Mumsnet Talk

On my last post about a lack of friends, so many of you reached out with your own stories/ support/ advice. Several of you also said it would be great if we had our own thread where we can just meet up and have a chat and be virtual friends.
I apologise about the boring thread name - I couldn't think of anything cleverer! So this is me reaching out... Who wants to join me & be my virtual friend? X

Yep, count me in. Can't stress enough how useful the advice/ concern I have received on this forum has been

Can I please?! It normally take ages for me to get to know people in person - it'll be nice to be part of a group here! Thanks for setting it up and a

Hi there. Lovely to have u both on board! X

Room for another?

I'd love to join too. Live alone and work from home so I always have to make an effort to meet people. & anyone?

Id also like to join.

What a lovely thing to do . May I join too?

The more the merrier! So how r u all today?

Have just put kettle on too. Freezing here have just filled a hot water bottle and trying to keep it tucked in my jumper so a cuppa is welcome.

AgathaF - I heard a little girl called Agatha recently - it's gorgeous!

Hi, what a lovely idea, I'd love to join in.
Having said that I'm off to shower and then out to lunch.
Catch up with you all later

Cavewoman I have the hot water bottle up the jumper too, it is just so cold! I love hot water bottles .

Sunny here. Spring is in the air - can't wait to drag the BBQ out soon

Working at home, now going out because the sun is shining!

May I join as well? Being 'not the right sort of person' to fit in with any groups since I had my kids yonks ago... It seemed to all go downhill when I declared I got my youngest daughter off to sleep on AC/DC not Three Blind Mice... Mind, that was 15 years ago so I ought to stop taking offence now at the way everybody took a step backwards from me in the school yard that day, I don't think showing off my new Guitar and Snake tattoo helped at the time... hello

I am cleaning up debauchery today and eating left over birthday cake from above mentioned daughter's birthday yesterday.

Another hot water bottle fan—mine's on the floor with my feet on it (frozen tootsies emoticon). Cold and wet here.

Can I come in too please?

Ha glad it's not just me with a bottle! At least we're all warm whether it's from the sun or hot water!

Threebats -loving the ACDC idea - may try that with dd hmmmm

Hopping on
Single mum, fairly new partner, open uni student by day.

aaaaand am crap at making new friends in rl!

And love the ac/dc admission...surely that should've made you a kiddy group legend?

Hi, crazy busy working mum of 3 here, I'd love to join and have some virtual friends who wont care if I haven't put make up on

makeup? What is...makeup?

Make up? What's that?

May I join, I think the virtual circle is a good name, can see some good follow on titles.

At home with preschooler and toddler here, are everyone elses at school?

Well, last night I discovered MN. I have found some of the stories on here truly heartbreaking, but also some very inspirational ones too. I sat up into the early hours of the morning and could not stop reading.
Subsequently I forgot to set my alarm, and when I stumbled out of bed at 8am my DS had got himself up, had breakfast and set off for school! (He is nearly 13 but still......) DS2 was sat eating breakfast, so I can confirm that MN has turned me into a slummy mummy overnight. Looking forward to getting to know some of you, letting the washing, ironing pile up and watching the iPad battery die.
(I can't get smilies to work? Anybody else on an iPad? I can see them but can't select them)

Ooh hello! May I join please? I do wearmakeup and i have the heating on to keep the cold from the house. Spring taunted us last week and now naughty winter is back with snow flurries and everything!

AC/DC lullaby sounds great! DS1 used to fall asleep to Ian Dury

Awwwwww really, I'd like to pop in from time to time. I have just been in the phone to my mother this am, I had no one else to ring

I know lots of people in my local area. A smaller group of people I'm friendly with but i don't really have a close group of friends or a best one. I felt quite sorry for myself this am, so lovely to find this thread.

threebats - my dd was born to the tune of 'killing in the name of' by Rage against the machine. That caused a few '?????' at playgroup. I'll join you in the ostracised oddball mother corner. <polishes badge>
<hands another badge to threebats>

Great idea, I would love to join.

Hello all, can I join you too? I lurked on the friendship thread and agree this is a lovely idea for a thread. DD was born during a Barry White song, not intentionally, it was just on the radio in the delivery room :-)
<not as cool as Threebats and Glittery>

Least you guys were organised to have your music sorted! We forgot ours which was our home made wedding background music - cheesy eh!

Well I put my baby girl in stone roses t shirt when she was 3 months, is that oddball enough?!

Love it Feelingood!

Can I also join in ;-)
Was going to just do my daily shread, but got distracted by MN.

Gah, that shred is evil but effective. Apparently. I wouldn't know as my copy is sitting waiting to be used. I must do it. One day...

It's indeed evil, the effective? Still waiting ....

Get it out of the pack and in the machine, I would appreciate someone else suffering too.

Ooh, can I join in too. This sounds like a really good idea.

Chat to loads of people while walking the dog, but find it quite hard getting beyond that to RL friendships.

have been n found original thread yes low self esteem to point of social anxiety i think i worry far too much n wish i hadnt spoke or got involved. thing is im v chatty n outgoing but then i worry...

ive text a couple of people for coffee dates next week.

Love this thread, such a great idea. Dare I ask to join..........

Lovely idea. Is there room for me?

Wow - lots of us out there [waves]

So in proper girly chat style - what are you up to at the weekend? Dh and dc1 will be away leaving me and dc2 to eat bad food and watch trashy telly relax.

Anything more exciting going on?

Hello, I would like to join too, please. I work from home and don't have a huge social circle so welcome any new friends, virtual or otherwise.

Would love to join you. My dd is almost 4 months old and I'm going just slightly stir crazy from lack of adult interaction. Pre mummy days was hardly ever home, so has been quite a big adjustment.
We go to every baby group going locally but only really settled with being frindly with others so far.
Rl interactions are harder these days, sleep deprivation doesn't do me many favours.
Dd tends to doze off to grey's anatomy theme. This weekend dh and I are hoping to take her to the beech or the zoo for the first time.

Can I join too? Since moving to another country I have no friends at all as I don't know the language very well.

Chocolate - I am in the same boat. Are you taking language lessons?

me please! I've never been good at making friends. I don't know why but I'm never sure if people actually like me or are just tolerating me.

How is everyone?

Cavewoman relaxing bad food and trashy telly sound like fun! I'm starting a new business and am running my first Saturday class in the morning. The rest of the weekend I may do what you are doing

Cavewoman That sounds a good weekend! I have my mum coming to visit us as she really misses us, so we will do something touristy and have a roast.

Debs I know that feeling, I think they put up with me as I'm there. For me it's no self esteem that makes me think that.

What's your new business Cavewoman - although understand if you don't want to out yourself .

Those who have moved to another country - that must be tough, especially if you don't speak the language. We love France and have considered moving there, but the language thing does worry me.

Yes it's difficult. People are incredibly friendly where I am and my neighbours invite me in for cups of tea which is brilliant, but they must find me poor company as my witty conversation runs along the same lines as: "Hello! That is good. I like it. Yes please. Good, very good! No I don't like it. Yes X is good country. Please. Thank you. I like!"

Ooh think you meant Debstar! How exciting for you xxdebstarxx - are you nervous for Saturday? Good luck!

AgathaF I had a brilliant 'learn French' CD set by Michel Thomas - it was AMAZING- don't let the language hold you back - France would be wonderful

I can join please?

I meant can I join please? Arg, in my excitement my words came out the wrong way which is pretty typical for me!

Sorry, yes I did mean xxdebstarxx.

We've used the Michel Thomas CDs too - they are really good, and we've done some night school classes too and some other 'learn french' type CDs. We can get by fine socially, but it's the more challenging conversations that make us realise how difficult it is to not be really fluent. We've got a house over there, and its situations like speaking to officials, tax office etc that make me realise how difficult it would be to live there full time. A friend of ours said that you know you are fluent in french when you can argue in the language at the town hall. I think that's a very true sentiment and I would definitely be floored in a town hall arguement .

Anyone else still got any under 5s on here? DS turned 2 in Jan
Take him to a toddler group but i'm only 22 so feel a bit out of place...especially with all the crappy stereotypes of young mums etc!
And I find it hard to talk to people my age who've yet to procreate as I feel like a different race entirely.

Rant over

Thanks for starting this OP, would love to join in

Making kids tea at the mo, sausages & mash, hoping for leftovers....

This weekend I shall begin packing all non essential stuff into boxes as I'm having some work done on the house that will mean lots of dust and mess.

V dull.

Wow, Thought I would check out this thread after getting home from work, and am amazed at how many people have joined the Virtual Circle! That's great - shame we don't all find it this easy in RL! Hello everybody!
Got house to myself this evening so am gonna get some dinner before curling up with a hot water bottle (cold here too!), my two dogs (both very fluffy so also helps keep me warm) and maybe a film!

Sounds like a nice eve
have to do an hour of study once DS is in bed...BUT there's a in it for me if I finish!

Hello I'd like to join too please! I'm just bathing ds2 while ds1 is at footie training. Have had a very busy day at work so looking forward to chilling in front of the tv later and catching up with call the midwife maybe followed by a bit of Dallas!

<waves at Milly...>

Thank you cavewoman I am nervous but excited too.

AgathaF I'm running music and movement classes for preschool children. It's great fun and I enjoyed the training but now it's down to me to promote and run the classes I'm hoping people turn up! People say they will but I'm still crossing my fingers they do.

wewereherefirst it's not the best feeling is it! One day I hope I will feel comfortable with who I am

We are looking forward to the weekend as DH has been away, so will be nice to see him.

My DD's birthday is next week and she will be 7. On Saturday my BIL is taking her out for the day. He is driving over from Brighton to pick her up and then taking the train back to Brighton (he says it feels more like a day out when you go on the train!). She is being taken to the Brighton Eye, for a wee shopping trip, lunch and then is having a manicure. I am quite jealous actually .

So, DH and DS will just have to entertain me!

can I join too? presentations when DD in bed

That sounds like fun xxDebstarxx, and just the sort of thing young children love. Hope it goes really well.

It is great fun AgathaF lots of music, noise and jumping around!

I would love to join! Off to work just now for a 12 hour shift but will have a little peep in later. I lost one of my beloved Labs yesterday and I'm struggling a little today.

Lovely idea Milly, thank you.

So sorry about your dog CominThroughTheWry.

PopeBenedictsP45 - I started language classes but once I passed all the basic classes I stopped going as the travelling time took longer than the time in the class (2 hours). I might do an on-line course instead but I won't get to meet anyone doing that.

Oh that's sad about your Lab CominThroughTheWry

Chocolatemilkshake maybe there will be an online course with a forum so you can skype fellow learners for conversation practice...could be a way to get a learners group going near you?

CominThroughTheWry -sorry to hear about your dog. Dogs are always our closest friends when others seen lacking!
Thanks for all your hellos! I don't know What I did with my time before recently finding MN.
Not sure what I'm doing at the weekend yet - don't have kids so will prob do something nice with DH, and part way through a big declutter so should really get on with that too!
ElectricSoftParade - your daughter's birthday treat sounds heavenly! think I'd be jealous too. Never been to Brighton - going for the first time in a couple of weeks time.
Debstar your business sounds really interesting. Sure u will do great!
Well am off now but will check in tomorrow. Enjoy the rest of your evening everyone!

Hi targaryen24, my dd is almost 4 months and I'm 23. I know what you mean about being a young mum. Sometimes it can feel like I'm a bit in the middle between the very mums and the older mums.
Feel very sorry for many of my rl friends, most of who don't yet have children and only see dd when she is very happy or asleep at the moment so view her as a beautiful little doll.
She's a good baby and pretty easy but until you've changed explosive nappies and been awake ten times longer than you've slept you don't really get it.

hi Targaryen, I also have a 2 year old DS. He's great fun but sure does wear me out! My plan for the weekend is wallpaper stripping - rock and roll eh?

Hello, mind if I join in too? Was going to shyly slink away but threebats AC/DC story/admission convinced me this is the place for me

Quite friendly and outgoing in RL but always found making new friends so so difficult.

<shuts up and just waves to all>

MillyMollyMandy Brighton is great, I'm sure you will have a fab time. I lived in Brighton for about 15 years before moving along the coast a bit but I do love a bit of Brighton time.

ComingThroughTheWry sorry about losing your dog - how sad.

AgathaF yes I can understand what you mean - arguing in a 2nd language would take some doing! Wouldn't that make a brilliant 'advanced' course!! How fantastic to have a house out there though - do you get out often? I'd love one too.

My 3 year old would love your class debstar - sounds lovely.

Hello everybody <waves frantically>

Can I join you? I`m really old, apparently - my DCs are older than some of you

But I do a lot of hands-on care for my 16 month old DGS and know all about nappies, especially as DGS and I spend a ridiculous amount of time poo-gazing

Thank you Milly and cavewoman I hope other people think the same and come along to the classes. I've been promoting them on facebook and twitter and have gone to local toddler groups too and given them a taster of what I do so fingers crossed it all goes well. It's totally out of my comfort zone to go out and push myself to the centre of attention but needs must!

cavewoman it varies from year to year. Some years only once or twice and others we manage quite a few trips. We take our dog though, and he is very old now so I think the journey would be a lot for him to do too often now.

I would like to join please. I have just finished eating which is the first thing I have had since lunch today. Sat here feeling a little lonely. Both DDs are in bed but youngest keeps waking.

My DS was born to whipping piccadilly by Gomez - that caused a few raised eyebrows... <joins threebats and glitteryshit in the naughty corner>

debstar you sound like you're really going for it - good luck!

Weekend looking like a clear out of DS's room, and watching the rugby. Praying for sunshine and warm weather, I want come out from under my layers of sweaters and scarves...

Hello lcdaff

Definitely agree with the thing about friends who've yet to have kids not knowing how hard it is behind closed doors etc. Love him to bits but he's deceivingly good in the day (and public)...especially for a toddler!

Glad I'm not the only mum who's sort of stuck between 'teen' and 'average'. It can feel like a bit of a limbo. I find coming on here helps a lot as no one gives (much) of a toss how old you are etc

And wallpaper striping sounds better than 'super blitz the house for impending grandma visit' Monstermuncher

Everyone's gone to bed!
Pixel I'm old too; no GC yet though.
Night all.

Morning all.

Doris and Pixel - I'm in the old corner too!

Have a great day everyone.

Good morning Virtual Friends... And Happy St David's Day from Wales!!

Acceptance for AC/DC lullaby's is fab. I can happily report that younger daughter has grown up to love rock music although she likes her generation rock more than mine, she is accompanying me to a Meatloaf concert this April - I bagged front row seats - I got 2 tickets and had no friends to come with me as I gave up trying to persuade anybody that he was my husband from a previous life quite some time ago, the non believers! So, she is in!
Listening to the Welsh Male Voice Choir on Radio 2 as I make a pretense of preparing the lunchboxes.... Thank Crunchie its Friday.

threebats we were looking at the Meatloaf tickets, but the weekend they are playing is a bit difficult for us. Where are you going to see them?

Morning VFs

No lunchboxes here this morning, Friday is school dinner day... But I have to get up extra early to get DS up for pre-school activities . Only 4 weeks till Easter, can't wait for school hols again. Half term already seems ages ago.

Taking DS to school soon, need to look out some AC/DC to play in the car!

Anyone else a tad fed up of this crap weather?
Not long now til spring!

Morning everyone!

