Crucial biscuit question - which are posher: Rich Teas or Custard creams?

(285 Posts)
JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 13:26:40

We're split down the middle at HQ and it's more important than you think!

SoupDragon Thu 02-Jul-09 13:27:19

Good lord, neither are posh!

voda860 Thu 02-Jul-09 13:27:46


harleyd Thu 02-Jul-09 13:28:16

rich teas deffo

most bizarre question ive heard all morning...and ive got 4 kids asking me weird stuff today grin

FabBakerGirlIsBack Thu 02-Jul-09 13:28:17


CC are vile.

RT are trying to be afternoon tea-ey gentile but failing dismally.

artichokes Thu 02-Jul-09 13:28:30

When I had tea with an Earl he served Rich Teas but there wasn't a custard cream in sight. Does that help?

hazeyjane Thu 02-Jul-09 13:30:00

I'm not sure either are posh

I would say a choco leibnitz is a posh biscuit and a bourbon is dead common

<obviously both/all biscuits are lovely - apart from Rich Tea which is like eating sweet MDF>

Mamazon Thu 02-Jul-09 13:30:02

CC are minging and not at all posh.
rich tea are just boring and plain and show a distinct lack of imagination.

JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 13:30:44

Yes we know neither are posh SD! That wasn't the question...

Ok put it another way then - which are more dirt common?

FabBakerGirlIsBack Thu 02-Jul-09 13:31:35


neither ... but rich tea do at least have dullness simplicity in their favour, whereas custard creams have a fun-tackiness - linked to theb desire to take the sarni apart and lick off the cream. I can imagine an ad agency (or similar) offering custard creams out of a sense of retro-chic. BUT custard creams are also tackier. God it's really tricky isn't it?

fruitstick Thu 02-Jul-09 13:32:33

I'd go for rich tea.

CC definitely an economy biscuit.
Rich Tea, whilst certainly not out to impress, could potentially show an understated class against the glitzy showiness of a taste the difference cookie.

May I suggest the Digestive?

I think you need to further define 'posh' - landed gentry posh, nouveau riche posh?
<this is bugging me now>

SoupDragon Thu 02-Jul-09 13:33:19

Custard creams would appear to be marginally more expensive than rich tea. However, you can buy a bigger pack of CC then you can RT, thus making them cheaper than RT. Also, you can buy Tesco's Value RT in a separate pack, but if you want value CCs you need to buy a "biscuit barrel" pack which included Nice, Malted Milk and Bourbons as well.

which proves that, er, I have too much time on my hands....


Iklboo Thu 02-Jul-09 13:33:37

Unless you want an MN wide custard cream shortage PLEASE don't open them when I'm around blush

voda860 Thu 02-Jul-09 13:33:46

CC are a bit "bling" with their fancy sides, so they err on chav

<rushes back to V chat>

JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 13:34:17

No you may NOT suggest Digestives Fruitstick!

fruitstick Thu 02-Jul-09 13:35:08

I would also say the rich tea finger is more classy than the round one.

This is keeping me from important tidying

BCNS Thu 02-Jul-09 13:35:42

rich tea

custard creams are for pseudo snobs

GingerIgnoramus Thu 02-Jul-09 13:36:02

both vile

Bucharest Thu 02-Jul-09 13:36:29

If you closed your eyes and ate a bourbon or a custard cream, or any of those other cheapy creamy ones, you'd think they were all one- which they obviously are, with a bit of nasty colouring added....
So it must be Rich Tea. Though I'd wager a Morning Coffee posher still than a Rich Tea.

Choco-Leibniz most definitely the phwoarrrr-better-than-sex biscuit. With really chunky Boasters a close second.....

yappybluedog Thu 02-Jul-09 13:37:02

well, i always judge a biscuits poshness on the ones that children won't choose

so deffo Rich Tea, in this instance

hazeyjane Thu 02-Jul-09 13:37:59

I guess rich tea are a bit posher than custard creams (or cricket biscuits as they are know in our house, for some reason they are prized above all other biscuits!), and I know a lot of mums who would balk at giving their lo's a custard cream but don't mind a rich tea, because they are boring less sugary.

castlesintheair Thu 02-Jul-09 13:38:08

Both are decidely un-posh but if you had to choose, I'd say RT have a very slight edge.

Roobie Thu 02-Jul-09 13:38:27

Of the two, definitely the custard creams. A cult classic.

If in doubt, rich tea. Just because there's so little difference between the cheap ones and the branded.

Ooh, can I <gavel> please?

Damn you MN, I have to go and buy biscuits now angry

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 13:40:16

I'm thinking rich tea are slightly posher too.

JackBauer Thu 02-Jul-09 13:40:21

Hmmm, Rich Tea is posher, agree that CC are a bit too bling to be posh.

What on earth is going on in MN Towers?

melmog Thu 02-Jul-09 13:41:25

Neither of them are posh.

But why would anyone want a rich tea if there are custard creams on offer?

GetOrfMoiLand Thu 02-Jul-09 13:41:27

Think they are both a bit charlady common, ackcherly <awaits banishment from site>

I think you need to buy something like Butter Thins from Fortnum & Mason to qualify as posh.

Agree that Choco Liebniz and Boasters are the luscious biscuits of choice, but only if you scran the whole packetful at a time. Not for sharing dear god no.

fruitstick Thu 02-Jul-09 13:42:11

Have been giving this some more thought. If you are thinking in terms of a meeting scenario, the rich tea does require dunking which may place it below the custard cream.

ilovesprouts Thu 02-Jul-09 13:42:28

ooh rich tea smile

GingerIgnoramus Thu 02-Jul-09 13:43:49

RICH TEAS are like a plain tuile kind of biscuit

cc are deffo chavvy


GeraldineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 13:43:51

Ok, this time Garabaldis and fig rolls. So neither posh but which is less posh?

