what is wrong with me?

[wonderif]

lately i have been feeling low and i take it out on my husband

i feel like i do everything christmas has been organised by me not help at all the house is getting on top of me and i get no help, he doesnt understand that i am so tired and would just like someone to get stuck in and help, i know i sound like a moaning bitch but i just need some help.

christmas isnt a particulary happy time due to losing 2 family members last year and this year.

any advice please

[TheFoosa]

you sound weary

do you tell him though? My dp will not realise what needs doing unless I give him a bullet-point list

[TheFoosa]

sorry about your losses, that can make Christmas especially hard

[missingtheaction]

I hate the word 'help' when it comes to household stuff. It says 'I know this is my job but I would like you to be generous and give me a little help because I can't manage on my own'.

What should be being said is 'We are both adults in a partnership. Christmas is a joint responsibility. Pull your weight'. Then give him a short list of what his jobs are.

Clearly nobody is going to do anything until asked. Could you give him some specific jobs to do?

Or do you think you would normally do all this happily and really ought to see your GP?

[wonderif]

i do feel weary , dont get me wrong is a gread dad and she we have a child with sn so its hard too.

i work also and instead of rationally saying this needs done etc we end u rowing, even small things like cleaning the cat litter and load dishwasher (which he used to do)
would help.

maybe i am wrong and my mood is low yes maybe i should see gp but to be honest i dont want to go down that route i had to when i lost my family and i weaned of the a d's after about 3 months.

i am going to go and have a soak as have a very sore bath and hopefully i will de stress a bit so i can have a civil conversation !

thanks

[TheFoosa]

might be worth a chat with the gp though, even if just to offload?

enjoy your bath

[TheFoosa]

no, it shouldn't be help but if your partners are anything like mine then they need it spelling out in minute detail

[lilacclaire]

Just keep your cool and say in a normal tone, can you get the litter tray, dishwasher etc.
I know its annoying that you need to ask at all, but after 6 months of therapy I discovered the lazy bums don't mind read!
Ask, ask, ask (in a normal voice, not the pissed off one).