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DH being controlling or am I over reacting?

(117 Posts)
Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:08:19

DH is going away to his mums for the weekend on Friday.
He is taking DD too and I am clear to stay here and have some time to myself (nice!)
HOWEVER. I just said to him I'd most likely go out with my friend sat as it was her birthday this week, and I'd probably take my 'spends' money out for that.

DH thinks I should wait and not spend it this weekend, and if I over spent he Would Not be bailing me out and not to drink too much as its so expensive.

I had up til this point been under the impression that we had equal rights to the money and that I was in fact an adult that could budget already!!

Gah! So annoyed, AIBU?

Hissy Wed 23-Jan-13 21:10:35

I don't think you are over-reacting. If you want to go out, go out!

How long has it been since you had a childfree going out evening?

kittybiscuits Wed 23-Jan-13 21:12:24

I would treat myself to extra cocktails on the basis of his comments, but then I'm a childish bugger! What's he really worried about?

ErikNorseman Wed 23-Jan-13 21:13:01

What is he, your dad???

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:14:27

It's not so much the going out its the money.

I've had child free time just after Christmas and all is fine on that front, I'm just so annoyed he would say on one hand to have child free time and on the other he thinks I shouldn't over down an don't forget I won't help out if you spend it all on drinks!

Like I'm a child!

AnyFucker Wed 23-Jan-13 21:14:28

"spends" ? hmm

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:14:59

Over spend that should say

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:15:37

Spends AF is our equal share of the leftover money

prettypolly1 Wed 23-Jan-13 21:15:47

What is your 'spends' money? Is it like an allowance he gives you?

AnyFucker Wed 23-Jan-13 21:17:34

Why does he think he can tell you how to use your "spends" ?

And why would you give it headroom ?

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:17:46

No allowance here just to clarify we both work and have equal access and an agreed amount we have each to spend on ourselves.

boodles Wed 23-Jan-13 21:18:08

Sounds to me he doesn't want you to go out this weekend. The whole point of you having 'spends' is so you can choose how to spend them!

Tell him you are an adult and will choose how to spend your own money.

AnyFucker Wed 23-Jan-13 21:18:10

Please call it something else. It makes you sound 12yo.

AuntieStella Wed 23-Jan-13 21:18:19

It would be controlling if he were telling you not to go, full stop. Or if he were telling you you could not spend your share of the family disposable income as you wish.

Telling you not to exceed your share of the disposable income does make him sound a bit of an arse, but it's a fair standpoint.

tribpot Wed 23-Jan-13 21:20:16

So it's your discretionary money to spend as you choose?

Note the words in this sentence: discretionary. Choose.

What does he mean, if you end up going over budget you'll have to start flogging the silver to pay him back? What happens if he over spends his discretionary money one month?

nefertarii Wed 23-Jan-13 21:20:20

Is there a history of you going out on the piss and spending loads and then expecting him to fund things out of his 'spends'?

If not tell him to jog on.

AnyFucker Wed 23-Jan-13 21:20:42

There is overt controlling behaviour and covert controlling behaviour

He is demonstrating the latter. I advise you to take not a jot of notice of it.

In fact, get smashed on Margaritas and get a tattoo while you are pissed.

I am not completely serious about the last sentence.

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:21:58

That's just it there isn't any history of me over spending at all!
He's just said he thinks my friend will talk me into clubbing which will be even more money blah blah blah, in tuning him out now as there's undertones in his voice I don't like the sound of.

AnyFucker Wed 23-Jan-13 21:26:52

He objects to you goi g to a club ?

Does he think your friend will lead you astray and you will accidentally fall onto some other bloke's tackle ?

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:30:51

I think it's the money more than the club AF, we have been totally fine with our arrangement, but tonight he seems to be dying to know exactly what I'm going to spend and when am I going to be spending it.
Questions like what club, how much is it to get in, I'll just look it up online, are you going to do rounds or wine, it's like an interview.

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 21:31:48

Sounds like he's being an arse and not wanting you to enjoy yourself whilst he has the kids therefore using some other form of control.

Tell him to bugger right off.

AnyFucker Wed 23-Jan-13 21:32:36

I disagree.

I think it's you going to a club.

How much "spends" are we talking about, btw.

If "spends" is a fiver, he might have a point.