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 13:44:18

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GetOrfMoiLand Thu 02-Jul-09 13:44:29

Dunking <thud>

For preference, I would have a custard cream. Why would you eat a Rich Tea, they are like eating paving slabs. Vile.

Why don't you really push the boat out and get some chocolate digestives (plain choc though <controversial>)

yappybluedog Thu 02-Jul-09 13:44:43

that's difficult, that is

I would say fig roll less posh

GingerIgnoramus Thu 02-Jul-09 13:45:18

But you are not posh.
posh people like ME have black tea and plain biscuits

its like any adornement is rough

yappybluedog Thu 02-Jul-09 13:45:30

nothing more delish than plain choc digestives

GingerIgnoramus Thu 02-Jul-09 13:45:34

listen MN HQ
go for plain to be posh

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 13:45:39

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GingerIgnoramus Thu 02-Jul-09 13:45:58
RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 13:46:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ActivityApple Thu 02-Jul-09 13:50:45

The plainer the posher - CC's are a bit 'new money' frankly. If you really want posh, get cook to whip you up some shortbread <goes back to Horse and Hound>

melmog Thu 02-Jul-09 13:51:06

Yes, garibaldi def posher.

Fig rolls better.

In the biscuit world, posh does not mean better.

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 13:51:26

Garibaldis are more common than figrolls, because I can imagine being able to buy a couple of them in cellophane at a service station. So figrolls are marginally posher.

GingerIgnoramus Thu 02-Jul-09 13:52:30

oi justine
have i missed a webchat

yappybluedog Thu 02-Jul-09 13:54:03

If a biscuit is named after an Italian national military hero, then by default it is posh

squeaver Thu 02-Jul-09 13:54:16

Good logic, BoF. But it really is marginal because you can imagine someone eating either of them and thinking "this is one of my 5 a day".

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 13:55:57


RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 13:56:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Boco Thu 02-Jul-09 13:56:26

Garibaldis are least posh because you have to do self-separating, they don't even come ready separate. And people invariably make a mess of it and you get only half a biscuit, or a corner missing. Fig rolls are not posh but at least there's no mauling to be done.

And rich tea posher than custard creams because the cream bit is scutter.

fortyplus Thu 02-Jul-09 13:56:53

yappybluedog - yes but they're also known as 'squashed fly biscuits' which is downright disgusting, not posh! grin

TabithaTwitchet Thu 02-Jul-09 13:57:06

None of them are posh. But Rich Teas are posher than custard creams, and fig rolls (although absolutely vile-tasting) are posher than garibaldi's

Boco Thu 02-Jul-09 13:57:47

Can we have a webchat with the waitrose biscuit buyer to discuss this? Are garibaldies even sustainable? Where are they farmed fgs?

seeker Thu 02-Jul-09 13:58:02

Carr's water biscuits
Bath Olivers
Langues du Chat

These are all posh biscuits.

squeaver Thu 02-Jul-09 13:58:49

yes forget the fish, it's the biscuits that matter, fgs!!

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:00:30

< reads Reality's post >

< cancels plans for a proper dinner >

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:00:34

< reads Reality's post >

< cancels plans for a proper dinner >

GeraldineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 14:01:00

Justine says no one has ever heard of Tunnocks Caramel Wafers! Right or wrong?

harleyd Thu 02-Jul-09 14:02:24

tunnocks caramel wafers rock!

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 14:02:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:02:41

Yes, I know those! Tunnocks teacakes are nicer though. If a leetle common as well...

CMOTdibbler Thu 02-Jul-09 14:02:51

Rich tea are posher than cc. Garibaldis posher than fig rolls

My Ds thinks that my dad is amazing cos he has a packet of custard creams by the bed, and lets DS eat them in their bed.

I want the Waitrose Free From team on to talk about the important things like why don't they do a decent GF jammy dodger

seeker Thu 02-Jul-09 14:03:18

Tunnocks Caramel Wafers (and their lesser known siblings, Tunnock's Caramel Logs) are the biscuits of the Gods. But they are not posh!

squeaver Thu 02-Jul-09 14:03:23

HOW can she say such a thing?? Clearly she is not Scottish or knows anyone who is. Hasn't she read the wrapper where it is 5 billion are sold ever minute of some such thing??

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 14:04:03

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fruitbeard Thu 02-Jul-09 14:04:24

Tunnocks are lush.

I'm just waiting for BonsoirAnna to find this thread and tell us what the posh nobs are snacking on in Paris.... or don't they do anything so common as eat biscuits over there?wink

Boco Thu 02-Jul-09 14:04:28

Whaaat? Does Justine have heat stroke? Everyone has heard of tunnocks caramel wafers - what other biscuit gets policeman simulating oral sex in the street?

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:04:52

Here Om nom nom

LupusinaLlamasuit Thu 02-Jul-09 14:05:22

Wrong! Tunnocks caramel wafers are baby led weaning food where I come from. Hence all the cavities too. grin

TCW - I know of these beauties nom nom nom, especially the plain chocolate ones <scoffs the whole packet>

squeaver Thu 02-Jul-09 14:06:43

No only madelaines, surely fruitbeard.

LupusinaLlamasuit Thu 02-Jul-09 14:06:43

And <splutters> by the way: Choco Leibniz are NOT posh. They are very nouveau Hyacinth Bucket.

Wot Seeker said are yer actual posh.

HelenMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 14:06:45

OK, now for the REALLY important one....

Jammie Dodgers versus Party Rings?

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:06:52

My om nom nom was to the wafers, not the policemen and oral sex, btw.

squeaver Thu 02-Jul-09 14:07:54

SEE! 4 million sold every week. And look what a healthy nation it is!