<waves frantically at AgathaF and DorisPenguin while plastering face with wrinkle cream>

Miserable weather here too, going to cheer myself up by sorting out my kitchen cupboards

I`m having to force myself to get moving today, `cos I went on the scales this morning and it wasn`t good

Bloody weather makes me eat biscuits

I saw myself in the mirror this morning and I looked like a shar-pei in a sporran

agathaF Cardiff. I am going to Cardiff to see him. April 21st. Sunday, 7.30 approx - not that I am at all excited about this but - my train leaves Swansea at 1pm - I want to go to mingle with like minded souls beforehand and generally be one of those people others complain about.... Noisy groupies hanging about the streets of Cardiff drinking... Well, water in my case and not too much of it else I will have to visit the loos and concert loos are the pits of hell - given my bladder is not that of a 20 or even 30 year old anymore, I dare take not than a sip to stave off dehydration if I wish to avoid concert loos!

We just had a parade down our road from the local primary school for St David's Day, dragons and drums and bells and kids and police stopping traffic - It woke my grumpy arsed 21 year old up who scowled at such activity and noise on her one day off... I thought it was lovely
x

Good morning all! <yawns> DS2 was up screaming til 3am so I am shattered, so I had my scowl face on when I did the school run and I wonder why I have no friends IRL

I'm 27 so I'm in the middle-nowhere ground for parents, I had DS1 when I was 20 and was well out of my depth!

It's far too cold today, I'm actually looking forward to taking DS1 to the sauna that is the swimming pool this afternoon. No packed lunches here either, Friday hot dinner day, thankfully.

Mn has been quite a lifesaver for me, so much to see in my virtual world

wewereherefirst - my DS slept like a baby last night (and I mean the real kind, not the figure of speech kind) so we're knackered and scowling too.

I fell pregnant at 19 and am now 22 and though it's like riding a temperamental bike now I was definitely thrown in the deep end!

Have been addicted to MN since I found it a while back

wewereherefirst I had my first when I was 20 - she is now 21. I was out of my depth also but despite my best efforts to feck her up, she's actually a lovely young woman with a ready smile, a huge heart and I would not have had it any other way, looking back.
I wish I was going swimming... I am about to leave house for a walk with a person I have not known long but have decided I have to make the effort to make friends - worrying daftly about 'awkward' conversation moments, stamina if walk is uphill and desperately want it over with so I can be home already....
Forcing myself to socialize... I post this message and close the laptop, going to wait at my front gate in my walking boots.
x

Hello, another joiner here! I am travelling round Europe by boat at the mo, so mainly just have DP & DD (4) for company. I' not actually on the boat at the mo, as we are in Spain for a bit of warmth. Back on the boat in France in about 3 weeks.

Threebats - know what you mean about forcing yourself to socialise. I try & have three "back up" topics of conversation, just in case of an awkward silence. Asking someone about themselves usually works, people will rabbit on for ages about themselves!

Hello can I join. Recently split from my partner of 20 years and suddenly realise how few friends I have as he used to be my best friend. What a nice idea for a thread Milly. I am also in the old corner my eldest is 22 this month. Waves to all.

Hello Orchidlady - of course u r welcome. Sorry to hear about your situation.
Great name - I LOVE orchids!
Hello everyone! Well it's freezing cold here and miserable weather... Need to convince myself to leave the house to walk the dogs & go to work later ... Suddenly housework looks much more appealing...

Morning all. Gorgeous day here in Glasgow. Its about 8 degrees out there which is tropical by Scottish standards!

I love orchids too, I think I need to buy myself a new one this weekend, a bit of retail therapy

Another orchid fan here. I used to live in Singapore and they have an Orchid Garden there, more like a park really. Beautiful, it was. I think William & Kate went there on a visit last year.

I hope you enjoy your walk threebats!

Good morning everyone, thank you for your lovely messages yesterday, they kept me going through my night shift! I did write a very long post last night but my phone ate it for some unknown reason...

Today is a better day. The sun is shining again and WeeLab and I have been for a nice long walk. The crocus bulbs are out, there are little green shoots on the bushes and the daffodils are not far behind. I love this time of year.

I am in the older bracket too, in my forties. No children, it just didn't happen for me. Devoted to my "gels" (said in best Morningside/Miss Jean Brodie accent) instead. Sadly I'm now down to one "gel" now, it's been hard on both of us. I sang Moon River to WeeLab on our way round the (thankfully empty) park, many an afternoon OldGentlelab and I would watch Breakfast At Tiffany's, she would let me hug her when I cried at the end. WeeLab and I are now the two drifters off to see the world. [feeling sad and sentimental emoticon].

I am also an auntie, to two fabulous under fives, and they run me ragged!

Another orchid lover here. Seabright I am a little bit jealous of your lovely travels!

Off to bed now, working again tonight, so night night all! Looking forward to a good catch up over the weekend. I'm going out for lunch on Saturday but I shall be peeping in tonight to keep up with you all. Whether or not my ruddy phone lets me join in is another story!

Have a lovely day everyone!

Hi ladies, can I join?
We relocated last year and I left lots of amazing friends and a life that I loved. I am in the old corner too, my eldest is 18 on Monday and my youngest is 23 mths today. There are 4 more inbetween

Hi lia,

It's horrible when you have to leave a life behind, isn't it? You sound like you have a lovely houseful though!

I only got up to get a hot water bottle...really must go back to bed, even though I'd much rather be loitering on here!

Comin - Moon River in Breakfast at Tiffany's makes me cry too! I wish I had a dog to soak up the tears.

Hi everyone, hope you're all doing ok today. I'm working from home in my pyjamas, as per. No wonder I never get anything done!

seabright Am utterly jealous... You mean to tell me you have seen the sun? The round, yellow thing that resides somewhere up in the sky and radiates warmth to those below? I thought that was only a myth....

Walk went well, I think anyhow. No strained conversation, had a coffee. To be honest, felt a bit odd as I am used to walking on my own and getting coffee on my own. But odd as opposed to weird which is good. Am happy to be back home again now though, its not very easy in your 40's to just be able to join in and make friends. Found it far easier when I was younger. But, we have said to do it again next Friday, weather permitting so it can not have gone badly.

comingthroughthewry so sorry to hear about Oldgentlelab....

Plans for rest of my day are thus: Ignore all cleaning up that needs doing, pretend I have no work to be getting on with and my inbox is clear, fill up hot water bottle, go sit on couch under a blanket and finish reading my book. I have some Drumstick Lollies and I am not afraid to eat them!
x

Afternoon people or VF's now that I've joined the group I'm a tad lost for words

I do spot a Game of Thrones fan, or at least I hope I spot one! Is anyone else excited about the prospect of the new season?

neri which season are you talking? I am far behind with the TV series (have seen two). I have read six books (I think?) but am going to stop now, they just lost their power after the first three. Is it worth persevering with the TV version?

PopeBenedictsP45 the 3rd season is due to be aired in the UK on April 1st, I am really excited, I've read all of the books right up to A DANCE WITH DRAGONS: AFTER THE FEAST and are waiting for the last 2 books to be written and released. You need to persevere with the books, they drop off a bit as he fills in a few back stories then they pick up again and there a few surprises as well

Aha, I'm not so behind after all!

I'm reading Dance With Dragons and am finding it's really dragging and I have just about lost interest - which means I'm not keeping up with the characters. And there's not enough Arya in there!

apparently he took a few of the chapters about the main characters out of the last couple of books and stuck them in the Winds of Winter instead (I'm showing my inner geek here ) if you have a hunt about on some of the forums and check out George RR Martins website you will find exerts from the moved chapters, Theon Greyjoy was one of the characters to have chapters about him moved...

OK, I will get my geek on and have a look around. Thanks!

Hello neriberi
Very big fan of GOT (both books & series)...so am obviously very glad it's March

I'm looking forward to John Snow running around at the wall! I'm off home so have a good weekend all!

Likewise
Have a goodun!

Just seen this thread, And I wanted to say that the title of 'virtual circle of friends', says it all. I do not often post, but, as has said by others, in RL, not having many friends, coming on here and being part of this community, means a lot. Thank you, everyone.

Please may I join too?

Welcome, Shadowland & CremeEggThief, and anyone else that sneaked on here while i was at work! Hope everyone has a lovely weekend, and maybe I'll see some of u on here too!

Hello everyone. Bad day today felt so lonely and down but tomorrow is another day and hopefully a good one

Hi, I met a mner today in rl, can't actually remember her mn name but she's lovely and were meeting again next week.

Just laying with dd23 mths then me and dh going out for dinner, we're lucky to have a great restaurant literally 5 mins away that so fab food. Can't wait I'm starving. I made a chocolate and banana cake this afternoon, cut into it and it's not cooked in the middle < sobs>

Can anyOne recommend a good box set for me and ds (15) to watch. We've just finished the Mentalist so something like that, crime. Not CEO though.

What's everyone's plans for the weekend then?

Csi even

lia66 how about Bones, Criminal Minds, Person of Interest, The Closer, Murdoch Mysteries? I enjoy The Mentalist and love these too!

I'd second the suggestion of bones

And hope you have a better day tomorrow debstar , may it just be a fluke bad day!

My DS has been sleeping really badly so I've been felt a little confused all day!
Love him to bits but am very glad it's the evening

Ooh this thread is what I need. Struggling a bit with RL (nothing serious, am just wrung out from demands of toddler + newborn) and feel lonely <violins>.

Pull a chair up issima and have a with us

Thank you targaryen24 hopefully tomorrow will be a good day. First saturday class for my business...fingers crossed people come!

it's fair enough issimma
The odd day does go by when I don't speak to an adult (other than till workers, leccy company etc)! Nice to talk a little on here when I'm having one of those days

And good luck in that case deb!

Evening all.
I seem to be the only 'owl' here!
CominThroughTheWry, hope you have more luck posting on your night tonight. I also work nights, but did a 12hr day shift today. Interviewing in the morning and saw some lovely candidates; hopefully they want to work with us!
Welcome to the old corner lia <waves>

Can I join please? Just spent another evening hitting 'refresh' on Facebook, to see what people who have a life are getting up to.
xxDebstarxx Myself & my 2 year old would love to come to your class, I am desperately trying to think of something to do this weekend with her.

Good morning VCF's! Up early to take younger daughter off to march in a Cadet parade - dropping her off then home to clean, yuk.

xxdebstarxx hope today is a better day for you. Had a terrible three weeks here personally, which I am now putting to bed and moving forward, so I wish you a better Saturday than you had a Friday.

How about True Blood? The Walking Dead? Jericho was good, unbelievable that it got canned. Sons of Anarchy is jaw dropping. I love Spielberg's Taken as well. Watch it once every year without fail.

I also like to make the mountain from Close Encounters out of the froth in any cup of Latte I have when I am out, especially if the froth is super thick - I have taken pictures of the really good ones... Now that signals I go for coffee on my own and need a VCF more than anything else I have written here

Another oldie here...so morning everyone.

To everyone at work l am a confident fun person but inside l am still a shy teenager who dissects every conversation to see if l could have offended someone. I am really quite shy and terrified of social gatherings where l have to make small talk. Apart from the weather l am stumped.
Up early again this morning with my dog who never came with an alarm reset button. He thinks everyday is a working day so long lies are a thing of the past.
Looks as if it will be another bright day up here in Scotland so will take my boy a run to the beach an.d knacker him for tonight.

Oooo please can I join in?! I'm 24 with a 2.9dd, hi everyone

Hello
So much seems to change between 2 & 3...
My DS just grew between 1 & 2 but has now suddenly decided to bother talking as well as running up the walls!

And doha , I often feel the same. Try to live by the 'fake it til you make it' mantra when it comes to confidence but haven't made it yet

I think there should be a rl gathering purely for shy mumsnetters!

Yup

Morning all,
Sun - yes, at the moment I see it most days! Even sat out and ate my lunch yesterday. Before you get too cross & ban me though, it gets cold in the evening and there's no fire or central heating, just a fan heater. However, the blanket I'm crocheting keeps me warm as I crochet, which is great!

What's everyone up to today? No plans yet gere, other than a trip to the supermarket & maybe a beach walk, if I can persuade DD (she's afraid of waves).

Box sets - I am re-watching (again!) The West Wing and recently finished The Sopranos. Recommend both.

Hello seabright
Have a (very rare) night off tonight so am going to the cinema with a fellow mum who'll also be off duty. Need it with this horrid weather & DS not sleeping lately.

Would love to be able to do a beach walk! Bit far away from the sea atm

Well so much fro bright ideas--still sat here..sun has disappeared, the thought of getting off this seat and getting ready is filling me with dread. Perhaps a virtual walk on a sunny beach with dog will have to do...

need to get motivated

Please someone make me move

threebats if you are in the Carmarthenshire area of South West Wales you would be welcome to join in the fun at the class. Just getting ready to go now. Very nervous and hope the people who said they are coming do come!

Sorry I meant Galaxy Addict see how nervous I am!

Hello everyone can I join? Haven't been on Mn for long but would love to join you <waves at everyone>.

I'm in the older bracket but have always found it hard to make rl friends.

GalaxyAddict I'm firmly of the opinion that the people who are constantly updating about their busy life on FB are not actually that busy at all [ grin], but that might just be me being a grumpy old woman!

Another oldie here. I have a Ds of 10 and have spent many years moving around. I struggle with making RL friends. So this forum is a life line.
I have a day of soccer at 1:30 and then a Gaa match at 4:30. Where I have to make small talk with strangers arghh!

xxdebstarxx That is kind of you but if I turned up to a class for pre-schoolers with my 21 year old pregnant daughter (yeah, yikes!!) My 19 year old son, who, is autistic so would spend the whole time ignoring everybody and my 16 year old daughter who is actually in your neck of the woods today banging her cadet drum - not sure I would kind of fit in! Mind, if you need a hand with anything or want to meet up and sit in awkward silence with me as we both suck at making new friends outside of our VCF then you are more than welcome - I am in Swansea.
I am hiding this afternoon from said 21 year old and her partner and son - in my room trying to get some work done while they all watch some rubbish on telly downstairs... I miss the rugby and I wish it was not a weekend off...
x

Fabulous threebats we shall have to meet up for a coffee and hide behind the coffee cups

We will be watching Ospreys v Munster on S4C later this evening. No escape from rugby here!

I have an exciting afternoon of shopping and clothes washing to do now wonder why I'm on mumsnet instead

Hi everybody <<waves>>

xxDebstarxx - hope your class went well. Shame I`m not in your area, I`d love to take DGS to something like that, especially as you sound nice - not one of those bossy types who make me want to run away!

Spent the morning shopping and then defrosting the freezer, am now having a coffee before getting on with a blanket I`m crocheting for a friend`s baby. <<waves crochet hook at Seabright>>. Not an exciting weekend, but cosy!

Hello <waves>

Help, I want to ask here as you seem like a lovely bunch and sentiment behind thread is, well, nice

I text someone a couple of days ago just' hi how you must catch up' type of text and I havnt heard back. I'm just upset and paranoid as I think she has stopped speaking to me because of some group politics - I have stopped being part of clique and no longer speak to the queen bee (my own choice)

I wish this didn't bother me but it does, you wouldn't want to be friends with people like that anyway would you? It makes me want to stay in and not bother.

Im naturally outgoing and chatty, but can't seem to be able to keep friends certainly not make close ones.

Feelinggood I agree you don't want to be friends with people like that. If she hasn't text you back then she isn't worthy of your friendship.

It is hard and I get why it bothers you because it hurts. I've been there and although it may not get easier as such somehow it doesn't bother me as much nowadays.

Hi Pixel I'm not bossy at all far from it...I wish I could be sometimes but can't quite get there!

You'd all be welcome at my classes

Good evening all...

Can I join in the fun? I have been here a while and used to post a fair bit (utter drivel admittedly), but of late, I just lurk. Saw this thread while lurking and can identify with lots of you (especially doha) "to everyone at work I'm a fun confident person"...I'm an oldie too..51<whispering emoticon> ..pleased to meet you all

willieverbeasizeten I won't ever be a size 10 either! Welcome to the VCF... Although, it is MissMollyMandy78's brilliant idea so hats off to her.

