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Sons special needs school

(3 Posts)
hippyJules Wed 09-Jan-13 10:49:13

My 12 year son recently was statemented as he has Aspergers/ Autistic spectrum and last year switched from a main stream school where he was struggling to a Small special needs school in our local area. He seems to have settled in well and has made many friends.
My problem is, yesterday he came home and said whilst changing for Pe, his pe teacher noticed he had a bruise on his spine. He then took my son to see the Head teacher to examine him and was questioning him how he did it and taking notes.
I feel this wasn't handled the best it could have been, my son was embarrased, and didnt even realise he had a bruise, let alone know how he did it. Boys will be boys i guess. Surely also, the school should have asked our permission to examine him?? And rung us there and then???
This morning a lady from the school rung and spoke to my husband and asked him if he knew anything about it as it is in a strange place. It feels like they are accusing us of something, even though we are innocent??? I feel guilty of not noticing it, but he's very privacy consious as are most teenagers. My husband said we really have no idea, all we can think is he lifted down his xbox and desk from his bedroom a few days ago, maybe he did it then??
In some ways, i can see their point of view, its their job to care for our children ( I have 15 years experience of working in a childcare setting) and its nice to see they care enough to enquire etc. but i also feel now, i will be paranoid every time he hurts himself or has any little mark on him...
Has this happened to anyone else?? Im so worried at the moment as i have a lot going on with my other children too. Thank you xx

outtolunchagain Wed 09-Jan-13 12:09:35

I wouldn't worry too much , is your son boarding?It sounds like they are just being caring , why are you assuming they are accusing you , it sounds like they are just making sure you were aware .

By the way I also have a teenage son at a SEN school , he boards and I would be fine with this. As you say ds can be very private and I may not be aware if he had injured himself.

outtolunchagain Wed 09-Jan-13 12:14:20

I probably would point out to the school that the note taking was a bit intimidating for your son . To be honest I would just pick up the phone and have a chat with the head And ask him to just clarify what happened and discuss how your ds felt.

My ds often picks up the wrong vibe in these circumstances , for example he may think someone teasing him is cross with him or he may think someone asking friendly questions is angry with him etc

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