LupusinaLlamasuit Thu 02-Jul-09 14:08:09

Jammy Dodgers though probably edge it with their retro appeal (Wayne Hemingway would choose them for example). Party Rings a bit nouveau too (although taste nicer)...

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:08:13

Oh I LOVE party rings. They are nicer, and a bit posher, in an ironic postmodern way perhaps?

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 14:08:25

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Boco Thu 02-Jul-09 14:08:25

Jammie dodgers and party rings neck and neck - both are extremely posh.

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:09:31

Now Lupus, I was thinking on the same lines as you, but I was thinking Wayne would choose party he the litmus?

Custard Creams are common next to Rich Tea! but neither are what I'd call posh!

JackBauer Thu 02-Jul-09 14:09:57

Ooh, that's a tough one,

Jammie Dodgers are not posh, but posher than party rings I think.

I would say Garibaldo posher than Fig roll but it's close,
I ahve never heard of Tunnocks caramel wafers but was a deprived child and brought up on homemade biscuits.

fruitstick Thu 02-Jul-09 14:10:01

Always the Dodgers as I would say party rings are strictly a children's food (party, if you will) which adults may may only eat if a child is nearby whereas the Jammy Dodger is multigenerational.

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:11:52

See fruitstick, that's why I thought Wayne would like them. And they are neater to eat.

jumpingbeans Thu 02-Jul-09 14:11:58

no bisquit is posh when you have left in your tea to long and half falls on your t-shirt

HelenMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 14:12:58

lol at Wayne The Litmus.

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:13:44

Boco, that has to be the funniest advert I have ever seen gringringrin

LupusinaLlamasuit Thu 02-Jul-09 14:14:04

Party Rings are not neater to eat. the nuclear icing shatters and drops bits all down your cleavage <empirical research evidence>

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:14:17

I bet Reality is doing that right now...

Cadelaide Thu 02-Jul-09 14:14:40

rich tea, garibaldis and jammie dodgers

Cadelaide Thu 02-Jul-09 14:15:21

tunnocks dead common

HelenMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 14:15:46

And <raises bar> posh or not, packet or plate?

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 14:15:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:17:10

It's got to be plate- a plate is posh and pretentious, hence common at the same time.

theITgirl Thu 02-Jul-09 14:17:53

I am sorry but you cannot have a posh biscuit from a pack (unless to go with cheese). To be posh it has to be homemade.

Lilymaid Thu 02-Jul-09 14:17:58

I know Old Etonians who eat Tunnocks, so they are not class-defined.
I think that HQ needs to consult the Oracle of Biscuits.

Cadelaide Thu 02-Jul-09 14:18:02

A bit of chipped fine bone china, royal worcester or something, both posh and common.

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 14:18:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cadelaide Thu 02-Jul-09 14:19:00

I see we agree on the plate issue BitOfFun grin

squeaver Thu 02-Jul-09 14:19:43

If Wayne is the litmus at one end of the scale, surely Kirstie is at the other end?

LovelyRitaMeterMaid Thu 02-Jul-09 14:19:57

Haven't read rest of thread but neither are posher.

I would say rich tea are nicer. DC would say custard creams.

Boco Thu 02-Jul-09 14:21:58

Not packet or plate but TIN

MrsMattie Thu 02-Jul-09 14:22:35

Custard creams are common as muck and strictly for kids or biddies.

They remind me of my afterschool club when I was a kid (it was common), where we'd get a luke warm beaker of Kiora and a supermarket own brand custard cream grin

Rich tea are quite common, too. And they taste like sawdust.

You need a box of nice biscuits to be posh, dahlings.

LupusinaLlamasuit Thu 02-Jul-09 14:24:51

I think you need morningpaper, justabout, Iorek, habbibu etc: didn't they have a loooong spiritual discussion about biscuits one time?

LupusinaLlamasuit Thu 02-Jul-09 14:26:32
BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:26:35

Wayne Hemingway is retro Pseud chic though- closer to Kirstie than Wayne Rooney, for example.

LupusinaLlamasuit Thu 02-Jul-09 14:27:34

Custard Creams very Anglican apparently. According to one MP...


Does that help at all?

fishie Thu 02-Jul-09 14:27:38

tunnocks are not common they are an authentic artisanal scottish product and they sell them in waitrose.

LovelyRitaMeterMaid Thu 02-Jul-09 14:28:09

Actually no, custard creams are more common.

CMOTdibbler Thu 02-Jul-09 14:29:01

<sulks as needs a party ring and they don't do gluten free ones>

Hassled Thu 02-Jul-09 14:29:04

Both equally common.

slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 14:30:30

wtf, are you writing an article for the DM, HQ? Or what?

hatwoman Thu 02-Jul-09 14:33:10

you know what the best thing about this thread is? as far as I can see no-one has queried why mn needs to know. everyone's waded in with their opinions. we really would do anything for mn.

if this is an mn-towers competition to see who can come up with the most ridiculous question and get the most answers my trust will be severely eroded...

squeaver Thu 02-Jul-09 14:33:37

Nah, they're all pissed (again)

hatwoman Thu 02-Jul-09 14:33:49

slyandgoob sneaked in there before I pressed post.

slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 14:34:07

yy, hatwoman's point...
Stop toying with us HQ

SoupDragon Thu 02-Jul-09 14:34:45

Is it a slow day at MN Towers?

squeaver Thu 02-Jul-09 14:36:23

Actually, I bet they've got someone in from McVities and they're using phrases like "enhanced branding opportunities" and "dissemination of key messages"

HelenMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 14:36:31

All will be revealed in due course, we promise <cryptic>

<passes Gerry a Choco-Lebnitz while Justine's not looking>

Surely any biscuit with its name printed on it is to be sniffed at?

You make them yourself and arrange them on a delicate bone china plate with a doyley (sp?). At least thats what FILs desperately pretentious gf does!

