully went to the place I go to have my hair done and bought me a voucher so I could treat myself.

In fact I missed something else out too the fab LizzyLou sent me a bouquet of flowers a couple of years back.

God, I have a shite memory blush.

SoupDragon Sat 13-Apr-13 08:00:12

And to answer lisad123 you don't have to search for it, you merely go to last 15 mins, or last hour, or active etc.

The SNs topics don't show up in Active unless you have opted into them. If they show up in the others, this is probably an oversight.

exoticfruits Sat 13-Apr-13 08:03:11

I never look in active, I look in last 15 mins and they are always there. I haven't opted out or in to anything. I have told MNHQ that I don't think you should see every subject as you scroll down. I don't know what others get but I get everything- I can't be the only one.

exoticfruits Sat 13-Apr-13 08:05:54

I am simply too lazy to hide things- I scroll quickly past ante natal, conception and others but I do stop off at others if something attracts my interest - it is not necessarily a good thing.

verygentlydoesit Sat 13-Apr-13 08:17:57

I've posted already saying why Mumsnet is an incredibly special place.

I've been reading the thread though and am saddened to see that several posters have experienced problems on SN threads. It sounds as though this area is singled out more than some others by trolls and vicious posters. I'm really concerned to read this, and I think most MN would agree that it's appalling. I don't have the expertise to know how to address this, and I think MNHQ are probably doing what they can- but is there anything else that can be done?

SoupDragon Sat 13-Apr-13 08:19:02

If you click the Customise option and then go to "ignore topics" there is a SN opt -in there (ie it's not easy to stumble across). The default is set to not show them.
I wonder if it was properly updated to include all the SNs topics when they were added.

verygentlydoesit Sat 13-Apr-13 08:19:22

Oops I see exotic has already made a good point- must type faster....

Badvoc Sat 13-Apr-13 08:21:44

Wrt sn/sen...It is a huge problem vertgently.

verygentlydoesit Sat 13-Apr-13 08:30:39

I don't want to derail the thread Badvoc, but I'm really sorry to hear that the support on SN is affected in this way. Presumably HQ are aware of it? What can we do?

Tee2072 Sat 13-Apr-13 08:34:31

I don't think anyone is saying MN is perfect. But it certainly isn't the horrid place the press are portraying it to be lately.

What are they all so afraid of? A bunch of women having opinions?

Sorry to hear about the difficulties on the SN boards. I hope MNHQ can find an answer.

Badvoc Sat 13-Apr-13 08:41:53

Me either, and yes HQ are aware.
It's a thorny issue that's for sure.
For far too long MN point blank refused to remove dreadful disablist posts as "they educate" (!!)
They don't do that much anymore, thankfully.
I think it's great that people can go on MNSN and see the other side of the fence so to speak, just a cursory glance would show you what awful things parents of children with sn/sen have to deal with every day.
MNSN has been a lifeline for me and my ds.
MNHQ have a very difficult job wrt MNSN IMHO.

On a personal note, this place is the reason I lost loads of weight (was obese before). I've been 'on a diet' my whole adult life, but it was only when I started my first thread on here and got actual, real, support and advice that I did it.

Can I also mention an mner, not sure if we're allowed to mention names? She offered to send me a tablecloth and refused any money for it or postage. I told her that the postage I'd saved would be going to the fund of a sick little girl I know locally. When the tablecloth arrived and I opened the parcel, money dropped out!

In general I can always count on mn. No question too big - as you see in te relationships topic - or too small, like when I start my "i'm bored, chat to me" threads. There's almost always someone who can relate to what you're going to. And I've met some fantastic people locally,and also had some very enjoyable evenings out where I've had to stay in another city for work purposes and not known anyone. There are always mners willing to come and have wine, and within minutes it feels like you've known them for years.

exoticfruits Sat 13-Apr-13 08:42:17

The answer is to make people search for topics rather than to have them all instantly accessible.
The answer with journalists is not to have AIBU the prominent thing that pops up if you Google mumsnet.

