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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Pregnant and alone

6 replies

choccypuddin · 26/07/2008 16:50

I am 28 weeks pregnant and the babys father left me. We have been seperated for 3 months now. He as told me he regrets what he did but i dont know if i can trust him. We are currently not in contact. Is their anyone going through a similar experience ?

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clouded · 26/07/2008 18:49

Are you feeling confused and lonely? I guess so and maybe frightened about the future. I'm not gong through a similar experience, but didn't want to leave you unanswered. I expect other mums will be along soon to help.

Do you have any family nearby choccy or any friends to support you?

Do you want him back? I expect you do, but are scared that he'll leave again. It sounds like you hadn't been pregnant long when he left. Was he frightened by the responsibility?

What about posting in Lone parents (or perhaps you already have). How is the pregnancy going? Are you well?

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clouded · 26/07/2008 18:54

OK choccy,I see you have posted on another thread and got some support. That's great!

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madamez · 26/07/2008 18:54

DS dad was not around when he was pregnant, but I did have supportive friends and family: do you have people close by who can look after you? With regard to your XP, it's probably best to start working out a way of managing a co-parent relationship ie you both put the DCs interests first and remain as amicable and civil with each other as possible. Have you consulted a lawyer with regard to your home etc, or did you not live together?
Basically, good luck, it is not as bad as it seems and being a lone parent is much better than being in a crap couple relationship with a partner who is violent, lazy or just plain useless.

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HarlotOTara · 27/07/2008 12:04

My daughter's father left me when I was 26 weeks pregnant. She will be 18 next week and is waiting for her A level results. I suppose what I am trying to say that although it was a massive shock at the time we both survived and she has been an absolute delight. He quibbled over maintenance and walked past us both in the street plus other stupid and thoughtless behaviour. Get as much support from as many people as you can. It can be lonely but it is possible to come out the other side (don't mean to sound self-satisfied or anything). With hindsight, I was mad thinking it would ever work between him and me.
Keep posting

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choccypuddin · 29/07/2008 08:43

Thanks everyone for your advice. I havent had contact with my ex for a while now. I asked him if he would help support me financially through the pregnancy and he as totally ignored me. It just really hurts to think he can be so heartless and selfish

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solo · 29/07/2008 08:51

My Ds's father was the same, walked away when he found out I was pg. He has no contact and my gorgeous Ds will be 10 in a couple of weeks...it can be done on your own, but make no mistake. It's hard work.

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