Custard Creams definately, but then Oreos are better.

slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 14:37:41

Most of these biscuits are terrible . Except anything by tunnocks.
Is too hot for biscuits also. What about a thread about ice cream?

squeaver Thu 02-Jul-09 14:37:48

Yes, Kirstie is prob closer to Wayne but surely she would be able to detect the closest thing to "home-made" (while not actually doing it herself)

out of the 2, I would say Rich teas are less common than Custard Creams

slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 14:39:02

Also we all know you live on sprouts and humous at HQ and have to clean up any crumbs with one of those mini-Henrys...

PuzzleRocks Thu 02-Jul-09 14:39:36

We keep a pack of Tunnocks Caramel wafers in the pantry for FIL visits. He's quite posh.

Personally I like Maryland cookies but then I am shamelessly vulgar.

hatwoman Thu 02-Jul-09 14:39:36

I absolutely forbid a thread about ice cream. I have just eaten a mountain of chocolate and if we start talking about ice cream I'll have to go to the ice cream shop and clog my artieries up even more.

SoupDragon Thu 02-Jul-09 14:40:16

Plate BTW. Or better still, a biscuit tin/jar.

SoupDragon Thu 02-Jul-09 14:40:39

chocolate digestive: milk or plain?

slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 14:41:21

Maryland only work if you soak them in quite a lot of tea, ime.
I'd like a nice chocolate milkshake, wouldn't you, hatwoman? Or.... a coke float... Or a really nice iced coffee with icercream in it.

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 14:42:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

arrowroots are a refined choice

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:45:58

I bet you didn't get many for egg mayonnaise.

fruitstick Thu 02-Jul-09 14:46:22

Plate signifies meanness as you are signifying that you have more biscuits than you are prepared to offer.

A packet indicates that you are such a gluten they never have chance to go off or don't care about crumbs everywhere.

Therefore - tin.

hullygully Thu 02-Jul-09 14:46:38


slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 14:47:33

I know I know - thsi whole thread will go on and on and on, with HQ throwing us the odd hook, and then, lightly edited, will hit the shops as the Mumsnet Guide to Biscuits

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:47:41

Oooh, fruitstick, impeccable logic...have you ever considered writing an etiquette book?

Katisha Thu 02-Jul-09 14:48:08

I reckon by definition biscuits aren't really posh.

But if a biscuit is to have any pretensions to poshness it must be plain and dull looking. And probably should taste of almonds.

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 14:48:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fruitstick Thu 02-Jul-09 14:49:13

I may well bitoffun

Although I did of course mean glutton not gluten!

slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 14:49:40

That surprises me about tuna and cucumber - the cucumber actually makes the tuna taste too fishy in my view.

GumsNRoses Thu 02-Jul-09 14:50:35

Plate!!! you should display your rich tea and party rings on a silver platter, have you no class hmm

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:50:56

Oh but tinned salmon and cucumber...that is the sandwich of kings, surely < salivates >

Justine OBVIOUSLY rich teas
I can't believe you have to ask <tsk>


GumsNRoses Thu 02-Jul-09 14:52:41

ooooooh BOF you rotter <runs to shop for tin of salmon and a cue> grin

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:52:54

pmsl at slyandgobbo - only just saw that grin

slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 14:53:03

See now, two threads for teh price of one HQ. If you fillet this thread carefully, you can get the Mumsnet Guide to Sandwiches and the MN Guide to Biscuits out of it!

tinned salmon?
boak boak boak
I get it for the dog sometimes - it smells like rancid cat food

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 14:54:02

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 14:54:54


RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Thu 02-Jul-09 14:55:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ShePeeTeePee Thu 02-Jul-09 14:56:36

Is that a dunked or undunked Rich Tea biscuit?

Bramshott Thu 02-Jul-09 14:56:58

Well, if you have to ask . . .

Madsometimes Thu 02-Jul-09 14:58:44

Rich Teas are posher. I was courted by being offered a custard cream. I am really common.

GIvePeasAChance Thu 02-Jul-09 15:00:36

So long as neither are from a 25p for a 100 'value' range, and are McVities, then either will do for a cuppa with your neighbour. Posh would be stretching it. But a lack of hydrogenated fats is always a bonus when aiming for posh.

slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 15:01:06

I have long thought that custard creams were the biggest waste of calories ever invented.

snigger Thu 02-Jul-09 15:21:38

Rich tea. Custard is common. Creme anglais bakes, they should be, if you want posh.

snigger Thu 02-Jul-09 15:25:31

Having just skimmed the rest of the thread, I also want to add that although neither fig-rolls nor Garibaldi are posh, Garibaldi are man-biscuits, and therefore below my personal radar regardless of status.

Seriously, name me anyone without hairy knuckles that eats Garibaldi for pleasure?

pinkpetunia Thu 02-Jul-09 15:30:57

Prince Charles' lemon biscuits are quite refined.

Camilla makes them herself, bless 'er grin

SammyK Thu 02-Jul-09 15:31:02

not read whole thread but they are both a bit common, I should know I was practicaly brought up on them grin

If you are needing biscuits at MN towers to impress visitors, those are not the ones you want to be considering.

JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 15:31:38

I'm too posh to know about Tunnocks...

JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 15:33:09

Gerry's got Jammy Dodgers, I've got Viscounts - need I say more hmm?

GetOrfMoiLand Thu 02-Jul-09 15:40:54

Christ this thread moved on...

Can I just mention Maryland Cookies - the ones in a purple packet. Best biscuits ever.

When I was a kid you used to be able to buy Maryland Cookies in a bag, that way you didn't have to tussle with a packet fgs, you could grab a handful of cookies at a time, a lot better way to eat biscuits I am sure you will agree.

