Starting Y11 support thread

[AtiaoftheJulii]

(Yeah, I'm procrastinating ....)

For all those with one or two (or more?) offspring going into year 11: controlled assessments, coursework, practicals, performances, GCSE revision (or not ...), being guinea pigs for the Maths and English 1to9 exams, choosing what to do next - schools/sixth form colleges/college/apprenticeships/BTECs/A levels and more - and generally being 15!

It's a tough year academically - in some ways harder than sixth form I think because there are just so many subjects and exams - and a tough year emotionally - not always mature enough to organise themselves, too old to have organisation imposed upon them!

Ds still has an MFL CA, a couple of science practical CAs, and two assessed drama performances, plus coursework to do for History I think. I can't see there's going to be much let up and he's definitely feeling the pressure I think he'll probably end up staying at his school for 6th form (he's very mathsy and his school is a good fit) but we may well look at a couple of sixth form colleges as he's already talking about whether he can go somewhere that won't feel quite so pushy.

[RaskolnikovsGarret]

I'm in! I've no idea what controlled assessments etc DD1 has, but she's not looking forward to the slog. It's been a fab summer, and neither she nor DD2 are thrilled at the prospect of going back tomorrow.

She will stay at her school, but has no idea which A levels to choose. My main concern is to stop her from over working and stressing this year. She is very hard on herself, and will see anything else other than a clean sweep of top grades as a failure.

[Fleurdelise]

I'm in! DS starting yr11 tomorrow, he's more preoccupied today of his hair cut than anything else. He's capable and predicted As and A*s but I suspect he'll get Bs if he's lucky considering the amount of effort it's needed for the good grades. So I'll swing from the feeling of despair back to hope back to despair for the next few months.

[Fleurdelise]

Oh, and with regards to controlled assements and so on DS doesn't even tell me what is going on at school until after it happened. So we generally have "oh, I had exams all week last week" on a Friday so as to make sure I can't pressure him into doing that annoying thing, you know, called revising. It will be tough...

[LittleHoHum]

DS has just started year 11. Off to a good start with just the right haircut.

GCSE's for ds and A2's for dd this year. It never stops.

[bigTillyMint]

I'm in too. And dreading the double whammy of GCSE's and A'levels.

DS has gone for a haircut today too, but doesn't start Y11 for 3 weeks! He has 2 weeks work experience starting next week first

[QueenofQuirkiness]

Dd1 starts Y11 on Wednesday. She's very conscientious and predicted all A*/8 but has anxiety issues so I'm a bit worried about what this year has to bring good luck to all dc's

[BertrandRussell]

Ds starts year 11 tomorrow.

He had his Statistics GCSE and BTec Sport Science results this summer and did very well, so, as I pointed out to him, he's proved he can do it so my whip will be cracking.........

[errorofjudgement]

DD starts Y11 tomorrow, she's in the "capable but gets very anxious" camp.
She's talking about trying to drop one of her 11 GCSEs and using the time for homework and revision. TBH I think it's a good idea as its a vocational subject and she already has qualifications at a higher level than the GCSE, but I think the school might be resistant.

Any thoughts or suggestions?

[FlyingFortress]

In too. CAs in English, Drama and Spanish over the next 6 weeks. Mocks in Jan. End of year 10 exams were underwhelming with effort grades to match. Ds is is a late developer both physically and emotionally. He wants to ignore it all and play with lego. We will be looking at 6th forms/colleges as he could probably do with a fresh start assuming he does hit puberty this year.

[dingit]

Joining in too. Waves to some I recognise from year 12 thread

[RaskolnikovsGarret]

Why are so many girls in the capable but anxious camp? I spend my life trying to make DD realise that it doesn't matter if she doesn't get all A stars and 9s.

Although DD2 is far more balanced/lazy, and reassures me that it's not me putting the pressure on DD1. I have told DD1 that our weekends are not going to be taken over by her revising, and that we and she are still going to have a life.

July feels like a long way off.

[bigTillyMint]

Ooh, it's just like old times with the 2nd/3rd/4th timers here!

DS did Core Science and RE GCSES in June, so he has some experience but I think he needs to home his exam technique!

[BertrandRussell]

I wish I could put ds in a blender with a capable but anxious type.

He is capable but horizontal!

[Scrantonicity]

Signing in
This is my first one so it's all new. Dd is doing 11 GCSEs and is predicted good grades but is incredibly disorganised and lazy. I can see I'll be tearing my hair out before long.

[Iamnotminterested]

Can I join in?