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 21:33:20

Posted that before your last post. I'd be wondering what he's been up to lately to be honest, why the spanish inquisition all of a sudden?

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:36:11

I will call it something else AF I just don't want to use spending money as that sounds odd to me, what should I use instead?

It's my friends birthday so I will be going where she wants to, I think it's annoying him that I haven't got a firm itinerary with times, taxis boomed and full budget spreadsheet.

Knob.

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 21:38:36

You have to have a "firm itintery" OP, really?

He definitely thinks he's in charge of you huh.

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 21:40:35

itinerary of course. I was angry on your behalf there!

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:42:18

I'm so annoyed because I've never seen anything like this coming.

Just thought convo was going to go
Me I'm going out sat
Him have fun (like he usually does)

Bizarre and wondered if this is how these things start?
May have spent too much time MN but its good to be informed?!

AnyFucker Wed 23-Jan-13 21:43:59

People with a guilty conscience can suddenly start seeing potential problems in something their partner is doing.

It's called projection

Any more changes in his behaviour recently ?

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 21:45:15

Not sure how things start op to be honest and spending time on MN if in a happy uncontolling relationship is a plus not a minus.

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:45:17

Not that I have noticed, Hhmm, thanks AF may well keep eyes peeled and in the meantime have extra cocktails this weekend!

AnyFucker Wed 23-Jan-13 21:47:17

Good. Whatever the explanation for his behaviour, I think the main thing is you do not take any notice of his attempts to tell you what to do.

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:49:30

I might pass on the tattoo tho!

<eyes up piercing website>

fuckadoodlepoopoo Wed 23-Jan-13 21:50:43

That's rather strange behaviour (his not yours).

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 21:53:04

If you wanted a tatoo or peircings they would be ok too.

ivykaty44 Wed 23-Jan-13 21:53:14

ewk I wouldn't want to sleep with a bossy boots, sort of dampens the passion if they start telling you how and what to do sad with your money etc.

How is your sex life?

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 21:55:43

Forgive me but what on earth has her sex life got to do with this ivy? Hows yours?

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 21:56:57

Up til tonight absolutely fine!
I think it's jealousy that I've free time and its sinking in that he won't be here, I dot know really I'm rambling now!

Everything else is fine but this convo tonight has really
Got my back up and I'm really pissed off he's even asked so many questions about my plans for my money

It is joint money and we just don't question each others ability to budget and have trust about it!

izzyizin Wed 23-Jan-13 21:59:11

It would seem it's his dick bubble that needs piercing.

As for the tramp stamp tattoo, may I suggest I do what I do am what I am & it you can't handle it, fuck off?

Numberlock Wed 23-Jan-13 22:00:04

Christ, I feel exhausted just reading about this twat. Thank fuck I can spend my 'spends' on whatever I like without having to submit a budget proposal in advance.

What are the undertones in his voice I don't like the sound of?

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 22:02:51

The irritation when I don't know what things cost it's as if I am deliberately keeping information from him!
Just as an undertone. You know when you hear a tone in someone's voice that's not obvious? That was what I meant.
I can't work out whether he's just a knob tonight and annoye about my free time and trying to make me feel guilty, or f it's a control 'red flag'

Bogeyface Wed 23-Jan-13 22:08:32

I wonder if its more to do with the fact that since you mentioned your friends birthday he is jealous that he will be at home with the DC and you will be out living it large. You will be able to get smashed and have a lie in and he wont. So he is trying to put you off going by being a dick.

Ignore.

TheFallenNinja Wed 23-Jan-13 22:09:06

He doesn't have something surprise planned does he?

Bogeyface Wed 23-Jan-13 22:09:29

And I do wonder if there is something in the "accidentally falling onto another mans penis" in it too. I bet if you asked him he would say that he trusts you but doesnt trust other men.........I wonder why.....

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 22:12:23

He's a classic "I'm king of the castle" knob and you're sort of getting to know that. If this is the first instance then I'd advise you to stamp it right out right now!

tribpot Wed 23-Jan-13 22:15:17

Can't you say what you've said here, "it sounds like you're interviewing me about my weekend. Why on earth do I have to have plans set in stone?" - and see what he says?