Buda Thu 02-Jul-09 15:41:12

Do you lot know there are wars and things going on in the world and you are all here waffling away about the poshness or otherwise of biscuits. No wonder the world is in the state it is. Sigh.

I love custard creams. We can buy them here in Budapest in Tesco. With bourbons. And choc hob nobs and Nice biscuits and rich tea fingers. So I think that answers your question. The demographic of the Tesco customer here in Hungary cannot ever be described as posh. In fact the new Tesco near us runs free shuttle buses from real Eastern European style tower blocks.

They do also sell Choco Liebnitz too.

Tortington Thu 02-Jul-09 15:41:12

one needs to be technical with a question like this. Firstly we should define its purpose.

1) to look nice on a plate on a plate for guests

2) dunking

3) taste

4) method of eating

for a nice plain, understated biscuit for guests at MNHQ it should be the rich tea. It says " we have thought of you" rather than "try not to get crumbs on you tie/frilly blouse"

for dunking purposes again i have to vote rich tea. One cannot dunk a custard cream in earnest. The reason for the dunk is to get sufficient soak to bite ratio. There are better biscuits on the market for this purpose for example, the dunk of a plain chocolate digestive into ones brew leaves not only the corect soak to bite ratio - but also melted chocolate to leave a velvet satisfying blend in ones gob- but between these two rich tea it has to be

for taste one should choose the custard cream. it is far amiable to the palette than the dry basic rich tea. however there are better on the market ( see chocolate digestive above)

the most satisfying in terms of method of eating ( if chocolate digestive isn't in the running) is teh custard cream.

one must seperate the two biscuits - not causing breakage ( breakage spoils the experience) we are then left with a plain biscuit and a biscuit with the custard cream.

one must then eat the custard cream by scraping ones front teeth across the top. this gives small curls of cream in ones mouth and the gnawing sensation is pleasing.

the ain is to eat as much of the cream as possible without actually breaking the biscuit below. when we are left with a small amount on the biscuit - we must then begin to lick the remainder - however we must not break the biscuit below.

we are then left with two plain biscuits. you must eat one and give the other to the dog.

when applying these principles to jammy dodgers and ice rings

dodgers look nicer on a plate
ice rings look cheap and tacky

neither should be dunked

jammy dodgers wins on taste

and jammy dodger method of eating is similar to custard cream - hence wins.

in face the ice ring is an abomination to biscuit kind.

RustyBear Thu 02-Jul-09 15:41:33

Mint Viscounts are common. Orange ones are yummy....

Habbibu Thu 02-Jul-09 15:42:28

No, you're too English to know about Tunnocks, Justine...

Anyway, how about the rarely-spotted Chocolate Rich Tea?

Tortington Thu 02-Jul-09 15:42:47

for a fuller explaination one should see peter kay it is the biscuit bible

Habbibu Thu 02-Jul-09 15:43:12

I had forgotten the Theology of Biscuits, Lupus!

Tortington Thu 02-Jul-09 15:43:49

rich tea "one dips"

Habbibu Thu 02-Jul-09 15:43:52

and in fact fig rolls were the post-Mass biscuit of choice when I were a nipper.

Tortington Thu 02-Jul-09 15:44:39

hob nobs SAS of biscuit world

dawntigga Thu 02-Jul-09 15:46:55

custard creams - much better with tea


BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 15:49:54

Loving Custardo's summary grin

GetOrfMoiLand Thu 02-Jul-09 15:59:18

Any talk about dunking is an abomination and you should be ashamed of yourself grin. Honestly a thread about poshness of biscuits and people sully it with the dunking abberation.

Don't dunk your biscuits, it's a vile habit and you end up with soggy biscuit remnants at the bottom of your cuppa tea <shudder>

<puts soapbox away>

ShePeeTeePee Thu 02-Jul-09 16:00:39

ah, there you see. I can make any biscuit common by 'dunkin'' So maybe it's not what you eat but the way you eat it.... or the way you describe the act of eating it.

thumbwitch Thu 02-Jul-09 16:20:31

neither are remotely posh! but I'd sooner have a custard cream than a Rich Tea. Bourbons are posher, imo, but you have to get up to Viscounts before you're talking real class gringrin

My faves are Bahlsen's Choco Leibniz though. Dark.

JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 16:22:06

@hatwoman grin All will become clear - hopefully some time next week [mysterious].

Jammie Dodgers???
I think they use some petro-chemical process by-product for the jam in those
It tastes foul and very artificial
{mouth like cat's arse}

dinkystinky Thu 02-Jul-09 16:26:10

Custard creams were our builders' biscuit of choice - seriously they got through several packets a day when doing our bathroom - does that make them posh biscuits grin?

Think rich teas are slightly posher but of course milk chocolate hob nobs are the creme de la creme...

GetOrfMoiLand Thu 02-Jul-09 16:37:50

Does anyone remember Sports biscuits. Milky flavour biscuits with pictures of stick men doing various track and field sports on them. They were yum. Didn't actually see the point of the sports symbols, but still.

I loved them
they are the same as cow biscuits but with sports people

Swedes Thu 02-Jul-09 16:44:05

Rich Tea, Custard Creams are as common as moooook.

GetOrfMoiLand Thu 02-Jul-09 16:44:57

Don't remember the cow biscuits at all, but remember the excitement of the sports biscuit packet when I was young, bright green with corrugated cardboard liner, and the smell of the milky biscuits <proustian moment>

snigger Thu 02-Jul-09 16:45:24

Is no-one on here going to admit to eating crumbly-edged organic home-style 40p-per-inch biscuits?

I think chocolate cow biscuits are the very pinnacle of biscuit-production, those and apple-pie cookies - they have chewy dried apply bits and are guaranteed to break into rubble and land firmly down your cleavage, and they rub.

cow biscuits
you must remember them
they used to call them malted milk

look here

now they are cow biscuits


snigger Thu 02-Jul-09 16:50:18

I didn't realise they'd actually renamed them.