I have just finished cleaning my kitchen - about to go glare at the huge pile of ironing... So a fast good morning to all and I will see you on the other side of Mount School/College Uniform...

Hi count me in i am new to this but so far have really enjoyed chating on here. As you get older its hard to make friends and with two kids one of which has ASD its hard to get out and meet people so virtual friends hello.

Make up i put it on for the first time in about 6 months thinking i looked ok for an over worked mum with 2 kids and 2 jobs. Only to have my son who does have ASD ask me what was wrong with me you look abit weird quote unquote . thanks for that ds think i will leave well enough alone lol

debstar thanks. I was being paranoid, she txt and I saw her today. She was fine. It is awkward ex-clique politics - well for me.

pinkpaws I made a real effort to look good as Ive been trudging around at less than my best and I felt so much better. so good for you!

welcome to williever

Morning all, hope everyone had a good weekend.
After a weekend spent DIYing my house is a complete tip so today will be mostly cleaning and laundry, boring but necessary.

Glad your friend texted back Feelingood.

Pinkpaws, I can't do without a bit of makeup, even if its just some mascara. Some of the mums on the school run are very glossy, I don't know how they manage at that time in the morning, I'm usually putting my face on in the toilets at work..

Anyone doing anything exciting today?

feelingood Glad to know your friend text back
pinkpaws I am the scruffiest person on the block! This winter I have survived in a hat, just a hat, well, not just a hat, I wore clothes! But as far as doing hair was concerned? For what? I leave my house mainly to food shop and go on walks. Occasionally to go pick up some work. What is the point in Pantene glossy locks? Under a hat, nobody sees what birds nest you are sporting... Makeup has been the bare minimum so that when I did go out, I did not frighten small children and the elderly.
However, I have begun to get it together of a morning this last week - its going to be warm soon so the hat has to go back into the winter box... It actually does make you feel better to dry your hair properly and put a proper face of makeup on...
The problem with winter is, apart from the cold, its so dark so early and so much time is spent alone indoors that you forget how to behave in a reasonable society and begin to get all cave woman-ish... Slopping about in jeans, hair a tangled mess of matted nastiness, debauchery running rife throughout your entire personal presentation as you understand - the couch, a blanket and a hot water bottle is far, far more preferable to going off upstairs to swish your hair into loveliness - who the hell is going to see it anyhow? Saved a darn fortune in hairspray this winter...
monstermuncher I have just scrubbed a particularly disgusting bathroom after three children romped through it before school/college this morning... Absolute carnage, I do not know how they do it. Now I have showered, thankfully, in a clean shower - I am off to get dressed, off to pick up a bit of work I have to do then coming home to do said work - typically boring Monday here...

thanks monster and three bats

I lived under my hood last week, I wasn't well and my hair was so badly in need of colouring. I did it myself and gave it MN haircut to trim it

I put all my face on, on Friday and did feel so much better, but is the last thing I feel like doing if I'm tired, hungover or staying in. But I'm am making. Ore of an effort, I've joined a thread in s. and B.

My 1yr DD just woke up so. I'm gonna feed her a snack and crack on with some housework, she 'helps' with a t towel and finds the Hoover amusing we play chasey. Then I've got cooking to do, a little shop, ds school pick up, home work,

What happened to the VCF's - Oh God, its my fault, isn't it? I told you all I could not make friends, I told you... ;)

Hi all. Well today I became the mother of an adult. Eek. I can still remember the day I went into labour as clear as day. Only got 5 more to go

Nothing exciting here at the weekends, I have a yr one child so weekends are taken up with organising presents for all the parties she goes to.
I'm on phone so can't see far enough up the thread to name heck but I'm glad it turned out to be a misunderstanding with your friend.

Just laying putting dd to bed then off to watch Sundays call the midwife < rock n roll >>

Congratulations lia66 hope you all had a fab day

threebats I'm here! Just don't always know what to say so stay quiet and lurk about

Had a fun day...was my turn to clean the toilets. My boyfriend and I take turns each week cleaning the kitchen or the toilets. I bet you're all jealous of the fun I had

Cleaning the toilet! Now that's unfair, how dare you have so much fun on a Monday... Where is my bleach? I am going to do mine today!

I hit a pot hole yesterday doing the college run home. My front passenger tyre is about as flat as a pancake - was furious, you can not underestimate the language used. This is my second in as many months. The road is a main road and its littered with the things, there is no avoiding them, especially when they suddenly get worse overnight and you do not know... Sigh...

As luck would have it, a council worker deemed to knock my front door not long after I got home, flashing his pin on badge and sickly smile and searching for 'proof' my 21 year old was in full time education and not working therefore eligible for council tax - An opportunity to get arsey with a council worker? Too huge to ignore...
...That's the result of picking her up from college today - the place you are not entirely sure she is at... (Point at rapidly deflating tyre on car) Perhaps instead of paying you for working unsociable hours, calling on people at evening dinner time, the money could go on, oh, lets say, road maintenance? If you lot can not work out from the paperwork already sent in from the college that she is indeed attending a full time course for the next year then heck if I can help you out. You do have the paperwork at your office, go back and check it. What more can we do? Unless you wants to come back at 7.40 tomorrow (today) and go on in with her?
Tossers. They have asked us a total of 7 times since last September to 'prove' she is not working and is in college - they have the enrollment forms she and the college signed ffs! Makes me boil over... You would swear we are running an international fraud syndicate here not trying to educate a young adult.

Hello everyone. It's foggy here this morning and cold too, but hoping for some sun later on.

threebats I think you can claim back cost of repairs from the council if a pothole damages your car/tyre. Here

AgathaF We must have found that pothole site together! I found it after my rant here... Problem is, the road is so busy, I can't realistically get a photo of it and measure it... Not entirely sure which one I hit either, I can take my pick, there are lots of them. I am going to ring the highways this morning and tell them about it, ask for the trye costs back and tell them, surely they have to have realised by now, the entire road is caving in? Its right by a primary school so avoiding the darn holes in road is impossible as there are cars parked up all over the place at home time. Unless you stop driving altogether or mount a pavement, there is no avoiding this mess of a road. Its as if the entire thing is caving in on itself... Muppets. I don't hold out much hope of getting them to pay for the tyre - this is Swansea Council and Highways and they are so bad at everything they, well, do not do... I am continually surprised Swansea remains up and running given how terrible the council here actually is...
xxdebstarxx The amount of times I have thought of moving to your area simply for the council being a million times better than the one here you can't believe...
Off to shower now all kids have left for the day then onto phone then off to tyre garage... Yawn...
Thanks Agatha for taking the time to post up that site for me.

[Waves] is there room for another one?

I hope you get somewhere with your council.

Morning all
Spring has sprung here today, its a lovely morning and the school run was a pleasure. Bad day yesterday, my lovely 2 year old was a screaming devil child all day but I am pleased to report he is back to being lovely today. So far anyway.
Hi Lia66 - that must be a strange feeling when your babies are officially an adult. Cant say I'm looking forward to mine growing up. (are teenagers easier than toddlers?)
Sorry about your car threebats - give em hell.
Hello Tithead <waves back>

Morning all, hope you had a good weekend! I've not been on here for the last 3 days cos I've been feeling down, but I will make more of an effort from now on. Today - work, then housework

Hello everyone!

monstermuncher are teenagers easier than toddlers? I'd say the terrible two's are an indication of what teenagers are like!!!! Saying that, my boys aren't that bad...they spend a lot of time in their rooms and come down for food occasionally! Apparently I'm embarrassing

threebats you'd be welcome in Carmarthenshire anytime! If you have no joy with the council shame them in the local press. Practice your sad face and pose pointing at the offending pot holes or holding up the bill from the new tyre.

I hope you are feeling better today Milly if you need to talk then please do. We might be able to cheer you up even if only slightly

xxdebstarxx I could never go in the local paper - all that attention would crucify me! I like to stay as under the radar as possible, I am always the one dressed in black, up the back of the room, head down, glasses on and pretending I am not there... Lovely...
I got a big sigh from the chap in Highways once I told him where the pothole was. 'Oh, that road... Its down for a resurface' - bloody resurface? Try excavating the site, possibly find King Edwards little brother down there somewhere... I have gone back, managed to take a picture and I have to send that along with my strongly worded letter to the Insurance Dept within the County, that'll be an hour I never get back, never mind the cash for my tyre

monstermuncher My lot are 21, 19 and 16 - are they easier? Well, yes. They never wake up before lunchtime on weekends. On weekdays, you can tell them to set their own alarms or be late, and you feel no guilt about it! They can get their own food if they are hungry. They can be yelled at to wash up without it seeming as if you are using your child as slave labour. But - they do want to use your car, they do like to call you old and mine continually bang on at me about life as if I am a pensioner with no idea at all how anything in the world works - I go selectively deaf when this occurs.

Molly I second Debstar, we may be able to cheer you up, you never know

I am about to go take a neighbour up the hospital for an appointment - not as selfless an act as it appears as I want to nick her gardener as he is cheap and use him myself! I also just let out my cat who threw up on the smoke alarm, setting it off, it sits on the stairs rather than hangs on a ceiling - I have to purchase a stepladder. The cat got chased right back down our garden path by a chicken from next door - no time to think why the chicken is loose, have to go pick up other neighbour... But cat is back indoors and God help her if there is more vomit waiting for me upon my return.

Thanks for your concern, Debstar & Threebats -hope you have recovered from your adventure, Threebats!
Will keep my moans as brief as possible, as I have already posted on the mental health board. Basically My mum had serious mental health problems and i had a pretty abusive childhood. My grandma also had severe depression so it runs in the family. I have had several depressive episodes in the past and despite my life being wonderful, I've started feeling depressed again. Guess i was sticking my head in the sand before, because I have blamed it on other stuff going on eg work stress, bereavements. But I have no stress, no excuse to cling to this time, so I have to face the fact that i will probably get these relapses for the rest of my life. I know many other people do, but I've always feared 'turning into my mum' after seeing her deteriorate and destroy the people around her. I'm just getting my head around it all, but I'll be ok - thanks again for your concern!

Hi Milly Have you tried counselling or CBT to help you when you get these relapses? I've done both and they helped me. Just a way to retrain your way of thinking and not beat yourself up about things. Either that or ADs? It is difficult but I've been there several times too and always wonder why when my life appears to be going well. Guess it's just the way I'm made

Oh threebats what an eventful day you are having. I hope you have a quiet evening ahead!

Debstar - I have tried counselling before but has only really looked at why i might feel that way, but now doing a cbt course which is more helpful for me. As I said, I have no reason to feel low, so pointless trying to dig up a reason with a counsellor, but cbt is giving me some tools to change my feelings and challenge that negative voice inside my head, that likes to make me feel worthless. Am trying to apply what i learn in cbt to real life, and am considering meds if this is not enough.

It's so hard sometimes isn't it! CBT is good but don't beat yourself up if you have a relapse. Life gets in the way sometimes and stops us achieving when we think we should have. Baby steps are best when I'm feeling low.

molly I am sorry to hear about how you are feeling, you also debstar .
Life likes to throw us curve balls in whatever form they take, an actual calamity that you can see, touch, taste and say, 'that's it, that's what's the matter...' Or, as if actual calamities are not enough, it then throws us the curve ball of depression which we can not fathom, how, why, what or when...

I can't assume to know what cbt is, I have no idea. Afraid I am the sort of person who hits the brick wall of depression and retreats into the house to fight through it on my own. Possibly why I have no friends about me? Its hard to be friends with a person who retreats into themselves a lot.
I find music makes all the difference to me - This sounds corny I know but, honestly, I retreat into Meatloaf... So many times I have disappeared into a Meatloaf album. It started when I was young and I possibly owe the man a great deal for the fact he keeps on releasing new material as otherwise, I would be in silence. Gosh, written down that makes me seem off my nut!

I like strong words, his songs have stories to them. I retreat into words and music. My children are kind of used to me reading, listening to Meat, writing myself - its a very solitary existence. I also love films, anything at all with a strong story to them really. Its escapism? When I pop my clogs, my headstone will read, 'thee who liked to live life vicariously through other people's stories...'
I am incredibly intrigued by a person who has written something that just explodes, be it a song, a book, a film... I think a lot about how their minds work - for example, to come up with Objects in the Rear View Mirror, which is a Meat song - just how in the heck does that mind work? That is outstanding story telling and was it an actual experience?
I am very strange as a person which is why I remain alone all the time. It breeds depression which is a struggle to fight through. But I escape via stories.
Possibly of no use to you both at all, but, you are not alone in the feeling of well, desolation that washes over a person in waves for no apparent reason. Keep onto the hope that a better day is coming.
Sorry - long post - I type super fast and think even faster than I type! A side effect of writing as a hobby.

Threebats - thanks for your reply. I'm exactly the same when it comes to retreating. Doesn't really help my lack of friends either - it is such hard work to chat on the phone to my few friends when i am low, and actually meeting is impossible.
I used to write all the time years ago and was thinking recently that it is something that i would like to get back into, but i can't be bothered! Took all my energy to get out of bed today... Vicious circle really!

I have phone phobia Molly - hate the phone, go to any lengths not to talk on the phone. That does not help with the friends issue. My house phone has been pulled out of the back of the phone for the last 3 weeks actually - longest time in a long time. My mobile is on and I do text and reply to text I get.
Mainly, its the kids wanting lifts!
I have gone to see a friend and driven right past the house and come home again - sometimes the energy it takes is too much.

If you used to like to write, why don't you write a journal type thing, for example, a few lines an evening before you go to sleep. Even if its full of, I feel shite today and other such negative expressions then try to write one nice thing at the end. Like, I heard a song on the radio I had not heard for years, I like that song... It sounds rubbish but its a good thing to do actually if you used to write and don't anymore. It can get you back into the love of writing which is very therapeutic. If your life sucks at the moment, if you make up a life on paper/Pc about people that do not actually exist and places that are not real and things happening that are not happening, fiction, honestly, I have had the toughest times before and that has produced, I think, some of my best writing and I steer clear of writing about what's going on in my life - it takes you out of yourself and your life.
Tough to do when your children are little but well worthwhile trying
x

Threebats - your phone phobia sounds really tough and definately makes it more of a challenge making friends
You have convinced me that I should start writing again, even if its just a few lines. I did actually buy a journal a few weeks ago but it's still empty! Think part of my problem is I used to be a good writer in my teens but when i have tried in recent years, it sounds really lame and like some lame teen novel. I have a bit of a thing about perfectionism and can be very critical of myself but I should write from the perspective of it being fun/ therapeutic, rather than focusing on the end result.

I think the word Journal is daunting - you almost expect to have to fill it with wondrous musings that are full of wit, charm and also, deep thinking, ponderous observations of life.... I kept one in an attempt to get back into my writing - honest to God, its full of shit
But what it did do was make me write again. It started off as a journal, a notebook, by hand, in pen. Then I remembered why we all type in the first place - achy writing hand syndrome! Swapped swiftly over to laptop and pretty soon I was writing properly again and that was, as the journal was.., pretty suspect writing. Terrible grammar, pathetic word use, However - writing is an exercise I think, if you do not do it, you loose the technique and when you start again, you go back to basics and train hard? I wrote utter bollocks for ages before I formulated a story and it grew and grew.
I do it for pleasure, I have 4 finished novels here. I can't stop when I start, I become obsessed and write and write all the time. I wake up at night and have to write down what woke me in the first place - an idea! I have a box full of ideas written on scrap paper that I can pull out like from a tombola and go with it.
As you have written in the past, you will know that anything you do in a first draft will need re-doing. Don't focus on the end result focus on the first chapter/story. Then put it aside for a week. Then go back and read then re-write and do it again if you feel you have to. Grammar and so on can be proof read by a friend? I will proof read for you if you get to the end of a story...

