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Anything your parents have let slip now you are an adult that you were oblivious to as a child?

(317 Posts)
twentypence Sat 06-Sep-08 10:39:08

My dad said on the phone "oh, there's that mountain we climbed on the telly. You remember when I took you and your brother away for a holiday and mum stayed at home."

I didn't catch all of what mum said - but it was something to the effect that she wasn't best pleased to be reminded of the time they split up.

I had no idea - I just thought dad got more leave.

GentleOtter Sat 06-Sep-08 10:45:30

At the ripe old age of 48, I have just discovered that they got my birth date wrong.By a whole week. FGS.

twentypence Sat 06-Sep-08 10:48:59

That's impressive GentleOtter - but a handy excuse for 2 lots of presents a week apart.

SparklyDiscoGirl Sat 06-Sep-08 11:07:22

I didn't twig on that my mum was pregnant before they got married until I was about 20.

They were celebrating their 20th anniversary when I suddenly realised that my 20th birthday was only 4 months later. grin

Imnotok Sat 06-Sep-08 11:11:18

That while I thought my dad was working away he was actually shacked up in France with a girl called Lenora and she was PG with triplets but lost them .

Told to me by my mother when she got very very drunk one night shock

lulumama Sat 06-Sep-08 11:13:24

my mum had a job when i was at primary school. grin

didn;t know as she was always there in the morning and to pick us up after shcool

my parents were hippys, many pics of them in kaftans and long hair and looking dreamy.. i am surprised there was not any 'out there' revelations...

twentypence Sat 06-Sep-08 11:18:02

Imnotok - that is quite something - did your dad come back?

psychomum5 Sat 06-Sep-08 11:21:20

I only found out when I got married that the way I spell my name is not the way it is spelled on my birth certificate.

apparently my mum was high when she registered me and gave the wrong spellingsad, and it came out when I applied to get married. I now have all official stuff with one spelling, yet anything else has my spelling (oh, and the spelling it should be and the one I was taught by my mother!)

Mamazon Sat 06-Sep-08 11:24:46

found out when i was 18 that i have an older half brother.

pagwatch Sat 06-Sep-08 11:31:08

When I was about 8 a relative from Ireland came to live with us for a while. She stayed several months and had to share a room with my 3 sisters and I.
It was great fun. She was the same age as my sister ( about 17) and we all had such a great time.
One day I woke up and she was gone.
Yes I know I am dense but it truly was only when i was about 18 myself that her visit was explained.
Thrown out for getting pregnant she stayed with us until she had her baby and then left to start a new life in Aus.
I couldn't believe that a) I hadn't spotted her pregnancy as she was a slim girl b) that the older brothers and sisters had kept the secret from the younger ones ( including me) and c)that my dad - who I had always thought of as stright laced and likely to be furious about that sort of thing had arranged it all including her support and move to Australia.

I still find it all weird.And less that the pregnancy was hidden etc but more that I so misjudged my dads moral compass

Imnotok Sat 06-Sep-08 11:31:08

Yes my dad came back we were living with my Grandma and my mum just fetched him back one night .
Then we moved to a new house and they had two more dc .
They are still together now.

psychomum5 Sat 06-Sep-08 11:31:35

oh mamazon. I found I also had a half brother when I was 16.....he was younger and altho the rest of the family knew, no-one mentioned it to meangrysad.

how did you react? and have you met him since?

Smithagain Sat 06-Sep-08 11:34:48

That my dad was married and divorced before he married my mum. He decided to mention it for the first time about two weeks before my wedding. Because his first wife had gone through with getting married and then immediately decided it wasn't for her sad

No idea if there are any half siblings. Have decided to let it rest!

Wasn't my dad that told me was my uncle but found out a few years ago that my dad was going to be charged with death by dangerous driving after my mum died in a car he was driving - they didn;t charge him because they thought it was best he stayed with his kids than go to prison - I wish he had gone to prison now as he really fucked up being a dad and a bit of bum sex by some big shaven head, tattooed man may have made him a nicer person!

ShowOfHands Sat 06-Sep-08 11:41:30

I was aware that we had no money but didn't realise that when we went camping for our annual holiday (3 miles away from home), my Dad would take on casual night work to afford it, leave after we were asleep and come back before we woke up. Just so we could have a holiday. He used to fall asleep on the beach a lot!