Badvoc Sat 13-Apr-13 08:55:08

Agree with your second pont exotic

Tee2072 Sat 13-Apr-13 09:00:19

"The answer with journalists is not to have AIBU the prominent thing that pops up if you Google mumsnet."

Not in MNHQ's control, Google indexes by hit counts. AIBU has lots of hits. It's going to come up first on Google.

TheDoctrineOfSnatch Sat 13-Apr-13 09:03:50

Knotty has a "do you need...?" thread running in Chat, they come up every so often and people are always very generous smile

catsrus Sat 13-Apr-13 09:17:25

I found MN by accident when I was googling for some info 2 yrs ago. I'd heard of it but imagined it was dull and wifey grin. I've been a member of lots of online groups for over 20yrs (since before the Web!) and this is the most amazing resource full of the most amazing people.

I was in the middle of a divorce at that point - and found I could make so much more sense of my ex and the reasons for him leaving when I found about about NPD and in particular 'the script' used when a man exits a marriage.

I've watched MNs support each other through births, deaths, marriages, divorces, breakdowns - I've had my own views seriously challenged (in particular in FWR) and am much clearer now about where I stand and why. Most recently I've been on the thread supporting L after her H left and turned out to have a pregnant mistress, we watched L while she coped with that and dealt with her own pregnancy and now birth.

There are people who I will never meet who are forever stuck in my mind, what happened to the lovely mum leaving the abusive "pillar of the community" dh who went home to Northern Ireland? I hope she and her children are happy and healthy. I've cried at the death of children I never met but whose names will stay with me, Beatrice, Mia, Ailidh.

We've got something very special here, long may it continue.

Mama1980 Sat 13-Apr-13 09:32:33

Personally I have found this site amazing. Last year I was advised to terminate my pregnancy for medical reasons through the support on here I decided not to (thanks again mrs devere grinyou have no idea how much I thank you for your advice and support) my son was born at 24 weeks discharged two weeks ago happy and healthy. The ladies on my ante natal thread are a constant support of advice and hand holding I would be lost without them. (April ladies smile)
Oh and also the foodie ladies have Been great with offering recipes and vitamin advice following my emergency hysterectomy and subsequent inability to eat.
I've received universally helpful advice.

exoticfruits Sat 13-Apr-13 09:36:46

I think it can be changed. I would suggest to MNHQ that they look at the teacher's talk on TES. Teachers are certainly forthright in their views and yet they have a place for help and a place for support and journalists are not going to Google in and immediately see the worst!
Rather than me explain it go to here
You can put in a key word search that helps-it also tells you the popular forums. It is then split and you can't scroll down active. It means that you stick to your interests. e.g. if you are a special needs teacher you use that forum to give and ask advice and it is enormously helpful. You might go on if you were a parent of SN child, or like me a supply teacher who came across a situation and wanted help. No one is going to stray in making unhelpful comments. I used to use the supply teacher forum, very helpful on support or just to find sympathy after a bad day. On the odd occasion you get teachers venting about 'useless supply teachers-but it is very rare-that isn't what it is for.
If you want lively debate then you go to opinion or have your say. If you have a baby and want to get back to work there is a baby and toddler one and you won't find anyone bumbling in to say it is wrong for the baby!
Everything is there-book clubs, TAs, cover supervisors, unemployed teachers, school trips, personal and you can even post in Welsh BUT you have to search the forums you don't just scroll down and see it all. A journalist can't make the instant opinion that there are a lot of angry teachers-it would take a lot of work to come to that conclusion.
It isn't good enough to say it isn't in MNHQ control. They could change AIBU for a start to 'opinion' or 'have your say' because AIBU generally means the person is being totally unreasonable and people jump in and say so-and not all do it politely! Do MNHQ really want this as the gateway to the site so that they have to then ask people to tell of the kind side? The kind side should shine out.
I have never been mauled on TES the way I have on here!