Hi threebats and Milly I hope you are both feeling ok today.

One of the things I've found that helps make me feel better rather than continue on the downward spiral of depression is to write down or think of three things that have been good each day. It makes you focus on the positive rather than the negative. It was the hardest thing to do when I started but it does get easier. I began by thinking of stupid things just to think of something but it soon does make you realise that something good is happening in your life however bad you are feeling.

The writing things sounds like a good idea. I hope you don't mind if I start using it too

Hi Debstar, hope you had a good day today! Mine wasn't verey great really (already put long post on Mental Health section, & don't want to repeat myself too much). Just feel like such a failure. Had planned on writing 3 good things each day, as read somewhere else sbout this and thought it sounded a good idea. Also bought a big notepad today to start filling with all my ramblings!

Sorry to hear you had a rubbish day hope your feelin better. We're out all day today taking DS to visit DP's parents this morning and then to his brothers this afternoon. I'm feeling rather rubbish and would much rather go back to bed.

Good morning. I hope you feel better as the day goes on Tithead

Milly you've made a good start buying the notebook for your ramblings, now you just have to make a start on rambling. If three good things seems like too much for now how about trying one good thing. Buying the notebook could be that one thing.

I hope everyone has a good day. I'm off to run my preschool class this morning and then going to mums house to wash some clothes grrrr at my broken washing machine!!!

Thanks Deb it's been a long day. I will be taking some pain killers and a cup of tea to bed very soon and curing up with a book, I will more than likely read two pages and fall asleep with it in my hands. Grr to the broken washing machine, how very annoying.

Morning all,
I have been unwell, migraine, any light hurt, a crack of it coming through the blinds never mind a laptop screen!
Slight headache today which is a huge improvement so... Yeah! I can start to clean up a house which, left for three days without the Hitler of Cleaning shouting,'pick up your shoes! Put your dishes in the sink! What the hell is this on the floor? Anybody even know..? Whatever it is, its morphed into a map of South America... Can somebody clean it up?' It was cat sick - again... I have a kindly neighbour who feeds my cats leftover food on a plate by her back door... They eat it all gleefully then come home and vomit it back up.
I have mentioned this to her but alas...
Not much to report aside from vomit-gate.

molly I have popped onto your other thread, out of interest, where abouts are you living? I think that it is quite possible for anybody to arrive at a point where they feel useless and have no direction or possible use to anybody. Contrary to what some have said about pulling yourself together as if its as easy as pulling a pair of curtains together - its not quite so easy once you have become rooted into a thought system of having no consequence to anybody/thing. You have to take small baby steps back into society almost and that is why I ask where you are living, so we can pop onto google and find you something, a point at where you can at least start?
Nothing is impossible

Lastly - I hate mothers day. I could not find a card yesterday for my mother than was not full of sentiment... Considered sending my mother a sympathy card instead, 'My deepest sympathies on having such a shite daughter, but chin up old girl, you have your sons!'
Did not purchase one in the end - I couldn't stomach the hypocrisy...

Phone phobia !! I so get that. I find myself having to rehearse what l am going to say i l have to phone someone and if it rings in the house and l dont recognise the number l dont answer it.
DH and l going on holiday on Wednesday. I often envy couples who can go abroad meet other couples and spend time together in the evenings while there. I wouldn't know where to start, so it will be just us 2 for a week. DH is brilliant company tho
Chin up all you lovely ladies...let's have a group hug for mothers day

Hi everyone! Hope you feel better Threebats, i egt migraines myself so know how horrid they can make u feel. I live in Essex - don't want to out myself by saying exactly whereabouts, as i fear I have already put too much specific, detailed info already on my other posts. I know it's not as easy as pulling myself together, and at moment am planning on taking baby steps first eg dog walking and a bit of housework every day, before i move onto bigger things. funnily enough i find this easier than doing something fun - part of my cbt homework was to do a simple planned fun activity each day and i couldn't manage one thing! I am luckier than many in that i do not have kids to look after so i have more free time, but i just couldnt rustle up the energy to do something nice! It seemed such a chore - i actually did housework instead on a few occasions! Just weird lol!

molly Oh, now, I challenge your 'luckier than most as I do not have children' - If my three left home I would be alone. Well, I would have the vomiting cats but really, some days, they leave for college/school and I just hang about waiting for them to come back.... I think you almost apologise for feeling bad because you have no children to run about after, given this is MN and all - don't do that. Don't apologise because you feel bad I am lucky because I have the kids to run about after, it means there are three people I can talk with or laugh with or just miss when they are not here. It must be tough for you because you do not have the distraction of three bodies laying about the place whom you can kick for fun as you go past (only done it three times today - once each because they threw chocolate wrappers at me which one of the cats decided to chase therefore jumped on my chest as I was trying to drink coffee - absolute carnage - jumper in washing machine as I type).
Essex is enough info - now then, what do you like to do? I like swimming, for example and go if I can each day a week. I am up to 90 lengths, that is 25m pool NOT full olympic size pool because if it were full olympic size pool I would not been typing this on account of the fact - I drowned.
Is there an exercise that you enjoy? Or one you have always wanted to give a go? Let's start there. If there is, where would you like to go do it in your area?
Doha Phone phobia - yeap... Its a joy. I have to brace myself before I make a call. Make coffee, sit down, breath deeply and think hard about what to say. I have, today, plugged phone back in - it won't last - it will ring, I will wait till it stops, 1471 it then call back if I know the person or not bother if I do not then pull out of wall again and live my life vicariously via the radio dj's and songs!

Hi everyone!

Sometimes the thought of doing stuff is harder than actually doing it. I used to talk myself out of doing things all the time. Baby steps is a good approach. I used to make sure I had to go to the shops each day so I would time it so I ran out of bread on a different day to running out of milk if that makes sense.

Also, I think having children makes things easier because you have to get up and go out for them so it means you can't hide away.

Do you like reading? Is there a local library you could go to?

Oh, Debstar - good idea... Molly, you like to write? How about looking up your local library and seeing if they have a writers club? I know, 'club' strikes fear of God into us people that can't make friends but... But... Writers tend to be tame folk, don't they? Secluded souls who spend all their time alone writing? You do not have to contribute to the writing, you can say you want to sit in a few times to get your writing muse back? Not an uncommon thing for those in a writing group to hear I would have thought?

I would be interested in a writer's club, but do feel it would be nice to actually start writing first. I love to read, but have almost stopped completely cos my concentration is not always great, but I have had a look at a couple of online reading groups and decided to join one cos it might give an added incentive to start reading again. I am not sporty but i do enjoy aqua classes so have googled times of local classes - there's one i could do on friday mornings before work. As for other stuff, not really sure what I like as i tend to make excuses when i feel uncomfortable with an idea! That needs to stop!
Thanks for your continued support, Threebats & Debstar - it does help! I hope u had a good day with ur family today! I take your points about it not necessarily being easier cos i don't have kids - tbh i did put it tha way cos i know how hard some people have to work and almost expected a flurry of people coming on here saying how can u be tired/ depressed/ not make time for yourself?... I have 17 kids and I manage! Etc etc... Lol
And Threebats, i know what u mean about my mothers day... I hate it too ... I trawl the shops for a card that just says the minumum (not the best mum in the world, my best friend, blah blah blah) x

Molly depression and anxiety have been part of my life for a very long time. I suppose they have become my friends I know what works for me and if passing that on to someone else can help them then I will be extremely happy. Please start small with doing things like clubs and stuff. Start with one and be happy with going to that. Otherwise you may stop doing all of them if you try too much too soon.

Mother's Day didn't happen here...I didn't remind my teenagers or give them money to get me something so didn't expect a thing. I'm the same with cards for my mum. I didn't bother this year. I know that sounds terrible to other people but I really couldn't be arsed.

Hi everyone sorry to hear you have all been going through such a rough time. I have been feeling quite low recently. Have been on long term sick since November with severe stomach pains and it's really starting to take its toll. It feels like it magnifies all the minor niggles into bigger issues than they are.

Good morning all!
You guys are all English right? Aside from deb anyhow, that I know of - I feel I have to give you fair warning - Wales need 8 points to win over England next Sat in the rugby and take the championship - next Sat for 80 mins - we will be enemies lol!
Okay - that's covered....

Molly I concur with Deb - take small steps, pick one thing to do to begin with. Any more than that will overwhelm you and you may then just give up on everything. Its like anything in life that seems difficult or insurmountable - tackle just one step, one thing at a time. Pick one thing to do, so the Aqua class and do it for a few weeks before you pick another thing? Don't even think of another thing until you've done the first thing and are comfortable with it?

Tithead I am sorry, I failed to even mention you yesterday, feel like I have left you out. How are you feeling today? Mothers Day here? Well, I did 4 washes, ironed for 2 hours, cleaned the upstairs, cooked dinner.... I did not give the kids cash to get me a card either. They did bake me a cake.... I got up Sunday morning to absolute bedlam in the kitchen. They did this cake at 2am Sunday morning, they washed up after but there was flour and icing all over counters and the floor

Any snow where you all are? None here.

Oh and Molly nobody thinks your worries and concerns and upset and/or depression is any less than a person who has kids to take care of.
It does not matter if you have no kids, one kid or 17 kids, if you are feeling crap, you are feeling crap.
I don't like it when others say 'Oh what are you complaining about!? I have to do x and y and z and then some...' Almost belittling what a person feels because their lives are busier/more complicated/harder.
No one person's situation can be compared to another's as they are all unique and individual circumstances. The people are different and the situations are complicated. So you won't hear that claptrap around here
x

Look at me with no morning life therefore able to post three times!
Its snowing here, that's all I wanted to say - am off to get my face on before I step out for art supplies for offspring #3 art gcse - why oh why do we have to pay for these things now? Bar humbug.
x

Hi threebats don't worry. We went to soft play and then had a take away for tea. We were planning on going to a farm but it was snowing in the morning. I know what you mean about the cakes ds and dp love baking but the mess they make is unbelivable. How is everyone today? Anyrhing nice planned?

Hi threebats Wales will win next weekend. Hi Molly,Tithead and everyone else too

I am originally from England and my sons are English but I have lived in Wales for so long I feel like I am honorary Welsh and my boyfriend is Welsh too. My eldest says I am a traitor and I should be supporting England but I feel my loyalty is with Wales. It's gonna be a tough day in our house regardless who wins I fear!

Today is a cold cold day. Snow has gone now and I hope it stays away. Lots of stuff to deal with in my mind too. Family dynamics and all that shite!

Had some jolly good neighbour call by the urge me to sign a petition and attend a meeting to object to travelers setting up camp about half a mile away - he wants a village green instead... ffs - A village green? Last time i looked, this was no bloody village?

The poor chap had the unfortunate luck to have knocked my door just as I was listening to Jeremy Vine and the whole debate about benefit caps and cuts and when a chap had just been on saying, the people at the top, politicians and bankers, have fecked up this country and the people who can least afford it are now paying for it - something I strongly concur with.
As the mother of a 19 year old with high end autism and aspergers facing his (formerly dla) pip being taken off us next month unless I fight like a dog on steroids to keep it let alone have it upped, God forbid they up the allowance, eh? Given he is now technically an adult therefore life is even more constricting and difficult and expensive for us...

This chap asked if he could come in, it was cold, heck of a wind and chill - I said no, its colder in my house than it is outside on account of the fact I can't afford to put heating on so best he stay where he was while he worries about his village green... Some of us have bigger things to worry about like, oh, heat or eat and no pension when old and no care for disabled young person forcing me to work for crap money, from home, while I care for him... This 'meeting' will eventually involve the council and local Mp's therefore, politics and fecked if I am getting involved in politics as they are all lying sods who could not give a stuff how actual real people live as long as their view is not soiled by a caravan or three on a site they earmarked to be a village fecking green.
He did pull a very alarmed expression - guess I should really shut my mouth and just nod like a good girl and sign a piece of darn paper when asked....

Hello, just checking in. There's a lot of thread to catch up on! Milly, sorry to hear you have been so down. The other VF's have been giving some excellent advice. Be kind to yourself and as the others have said, take baby steps. I have on/off depression too and when it hits badly I just withdraw into myself and become a bit of a hermit. It helps me to know that other people feel like that sometimes and I'm not a total nutter.

Threebats, your posts are very entertaining!

Blooming freezing here in Glasgow, little bit of snow overnight but most of it has gone now. Its been a busy few days as my other half is away for the week (work thing) so its just me running the show. Luckily the kids have been pretty good but I am totally knackered already and he's not back til Thursday. Hats off to those who do this all the time.

Well we had the weirdest weather here today. Woke up to snow, then bright sunshine, then snow, then sunshine on and off all day! Was bloomin cold mind you!

Hi Monstermuncher you will be fine! Every hour is an hour closer til your other half is home again

threebats now now surely the village green is of major importance to everyone My soon to be 16 year old is almost certain to be diagnosed with Aspergers and I am totally clueless as to where I go from here.

I hope everyone has had a good day

sorry for the excessive use of smilies!

Hi Debstar, I like the smiley faces. Kids are both tucked up in bed and I have wine, kettlechips and mumsnet for company! I also have a throw over my knees like an old lady and it feels pretty darn cosy.

I dont have any experience of Aspergers but there are plenty of people on here who do so perhaps they can offer some support.

Sounds like a great evening! Enjoy

deb I will try my very best to help you and I know a chap in Llanelli which is your council (Carmarthen is covered by Llanelli? Or the other way around anyhow!) Who works in the field and he will be invaluable to you if you need advice - he has autistic children himself so is not one of those people who talk the talk but have no idea how to walk the walk. My son was diagnosed with Aspergers at 5 and only recently diagnosed as High End Autism(he is 19) his ability with maths and computers is well, staggering...

I have to work today so I had to get dressed. Absolutely outrageous. Why am I not a lady of leisure, taken care of my my rich husband!?
If they put a village green on a derelict site that currently has a sign up stating 'Property of funeral director blah... blah...' Well, I for one will not be going there to, play? Are you even allowed to walk over a village green or will it have signs up saying 'Village Green - please do not walk on the grass for fear of displaying a disgusting view to those living close by...'

MONSTER So sorry we beat you Saturday in the rugby - if its any consolation, it was a rubbish game - didn't it score the highest ever penalties? We love the Scots down here in Wales so, I thought I would just say something about that...
Its Tuesday - two more sleeps to go till Thursday ;)

Cheers threebats, I'm not actually a scot, just married to one. I love Scotland but when it comes to matters of national pride (eg 6 nations) its England all the way ;-)

Yesss - two days til Mr Monstermuncher returns by which time I will be a shrivelled wreck gibbering in the corner

Have a good day folks

It was the same here yesterday Deb. Well I have had some good news today so I am feeling much more optimistic. How is everyone else?

I'm sorry.., no, really I am but monster Mr Monstermuncher! Just made me lol (as the kids would text!) I can't even go into where my mind went for a split second, had a terrible flash image - off to wash my brain out with soap and water after posting this...
Might I extend to you Monster the same courtesy as I have the others then, given you want England to win the rugby and I want Wales - at 4.50 Saturday we will be (pretend!) enemies... I know a lot of Welsh swear words as well so if I post up on here, nobody will have a darn clue what I am saying...

Are you going to extend upon your good news tithead or are we to be left guessing? Did you win the lottery? If so, I would like a truck full of Drumstick Lollies please (other lollies are available!) as I am slightly obsessed with them of late, my joy at finding - extra big ones - was just extreme. A sad reflection on what excites me these days. Did you find 5.00 in your jeans after washing them? I did on Sunday, it always feels good
Nothing of consequence has gone on around here today - picked up work, come home, doing said work, opening back door for cats like a glorified door man, in they come, out they go, in they come again... About to leave house and go forth into the Siberian wind to collect son from college...