Tortington Thu 02-Jul-09 16:51:23

ooh i now remember chocolate animal biscuits - i never had them except at other kids houses cos mi mum was too tight

Swedes Thu 02-Jul-09 16:53:58

Justine - Everyone with a family sporting estate in the Highlands knows about Tunnocks.

Really the only bought biscuit with proper posh credentials is an oatcake. And for reminiscing about childhood, a toff might buy a packet of those little chocolate covered marshmallows (just like the governess used to serve after a coddled egg and soliders at high tea). They are always displayed beside the till in M&S, I think so Tory MPs and other ex boarders can pick up a packet as a perfect pick-me-up after their evening of auto-erotic asphyxiation.

damnhayfever Thu 02-Jul-09 16:56:34

no disagree rich tea deffo posher
sports bics great still very cheap
choc malted milk yum yum
chocolate leiboniz(however its spelt)poshest !

surely a chocolate orange would be more suitable

chocolate olivers are the poshest biscuits known to man I think you will find

damnhayfever Thu 02-Jul-09 16:58:26

or coop own make chocolate chip and stem ginger cookies

damnhayfever Thu 02-Jul-09 16:58:27

or coop own make chocolate chip and stem ginger cookies

snigger Thu 02-Jul-09 17:00:46

Biscuits in literature:

When I read What Katy Did At School, the tale of the Christmas box with a top layer of cake and 'Debbie's Jumbles' I wasted several weeks craving a jumble, despite not knowing what it was.

So, for me, jumbles are the biscuit of legend - I must google. I bet they're grim.

Swedes Thu 02-Jul-09 17:02:13

Countess - I think they're posh like Posh Spice is posh.

well they niver used to be
Have they been chavvified? A la burberry
<fans self>

Swedes Thu 02-Jul-09 17:04:17

Countess - grin @ chocolate orange

Swedes Thu 02-Jul-09 17:05:01

Yes, I think they are aspirational.

oh well fortunately I never buy them
I remember them being rather delicious though
fuck me they are a tenner shock

gibbberish Thu 02-Jul-09 17:12:17

lol at this. Well after careful consideration (of all of 2 seconds) I would ahve to say custard creams. Simply because rich tea are very boring. And I don't even like to dunk them in my tea. Mushy biscuits ugh.

lemonpuff Thu 02-Jul-09 17:13:25

My brothers use to call garabaldis 'dead fly biscuits'!! Guess which we had when it was my turn to chose....

gibbberish Thu 02-Jul-09 17:17:06

Oh and NOT fig rolls. And Jammie dodgers more posh.

Off to read the rest to see what other biscuit questions there are.

Why are you asking anyway? <curious>

gibbberish Thu 02-Jul-09 17:20:34

Oh I see, the answer will be revealed...

Anyway, plates are the poshest and tunnocks are gorgeous!

GetOrfMoiLand Thu 02-Jul-09 17:22:37

Malted Milk that's it!

I think Mumsnet are being visited on by minor royalty (Princess Michael of Kent, Countess of Wessex, Queen Juliana of the Netherlands?) and want to put on a posh spread.

snigger Thu 02-Jul-09 17:23:43

Is there a hostile takeover of McVities afoot?


Pollyanna Thu 02-Jul-09 17:27:05

I think only biscuits with cheese (carrs water biscuits for eg) are posh.

other biscuits are common.

I am partial to a nice bit of shortbread myself.

Bath olivers sound as though they should be posh.

YeahBut Thu 02-Jul-09 17:40:14

The only truly posh biscuit is homemade shortbread.
Rich tea posher than cc.
Garibaldi posher than fig roll.
Tunnocks caramel wafers are not biscuits, they are the food of Gods.

Gorionine Thu 02-Jul-09 17:43:25

Has to be Bourbons for me, Custard Cream are nice but I would be able to resist one. Resisting a Bourbon is impossible!

MaggieBeeBeau Thu 02-Jul-09 18:26:27

I remember thinking ooooooh you're quite posh aren't you when I was offered these the dark chocolate ones

MaggieBeeBeau Thu 02-Jul-09 18:27:29

sorry, my link didn't work. it's the liebniz dark chocolate biscuits. like a rectangular rich tea biscuit with dark choc on one side. Very posh.

ByThePowerOfGreyskull Thu 02-Jul-09 18:34:33

I think cc are common,
i think Rich tea are posher but saying that is like polishing a turd.

I think the frugal, slightly Spartan qualities of Rich Tea make em posher than the Custard Creams.

I don't think anyone has already linked to A Nice Cup of Tea and a Sit Down - the biscuit review archive but it's quite an important site.

FrannyandZooey Thu 02-Jul-09 18:37:18

i would say custard creams are a bit gay

ChippyMinton Thu 02-Jul-09 18:40:29

Having read the thread I propose the theory that the more scottish the biscuit, the posher it is - shortbread in order of complexity (ie petticoat tails, stamped with a thistle, fingers)followed closely by Tunnocks teacakes and caramel wafers.

yappybluedog Thu 02-Jul-09 18:45:11

It would NEVER occur to me to buy Tunnocks caramel wafers

Thats a choccy type bar thing surely, not a biscuit

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 19:01:22

What were those biscuits with three little blobs of marshmallow in two rows divided by a line of jam and sprinkled with dessicated coconut? It's been bugging me all afternoon...

slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 19:05:01

Those blobs of marshmallow biscuits are very gay. Can't remember what they are called. Fig rolls also gay. And party rings.

custard creams more common

slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 19:09:27

a website for the folk at HQ Orange clubs, mmmmm

Maggie, those are not posh, they are middle class aspirational biscuits. They are too German to be posh grin

slyandgobbo Thu 02-Jul-09 19:15:01

oops sorry, missed the previosu link. doh.

