My MIL is not a bad old stick really - she vehemently opposed us being together (used to leave him poisonous notes calling me a harlot and saying my History degree was worthless as only total dropkicks do humanities) DH's relationship with her has been thorny to say the least - she led him a bit of a dog's life as a kid and he was very cowed by her when I met him
but over the past years we have reached an amicable stasis and I am actually quite fond of her now
BUT - she is very starry-eyed about ds1's academic abilities (he has Aspergers and splinter skills - in many ways he is more typical of a 3yo and a 6yo but he recently passed year 6 science SATS papers and reads adult books etc)
this rings alarm bells for us as she basically chained dh to his desk from the age of 7 - no friends, no parties, no school trips, just endless test papers (she used to steal them and make him do them over and over again), Latin and German vocab tapes, maths workbooks - constant pushing and dh was very lonely and miserable.
DS2 is 4 and doesn't have Aspergers, he's a bright all-round lovely child, talkative, inquisitive anbd delightful, but has a bit of a chip on his little shoulder because all he ever hears about at school is his 'weird' brother
this morning I found a parcel on the doormat from MIL, addressed to ds1 - it's a set of train timetables (he adores trains) from her holiday abroad, and a text book from a trip to a museum with the school she works at. With lovely notes attached telling ds1 what they are and where they came from. Nothing for ds2.
AIBU to take the notes off, throw the packaging away and tell the boys she sent them for both of them?
I don't want to say anything to her because she has done a really nice thing in sending them and if I say something, she will fell hurt and as though she can't get anything right!
BUT I felt a real kick in the guts on behalf of my gorgeous ds2, who is also bright and fascinated by the world, who also loves trains and also would have got something out of the book.
Advice please!
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Relationships
MN diplomacy required regarding tricky MIL issue
Greensleeves · 12/06/2009 09:27
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