Sorry Deb it would help if I elaborated wouldn't it. Well this will be rather long and maybe a bit self pitying so bear with me. I have been off work since november with severe abdo pain not knowing the cause. I had a similar episode 4 years ago but the cause was never found although it left me with IBS. Gp was concerned because of symptoms and bowel cancer is in the family. For weeks I have lay in bed unable to sleep thinking about things like colostomy bags, how I would feel about that. How would DP feel would he still love me/ find me attractive? We are currently planning our wedding and would look at lovely fitted dresses and then this niggling voice in the back of my head would say "won't look so nice with a colostomy bag will it".

At darker moments I would wonder if that was the cause 4 years ago and if so would it be terminal? What would that mean for DP and DS? Practical things like how they would cope financially would he have to give up work. If I died how soon would he meet some one else would DS call her mum? Would she take him to his first day at school? Would he remember what I looked/sounded like?

Anyway after that self pitying ramble (sorry but it feels better having written it down) I went to get the results of my CT scan today it Diverticulitus and divertular disease not the scary big C at all. So although I haven't won the lottery I bloody feel like I have, but I'm afraid you will have to wait for that truck load of lollys though.

Unfortunatly as you can imagine it's been a rather dark place in my 28 year old head so although I feel like a huge flippin weight has been lifted of my shoulders, for some reason I'm also feeling like I want to have a bloody good cry so will treat myself to some choclate and a load of snuggles tonight.

Wow that really was long wasn't it? Sorry.

Oh bugger threebats sorry I really do have a muddled head today.

Fantastic news TitHead well...not fantastic that you are ill but fantastic that things are better than you feared.

threebats I had a good laugh at MrMonstermuncher too...dirty minds stick together eh tee hee hee

Monstermuncher it's nearly Thursday woooooohoooooo! I'm sure your children need an early night tonight don't they

Am peed off with the woman who gave birth to me (refuse to call her my mum as her attitude towards me is not that of a mother) too long a story to go into but suffice to say it's clear I'm an inconvenience to her unlike my siblings.

Also peed off cos my lovely boyfriend won't be getting his birthday present first thing tomorrow because the stupid shop that promised it would be there yesterday still haven't got his present in that I ordered with them. Wish I'd bloomin ordered online now! Hopefully it will be there by the time he comes home from work!

Ooh you're a mucky minded lot Crisps for goodness sake!!

Tithead, you must be so relieved! Of course you must scoff chocolate and have lots of snuggles. A cry too if you need to.

Debstar, hope tomorrow brings your parcel and a better day all round

Threebats, I am ready to trade insults on Saturday. Bring it on

Btw I forgot to say thank you so much threebats for the offer of talking to your man in Llanelli! It's much appreciated!

Thank you too Monstermuncher and yeah I believe you that it's the crisps sorry must get out more!

Yawn, stretch, fart (kidding!) sip coffee - good morning all...
Tithead Hard to shorten your name to, just tit, I mean, its hard! But I might do it from now on just for the jest of it all - Of course you feel like crying - you've been sat about for ages almost holding your breath waiting for news - good news, but preparing mentally for bad.. You had the good news and all that stress must have washed off you like a wave washes sand off a body - have a cry. You deserve one. A good cry of relief is very good for us. I am happy to wait for the lolly's on the strength of your good news But, what is d and d disease? Is it easily cured or controlled?
deb The woman who gave birth to me, well, I also am not going into it as its too yuk so you are not alone. Somebody, somewhere, ought to set up a Black Sheep Club cause I would get in, I would even be able to produce a letter of certification from my mother if I asked her for one, to confirm I am the black sheep in my family. I would not need to have any test of any sort to get in after that! Slap a smile on your face, remember life is too short and do better with your children than was done with you - that's what I always think, no matter what the pain inside, find humour within the situation somewhere and you will get through. Its hard but its doable.
I can#t even talk to Monster as she's clearly today being waxed, oiled and preened in preparation for the Big Thursday... You know we will not hear from her tomorrow, right? And she will slink back on here come Friday telling us all how exhausted she is and how things are aching that have not ached for decades... Oh gross
x

Waaaaa! Chris Evans is playing Iron Maiden - Utter Joy.... Second song in a row now and poor offspring number 3 just got jumped by a rather overexcited 42 year old parent screaming, 'Can I play with Madness!' At her loudly.... After singing, '666 the number of the beast...' rather loudly... Oh! Oh! Third song in a row... Run to the Hills - Now we only need, Send your daughter to the slaughter' and my day is complete.... Oh bugger, he stopped. Gutted

Great start to the morning threebats

I would probably be an elite member of the Black Sheep Club! That smile is firmly fixed, my kids know I love them and it's my lovely fella's birthday today! All is good in the land of xxDebstarxx!

Monster hope you have a lovely day today and are refreshed and ready for the return of MrMonstermuncher tomorrow - kids have an early night so the welcome home can proceed

Tithead a good cry is a great stress release. I know what you mean about laying in bed imagining potential scenario's and it's always the worst ones you focus on! Onwards and upwards now

Hi all, can I join ye on this thread? For the last 15 years I have had 2 good friends, both these people knew each other through me but didn't mix socially together, however in the last 8-10 months their respective children are dating and I have now become the one on the outside. I am finding it hard to deal with but know that I have no right to interfere or comment on this friendship but it still hurts me. So virtual friends are what I need right now as I am feeling extremely lonely these days.

Hello Obrigada please do join us! Welcome

It's hard when things change and you can do nothing about it! Pull up a chair and a computer screen and chat away!

Thanks for the welcome Debstar Am feeling really tired today, have reduced my intake of coffee today and wondering if that has anything to do with it?

Welcome along Obrigada I personally think coffee is a must for posting up on this thread otherwise it would be a bit like bread without butter for me! However, I am a total coffee head so, any excuse really....
Can you substitute regular coffee for decaf? Go with regular till about midday then switch? If you get a good brand you honest to God can't tell the difference and you can fool your mind into thinking its the real, hard stuff

Iron Maiden was great this morning - but unfortunately as I was leaving the house for the pool then work, Julie Blinking Andrews was on Yodeling her way through life - yoda-ley-e yoda-lay-e yoda-ley-e-oooooooooo!
I was about fit to chop my head off by midday - all I could hear in my brain was that....

Happy birthday to deb's chap - dare I ask, did the gift come?

Hahahaha threebats what a nightmare for you! I hate having songs stuck in my head. For some reason for the last few months it has been 'bring me sunshine' so not only do I have the song I have the visual of eric and ernie too!

Yes his present has arrived thank goodness! Phew!!!!!!

Obrigada sounds like a lack of caffeine to me! Your body must be used to a certain amount and doesn't like that you've reduced it. I'm sure if you persevere you will be fine!

Oh threebats tha'ts some imagination you have there! Although I will of course be very pleased when Mr MM returns (I'm going to have to call him that so that you mucky lot don't start sniggering again), the reality is that I will most likely just hand over the kids and then go to bed for a week (alone).

Hello Obrigada, nice to have you here.

Debstar, glad you got your delivery - hope he likes it!

Have just noticed that Masterchef is back on. I like a bit of Masterchef. The baldy one has lost a load of weight, I don't think it suits him, he looks a lot older all of a sudden

Hi monster yes he did like it!

I think the baldy fella has a new young girlfriend and is probably scared he will lose her if he isn't supertrim! not that I read celebrity gossip oh no not me never

Good morning all!
The sun is shining here so Deb Thanks for repeatedly singing Eric and Ernie in your brain - must have worked!
I don't watch Masterchef on account of the fact I can't cook but I have seen the chap you are on about Obri I find it seriously hard to believe that a chef follows ww to loose weight though, somehow can't get my head around a chef counting points and eating a packet jelly to make up his quota for the day and feel as if he's had some form of a treat!
Had quite a day with my girls yesterday...
Elder dd (she's 21) asked, 'What's for dinner?'
I replied, 'Chicken.'
She went, 'Ohhh. Quack, quack.'
I sat at kitchen table and just waited - I said nothing.
Eventually she went, 'Oh! That's a duck init?'
Head in hands, hands on table, crossing legs because I have had three children and can't take sudden, hard laughter without a Pampers...
Then...
Took my youngest dd to drama last night and she squealed like the girl she is when a gritting lorry hurled grit at our car as it passed - she curled up in the passenger seat, knees up, hands over head and screamed like a girl.
We were in the car. The gritter was outside the car. In the car. Outside the car. In it. Outside it. The grit can't hit you, you wuss... And what did you expect to come flying out of the back of a gritter? Fluffy Marshmallows!? She did not stop laughing hysterically until I dropped her off...
I wish I had all boys...

Nooooooooo you don't threebats I live in a houseful of males. My two boys and my boyfriend all of the time and his boys on weekends. It's not pretty!!!! There is limited conversation just grunts when they acknowledge you are speaking but they are not listening oh no they are just pretending so you (as in me) don't go off on one. Mess everywhere because I refuse to pick up after them but they don't care because they know after a while I will do it.

Glad to be of service with the sunshine but would like a different song on repeat in my head...promise it won't be Rhianna's Umbrella hahahahahaha

I forgot to say monster Today is the day!
Are you all excited?

Deb I think I will take the boys - at least then I get to keep my jewellery, make-up, shoes... I will not be constantly told 'I am not eating anything white/green/orange this week! I am detoxing!'
'Can we talk Mam?'
Argh!! No! No we can't talk, honestly, what do you think I am? A caring parent or something? Where did you get that idea from??
Constant shouting along the lines of, 'Where's my hair gel? Who took it!? Get out of the bathroom! She took my jeans..! Waaaaaah!'
Then the dreaded - 'I have a new boyfriend!' Oh Mother of God Above - make it stop.... Please....
I stuck a note up above the loo last night that said, 'Attention! Do not flush baby wipes down the loo. Its properly illegal and the loo does not like it (drew a loo, crying) See its upset! Be kind to the loo, throw them in the bin...' I even copywritted (spelling?) it with a little copyright sign and dated it...
Within 5 mins of me blue-tacking it up - it was photographed and up on Facebook as apparently, it was 'hilarious'
The baby wipes are no longer down the loo this morning - no, they are balled up and shot across the bathroom like missiles to see if they can hit the bin and shouts of 'goal!' are ringing out... If they miss? Well, they are left on the floor where they land...
Oh how I wish I had all boys...
x

Hello all, Mr MM is on his way at last (yaay). I am totally knackered today, you know when you just feel tired to your very bones? I sometimes have real problems with sleep, I fall asleep easily enough but often wake at 2 or 3 then lie awake for hours. Hopefully the knowledge that Mr MM is safely back will mean I can sleep properly tonight and not be a zombie tomorrow.

Interesting showbiz gossip there Debstar about Baldybloke from Masterchef, that explains a lot!

Anyone else totally bored with red nose day? I realise this makes me sounds totally uncharitable but the whole thing does my head in ..

I'm the same Monstermuncher comic relief and children in need have me screaming at the telly. Not because I'm uncharitable but I get cross that celebrities who have more money than I can dream of are telling me to give my money. Whereas if they all gave one weeks wages to NOT do something stupid for charity they would raise just as much money and we wouldn't have to suffer the stupid programmes on tv or radio. Also, I have my own family to worry about and we are not made of money

Rant over!!! Sorry I went off on one there!

Anyway yay Mr MM is nearly home wooooohooooooo

Good morning all!
Is he back then mm?
Comic Relief? Well, the good news is, for a pound, its no school uniform which means I can get the washing started today rather than the mad rush of tonight/tomorrow morning. Its bought me an extra 8 hours which I am thankful for!
I also will have given a pound so will not have my good senses ripped apart when I am bombarded by Tv, radio and daft people in shops dressed up telling me all about the starving and sick kids - I have given thanks...
If Jessie J was going to tape her gob up for 6 months rather than shave off her hair though - I would definitely give more
x

Hi all TitHead here under a name change. New name for a new chapter. Threebats that toilet sign story made me chuckle. Welcome Obrigada. Hi everybody else. Still a bit of an emotional waterfall at the mo but giving myself till Monday to let it all out.

I love rawbrocoli! Its very nice indeed to crunch on!
Am angry with my Gp nurse today - had an appointment for my son to go get his ear syringed, deaf as a post it is thanks to wax. Tried all the usual remedies, nothing worked. Phoned last week for an appointment today. Had a phone call a couple of hours before the appointment from nurse saying she couldn't do it unless I bring him in immediately. I couldn't, son has Autism, knew he would flip his lid at thought of going out of the house to a strange place impromptu, even though he knew he was going today, he was meant to go at 2.20 not 11.30 - Routine and all that means to him, she had no clue at all when I tried to explain it to her, she laughed at me down phone after I explained this in a 'we are all in this together' kind of tone and said, 'Oh we are both mothers, I am sure you understand I have to be somewhere with my daughter this afternoon...' Was furious so hung up.
Tried and failed to get son up. It was murders here. He would not go. Called the surgery back and stormed at the receptionist after being told it was another 3 week wait for an appointment that, I am self employed therefore when I take time off work to attend an appointment for my child it actually costs me money. When your nurse takes time off work for her daughter she still gets paid. I did not appreciate her 'we are both mothers here' remark as frankly, it was cheeky. Asked for an appointment with our Doctor because, staggeringly, I asked the receptionist what his notes said about his disability - nothing except for a severe speech and language disorder - and suddenly it all becomes clear why DLA cut his allowance to half last time he was assessed... Am now very, very cross and am only glad I have to wait 4 weeks to see our doctor as any sooner and I would have gone into the room wielding a vicious tongue, terrible bad language and made a complete arse of myself in the process.... Grrr.... Flipping Gp surgeries!

flippin heck threebats that's awful and what a stupid bloody comment. Poor you and your son it must have been rather unsettling for him. I don't know much about autism, I have a nephew on the Aspergeges spectrum (is that the correct phrase?) I understand there completely different but I know how he would have reacted to a sudden change in routine like that. How incompetent of the surgery with the notes also you must be so frustrated

Ah, its the same all over the place Broc - you can't get the flipping staff these days. You would not believe the hoops I have had to jump through for my son... I get cross but fume here until the red mist has passed and then I go deal with it. Learned a long time ago it does not pay to loose your temper. Its far, far better to hang up immediately and go away to calm down before I go getting sarcastically horrible with people, which I tend to do, which is not pleasant at all.

Besides - right after that, elder daughter who is 21 and pregnant went to the dentist with what we thought were 2 fallen out fillings... Coincidence, you say? You'd be right. Its her wisdom teeth, one is breaking through her gum and is infected, the other going the same way and they both need to come out asap - unfortunately she is asthmatic so the dentist had to call the surgery to talk about this as she can not be given antibiotics without the Doc saying so and having surgery to pull wisdom teeth out on an asthmatic young woman who is 4 months pregnant is questionable but she has lost 2 stone in 3 months thanks to morning sickness already and now she can eat, she can't eat thanks to teeth - they are worried about he baby's development if she carries on not eating and her own health.... They are debating the whole thing while she lays in bed here with spaghetti in a tin (God help the lack of nutrition!) because that she can suck over actually eat. Her boyfriend is being as lovely as he can be but she is in pain and only allowed to take paracetamol... Short tempered? Don't talk! I might go into hiding till they decide what to do with her!

Its good to have somewhere to vent but so wrong that you have to. Your poor daughter what an awful time you are all having. [Flowers] look after yourself.