Another anxious DD here too, puts an awful lot of pressure on herself and sees anything below an A as failing .

DD also has a mental health issues that worsens considerably when the pressure mounts so a year of hand-holding and tea awaits; luckily she took gcse maths this year and got it and also an A* in early entry R.E.

Here we go...

[pointythings]

Helloooo! DD1 started Yr11 today, she is not exactly anxious but gets herself in a state about things, then buckles down and is fine. It's as if she has to have a panic first and then deal with the problem - she's always been like it.

Not too many more CAs, just History to finish, a couple more Science ones and Geography field work, which she is looking forward to. She didn't do Statistics last year, did something similar but for mathsy people and got an A, so she is happy with that. She's conscientious and very hard working, predicted A/A*/8 and has a good shot at getting it - exams last year very good and she does put the effort in. Now if we can just get the work done without the panic first...

In two years' time I will be in the GCSE/A2 doubles boat, watch me crumble...

[t875]

I'm in! Also joining the capable of doing well but has anxiety issues.
She's already getting ott stressed about going back tomorrow!
I have to try my hardest to not show my worry. She hates change and age has a lot coming with a lot of new teachers!
Trying to stay positive though and trying to stop her from having her fortune telling gloomy specs on!! X

[Laniakea]

me too! DD is back tomorrow.

Another capable but slapdash. She's predicted A*/As & will be incredibly disappointed if she doesn't get them but struggles to see the connection between actually doing work & getting good grades. Ho hum.

DD as usual is cheerful and not worried

[Fleurdelise]

I wish I could swap DS for a "puts a pressure on himself" type child... On a serious note I know that a balance is ideal but currently I'd rather prefer to see some self motivation as opposed to the "whatever" attitude I get...

So are there any rules around it in your house? Phone away at a certain time? Bedtimes imposed? Study and revision time? Is there a plan? I confess there is no plan in this house. He has everything at his discretion as I thought the more stuff he has (phone on him all the time, no imposed bedtime and so on) the more I can take away when needed.

I suspect I'll need a lot of this until July...

[Laniakea]

doh ... missed half of my last sentence

Mocks in December dd is cheerful & not worried !

[Laniakea]

we don't have many rules - while she's actually revising I take possession of her phone. We often chat about homework - she generally brain dumps on me every day after school - but I don't check it & she listens to music or whatever while she's doing it. No bedtime rules beyond I like all the kids to be in their rooms by 10 at the latest & she's usually asleep pretty much straight away. She gets a 7am train to school so has an early start.

She's doing a BTEC in theatre production on top of her GCSEs this year which takes up masses of time - I'm vaguely worried about that.

[Chocolatecoin]

I'm in too. Another with an anxious DD, gosh this really is so hard for them, a lot more pressure than I felt.
Error, although I don't really know your circumstances I would STRONGLY recommend dropping one if you think its the right move. My DD was doing 10 and has dropped one now, which gives her 2.5 hours each week for study and less homework. In my DDs case, that one subject was giving her such difficulties that it was taking all her effort and energy, to the detriment of the others. With it gone she's starting year 11 more confident. For DD, a bit of downtime in the school day, in the quiet of the library, is much appreciated. I'm just concentrating on keeping her happy and healthy this year.

[Fleurdelise]

Well my start of year 11 for DS is not that great, already had a snotty attitude from him tonight which resulted in some cake eating on my side, after a day of being so good. All to do with me daring to say "don't be awake at 12 in the middle of the night as it is school day tomorrow".

DD is year 5 and doing her 11+ Including MAT next September so we are fully stretched to the limit. Tonight a considered actually running for my life, for about 5 min I allowed myself to consider how would it be if I would leave now and return in a year's time.

[AtiaoftheJulii]

No, no rules here. I did a comprehensive cost-benefit analysis and decided the stress didn't result in any improvement!

And I know the "wish mine put pressure on themself" comments are meant lightheartedly, but honestly, it was not at all easy. I'm sure some find a balance, but so far in this house it's been one extreme or the other.

I've had AS and A2 simultaneously, but not A levels and GCSEs yet - that'll be 2019 for me too pointy!

[RalphSteadmansEye]

Signing in with my incredibly able and incredibly stressed and anxious ds (with ASD).

Honestly, if you have a horizontal one, please don't wish to swap them. If they underperform, it's really not the end of the world. If their mental health goes down the pan with the pressure they put themselves under, it's much more serious.

Ds has all his science controlled assessments and history still to do. Pleased he's not taking an MFL; they're a never-ending round of CAs.