Numberlock Wed 23-Jan-13 22:16:14

It's definitely a trust thing, masked as financial concern about the household budget. Hence him only getting funny when the night out was mentioned. I doubt he'd have been asking for a financial forecast if you'd said you were planning to use your 'spends' on a couple of home improvement projects while he's away.

How often are you at home alone when he's at his mum's?

prozacbear Wed 23-Jan-13 22:17:41

Sounds like he's jealous. In a prepubescent sort of way.

Don't ignore! Call him on it. And make it clear you'll be going on your itinerary-less night out, with an undisclosed amount of money, and you will be sure not to slip and fall onto another man once you're ridiculously drunk. Obvs.

deleted203 Wed 23-Jan-13 22:18:04

He sounds a bit of a prat - but the bit about 'If you overspent he would not be bailing you out' makes me wonder if you have a history of this? Obviously if you don't then he's being a bit of a knob. But if you regularly overspend whatever 'your' share of the leftover money is and start dipping into his I can see why he'd sound a bit tight lipped over your plans to go out with a friend.

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 22:22:13

I think this does need nipping in the bud rather than let it drift.

He goes to his mums once every 3 months or so for a weekend.

What he done during this time hasn't been mentioned before.

I've no history of overspending.

I think I need to go and ca him on it and gauge reaction.

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 22:30:54

His reaction is not important. You making a stand regardless of his ways is what counts. He will use another tact. Just tell him he's an arse and you won't be dictated to.

Numberlock Wed 23-Jan-13 22:34:21

Is this the first time you've been out with friends while he's at his mum's?

Flumpyflumps Wed 23-Jan-13 22:36:38

He looked a bit scared when I said it was not up to
Me where we are going Saturday its not my birthday do and I've got an undisclosed budget and he needs to back off!

Mumbled about making conversation to which I 'hhmmmmm' d a lot and that was that!
Thanks clipped, think that's shut him up!

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 22:38:48

Good. Repeat as necessary. grin

tribpot Wed 23-Jan-13 22:43:19

Good. A bit of friendly concern to make sure you've remembered to pre-book a taxi rather than hang around in the cold for one on Saturday night is a good thing, but a full-scale Inquisition into your precise movements, budget and intentions is quite another.

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 22:46:10

Pre-book a taxi? I've never done that in my life because if i go out with friends who knows where the night may take me.

Don't pre-book a taxi OP. Go with the flow.

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 22:48:29

Pre booking a taxi smacks of having to be home at a certain time, sod that!

tribpot Wed 23-Jan-13 22:48:58

I was thinking if the clubs all chuck out at the same kind of time it'd be nice to beat the queues, esp in this weather!

ConfuzzledMummy Wed 23-Jan-13 22:50:27

You have "spends"? Tell him to piss off and spend your money how you like! To answer your question yes he is being controlling, do you tell him how to spend his money?

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 22:51:25

If that's what the OP and her friends decide to do then great, if it's what her partner decideds she should do then it's not bloody ok!

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 22:52:01

desides!

Got mad there for a mo.

tribpot Wed 23-Jan-13 23:00:00

Absolutely, Clipped - if he had been making a casually useful reminder of something she might want to consider that is vastly different from the split-second itinerary with GPS co-ordinates provided along with budget estimates to 10 decimal places. I think he may have thought he was doing the former whilst he was actually quite firmly in the latter category.

Shelby2010 Wed 23-Jan-13 23:24:45

Personally, I think you were just over thinking it... He realised he was spending the night at his Mum's while you would be out on the town, got a bit jealous & made some grumpy comments. Suddenly he's controlling & you're over-reacting. Surely better to have treated it as a joke & promise to keep enough money back for a taxi home.

Unless he is actually controlling & abusive, in which case use the weekend to LTB.

ClippedPhoenix Wed 23-Jan-13 23:35:16

Jealous and grumpy is a joke, ok then. It does tend to become less funny when jealous and grumpy is allowed and appeasing this behaviour becomes a grating and eroding thing on a relationship.

Shelby2010 Thu 24-Jan-13 00:06:22

I didn't say appease - I said (meant) ignore. He's the one looking after their daughter for the weekend, while the OP stays at home. I can't see that happening if he was particularly controlling - he'd be sending her to MIL while he went out in the piss.

Lueji Thu 24-Jan-13 06:07:41

Are you sure all is well with his job?