I am absolutely okay brocoli don't go worrying about me - am tougher than I look. This is how I can be of some help to deb if her son gets diagnosed with Aspergers as I have jumped that many hoops I know how high to jump and what flipping shoes I need to wear to get a good height going!
Am not going to be complaining to the Doc for this oversight on son's medical records - I will simply be requesting a letter drawn up by himself for the DLA people stating exactly the problems/difficulties and exactly why, in his opinion, the award for DLA is wrong - he will do it. I have known this doc for a long time, many years... He knows things about me I am sure he would rather not! He is a reasonable man, a nice man - this was clearly an oversight which I will be asking, nicely, he correct and then make up for. Simple as that. I am very tenacious
Daughter will get sorted out as she has the Midwife on her side so this is not simply a case of dentist/doctor surgery trying to get their shit together - the Midwife won't sit idly by after the already 2 stone weight loss... We are all very excited and hugely looking forward to this baby - we've suffered a lot of bereavement over the last 2 years and have also lost my extended family in its entirety, completely. So when she announced she was pregnant at 21, well 22 when the baby is corn, far from slumping down in a chair in terrible shock - its something to be celebrated - its a new life, its a new start, its an addition to what is a small family unit now. She is just qualified as a beauty therapist so can work after baby is born, be it self employed or in a salon. She has possibilities and her boyfriend and his family have gone crazy over this baby - they are even more looking forward to it than we are which means its all okay - the baby is eagerly anticipated and wanted. We are all just waiting for August!
x

Okay then Ladies! After the moaning posts above - this is it - Saturday 16th March - 4.50pm - KICK OFF!
I have heard through the grapevine (the rugby club and a neighbour who was there last night!!) That the Welsh boys are 'completely up for this' They are almost growling to go...
As things stand right now at this minute, I guess the score is England 8 Wales 0....
We can take that as a given as Wales need 8 points to steal the championship 7 points means we go on tries scored throughout competition - Wales win as they scored more tries....
I respectfully wish my English VCF's good luck and happy kicking but I hope a brisk south easterly arrives each time you get the opportunity to kick, lots of ball dropping and plenty of blood time outs, sin bins and accidental slips when heading for the try line..!
May the scrum commence!!

(not that I am at all excited about it, of course)

Ha ha threebats you don't sound excited at all x

Waaahhhhhh! Oh my God - having trouble breathing! We won!!!
x

Congratulations threebats, you sure gave us a pasting!
How are you doing Brocoli?

I'm okay I think Monster not had much time to think this weekend as DS has had a vomiting bug so DP and I have been knee deep in sick. He seems a little better today thankfully. DP is insisting we all go for a walk this afternoon. He thinks it will do me good to get out for a bit. I know he's right but curling up in bed with a book sounds so much more appealing right now.

Seeing the gp on monday about pain managment. I'm taking tramadol at the min as its the only thing that takes the edge off the pain but its aggrivating the diverticular disease. Think I'm just going to offload tell him exactly how I'm feeling and take it from therem I'm sure I'll feel better when I get back to work and things get back to normal.

Coughs under breath and blushes slightly - there I was banging on about stupid problems that are easily solved really when brocoli you are having such a tough time.
And I meant to ask yesterday but got totally carried off with rugby molly how are you? Where are you?
Monster has emerged back onto the thread so I assume all welcome home greetings have been carried out!?
And Deb Are you okay?

Am still trying to get my head around the rugby yesterday - I actually felt bad for the English right from the start as it was a psychological game to make them wait on the pitch for the time we did before we came out. The roof was closed on stadium, its the only stadium that has a roof to close and the English team are a very young team - most of the players have never been to Cardiff to play before and I promise you, its very special in that place, its very intimidating - with the roof closed, the noise is horrendous and we sang so loudly at the start that was that I reckon - it was too much for the young English team. Too daunting, too huge perhaps? Don't get me wrong, at each try we scored the roof almost came off my house and the game itself was a hard, physical game which was driven by Wales so they deserved to win but in all honesty? Wales had too much of a home advantage. And that's coming from a Welsh person!
Now its all over, I have no idea at all what I will do with my weekend afternoons - perhaps get back to painting my bloody door frames?
x

Oh Threebats there not stupid problems at all. I'm sure in a few weeks time I will look back at this and wonder what all the fuss was about

hello everyone, I hope you are all having a good day

Yay to threebats for the six nations win! I have one very happy boyfriend and one pissed off son!

Brocoli I hope the GP can sort out some effective pain management for you that doesn't aggravate your condition. Definitely offload on him...that's what he's there for.

Monstermuncher I hope you are enjoying Mr MM being home in whatever way you can sheksy stuff or just for his childcare ability!!!

Thanks for asking if I'm ok threebats. The short answer is NO. I'm having a hard time right now. Family stuff with woman who gave birth to me, friend stuff with my one RL friend, and more family stuff with my boyfriend's children. I'm also trying to set up a business because we are skint (due to family and friend problems above and my stupidity). Sometimes I wonder what's the point of me. If it wasn't for my children I'm not sure I'd still be here to post!

Deb There is a HUGE point to you. Do not define yourself on other people's actions - we can not control what happens to us/what other people do but we can control how we react to what happens/what they do.
I can't say on a public forum what has happened in my family but I will say I have no family left aside from my children. Its me and them - against the world! Imagine a family tree, see me cut out of the big family one and a wee baby one started all on its own with my name on the top.... Its taken a long time, a lot of struggle and a large heaping in of incredibly horrible pain - but - in the end, its okay. Its okay because I, as you, have the children and do not underestimate the pride that can be found in raising them well. One day, you wake up and you just think and feel, to hell with the lot of them, who gives a shite? The people that matter are within my 4 walls and to hell with everybody else outside of the walls.
As for stupidity - we are all entitled to be stupid. So you've messed up? Okay then, you have. Leave it there and go on forward learning the lesson and not repeating the stupidity in future - its not worth torturing yourself over.
Nothing is so bad that it can not be fixed or rectified with some hard work and patience We just think its all impossible, that's all. Everything seems scary until we actually do it.
I would miss you if you were not posting on here so that's another person along with your children who thinks there is a point to you!

Hey Debstar. Sorry you are going through a rough time. I only know you through your posts on here but from what you write you come across as a warm and caring person with a good sense of humour (plus a sound knowledge of current celebrity gossip. I like that in a person). In other words, a good person and the sort of person I, and others, want to get to know. You have virtual friends here who will listen if you want to vent.

And yes Mr MM is safely back chez Monster and its lovely to have him back :-)
It is freeeezing here today. Where did the springtime go?

thank you both. I don't mean to whinge, sorry. I'm just fed up of being taken for granted by everybody. I'm such a doormat. I need some tips on how to be more assertive and not be taken for a ride. Only trouble is when I've done that before people have got so arsey with me I've reverted back to type.

No apology needed Debstar. We all need to let off a bit of steam from time to time

Thank you. I find weekends incredibly difficult and sometimes it gets too much. I'm glad I have the VCF to vent too.

Sorry your having a bad time Deb I think you come across as a great person and an amazing virtual friend. You rant and whinge away all you want if it helps I certainly have.

Well DP insisted on the walk today. He arranged for my DB to watch DS for a bit. We walked to nowhere in the freezing bloody cold and then turned into the golf club. So I was rather Peed off and thinking WTAF? When he walks to the door of the function room and walks into a wedding fair. DP is certainly not the wedding fair type at all. I was so touched I nearly cried. We got back he has just put DS to bed and ordered a take away. It's been such a lovely unexpected day.

People do not like it when you step outside of their idea of you deb That is their problem not your problem. Until you start to live your life being yourself and not bending who you are to meet somebody else's idea of who you should be, you are going to struggle.
You can always come here and vent this is the VCF nobody on here is going to bark at you, this is a nice place
x

What a lovely surprise for you Brocoli I'm glad you had a good day!
You are right threebats people like it when I conform to their idea of who I am. I have to be me more often I may need support for this so will definitely be venting on here!

Your kind words have really touched me. I really do appreciate them. Thank you all.

Yes brocoli I am glad you had a good day also. A wedding fair? You'd have to kick me dragging and screaming into a wedding fair though - not exactly the marrying type Born to live by the seat of my pants, fly by the slight of the wind and run kicking and screaming from 'do you take this man?'
No I fecking don't and you can't make me either... There is not enough cake in the world to make me want to get married....
Good news - I listed some things on Ebay today to kick off at 8.30 this evening. My phone is vibrating non stop as it informs me that some have been bid on and some on the buy it now option have already sold. Am super happy as I began my year of being frugal this month - albeit 2 months late but I have begun it and this is only helping me so, here is to a good bidding week on Ebay. have now turned off the phone though as I really ought to consider some sleep as its Monday tomorrow and we all have to heave on up out of bed for the start of another week....
I swear the weather chap said it was going to snow here next week - did I imagine that?

Unfortunately not threebats they are sending more snow

I am going to try and be more positive and assertive this week. I'm sick of being a doormat but the only person I can change is men not those that treat me like shit and expect me to roll over and take it.

Deb No. The smallest word you can imagine yet the hardest to say at times. Expect a reaction from all those you say it to - they are not going to like you not conforming to their ideal of what you ought to be doing...
A small, tiny, wee example was my youngest this weekend, 'Mam, when you drop me into town on Saturday...'
'Uh, I am not dropping you into town Saturday. You want to go? You get the bus.'
'Pardon? Do what? You always drop me into town...'
'Yeah, I do don't I? Well I don't fancy it this weekend, I have plans...'
Stunned silence and a huge sulk later, she was on the bus. Did her no harm at all and got me off a petrol bill, an hour in snarled up traffic and a lousy mood for the rest of the day.
Just brace yourself for others reactions and get your reaction to those reactions sorted in your mind - as in, don't react. Don't get mad. Don't answer back. Don't let them pistol whip you with guilt. It'll be misplaced guilt on your part. I always reckon, if you are going to feel guilty about something, at least make it something worth feeling guilty about! Yeah, like that extra large bar of chocolate I ate last night and the pool training I skipped this morning! Not what I did not do for somebody over the weekend as I was busy!
x

Too true threebats I will practice saying the hardest word to say!

Have made myself giggle reading my previous post the only person I can change is men obviously I meant me!!!

No you didn't, you meant men... You are the oracle of all that is men... Please pop in and change my son? Then pop next door and change the chap that lives there as every Sunday morning, without fail, he drills things. When you're done there its over the road to the man that likes to come around inspecting people's gardens each summer, you know, so the place looks tidy He acts like he's just out for a leisurely stroll but I am telling you - he mentally measures the grass length as he goes. And finally, when he is changed please, please, for the love of all that is Holy - change David Cameron, Osbourn who, frankly, gives Ozzie a very bad name indeed and Clegg the Peg - he needs a complete change does he...

An update on the village green - apparently 1,000 people turned out to campaign for one - 1,000 people!? Yeah and I'm Cindy bloody Crawford - there can not possibly be 1,000 people living around here and if there were? Imagine the damage they will all do to the bloody village green

Hahahahahaha you do make me laugh threebats thank you

Village bogswamp more than village green after 1000 people have been tramping over it I guess.

Oh to be the oracle of all that is men. My home would be a haven then.

I tried being assertive today via facebook and set someone off on a rant because I objected to him using the phrase one of my best friends is... to justify his nasty comments. Apparently I have had a sense of humour bypass and failed to see him as the awesome man he is. Swiftly deleted off my friend's list. Next step...assertiveness is RL.

No but I am Cindy Crawford - God damn it why don't people believe me?

Facebook - the absolute horror of it - I am not on facebook, do not want anybody finding me - when I moved into this house back this time last year (when the sun shone hot, the air was dry and a hose pipe ban was being whispered about - ahhh.., those were the days, snow on Thursday!) My neighbour who drills a lot on Sunday mornings, cornered me outside as I was attempting to parallel park my car- now that you had to see to believe - not parallel parked in years! Anyhow, he corned me and went, 'Hey! Its you!' Shouted my name. I sort of looked about me as I got out of the car, all confused as to whom he was talking to, 'Its me!' He announced. Understood, at his point, that he was actually talking to me so took a step or two quickly towards my gate thinking, who the feck is this nutter..? 'From school, remember? God, can't believe you're living next door...' On he went and he's living with a lovely lady has a lovely son, owns his house, great job - and I am going,'Oh, left him, yeah.., that's right, renting, mmm, three kids yes, 4 cats, those are all mine, yes, yes, that's correct. No, no job.... 'Didn't I do well!' Slink into house, bash head against wall and pray to God the next time I see him I can actually remember his name as he never told me who he was, I did not recognise him and I could not remember him from school at all!
Turns out he is a lovely man actually, his girlfriend is nice but really - this is the reason I do not go onto Facebook - I will go on it, when I am rich and famous and married to Jack Bouer from 24 but until then - nope!

Well done deb for taking the first foray into standing up against somebody's nasty comments!
x

Haha threebats you have such a way with words I have an image now of you arms and legs flaying (sp) everywhere being dragged down an aisle whilst being force fed wedding cake.

I hate that phrase deb do you not always find that it is followed by something offensive? Well done you on confronting them.

Morning all,
Sun is shining here again, am starting to get suspicious now - that's two days in a row I have needed to drive with shades on...
I don't disagree with marriage brocoli I'm all for a good divorce settlement and a share of a good pension
Hope everybody is well this morning - off for a shower!

sssssshhhhhh don't tell the sun it's shining it will run away and hide again!!!! Yep the sunglasses are needed here too!

Hahahaha threebats When my exhusband and I divorced I got the kids and the car, he got the playstation and the cat. Within a week he had sold both so I'm pleased the kids came with me

Yes Brocoli that phrase is on a par with no offence meant but and I don't mean to be rude!

threebats when you are rich and famous and married to Jack Bauer from 24 don't forget the VCF!!!!!!!

Sorry threebats u paint such a picture the vision just popped into my head. Oh yes deb that is another stupid one its basically saying I'm going to say something to offend you know but you are not allowed to be offended by it

I actually didn't get the phrase you were on about deb Afraid things have got to be spelled out in big, clear letters for me! all I got was that somebody was horrible and you stood up.... Oh! Oh! I got it! I just re-read it and got it!
Duh! Honest to God, I need a lobotomy... Little wonder my children can get things past me before I know what's happened. Like my eldest today asking what time I am picking up her brother from college and I blithely go tell her without wondering why she is asking as she is not there today and she then says, 'great, you can pick up my mate and take her home too, she's expecting you...'
Wtf just happened? I'm doing what? Who is this friend?

I have just completed my work for the day and am choosing to ignore the mess that is my downstairs and an off upstairs to carry on with my writing - upstairs, I have a view of the entire neighbourhood and can easily spy on others without being noticed. I also have a stash of drumstick lollies hidden in the knicker drawer and its only a swoosh over the floor on my chairs castors to get to them!

I will never forget the VCF's when I am rich and famous and married to Jack Bouer from 24 - I will get him to teach me all the good torture moves and come online with a video aid and show you all how they are done! But there will be no wedding cake left over sorry ladies - If I have to get married to Jack Bouer from 24 than I am eating all the cake myself...

Jack Bauer is yummier than cake...

Hello all! I am very jealous of your sunshine, there's not a scrap of blue sky out there today and we have snow. Just the very light stuff that doesn't lay down but snow nonetheless.

Facebook is an odd one. I like to browse as I am quite nosey but then get mightily annoyed with it. The ones who post something like "oh no" just to get a reaction and so 10 others will immediately post "whats up?". The ones who take photos of their every meal. Some folk really do spend their life on it. Thank goodness my two are too young for all that, there are some total nutters out there. Anyhoo, I am being summoned by my two year old master so I'd better go and supervise ..

Ahh you have a 2 year old master as well Monster mine has just been sent home poorly from playschool and is currently using me as his own personal human matteress.

