AIBU? Would quite like to murder DH by cutting his bollocks off

[homicidalmatriach]

Okay here's the story, several children, each one with a more horrible pregnancy than the last, lots of complications, caesarians, continuous vomiting during pregnancy.

I am not sure whether I want another baby after all that but DH decided 'enough is enough' and has refused to have sex with me for a year in case I get pregnant.

I suggested he had the snip and he refuses because I might die and he might want to make a baby with someone new .

He thinks this is perfectly reasonable. I've pointed out he'd have two kids still even if I did kick the proverbial bucket. Also unless it happens very soon he'll be too fecking old!

But he still refuses to even consider it. Now I am breastfeeding and over 35 so not a good candidate for the pill, GP says the coil won't be a good choice for me (very heavy periods already and apparently my cervix is in the wrong place ).

Is he just being a shit or am I missing something?

[Hobnobfanatic]

He's being a selfish shit! Contraception should be shared, and since you're not a suitable candidate, he should do it! Refusing sex for a year! Who is he kidding?! What a sod!

And how reassuring to know that he's planning what he'll do if you cark it! What a charmer!

Seriously, I think men can be very protective of their bits, somehow linking it with a loss of 'manliness'. but loads of men have the snip and the op can be reversed - just in case you do die!

[homicidalmatriach]

Thank you! I thought so too - I've had four bloody major surgeries to have these kids after all - it's his turn.

[AnyFucker]

yep, its his turn

[BlueAeroplane]

What happens after a year?

[LoveMyGirls]

His turn but also his choice (I don't make the rules, if I did my dp would be having the snip too)

How long has his ban been so far? Cus I'm betting you can win this.......

[PenelopePitstops]

can you not just use condoms?

[quint]

What a prick!

Do you really think he'd last a year without sex?

[TheFallenMadonna]

I have every sympathy with men being protective over their bits. Well, not DH - I'm fed up with waiting for him to make an appointment and his excuses are pitiful, but anyway...

But I just don't get your DH's POV. What's special about a year's time? Or is the no sex thing going to be revisited until you stop ovulating?

[PortofinoLovesItUpTheOxoTower]

You have my sympathies. My DH is 51, adamant that he wants no more babies, but still won't go there. He says he wants to stay fertile in case he is called upon the repopulate the world in the event of a nuclear attack. [Hmm] Arse.

[homicidalmatriach]

Well after a year is now. Actually 13 months now

I think he thinks if he ignores the issue it doesn't exist!

[Boco]

Lots of men very weird about their bollocks aren't they. I have several friends whose dps won't consider it in a weirdy male pride way. He's being ridiculous hedging his bets in case you die, that's quite mad.

[homicidalmatriach]

Ah I think some of you have misunderstood - we haven't had sex for 13 months so far and after many attempts this is the first time I've got an explanation.

[TheFallenMadonna]

Ah.

Condoms?

[Dropdeadfred]

do you still want to be with him?
does he still want to be with you?
how many kids have you got, as you mention 'several' but then later say he has two?

[LoveMyGirls]

Omg it's already been a year?

So is he expecting you to go without sex too?

If my chap expected me to go without for a year well I don't know what I'd do tbh, I would probably get him a bit merry, put on my sexiest outfit and totally seduce him. Have you tried this?

What about the implant? Condoms? Injection?

[homicidalmatriach]

"I don't like condoms" he says.

Two kids, we lost one

I think he wants to be with me but who really knows?

[Sidge]

Couple of housebricks.

Wait till he's asleep with legs akimbo.

Job done.






PS You can take the combined pill after 35 if you aren't overweight or a smoker by the way. If you are breastfeeding you would have to have the progesterone only pill instead of the combined pill anyway and you can certainly take that after 35.

[LoveMyGirls]

He'd rather go without sex than wear a condom or get the snip (btw pain is minimal apparently and he'd be back at work within a couple of days)

[homicidalmatriach]

I don't think hormonal injections or pills are a go-er. I'm over 35 and the pill isn't recommended in most cases and I'm breastfeeding too - which is a problem for all but the minipill, which isn't as effective apparently.

[AnyFucker]

hm, you haven't had sex in 13 months because he refuses to have a vasectomy ?

what does he suggest that you do about it?

I would be eyeing up the local male totty tbh

why don't you use condoms?

or doesn't his majesty he like them ??

[TheFallenMadonna]

Bollocks to not liking condoms. Honestly - men are ridiculous about this IMO. Condoms or vasectomy in this house. Well, condoms...

[AnyFucker]

ah, cross posted

the selfish twat doesn't like condoms

thats OK then........

[FromGirders]

He's a wimp. My dh was back at work the next day and dancing at a ceilidh four days later.
Sex isn't a very high priority for him, is it?