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Relationships

So dp says those words that I have been dreading 'We need to talk'

141 replies

squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 18:20

Then he carries on 'But it will have to be next week because I am 'busy' now! WTF!!!!

I am so blooming angry I can't begin to describe how angry!

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 18:22

What makes it worse is I sent him a really 'mushy' romantic card yesterday (which will probably arrive Monday now!)

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MaggieBruja · 24/10/2009 18:23

How's he been lately? non-communicative, evasive, snappy??

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 18:34

Yes, I have been asking him what is wrong for weeks now but he has just said "I'm tired that's all darling".

Why the hell has he told me we need to talk when he 'cant' talk? Unbelievably cruel if you ask me.

What is it about a seemingly inteligent woman that makes her go 'ga ga' over a man that promises her the world and she believes it even when he breaks most of the promises he made to her?

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 18:44

I know I am better off without him so why am I crying my eyes out like a love sick teenager?

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ShowOfHands · 24/10/2009 18:45

Do you know it's something bad. Ask him to tell you what the feck it is he wants to talk about.

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MuthaHubbard · 24/10/2009 18:47

are you going out with my xp??

that's exactly how he acted for about a month and a half before we split! he also said all the right things and made me fall head over heels (aka ga ga)

why can't he talk? how can he be so busy that he can't spare a half hour phone call?

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 18:52

He says he feels we have drifted apart, that's all he will actually say but its obvious isn't it? We all know the next line is going to be "Its not you, its me..."

He can't understand why I am angry, why I need to know now. When I told him that I thought he was being cruel by not telling me everything he just said "Whatever".

Whatever! Whatever? We have been together for 2 years! Surely I deserve more than that?

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ShowOfHands · 24/10/2009 18:55

Of course you deserve more than that. Does he want to sit down to try and sort out what he perceives as problems and to continue with the relationship? If so, then in some ways that's commendable but if it's just a formal date to finish it then that's utterly cruel.

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 18:55

He says he can't talk because he has his daughter overnight but she goes to bed at 7pm so I don't understand why he won't talk to me this evening.

Think it is because he is a spineless twat who can't face telling me it is over...

Oh, btw did I mention that all of this has been by text message!!

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FABIsInTraining · 24/10/2009 18:59

Why not send your own text message saying he clearly wants to finish so Goodbye.

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 19:00

Sorry, I have been so angry I havent thanked you for your replies.

Thank you

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 19:04

FABIsInTraining, well I have asked him to post my stuff to me (its a long distance relationship... I know, I know, I should know better, but he did promise me the world and I believed him like an idiot)

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Hassled · 24/10/2009 19:05

I would text him saying that you need to talk, you need to talk now this minute, and what you want to say is that you can't stand being messed around any longer and so thank you but goodbye. Really, salvage what dignity you can - you sound like you deserve a lot better.

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slimeoncrazydemon · 24/10/2009 19:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 19:10

Already done Hassled, but got a negative response "No, I won't get a chance to talk until next week".

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Hassled · 24/10/2009 19:17

He really is pissing you around completely - when you talk isn't exclusively down to him. Dump him before he dumps you - he's just stringing it out.

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 19:17

slimeoncrazydemon the way I feel right now is, I am not going to get in touch with him at all (why should I?) I think it is over so it is over. Also if I do talk to him now I fear I may cry and lose all self respect and beg him to sort things out with me (like an idiot).

This way he has to get in touch with me if he actually wants to sort things out, if he doesn't he will post my stuff to me and let that be the end of it.

At least I won't have to worry about bumping into him, I'll just have to delete him from Facebook, lol.

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 19:19

Exactly Hassled, think you are right!

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SolidGhoulBrass · 24/10/2009 19:19

Oh bloody hell, just dump him. He's obviously Just Not That INto You, so why prolong the agony? Text him and say, look, it's obviously not working, please send my stuff back, goodbye and good luck.

(If there is anything worth salvaging, that will have him suddenly finding time to talk. If he says, thanks, Ok, bye, at least you know and can start recovering straight away)

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 19:22

Why do we fall for them? Men that promise the world, tell us they want to be by our side for the rest our their lives, propose, tell us they have never felt this way etc.

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slimeoncrazydemon · 24/10/2009 19:26

This reply has been deleted

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 19:29

SolidGhoulBrass already done (well I have asked him to post my stuff to me).

Its just I feel like a prize fool for getting taken in by him and yes, I did fall for him so there are feelings involved. Walking away with my head held high is something I am trying to do but because feelings are involved I am failing.

But... I am a strong woman, I will get past it, I am not going to let a man ruin my life! Ok, so it may hurt for a while but time heals and I will come out fighting - watch this space

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 19:32

slimeoncrazydemon, I would have thought I had have learnt that lesson many, many years ago. Believe me I don't trust easily and I am old enough to know better, but I still fell for him.

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MaggieBruja · 24/10/2009 20:12

good for you squirrel... And if he does dump you, save the tears for MN.. Tell him with a shrug, "ok, you weren't really meeting any of my needs; emotional, intellectual....... sexual" .

Then come back here and thrash it out. He'll be slightly less cocky on his release into captivity then.

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squirrel3 · 24/10/2009 20:17

MaggieBruja PMSL, you know it, lol.

Have I mentioned his very small....

...

...

...

erm...

...

bathroom... now you thought I was going to say something else didn't you?

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