Awww bless him Brocoli I hope he feels better soon. Monster and Brocoli I can't remember the days when my boys were two. I think I've blocked it out My teenagers tend to ignore me now unless they need food, money or a lift somewhere.

Glad to hear you won't forget the VCF threebats even if you won't share the cake what writing are you doing? Sorry if I'm being nosey asking that.

I hope Brocoli Jnr is feeling better. Toddlers are just relentless aren't they? The days I spend at home with him are far more tiring than the days I am actually at work.

Are you feeling OK today Debstar?

No sun here today ladies so, less of the jealousy now
Good morning!
brocoli hope the little one is better today? monster will need you and brocoli in a few months when daughter births the first Grand-offspring - can't remember a darn thing about babies and toddlers. She asks me questions and I shrug, its all completely gone. Quite shocking considering I did it 3 times over!

My writing deb well, I can't say exactly what it is as I don't want the idea poached online by a lurker or something. I had the idea years ago after hearing the story behind a Meatloaf song. Not one of his more well known songs. I was simply just stunned by the song and thought up an entire 500 page book based on it. Not like it at all, based on the story in the song - don't laugh now - I have a letter here that I intend to take to the concert in April and try to give to him asking his permission to use the lyrics in the opening credits of the book - I want his personal permission - I know its tragic for a woman my age - I am afraid to post it off, even though I have stalked out his home address and thought of camping outside it for a wee while if I had the air fare to The States! Cause the odds of him actually reading it? Or, popping up behind a bush when he is here playing golf! My last ditch idea was to contact Chris Evans as he knows and likes Meat and if I wrote to him and asked him to ask Meat? I mean, its not like asking for an autograph, is it? Its an unusual request, might pique his interest?
Anyhow, my sad, pathetic and totally brilliant crush on Meat aside - this book has been an almost labour of love - its far more important to me than any of the others I have written then printed out and stored away - this one has sat on my desk for years. I dream about it, I think about it, I have a music score for it. It frustrates me, it angers me, it winds me up, it taunts me, it laughs at me. But I love it. I have research everything in it to within an inch of what is reasonable - I even went to New York 6 years back in the days of having a partner with a good job and spent 10 days walking the city so I could get accurate descriptions in it. This is my absolute final re-write of it and I am absolutely going to send it out to publishers - gulp - this is it, the rest of this year is the final re-write and I am going to copyright it I think as I can't bear anybody nicking it as their own work not mine, then sent it out.... I am trying not to think about that part of it all as I am bricking it - I shall be on it all today, it will help me avoid the bloody budget!
x

Oh wow threebats that sounds amazing! I love reading and that sounds like something I would race to read. Try any means possible to contact Meat. I always like to think of him as a kind hearted soul.

I'm ok Monster thanks for asking. Putting my brave face on and conquering the day

Well Brocoli is back to his normal energetic self today but after the constant stream of sick and pooh that has been the past 24 hours I have just realised every last item of clothes he has is either wet or in the wash and the gas went this morning so I'm going to have to take him out in his pre school uniform. Its his normal day at school today so I am preparing for the mother of all tantrums when we don't go.

Wow threebats that sounds like an amazing book so excited and keeping everything crossed for you.

I think we block out the worst bits of child raising to con us in to doing it all again. I remember someone telling me when I was pregnant that the first 9 months where the hardest. Eh? They where a breeze and now I hear that the terrible twos are nothing compared to three, oh god I hope not.

Am taking a chicken sarnie break from the writing...
And have dropped ketchup all over my keyboard while eating said sarnie... swore a lot.
brocoli great that your son is well again - don't even talk to me about gas and the cost of it and drying clothes and all that is connected with all of it... I encourage offspring and myself to remain in Pj's and dressing gowns at all times while indoors - far less washing and drying to do. Its almost a treat to get dressed in clothes to go go outside now - but all neighbours think we are buggering, arse lazy slobs as a consequence of the bed clothes all day long - open the door in them, put bins out in them, go up garden in them. Wait till Easter - weeks will go by where no sod actually gets dressed here!

Have spent an incredible amount of time looking up Amtrak Trains this morning, sleeping cars and refreshments and do not disturb door signs and ID needed and actual real train stations, times and connecting buses from one state to the other and cost and time involved in journey and freight trains delaying passenger trains and blinds on windows or curtains...? Arghhhh! It might have been easier to actually go over there and take an Amtrak... Straight to Meatloaf's house where I could stand outside his plush pad and scream at the top of my lungs, 'I would do anything for love! But I WON'T DO THAT (again) Meat! Oi! You listening to me in there? Get out here and take it like a man...' Oh, well, that last bit was my own personal and private thoughts - apologies...

After Amtrak-gate I had to go and look up - grasshoppers - yes, that's right - which quickly switched to Crickets as Grasshoppers are tricky. Crickets are far more likely to reside by a lake on a dirt track road leading to a small town in Iowa... I even U-tubed them to hear the noise they make so I could be ACCURATE.
I am buggering off again now before the news comes on the radio as radio is always on in kitchen - do not want to hear about the budget!
x

Oh good I am so glad it's not just me that keeps DS and me in PJ's all day if were not going out. In fact when I get him dressed he automatically gets his coat because he knows we are going out.

As for the price of gas arrgh it drives me mad this house eats it just for fun. Good luck with the book. You have such a talent with words your posts always make me smile and I can actually picture the scene if that makes sense I'm sure it will be hugely successful.

brocoli that's exactly what my kids do! If I say, get dressed, they do and they go get their shoes and coats....
We also have copious amounts of blankets - never has my fascination with collecting blankets been so popular than this last year or two. My son does not even mind having the blankets with the flowers on them, not anymore, not when he complained, 'I am not a girl you know...' So I took them off him and wrapped them all around myself on the couch - he went, quite literally, pale, begged for them back so I said, 'Yeah okay - soon as you admit you are a girl!'
And hot water bottles - like a gift from God himself, mini radiators to carry about with you - bliss. I have one by my feet, one on my belly and another on my arse - I totally do - a cold arse is not to be taken lightly. So, you lay on the couch (you've got to nab the couch first though, its a first come, first served basis job - first one there gets it for the night). Put a hot water bottle by your behind, another on your feet, then wrap up in 2 blankets then cuddle in the third hot water bottle - we all have 3 hot water bottles each! Spoiled suckers we are

Oh yes yes yes to hot water bottles and blankes. We always snuggle on the sofa under blankets. The other week I got the duvet down as it was rather cold DS thinks its great and now when I put the blankets on the sofa he says no mummy get big blanky and I have to go up and get the duvet. He as also set his sights on my hot water bottle. He keeps saying share mummy quickly followed by "I go" which means my turn first. I am going to have to get him one of his own and treat myself to another one or two at the same time obviously. He loves being snuggled up in his pj's under a blanket with a hot drink. No idea where he gets it from (whistles innocently).

We should get sofabeds brocoli Or would that be going too far? That way, we can have a bedroom in the living room and never need to leave the blankets/hot water bottle situation for anything other than a run to the bathroom and a quick pee! Can't wait for this weather to break - its brutal.

Can't believe its Thursday already - this week has flown...

That sounds like a very tempting idea Threebats however I fear that I would never actually move if that was the case. This week really has flew by hasn't it I think I blinked and missed it.

Why bother with a bathroom lol get a commode ewwwww!!!

I'm stuck to the sofa today until 1.30 when I'm taking my eldest to his CAMHS appointment. I feel so ill today but can't miss that!

Deb My youngest is on some form of Military March down your way today - just dropped her at the Air Force Base and they are off in a Squadron bus heading your way - official day off school for this and everything caue she's a Corporal - its going to be on telly apparently but fear that means S4C and wedged in between Pobol y Cwm and Newyddion - so blink and you miss it! That's even if you can understand it!
Just giving you fair warning - she is lead drum - and she is loud! Where possible, close all windows, turn up radio loud and stay indoors as there's a lot of them going and they all have instruments - the bells are particularly grating if you've anything resembling the start of a headache
x

I've already got a banging headache so a bit more banging won't be noticed

what a fab thing for her to be doing! Proud mum moment I bet! If it is on S4C then I'm sure it will be on their version of iplayer so if you do miss it you can see it later on.

Eldest daughter (the one up the duff ) is an Officer in this Squadron - You have no idea how many marches I have attended over the years. Parades. Air shows. Poppy collecting activities. Award giving ceremonies - how many official skirts I have had to take up then take down as they grew taller! The badges needed to be sewed on. The shirts to starch wash. The utterly manky clothes almost boil washed after Duke of Edinburgh Award treks. Actually threw most of those away... They always pick the worst sodding weather to go off camping/trekking in...
They both have 8 Military GCSE's as well - well, my youngest will have them by the end of this year.
I know more about what flies over our sky's than is healthy thanks to being told constantly what it is that is going over us....
My eldest once flew a glider over our back garden and circled it there. MY poor elderly neighbour almost scarpered back into her house, possible WW2 flashbacks! I had a suspicion it was my eldest but couldn't prove it till she got home and told me... I told nobody at all on the street!
Oh and they can use guns as well - they go on shooting days....
Its all good news for my youngest whose main desire in life is to become an actress and be the first female Die Hard star.... Yippe-kai-a-mother.... Well, you know the rest!
x

Oh wow that's fantastic, apart from the washing, ironing and sewing you've had to do

I sent my eldest there at 13 because it was something to do for her for 2 evenings a week, it was free bar the 2.00 a week sub money. Uniforms were lent out free, all days out were free, picked up by the Air Force - even the major air shows all around the country were free for them to go to if they went in uniform. Free gliding lessons and so on and on - I thought, well, not only is this free but it will keep her off the streets as she gets older. Little did I realise it was going to become a huge part of her life and her sister after her. It has become a huge part of life around here and in all honesty? Rather it be this way than have them hanging about all the time doing nothing of consequence with their free time even if it does mean a lot of getting up at 5am mornings to drop them at the base so they can go off and do this or that. Its great, the photo's I have got with them all uniformed up, getting awards and laying poppy wreaths and so on.
Considering how massively I have managed to feck up my life up to this point - at least I have not managed to feck the kids up too much, although, give me time I suppose, there is plenty of time left to seriously screw them all up

Oh gosh I've failed miserably on mine using their spare time wisely. Xbox and computers all the time!

You sound like an amazing mum with equally amazing children. Be proud of yourself threebats

Oh deb my son spends his every waking minute on his Runescape game, he can play 3 games at the same time I swear to God - and not miss a beat on one. Last night he had his Pc game going, a Simpsons game going on daughters Ipad thingie and he was on his DS.... My brain hurt just watching the three screens moving never mind playing the games.
My eldest always had the ability within her to be very, very naughty so I curtailed it with an activity based on discipline - the Air Force! I am such a lazy bugger I did not want to be dealing with the fallout from naughty kids! SO I sent them all away to men in uniform to do it for me!

Hello VCFs. Am typing this from my bed under several layers of duvets and blankets. Our boiler is on the blink so we are without heating until tomorrow (waaaa). Bed is simply the warmest place in the Monster household this evening. It can be fixed, the chap came out today but needed some extra parts and thankfully he can be back tomorrow. Good thing he can as its very,very cold here and is set to remain so all weekend. Its like being a student all over again when I lived in the coldest house ever.

Hope the military march went well threebats, you must be a very proud mum.

monster Ah scourge - the broken down boiler. My sympathies Hot Chocolate for you!
Are you meant to be having the snow? Do you live in that part of the country? We have pelting rain and bloody howling wind here tonight. It is quite literally slashing over the flat roof in this wee kitchen here, sounds absolutely horrendous. I keep looking up to check I am not about to have the roof lifted off and aliens come take me to their space ship and have to call a roofer in tomorrow... It really sounds that bad out there. But cold, urgh, nothing worse than cold. Hope he fixes it for you tomorrow then you can make out with the radiator!
Cwtch up warm...

The last born arrived home bloody freezing, couldn't feel her feet, tired, aching and promptly ate almost all the contents of the fridge - back to flipping Aldi in the morning...
My eldest has done my gel nails tonight a sparkling dark chocolate brown colour - very nice indeed! She's plucked eyebrows and threatened to get the hot wax out - at that point I fled shouting, 'You come near me with that stuff and as God is my witness - you will go live in the shed.' Its her job - well, what she's trained to do and will do when her small person arrives - Beautician on call here - fabulous!

I rarely see my boys anymore now they are teenagers it is literally for food and lifts ... I don't know if that's a good or bad thing

monster I hate the cold. Keep yourself wrapped up.

threebats I would love to have a beautician on call. I have horrible chin hair that drives me mad that I would love to be eradicated. It's especially annoying at the moment because with my preschool classes we are doing the three little pigs story and one of the lines is not by the hairs on my chinny chin chin. Makes me cringe!

Not far from you deb If you ever feel fed up and want a treat, give me a shout and daughter will only be too happy to have you come over and have the works done - she charges far, far less than a salon as she has 3 months to go before she gets her proper certificates to say she is qualified - she does all the neighbours and she has all the proper salon equipment, massage table, proper salon waxing things and nail things here. I will provide you with coffee, biscuits and hilarity and you will little doubt, leave here all preened and feeling smug that your house runs smoother than my house, you have less wrinkles than I do and you have not had to just said sorry for the cat puking on the floor right by a visitors feet! Children welcome.
It is raining here. That by the way is an understatement! It raining so hard here its like the god of rain is having a massive tantrum. I have to go out in this - within 5 seconds the bottoms of my jeans will resemble a wet mop... I am wearing my hat - hell if I am going to wash my hair to go out in this.
monster here is to oyur boiler working by the end of today!
x

Nooooo! Boiler parts now not available til Monday. I may be dead from hyperthermia by then. We have snow on the ground from overnight but its not too bad. Bet its warmer outside than it is in the house right now. Will just have to visit lots of family and friends over the weekend. I may be offline for a bit as my fingers will have dropped off. Have a good weekend all and remember your old mate Monster shivering in the frozen north (brrrrrrrrrr)

Its very snowy and cold here in the north west Monster Brocoli junior is poorly again so we are snuggled up under the duvet on the sofa. DP is out tonight and on overtime tomorrow so I think it's going to be a very long two days.

No. Now that is not fair - I am so sorry you are cold still monster but bloody hell - we have no snow at all - going to throw a proper tantrum now.
Had to take my waders, boat and snorkeler out to do the flood shopping - rain, it always rains, if its going to be foul, at least let it be snow foul.
Totally gutted.

Do you have an electric heater monster? Can you beg, borrow or steal one form somebody for a couple of days? Or worth getting one perhaps so at least one room is warm?

Get well soon little brocoli Get Mam to give you lots of cake and sweets and chocolate.
x

monster that's so not on! I'd be steaming with anger though at least that would warm me up a bit wrap up in duvets and as many layers as possible! Wear hats gloves and woolly socks...important to keep your extremities warm so the rest of your body is fooled into thinking you are warmer than you are. I grew up in a freezing cold house with no central heating and that's what we did.

brocoli I hope your little one gets well soon. Snuggles and cuddles and lots of laziness I think!

threebats it's horrible isn't it. Can I borrow your boat lol I need to go to the shops for food but the wind is so strong I think I will need weights on my ankles. Can you wish for snow where you are but leave it away from me? I hate the stuff!