IAmSheWhoMustBeObeyed Sat 13-Apr-13 09:49:45

One of the first threads I read here was started in 2008 by a mother, a new poster, who's baby girl had recently died in her sleep. The funeral had not taken place yet. Very sensitive and supportive posters helped her through that terrible time.
I was frankly amazed and awed that so many people came and gave of themselves to help a complete stranger on the www.
Now I have seen blanket threads and threads where people have turned up to clean houses, bereavement threads, relationship threads and mental health threads and I am no longer surprised but still awed.

SoupDragon Sat 13-Apr-13 10:01:12

journalists are not going to Google in and immediately see the worst

Do you think journalists visit MN via google? I don't, I think they browse it freely. It is a far more popular and well known site than TES and I imagine that if a journalist wants something they just come and look at MN directly.

MrsDeVere Sat 13-Apr-13 10:03:03

mama oh what lovely news that your little boy is home! How are YOU?
Are you home too? I don't want to gush at you but I am always amazed at your fortitude and humour. You have been through so much.

I forgot to mention earlier that MN Doghouse is responsible for the new addition to my family.

A very cute little romanian street dog is lying on my bed with her very MN Cath Kidston collar on grin

Picking up on exotic's post I've wondered if there could be mileage in a WWYD (what would you do ?) topic, to kind of go alongside AIBU.

It might bring out the strengths of Mumsnet more in terms of the support and advice already so generously given throughout the site ?

Moominsarehippos Sat 13-Apr-13 10:06:56

Mama! Sob sniff snooooork. That's beautiful!

Juggling there is one, called exactly that

BIWI Sat 13-Apr-13 10:08:01

I thought there already was a WWYD topic?

CuttedUpPear Sat 13-Apr-13 10:08:41

Convert mentioned my thread where I was looking for help getting medicine to my friend. She lived a hundred miles away from me and was having chemo for breast cancer. The treatment had made her hands and face swell up like balloons. She needed Piriton but couldn't get out of the house. I knew that Mumnet would help if they could.

I posted on here and within an hour had three practical offers of help from MNetters in north London. Zonedout, Heliumballoon and Mumofjust1.

Zonedout had some Piriton but couldn't leave her DC's. So she kindly sent it with a cab driver round to my friend's address. The poor driver must have thought she was bonkers but delivered the bottle to my swollen, tired and confused friend (who had never heard of mumsnet) with some trepidation. In her words "I looked like the elephant man and the driver looked terrified!"

My friend was overwhelmed - this was at the hardest part of her treatment and she wasn't coping well with the side effects. The Piriton eased the swelling and within half an hour she could breathe with ease again.
Zonedout wouldn't accept any money for her troubles.

This was almost a year ago and my friend has made a great recovery. She is back in the workplace and has moved house to my side of the country. She will never forget the night she had a knock on the door and found MN goodwill being delivered!

BIWI Sat 13-Apr-13 10:09:42

OK, thanks BIWI - still it could perhaps be more prominent or better used ?
The popularity and prominence of AIBU could be a problem in terms of how we're initially perceived by lazy journos ?!
Perhaps I'll start a thread in WWYD about my on-going nightmare heating probs !

Lessthanaballpark Sat 13-Apr-13 10:26:45

Wot, so women can't disagree with each other without being called vipers?

Personally I've had a lovely time on Mumsnet and it's definitely made a positive contribution to my life, from getting advice on how to deal with aspects of DS's Aspergers to the fantastic Let Toys Be Toys campaign that grew out of FWR.

The wonderful thing about Mumsnet is that there will always be someone who sees things the way you do and this makes you feel slightly less alone in the world.

Plus, Mumsnetters are hilarious!! Does anyone remember that brilliant 50 Shades of Grey thread a while? It had me PMSLing for days.

And over all of Mumsnet we have the lovely MNHQ, residing over us like a Mother Hen, dropping in with their posts every now and again to let us know they're looking after us!!!

