I dont have a mother inlaw from hell but she does try to take over whatever the situation might be, and likes to always have her own way. DH and me had a baby boy 5wks ago and as I had a pretty awful pregnancy and then had a week of being induced we decided we would have the first week by ourselves. I had suffered with spd and was not very mobile, I could not even stand up and hold my ds in my arms and wanted to have some recovery time. Well, mil was not happy and was putting us under pressure to visit us sooner, but we stood firm. The day I came out of hospital we bumped into her and fil as we picked up a prescription on the way home so they did see their 1st granchild all be it only half an hour.
when they did visit us ds was crying alot as he had acid reflux so I soothed him as did dh, as soon as I left the room mil took ds from dh, I could not even look at her. I took ds upstairs to bed and soothed him for 2 hours til he slept through exhaustion.
We visited mil and fil one afternoon and as we were getting ds out of the car mil was trying to move me out of the way, needless to say I did not move, and because of acid reflux he was being sick so I sat down to settle him and clean him and mil was about to take him off me til I said that I was going to do this as other wise he would not settle down. Once he was ok I gave ds to mil for a cuddle, and I was then in the background for the rest of the time we were there.
the day before my birthday mil suggested visiting us to give me my card (this has not happened before) but we had plans to visit my mum that evening and my brother would also be there so said we would sort another day out. DH had to go and look at a job with his brother so he dropped me off at my mums and within five minutes mil and fil turned up!!! I was not happy as I thought it a bit rude to turn up unanounced, so I sat with my mum, fed ds, and when dh came back got ready to go home......its like mil didnt want to miss out on anything.
A few days later she asked if we wanted to go over to her place when it is dh birthday.....again this has never happened, dh said that we were going out for a meal.....and it would be just the three of us.
The more she pushes herself on us the more I will just move back a step, since she kicked up such a fuss when I came out of hospital that has made me feel just a little bit cheesed off as she was being selfish and not thinking of dh and me. I dont want to push her away as I loved my nan and always looked forward to seeing her and getting cuddles and I would like that for ds. My family are really easy going but mil is not, and so I find this hard to cope with......we have already had to sort out what we want to do for christmas as I am sure she will expect us to be there.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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Relationships
mother in law only interested in new baby.......
littlelion · 11/08/2005 11:13
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