RedLentil Thu 02-Jul-09 19:20:05

BitofFun - they are Mikado biscuits and tis patriotic duty of all children here in Ireland to eat them and offer them to their grandmothers.

The less pretty, but more sophisticated Kimberley is near relation.

MaggieBeeBeau Thu 02-Jul-09 19:40:47

I'm not very patriotic. I think they're a bit spongey.

Mm interesting debate.

I don;t recall seeing ginger nuts on this thread...

The biscuits of choice here, posh or not, are chocolate covered Rich Teas. Yum.

morningpaper Thu 02-Jul-09 19:48:41

I used to give my first huband Tunnocks in his lunchbox

I don't have any further opinions though

I am slightly uncomfortable with the whole biscuit class system to be honest

I am more comfortable with biscuit theology

MaggieBeeBeau Thu 02-Jul-09 19:53:11

They are too chewy for me. I have to be in the right mood to chew. I prefer a nice piece of shortbread tbh

Goober Thu 02-Jul-09 19:55:14

Rich Tea deffo posher as you don't get the urge to open them up and lick and poke the cream like ya do with the custard cream.

morningpaper Thu 02-Jul-09 19:56:49

tunnocks are nice if you are vegetarian because you can chew them like a nice steak

MaggieBeeBeau Thu 02-Jul-09 19:56:58

Hey, do you ever nibble a tiny bit off each end of your chocolate finger, stick it in to your tea and suck up just enought tea so that the whole biscuit is tea-soaked, and then pop the lot into your gob/?

just me? hmm

Now I never kidded myself that that was posh

differentID Thu 02-Jul-09 19:57:28

Rich tea are posher, but not posh.

Nice biscuits are posher still.

fruitstick Thu 02-Jul-09 20:01:14

Maggie, you are a girl after my own heart. Only in the privacy of my own home you understand.

The day I teach DSs to do it will be an important one grin

and I give you the mikado

I thank you

BitOfFun Thu 02-Jul-09 20:14:36

Ah, they had a bakery in Liverpool- that will be why we used to have them so much as kids. I haven't noticed any in years sad

differentID Thu 02-Jul-09 20:34:54

I loathe Mikado- I'm not a fan of coconut.

Kimberley biscuits, however- different case completely.

LupusinaLlamasuit Thu 02-Jul-09 20:41:01

mikado, yum, spesh banana ones

I will have to say it again: Choco Leibniz are NOT POSH.

LupusinaLlamasuit Thu 02-Jul-09 20:41:40

Or maybe I am thinking of Pokky?

choco leibniz not posh?

DD2 advises- custard creams posher because of
1. baroque detailing
2. more components

suspect this is because of her time wasted on the 'nice cup of tea and a sit down website'.

MaggieBeeBeau Thu 02-Jul-09 20:50:23

yeah, I'm having difficulty processing the leibniz not posh revelation too.... shock

Party rings Not Vegetarian shock

MaryBS Thu 02-Jul-09 21:03:27

Neither are posh, they're common as muck!

wiggletastic Thu 02-Jul-09 21:03:51

Maggie, I was taught that trick on a Buddhist Retreat! Apparently its ^the done thing^ in Australia with a certain type of biscuit. I find it works best with a twix and I have taught it to everyone in work who all agree it is an excellent way to eat biscuits but probably not in front of your Granny! The inside goes all nice and soft and warm, the toffee goes gooey and the chocolate melts on the outside - its fab!

There is a certain technique to it though...

Twix straws are the way forward in biscuits IMO. grin

wuglet Thu 02-Jul-09 21:23:49

Anzac biscuits are nice, and posh in a old-lady-putting-them-on-a-doily way.

animal biscuits? <puts cat amongst pigeons with this site!!> party rings nice too!

midnightexpress Thu 02-Jul-09 21:24:14

Even I can't work my way through 244 posts on biscuits, but I would agree with whoever said that shortbread is frightfully posh compared with all other biscuits. Even Duchy Originals (in the same way that true aristos think that the Royal family are actually not all that posh).

Jux Thu 02-Jul-09 21:32:44

Rich tea deffo. But the poshest are Garibaldi.

Jojay Thu 02-Jul-09 21:40:17

Custard creams are as common as muck

ingles2 Thu 02-Jul-09 21:53:47

RT posher than CC
Garibaldi posher than fig rolls but both get left in biscuit barrel
JD posher than PR but there's nowt better than sucking the polyfilla off the top of a party ring

LupusinaLlamasuit Thu 02-Jul-09 21:54:47

Oh come on. Choco Leibniz are the Ferrero Rocher of the biscuit world.

Buddleja Thu 02-Jul-09 22:07:01

What custard creams are not vile or minging - how very dare you!!!

I don't think either are I think you might have to go down the hob nob (how is it spelt not posh enough to have any in the cupboard)

Actually now i think about it when we are talking in work about what biscuits we'd be if we were a biscuit one of the guys told me I'd be a Rich Tea because I'm posh (I'm posh merely because I'm english - DH almost wet himself laughing when I relayed this information to him - slightly offended I was!!)

Goober Thu 02-Jul-09 22:13:33

Asda Smartprice custard creams are the superiorerest of all custard creams! FACT!

4andnotout Thu 02-Jul-09 22:24:09

Neither are posh.

Custard creams are tastier than 'not enough spit in the world' Rich Teas.

Swedes Thu 02-Jul-09 22:26:51

Lupus - grin I agree Choco Leibniz are naff. Mannerschnitten are quite Von Posh in an Austro-Hungarian empire kind of way.