Long Live Mumsnet!!!

zzzzz Sat 13-Apr-13 10:29:02

I'm going to buck the trend and say I don't think there is any major issue with the SN boards. We do get the occasional idiot, but our radars are quite well tuned and HQ respond on the whole very promptly and decisively.

Unpleasantness about/towards SN tends to occur on the main boards and there are plenty of MNSNers who do not venture out of the SN boards at all because of that. For those of us that do the incidence of fuckwittage is reducing and certainly less than in RL.

HQ do not let disablist posts stand anymore, and that clear message has gone a long way to changeing things.

There are many many disabled children receiveing a much improved education as a result of the information given on the SN boards. Their lives have been changed for the better for ever.

AmberLeaf Sat 13-Apr-13 10:51:40

Posting again to say I agree with zzzzz last post.

I've been reading the thread though and am saddened to see that several posters have experienced problems on SN threads. It sounds as though this area is singled out more than some others by trolls and vicious posters. I'm really concerned to read this, and I think most MN would agree that it's appalling

I really don't think this is true actually. As far as I'm aware SN is 'opt in' and there are very few incidents of trollery on there. As someone else said, any 'trouble' tends to be on the main boards. MNHQ tend to delete disablist posts rather than going for the 'educate' line these days.

As I mentioned earlier, I have been heartened by posters who despite having no personal interest have stood up and challenged disablist views/posts.

I know that many MNers have had their eyes opened and have said what they have learned on here has made them think/act differently.

There are a handful of posters who dont/didnt feel their needs were/are met on The SNs boards and I'm not going to minimise their experiences by saying there are no issues, but I don't think any of it comes from a place of malice.

My personal views/feelings are very different from some other SN users, but I have still found it helpful and supportive and accept that different people will have different methods for coping and that is fine.

I really feel strongly and protective over the issue of the SN boards, because as zzzzz says, a great many children have benefitted from the advice and support found there.

Parents of children with SNs/disabilities are not one homogenous group, we are as different and varied as any other group of people with one common denominator, so it would be unrealistic to expect everyone to think/feel the same.

Overall the SN boards are a positive attribute to MN.

exoticfruits Sat 13-Apr-13 10:51:51

If I enter the site most days via Google I would imagine that journalists do too.
Topics are not easy to find. When I was told that the thread I was looking for was on bereavement I had difficulty-I found it under body and soul, which is logical, but at the top style and beauty is what you see. Do those living abroad know they have a special section? It is under homes and gardens which doesn't seem the place. I know that HEers often miss the fact they have a special place.
I think the whole thing needs a revamp.
Of course TES isn't as popular as MN there are far more parents in the country than teachers. If you are not a teacher you wouldn't get a lot from it.
On the Jeremy Vine show it appeared to me that Justine was a bit vague on the supportive side (maybe just my impression) hence asking this question. If the site was signed differently I am sure that the kind side would come over better-rather than the first impression being bunfights on AIBU.

SoupDragon Sat 13-Apr-13 10:59:01

I have never entered MN via Google. I don't understand why any regular would TBH - you just go to the web address/bookmark. Or, if you have googled, you just click the link to "talk" that it brings up. [shrug]

Of course TES isn't as popular as MN So I don't understand the comparison confused With fewer members, of course the atmosphere nd profile is going to be different.

Anyhow, this isn't what this thread is about.

MintyyAeroEgg Sat 13-Apr-13 11:01:39

I have been posting on Mumsnet since 2006 and would say that the good hugely outweighs the bad on here and any publication which says otherwise is simply guilty of lazy journalism.

zzzzz Sat 13-Apr-13 11:03:44

AIBU and the odd yoni thread <posted originally in style and beauty oh the joy!> remind me that having a filthy mind and being a bit arsey behind my revolting Doris Day facade is mercifully quite normal.

My inner viper rejoices!

Oh my!

AmberLeaf Sat 13-Apr-13 11:10:09

I would also like to add that I appreciate MNHQs efforts to put things right and to try to make it better. They have a difficult job as it is very hard to please everyone!

But they do listen IME.