TotallyBS Thu 24-Jan-13 07:06:58

"we have been totally fine with our arrangement"

This suggests that your DP has no history of being an arse about money so why come onto aibu and give the Sisterhood of Dump the Bastard free shots at the poor guy?

AnyFucker Thu 24-Jan-13 07:38:22

"the arrangement" was that leftover money is divided between them

Not that he tells her precisely how to spend it, or rather how to behave with it

Flumpyflumps Thu 24-Jan-13 07:44:43

He's actually got up this morning and said sorry about getting so uptight about the money.

I sai what's brought this on as no issues before this weekend he said e was jealous.

Can't articulate why as we have a very equal split of free time and an equal split of money.

Went round in circles with me asking what he thought would happen and him saying I don't know.

tribpot Thu 24-Jan-13 07:58:46

Is this the first time he's looked after your dd for the weekend? (Although 'looked after' is a strong term given he is going to stay at her grandma's house)

Lueji Thu 24-Jan-13 08:00:22

TotallyBS, this is not AIBU...

Startail Thu 24-Jan-13 08:14:50

Tell him to fuck off it's non of his business how you spend, your share of spare money.

It's fine to agree how much is spare, but then the other partner should butt out.

DH and I are lucky he earns enough that sensible personal spending doesn't cause a problem and we don't check up on each other very much. I moan about too many EBay boxes occasionally, but only very gently.

My DDad is hopeless with money, so DMum always gave him "pocket money" when things were tight. She accepted it would be spent on all sorts of junk.

MumOfMissy Thu 24-Jan-13 08:20:13

What a tit. I'd wind him up and tell him you went to Mahikis and bought one of those treasure chest cocktails for £150. Seriously though, how much does he spend when HE goes on a night out? ask him, then spend at least the same. If it's a paltry sum, spend what you like then economise by giving him beans on toast for dinner till the end of the month.

I'm actually beginning to feel sorry for the bloke. From what I understand OP has and equitable arrangement where any disposable income is split equally and spent as wanted. However, in this one instance her DH has a bit of a strop on and gets arsey about it. He then apologises.

Sounds like a case of the green eye monster, not controlling abusive behaviour. In all likelihood he wants to go out on the tiles with his mates and have a booze up rather than child mind too, and is a bit jealous, so has a bit of a nag. He then wakes up and in the cold light of day accepts he was out of line. Sounds like a million and one little domestic spats acted out in every house in the country, not a LTB situation.

And AF why can't OP use the word 'spends'? It's what she calls spending money. It might not be what you call it, but so what.

Whocansay Thu 24-Jan-13 08:25:48

Not read all the replies, so apologies if this has already been said!

We also have a monthly 'allowance' after bills / savings that we BOTH stick to. I am the one who generally finds herself 'short'. If I have a big night out planned, I take the money out in cash, put the money that I need for the rest of the month aside and take the rest out. And I leave my card at home. That way, I can have a good time, but know what I have to spend and I've set myself a limit.

This works for me. I would suggest you go out and have a fabulous time. Just don't go over budget or it sounds as if your fella will never let you hear the end of it! Tbh it also sounds as if he's a bit jealous of your night out.

Numberlock Thu 24-Jan-13 08:54:42

Mahikis and bought one of those treasure chest cocktails for £150

Woah, how have I managed to be alive for 45 years and not know about this, mumofmissy? Pray enlighten me!

TotallyBS Thu 24-Jan-13 09:10:54

Lueji - the OP finished with a AIBU? so although I put down the wrong forum name, my point stands.

It constantly amazes me how some women take some minor marital event, post it on MN and then sit back and listen to a bunch of damaged women call her DP a twat, cunt and the like.

My DP on occasions has been some of the above but I certainly would not throw those labels at DP either directly or stand for others to do likewise.

Anniegetyourgun Thu 24-Jan-13 09:41:42

Um, I think what pretty much everyone said was that the behaviour was not acceptable, after ascertaining that the OP is not a wild spendthrift. It appears not to be part of a pattern, the OP has called him on it, he has apologised. I know one person said LTB but she quite clearly said only if there was a lot more to his controlling behaviour than this one incident - and with tongue in cheek if I read it correctly. In fact the main consensus seems to have been that he's jealous over DW having a nice weekend away with her mates while he's at mum's with the kids. And indeed, the DH himself has said so.