DH's Grandad found out a few weeks ago, that he has a half brother. His elderly mother- still going strong at 86- phoned up and said 'come round, your brother's here'. It's a sad story tbh. His Dad was away for the whole of the war, she met an American serviceman and had a baby. The serviceman wanted to stay but ended up back in the US, her dh came home to a 2yr old boy that wasn't his and said 'it's me or him'. She drove him to the children's home the following day, cried all the way there and back and has never cried since as 'she doesn't deserve to'. Kept the secret for 60 years.

ilookbetterwithdrink Sat 06-Sep-08 11:42:59

my "dad" was nto my real dad at all. he only came onto the scene when i was 3/4.

everyone just assumed i knew so when something was mentioned when i was about 23 they were all surprised i was shocked.

Imnotok Sat 06-Sep-08 11:44:36

SOH that is so sad

SheSellsSeashellsByTheSeashore Sat 06-Sep-08 11:45:44

oh god MC thats awfull! i have found out loads about my parents since i was older.

i guess the biggest thing was finding out my dad had been married before and had a daughter. i was 13 when i found out.

i was about 17 when i discovered they also smoke weed occasionaly. though untill a few months ago i thought they had stopped. untill me and my sister were fooling about saying "oh lets go and buy some drugs do you know who we can some from?" <to each other but infront of my dad> when he replied "yes actually i do. what sort of drugs do you want? i have got some really good hash upstairs" hmm we are still trying to figure out if was serious.

<disclaimer. by drugs we actually meant diet pills. i am not a junkie>

used2bthin Sat 06-Sep-08 11:47:30

That my parents aren't married. Which wouldn't shock me at all, in fact I was always a bit suspicious as my mum was really vague when I asked about their wedding day. My uncle was discussing another uncles wdding and said to me dad did you and (my mum) ever get round to getting married? Me and my Dad looked at each other and laughed!

DisasterArea Sat 06-Sep-08 11:47:40

shock at these.

my mum mentioned that she hadn't actually spoken to my father for 5 years before he finally fucked off. none of us ever noticed.or thought it wierd that she slept in my sisters bedroom.

PurpleOne Sat 06-Sep-08 13:07:48

I was 32 when my mum told me I had an older brother who died. I had no idea sad

Still have never seen a photograph.

twentypence Sat 06-Sep-08 19:37:40

That one about going out to work nights while you were camping - that's an amazing story. Most of the rest are either sad or shock.

Having kept their mouths shut for so long - you just wish they had remained shut don't you?

cmotdibbler Sat 06-Sep-08 21:14:14

I never realised as a child that my grandmother would have intermittent psychotic episodes and be sectioned or just not be in a frame of mind for us children to see for months at a time. I found all this out when, aged 13 a policeman turned up before school and told my mum she'd gone missing again - turned out she'd killed herself that time.

A lot of family stuff came out after dads aunt got back in touch after 30 years (nan would take against people, and forbade other family members to contact them, and her rage was too much to deal with) and she told him a lot of stuff.

Took me years to work out that brother being born in December, when my parents had been married in the April didn't quite add up, esp with how overdue he was...

Mamazon Sun 07-Sep-08 12:03:50

psycho - no never met him. my dad doesn't even know his name. just that he has a son.
its quite sad really. dad was 14, got his 16 year old girlfriend pregnant. her family were very rich (the dad was CEO of phillips electronics) they were not best pleased that there privately educated daughter was knocked up by a local oik so they moved to Amsterdam.

The girls mum wrote to my gran and said that he was born healthy and happy but that they would like it if they were left to bring him up alone.
preety easy considering no one had any contact details for them.

I found out that my mum's ldest sister is only a half sister. Apparently my gran had a fling with someone and got pregnant with twins. He wasn't interested but my grandfather stepped up and married my gran even though she was pregnant with someone else's babies. Sadly, one of the twins didn't survive. My mum always said she thought she was her dad's favourite (they had another 4 children) which would make more sense as she was actually his first child.

My mum thought i knew though as her older sister looks nothing like her and her other siblings. I had no clue.

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