It must be bad because he won't eat anything. He is always hungry usually. He most shocking thing is he doesn't want chocolate little Brocoli adores choc. He is taking sips of juice though.

brocoli Oh bless him... I guess its dvd's and falling asleep on couch covered up in blankets then? Poor thing.
My boat can be hired out deb but the price went up as soon as the rain started - I decided to do what the energy companies do and the minute something is in demand - hike up the price - the absolute and total robbing little feckers... (i'm kidding - vcf's get the boat for free!)
You may not be able to get heating monster but mine is not going on either after I watched the news this evening - Did you see the hike in cost price gas from 70p to 1.50 in an afternoon? I know there was a leak in a pipe and Uk has no reserves but I am only waiting for the letter that says, 'Regrettably, due to the one afternoon in March where prices hiked for about a few hours, we are going to have to pass this cost onto you, the customer for the next 12 months!'
You can try, Dear Energy People but you won't be seeing a penny out of me for it, I promise you - would rather be so cold my toes dropped off.

I have twisted my foot am hopping about like Tigger - no idea how I have done it but it hurts and I have a huge spot on my face and my kidney is playing up and I have melted crayon all over my kitchen table - the mess caused by 'an art project' - crayons, a hairdryer and a rather large piece of paer...
Youngest offspring has gone on an outdoor training activity with cadets - its pouring, windy and the mud is feet deep - she's in combats and has taken spare clothes and a towel - I am dreading the return of her at 9.30 with half a field of mud caked to her entire being!
x

Hello, thanks for your keeping warm tips. We have borrowed some electric heaters to see us through the weekend so its not quite as grim as it was earlier! I have a hot water bottle shoved up my jumper. One of our friends just called round and was very surprised to see me opening the door with a large bump so I had some explaining to do!

The cost of fuel is beyond a joke. We are having a chilly few days but there are plenty of poor souls who daren't put their heating on for fear of the costs. Life is a pretty expensive business these days.

Sorry to hear Brocoli jnr still isn't well. Awful though it is when either of mine is feeling under the weather, I find that the silver lining is that I get lots of cuddles.

Happy Saturday all!
Yeah monster has got heaters! To be fair, its not that cold down here, not like it has been anyhow, so my rant about not putting heating on and going cold was utterly uncalled for - compared to people who have the snow and those who can't put it on because they can't not because they want to make some stupid point about the cost of it all... Sorry... Thoughtless.

X

Hello just back from teaching my class and it was ace! I'm loving it! Finally found something I can do - has taken long enough.

I hope this weekend is better than last but somehow I doubt it.

I hope your little one is feeling better today Brocoli and that it is not so cold for you Monster.

threebats I forgot to say thank you. When I have the cash I will definitely like to be pampered and beautified by your daughter - can she work miracles?

Hey Threebats, that wasn't a dig about the heating and you are quite right to rant away.

Debstar thats great that your class went so well. Bet they enjoyed it too. If the weekend goes downhill remember that you have friends here who will listen.

Nurse Brocoli - hope the patient is feeling better today.

We are surviving the cold so far. The kids dont seem too bothered by it but I really feel the cold and am finding this difficult. We are going out shortly anyway. Monstergirl is having a birthday party (thankfully not in our house) so I am bracing myself for an afternoon of screeching hyperactive 6 yr olds. Will definitely need a few stiff drinks to calm me down this eve. (It's probably quite bad form to take a hip flask into a kids party isn't it?)

Anyone seen MillyMollyMandy? If you are reading this MMM, hope all is well, come back and chat with us

Happy birthday Monstergirl have a lovely party. Love the image of you stood in the corner sipping from a hipflask Monster

I hope Molly is ok. I was thinking about her earlier and would love her to come back on here and chat.

monster I knew you were not having a poke - I was however, thoughtless in what I said....
Deb Congratulations on the class - I think its great and second monster - you can come here and we are here, not all at the same time as that would be some freaky esp going down but we are here.
brocoli how is the patient?

And Molly I was thinking about you also the other day but thought about when I feel bad and go underground so I second monster - I hope you are okay.

Foot now in a bandage and I am in absolute bloody pain. No idea what I have done - can't take Ibuprofen as it hurts my kidneys so am suffering with second rate paracetamol... Not been to the pool

Thank you all little Brocoli is much better today. He has been making cakes with Daddy this afternoon although he didn't want to eat them so not quite a 100% yet. I know what you mean about the extra cuddles though I made the most of them yesterday when he sat on my knee all day. I think a hip flask might be a bit too naughty Monster best wait till you get home. Hope that foot is better soon Threebats

I'm hoping the snow clears tomorrow I think we are all going a bit stir crazy stuck in the house. Hope your all having a lovely weekend.

Hi

I'm new here and this group sounds interesting.....I'm still laughing over the toilet roll post ( no offence to the person) I have an iPad too! I'm a single mum to 3, 2 adults, and a 14 year old who has Asperger's syndrome. I'm in a relationship, but don't know if I should be in it or not.....look forward to getting to know some of you

Hello Lins welcome to the VCF . I am waiting to hear if my son is on the list to be assessed for Aspergers or if we are going to have to wait even longer!
Weekend is gradually going downhill. I don't ask for much but do expect to be spoken to nicely in my own home! I wouldn't tolerate this from my own!

Glad to hear little Brocoli is feeling better. Did you eat the cakes for him?
Rest that foot threebats or you'll be out of action much longer.
Monster I hope the party went well.

Welcome to the group Lins look forward to getting to know you. I have now devoured most of the cake Deb t'was very nice. Feeling very stuffed now. Sorry your having a rubbish weekend. Well DB phoned at 8am and told little Brocoli he was going to come round and build a snowman in the garden. Well despite numerous calls saying he would be round soon he didn't turn up. Little Brocoli has jumped up very excited every time a car has pulled up. Despite several attempts at distracting him he has been rather upset all day. He is only 2 so although he understands when someone says they will come round or take him out he can't understand why they don't then do what they say, so although it is in fact his uncle who is a grade A twat its me who looks like the bad guy . And breath sorry rant over.

Oh a new vcf! Welcome lins I have a 19 year old with Aspergers & High End Autism - you, Deb and I can all lament about how we walk past the young person, touch their shoulder absentmindedly then get the reaction of, you burned them with a hot poker, the face of death while you are told, 'I do not like it when you touch me...' Heartbreaking really. I want a cuddle - he wants to wrapped up in bubble wrap and never, ever touched... Sigh...
Foot in agony - no swelling, no bruising, can wiggle toes. But agony. Up at 5am this morning as could not sleep or get comfy through the pain. Spent yesterday evening with it elevated up the back of the couch, daughter put bag of frozen peas on it - I nearly shot through the roof - its cold enough thanks! Bag of frozen peas on foot when its flipping freezing anyhow - nutter. Made her get the cheesecake out of the fridge and fetch me a huge plate full as punishment
brocoli Sorry you have a brother who behaves in that way - some people are very thoughtless, did you get the snowman made in the end or not bother?
It was light this morning at 5.45 - guess it must be Spring - could somebody please inform the weather of this fact?
deb Can you get out at weekends? Go off and have a coffee somewhere? Just escape for an hour?
x

We gave it up as a bad job Threebats everything we suggested he wanted to do it with DB was a very frustrating day. Hope that foot is feeling better.

brocoli Making snowmen is over rated, particularly when you've no heating to come back indoors to. I bet you have had a miserable weekend, a broken boiler is miserable - Its the lack of hot water as well - its horrible. Here is hoping that gas man comes back with the part today and we hear later that you've been rolling about in a heated house in your bikini just because you can, snow outside and all!
Foot is marginally okay today, limping less like a 90 year old and more like a 60 year old... Less of a stoop to it!
deb How are you today?

Heat! We have heat! I could've snogged the engineer in joy. (I didn't, I promise). Deep, hot baths all round later this eve for the slightly grubby monsterfamily...

Monstergirl's birthday party went well, fun was had by all and no one ended up in casualty which is always a bonus. And I got through it without the aid of anything stronger than a cappucino.

Sorry to hear about your injury threebats. I had a similar thing myself a couple of months back so I can sympathise. Suggest you lie back on the sofa and ring a little bell when you need anything. Didn't work for me but you never know.

Hi Lins - welcome!

Brocoli and Debstar - I hope all is well with you

Right - I'm off to dig out my bikini and sip cocktails whilst I roll around in the warmth. However I will make sure I close the curtains first so the neighbours don't need therapy in later life

I agree completly Threebats building snowmen is completley overrated, I did however have heating. I think it was poor Monster who had the broken boiler [waves] at Monster. Glad the boiler is fixed and Monster girl had a good day.

Apologies brocoli.
As speculated last week, it seems the whisper today is that energy bills are to increase by 200.00 next year thanks to the cold weather snap now and the low reserves. One day, that's all it took for this huge increase to be bartered about by the energy companies - passing it onto the consumer while they continue on reaping in millions and millions of pounds in profit. I can't begin to even think how many people, myself included, will no longer be using central heating as a result of this. I have only had mine on for 3 hours per evening this winter - as I work from home but not to the point I pay tax - I have no allowance for heating in my expenses. I sit in a house below 0 degrees on a daily basis and work to being in pennies to support my kids through college and onto Uni.
I fully understand the difficulty with gas supply and rising cost because of that - I absolutely flat out can not stomach the huge profits these companies are raking in while people sit about, in 2013 - too cold to move, unable to heat a home and it being warmer outside than it is inside.
What I would like, is next winter, we force the politicians into having an energy allowance for the entire winter - only so much money to pay for their heat and hot water. For them and their families. Lets see how, by this time next year, they are justifying the cost then and how angry they are that they have watched their children freezing cold for months on end.

Hey vcf's....
This will be my last post on the forum.
It really is not the place for me.
I wanted to come back on here and say to you all, Deb, Monster, Brocoli and Molly - I wish you all the very best in life and its been lovely chatting with you the last few weeks.
Take care all.
x

Oh no I'm sad that you are going threebats your posts have been a highpoint of my day. I hope all is well with you and yours x

Really sorry to hear that Threebats will really miss you. Best of look with everything xx

Hi everyone. I'm having a bit of a mare at the moment. I'm in a bad mood, stressed over lack of money, problems with my kids and problems with my boyfriend's kids, sick of hearing how fantastic my brother and sister are too. Aaaaahhhhhhh I just wish life was easy sometimes.

And breathe.....

I hope you are all having good days

Sorry your having such a rubbish time Deb life really can be pooh sometimes can't it? I'm determined april will be a good month for me. I hope it will for you too.

Me too Brocoli

In fact, I'm going to make sure of it!!! I'm going to stop wallowing and get on and do something. I will go out when I'm feeling suffocated at home with other people's children instead of letting it get to me! And...I'm going to be proactive in getting more work.

I might need a virtual kick up the bum occasionally!

Well Deb I will virtually kick you up the bum if you do the same for me. I will get out the house more spent more "quality" time with my little family. Start my diet and most importantly I will make sure that incomings and outgoings balance this month.

Okay...mutual bum kicking it is

Well just picked up DS from playschool they had a photographer in the otherday and the pics are lovely there £30 though so will have to try and scrape that back from somwhere may have to ebay some of his old things. Probably a good reason to declutter.

He made a lovely easter basket too, some cowbag made a comment because he had picked a pink one and said she wouldn't have been happy and the staff should have told him to pick a differnt colour. WTF? He is 2 I don't give a shiny shite what bloody colour I'm just proud of the lovely basket he has made.

Oh photo's when they are little are so sweet! Now mine are teens they are the same as me when a camera is in the vicinity.

Next time the cowbag makes a comment just tell her real men can handle pink.

I love that reply Deb will remember that one. I hate photos of me DS on the other hand is a little poser.

Oh no, threebats has gone..
Hello Debstar and Brocoli. I like your positive thinking, hope all is well with you

Hi monster how are you? Continuing with the positive thinking here. Dp is on his way home from work now and not back till tue. I'm determined that we are going to have a lovely family weekend.

Hi Monster and Brocoli I hope you have fabulous weekends with your families.

I have a confession to make...

I have failed at the positive thinking. I am sat here dreading the whole weekend. I just want to hibernate.

Oh Deb here is a virtual kick up the bum from me. We are nearly half way through it now. End is in sight.

Thank you Brocoli
I'm out most of today luckily or I think I would cry.

Hello and Happy Easter to all. Its good that you are out and about Debstar, keeping busy helps me when I am having a bad spell. If all else fails then this weekend is the perfect excuse to stuff your face with chocolate. Brocoli, hope your DS has fun this weekend

Getting out was the best thing for me. It really helped. Thank you both for your kind words

Glad getting out helped Deb and hope the weekend improves for you. Thanks Monster he's had lots of fun so far although at a bit of a loss for what to do tomorrow. Hope you and mini monster are having a nice easter.

I know it sounds petty but I can't abide the noise. Constant fighting, screeching, shouting at each other, moaning cos they have lost the mission on their game. From 6.30am to 10.30pm. It hurts my head!!!!

I am ok though just a moaning minnie!

I hope you are all enjoying the chocolate fest today. I actually forgot to buy anything.

I'm sorry I've killed the thread with my self-indulgent twaddle!

Come back VCF!!

I'm here Deb it wasn't self indulgent twaddle sounded perfectly normal to me we all need a bit of me time sometimes. Sometimes children and there demands can just be relentless.

Yay bank holiday weekend is finally over. Back to some normality

Hope you are all well

Glad you survived the bankholiday Deb can't belive its the weekend again already. Where did the week go? Decided to be spontaneous today and take DS the local farm got to try and figure the route out as no idea how to get there wish me luck.

Back to work next week eek. How is every one?

I hope you got to the farm ok

I'm ok if a bit tired! I can't believe it's the weekend already either Brocoli it just appeared out of nowhere! I'm sure it was only Tuesday yesterday

I hope everyone is well and happy!

Where on earth has today gone? I'm sure I only got up a little while ago (7.30am) but it's already 4.51pm.

I hope you are all enjoying the sunshine!

Hello all. Its been a busy week which is why I haven't been posting but I am still here! Its so nice to finally have some half decent weather isn't it? Maybe the next week will enable a downgrade from the 'big winter coat' to something a bit lighter. I'm fed up of having to wear warm stuff and wrap the kids up in 10 layers of clothes everytime we venture outside. I have eaten a shocking amount of chocolate this week though (well it would be rude not to at Easter I guess) so the woolly jumpers are hiding the lumps and bumps at least. Hows everyone else?

The weather is great isn't it! I have actually managed to dry some clothes outside makes life so much easier.

I am hoping to remain in a positive mood. I might start writing three positive points of the day on here if you don't mind.

Today:
1 - had a lovely sleep and woke up feeling refreshed
2 - there were no arguments between children today
3 - remembered to order my boyfriend's eliquid as he has been asking me for a few days and I keep forgetting

How to be positive when I've spent the day with the d of d&v and my youngest has had the v.

Hmmmmm

1 - my boyfriend really does care. He kept texting to see how I was today.
2 - my eldest and I have had a good conversation today.
3 - I am feeling a lot better than I was this morning.

I hope the VCF are well

No one is coming on here anymore. I miss the VCF!

Been a busy week here was my first day back in work after nearly 5 months yesterday. I love that idea Deb I will pinch it and do the same tomorrow if you don't mind.

I don't mind at all Brocoli

My three positive points today are:

1 - I feel better today than I have all week.
2 - I sorted out what I need for the class I teach on Saturday morning.
3 - my youngest made a lovely cup of tea

sorry been a bit of a busy week here. Three positive points today:
1-Not needed as many pain killers today. Seem to be getting on top of it now.
2-Recived confirmation for a place on a course next week so I can start volunteering for home start.
3-Managed to send all the e-mails I needed to.

Positive points of today

1 - Yay I found the thread...it disappeared from my TIO list.
2 - School was back after two long weeks!
3 - I made a phone call I was dreading and it wasn't too bad.

Glad you found the thread Deb feeling quite positive this week positive points today are.
1.Attended first day of preparation course for voluntary work.
2.Save the dates arrived and we love them.
3.Managed to catch up with a friend.