But of course, your name is TotallyBS so dredging up imaginary insults is only to be expected.

SweetSeraphim Thu 24-Jan-13 09:46:01

Ah well, at least he's apologised. Glad you called him on it. I know I'm generalising a bit, but I think that a lot of men will try this kind of shit now and again to see of they can get away with it, and be 'in charge' hmm

Anniegetyourgun Thu 24-Jan-13 09:48:11

Let me add, though, it is quite scary how often a minor marital event someone's complained about on here has turned out to be the wee tip of a fuck-off great iceberg. Hence it makes sense to look past the presenting issue, as they used to say in CAB training. In this case, fortunately, it appears the presenting issue is the issue, and easily solved by the OP telling her H not to be an arse. I'm sure we're all very glad of it.

Flumpyflumps Thu 24-Jan-13 09:49:08

Thanks for all your replies.
I'm fairly sure now that, as Sweet says, he was just trying it on, I nipped it in the bud and all will be fine.
Sorry I think I did over react by posting but just wanted to get a second opinion.
Just off to research those £150 cocktails!!

SweetSeraphim Thu 24-Jan-13 09:50:01

<likes> Flumpy's post grin

pictish Thu 24-Jan-13 09:52:04

He apologised, but yet still found a way to make you feel guilty about it.
"I'm jealous"
"Why?"
"I don't know"
"Fuck off then"

I think is the correct response.

bringmeroses Thu 24-Jan-13 09:54:40

Sweet seraphim is bang on the money, they like to be the boss, I'm sure it's genetic glad he's seen sense. I like the term spends btw. Enjoy your night out.

bringmeroses Thu 24-Jan-13 09:59:51

Pictish I admire your hard line stance but I think OP is better off being tolerant of his attitude, in his shoes I'd be a bit jealous too and not begrudge OP a good time but i would want her to know how I felt, as a friend.

SweetSeraphim Thu 24-Jan-13 10:03:08

They can fuck right off 'being the boss' as far as I'm concerned bringmeroses

I fucking HATE being told what to do, and when it comes from a man, it just makes my hackles rise, and I always completely overreact.

pictish Thu 24-Jan-13 10:03:38

Yes...except he didn't just let her know 'as a friend' - he made a point of quizzing her and pretty much trying to influence how she spent her time and money, didn't he?

Who cares if he's jealous? So what? That's no excuse, and being jealous is pathetic anyway. Aw diddums.

He is making his issue her issue, and as such can do one, no?

pictish Thu 24-Jan-13 10:04:52

I have no tolerance for that sort of crap. Thankfully.

If you do, more fool you.

SweetSeraphim Thu 24-Jan-13 10:08:50

<Yes...except he didn't just let her know 'as a friend'>

Exactly. He let her know as The Boss, because that's who he thinks he is.... they all do hmm

Well they can get to fuck.

Oooh, men are pissing me off today. Can you tell grin

Flumpyflumps Thu 24-Jan-13 10:11:46

I can tell Sweet!
He's under no illusion that I will be doing my own thing all weekend once I've finished work Friday eve (note to self may be late for drunk thread!) and that our free time and money is split equally.

I've shown him this thread and he now feels a right knob for even commenting at all.

pictish Thu 24-Jan-13 10:13:15

Friends don't make other friends feel bad about having a nice time anyway. Unless they're an emotionally manipulative tossbag.

bringmeroses Thu 24-Jan-13 10:17:23

Aww I am fond of men. I think the telling you what to do thing is kind of endearing, you don't have to take it seriously!
Polish I am a bit old fashioned, I believe in tolerance and compassion, I honestly don't know how people stay together without it. It works both ways.

pictish Thu 24-Jan-13 10:18:15

There are no words.... shock

bringmeroses Thu 24-Jan-13 10:20:30

Sorry I mean Pictish. I agree about emotional manipulation but OP has called him on this and he's seen error of his ways. We will save them from themselves with MN grin

pictish Thu 24-Jan-13 10:30:45

Ok sounds good! grin

SweetSeraphim Thu 24-Jan-13 10:45:20

bringmeroses...endearing?? hmm Not on my watch!