EccentricaGallumbits Thu 02-Jul-09 22:32:25

for uber-poshicity you'd have to go for a garibaldi or a fig roll. or something hand cooked from prince charles.

custard creams are a bit chevesque and rich teas are just middle aged and a bit dull.

digestives or hobnobs are more of a working man's biscuit.

nice or malted milk - middle class

choco leibniz are in the same league as a viscount or a kitkat. not really a biscuit at all.

I spend far too much time in the biscuit aisle.

Horton Thu 02-Jul-09 22:38:50

I think those little thin gingery ones with almonds in are quite posh. RT definitely posher than CC, though.

Florentines are quite posh as a tea accompaniment.

Doodle2u Thu 02-Jul-09 22:42:08

Rich Tea.

Custard Creams are just a poor substitute for a Bourbon Cream.

JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 22:45:03

Seems our consensus is that custard creams are the commonest biscuit of all, and Rich Tea are merely plain Janes. Thanks everyone (though you're all wrong). More on this to follow [woman of mystery emoticon].

LupusinaLlamasuit Thu 02-Jul-09 22:51:42

Does it involve free biscuits Justine? <hopeful>

JustineMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 02-Jul-09 23:02:36

Sadly no.

QuintessentialShadow Thu 02-Jul-09 23:04:38

ahhhh choco leibnitz.........

<swallows hard>

Let's be honest, quality people don't offer biscuits after 11am - for afternoon small cakes or shortbread should be served rather than biscuits (and no, Jaffa cakes don't count).

In extremis, I suppose you could crush the rich tea biscuits as a base for cheesecakes hmm.

Re: fig rolls, is this a vegetarian alternative to parma ham covered figs? grin

blithedance Thu 02-Jul-09 23:27:24

DH is from a posh family. He says that biscuits as a rule aren't posh at all (if posh you would serve small cakes).

Custard creams are the most downmarket as they are trying to be fancy (like souping up a Ford Escort).

(starting to feel outclassed here)

CKelpie Thu 02-Jul-09 23:38:35

Rich Teas are on a par white bread, custard creams are the Deliverance-Banjo-Boy of the biscuit world.

If you are going to do biscuits you want to find something with integrity like a Chocolate Hobnob.

What were those Peak Frean ones called? Two circles of biscuit, sandwiching a pink cream. Had a little hole in the middle of the top biscuit?

They were pretty horrible. But not as horrible as custard creams.

Now, Fox's Millionaire Caramel Shortbreads - there's a classy biscuit <drools>

LeninGrad Fri 03-Jul-09 00:13:57

Dunkability is the litmus test for me; if they break up they're no good, so custards win.

LeninGrad Fri 03-Jul-09 08:23:14

Which means RT must be posher because I'm sure posh people don't dunk biscuits in tea, or at least not when anyone is watching. I have no such shame.

Dunking is what we do with common witches Leningrad wink. Not with biscuits.

hatwoman Fri 03-Jul-09 12:34:56

well we had a complete disaster in the hat household last night. dh is still recovering from the awfulness of it all. he came home from Tesco's (and I reserve my right to have an apostrophe and an s on that) with shock PLAIN hob-nobs shock shock shock. he was devastated.

but there's a sliver lining - equally shocking - I have discovered that I prefer them shock. I don;t get it. I adore chocolate, but feel that plain hob nobs have a whole crumbly biscuity quality that the chocolate ones lack.

PuppyMonkey Fri 03-Jul-09 12:38:57

I like a nice Bronte biscuit myself. Does anyone else get Bronte biscuits... usually in a cafe? Dead, dead posh.

oh the suspense....
really wondering what this is all about

Habbibu Fri 03-Jul-09 13:19:29

Shortbread not posh up here - it's ubiquitous.

Shortbread is by it's nature posh though 50% butter, not your nasty riff raffy vegetable fat grin

May I widen the MNHQ search for class appropriate snacking pleasure to include tiffin? grin

Now Iced Gems and Pink 'n' Whites are very unposh.

Habbibu Fri 03-Jul-09 13:35:41

Nah - commoners make their shortbread with butter up here, wmmc - you can't move for the stuff, which makes it by definition common. But we also get shedloads of vension, and it's often cheaper than beef, so have maybe a different perspective on posh food...

I love venison. <wipes mouth politely with napkin after dribbling slightly>

I'm not sure I'd like shortbread made with it though [boak]

jemart Fri 03-Jul-09 14:01:05

For me custard creams are the most aspirational of the two, unless the rich tea biscuits are the chocolate covered ones.
Neither are posh really, you need some hand baked cookies/cream filled macaroons or similar for posh. Belgian chocolate butter cookies....mmmmm yummy.

So, where do these fit in? scratches head

Katisha Fri 03-Jul-09 14:25:54

This site, Gourmeton is helpful on all food matters I find...

notcitrus Fri 03-Jul-09 14:35:12

Rich teas - average. Too boring to bother eating, IMO.

Custard creams - so unposh that I once got a black eye from one that hit me in the face.
Took me a decade before I could eat another one... blush

MangoJuggler Fri 03-Jul-09 14:45:50

Cafe Noir are posh


Wheelybug Fri 03-Jul-09 14:52:49

Custard creams are definitely less posh. DH insists on having custard creams, bourbons and jammy dodgers in the house. If they're crawfords he's happiest. I call these his 'common biscuits'.

Me, being posher than dh obviously, bought cadburys chocolate digestives the other day and DH could not believe they were cadburys and not mcvities. He thought me the epitomy of posh. Its a good job I didn't buy green and blacks eh ?!

Mumsnut Fri 03-Jul-09 14:53:38

You need custard cremes to be really posh!

Creme Anglais biscuits <snurk> grin

Jux Sat 04-Jul-09 16:23:00

So what's it all about (Alfie)? Why are you asking us about biscuits, getting us into newspapers as mc airheads and telling us it's crucial?

We need to know [stern]

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