Numberlock Thu 24-Jan-13 10:49:15

they like to be the boss, I'm sure it's genetic

What a load of sexist shite.

bringmeroses Thu 24-Jan-13 10:52:17

In about ten days I'll have pmt, at which point I will smack myself on the head for the simpering crap I've just posted and encourage anyone who asks to leave the bastard!!! grin

HighBrows Thu 24-Jan-13 10:53:21

a bunch of damaged women on here... I think not. An incident like this can be a turning point in a relationship if not handled properly. I'm glad Flumpy called her dh on this and it's all sorted now.

Enjoy your night out Flumpy.

bringmeroses Thu 24-Jan-13 10:53:30

Numberlock I'm being a bit tongue in cheek. Didn't mean to offend.

pictish Thu 24-Jan-13 10:58:38

Yeah...I think it's one of those occasions when intonation is everything. I think bringmeroses was being deliberately condescending towards men in her posts there...

Like a pat on the head "there there silly man, playing at being in charge" sort of a thing?

I didn't get it at first...but then I did. grin

Flumpyflumps Thu 24-Jan-13 11:12:10

I guess I wanted a second opinion because I've seen threads on here in which things turn out to be worse than they seem iyswim?
And wanted to ask if this was something that could develop into a more controlling attitude.

I think as I've nipped it in the bud it will be fine and I know that people have much worse situations to be thinking of.

Anniegetyourgun Thu 24-Jan-13 11:20:18

Fair enough. Fortunately these boards are not reserved for doom and gloom scenarios. Minor irritations, queries, theoretical discussions, boasting, all perfectly valid reasons to post. If people don't think it's worth replying to they don't have to.

fuckadoodlepoopoo Thu 24-Jan-13 11:26:35

I agree with worsestershiresauce

Sounds like he was just having a "moment". I had a bit of one last week when my dh wanted to go out on his own to the cinema. I was fine with him going but for some reason didn't want him going during the day as it meant i'd be on my own with my lovely dcs, i suggested he went in the evening instead so it didn't affect me, well only in that i would got the house to myself in the evening! I then realised i was being a twat and told him so.

Also the fuss over "spends" is ridiculous! hmm The twatty things that people slag off on here are pathetic. Call it what you want op.

examiner99 Thu 24-Jan-13 11:29:45

I really like the term 'spends' and will be using it from now on.

pictish Thu 24-Jan-13 11:30:37

I say 'spends' too. Anyone who doesn't like it can write 'spends' on a piece of paper, then roll it up and insert it in their anus. For all I care.

fuckadoodlepoopoo Thu 24-Jan-13 11:36:44

Pictish grin

Im going to be using that at the next opportunity!

pictish Thu 24-Jan-13 12:11:05

grin

Lueji Thu 24-Jan-13 12:15:39

FWIW, he could be a controlling git, who will keep trying it.

Nothing wrong with keeping alert to these attitudes.

But we all have a right to our moments of weakness. smile

Does he normally take DD with him to his mum?

MumOfMissy Thu 24-Jan-13 13:10:16

Note for OP and Numberlock: the treasure chest cocktail is Prince Williams favourite and is served at Mahiki for £135. Although Aldi have created their own version for £25.80. Called the Aldiki! smile

Numberlock Thu 24-Jan-13 13:12:49

So is it just one single cocktail? Or a jug? Or what?

MumOfMissy Thu 24-Jan-13 13:23:40

Apparently it's served in a big wooden treasure chest and you all stick a straw in and share, yah? The Aldiki version contains "an exotic mix of rum, brandy, peach schnapps and fruit juice... topped off with a celebratory bottle of sparkling wine". Presumably you just drink theirs out of a bucket...

Anniegetyourgun Thu 24-Jan-13 13:39:05

Sounds splendid. But what is this "share"?

MumOfMissy Thu 24-Jan-13 13:54:15

I like your style! grin

AboutThyme Thu 24-Jan-13 14:55:44

Popping up from lurking just to say...The awesome Aldiki

ivykaty44 Thu 24-Jan-13 14:59:19

ClippedPhoenix - very good ta, but I don't live with a control freak otherwise mine would be shiit

Numberlock Thu 24-Jan-13 15:19:14

Thanks About, that's real public service information broadcasting!

MumOfMissy Thu 24-Jan-13 18:00:55

Love the way after you've filled a chest full of enough alcohol for 16 people it says "please drink responsibly"! wine

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