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Relationships

Minor moral dilemma post involving people I hardly know and have no wish to.

17 replies

ConnieDescending · 08/05/2007 17:17

Dull post for a dull day.

At DH's last work conference, we were seated by his colleague who I had never met and his gf who I had never met. We got on ok and she asked for my email addy which I gave her.

Then they split up...or he split with her and has totally severed all contact. Now she is always MSNing me all the time but is abit vulnerable and young acting so I've tried to be kind. Anyway, was trying to shake her off and she announces she thinks she could be pg.

I have now had the saga of she doesn't know if she is or isn't for days and whether she should or shouldn't tell her ex. I've told her to get it confirmed first and then she as to tell him.

Now I have an inkling this is all drama to try to get a message to her ex through my DH. I've told him this and he doesn't want to get involved. I've had enough of the whole saga so should I sever contact with her?

OP posts:
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LoveMyGirls · 08/05/2007 17:19

Id just avoid her.

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Pruni · 08/05/2007 17:19

Message withdrawn

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Fimbo · 08/05/2007 17:20

I think I would block her from my MSN if it was me. But others may think differently

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mumto3girls · 08/05/2007 17:22

Tell her you and Dh are not passing on any info to her ex so if she wants to speak to him to just ring him herself.

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ConnieDescending · 08/05/2007 17:22

When you block people from MSN- will they know they've been blocked?

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ruddynorah · 08/05/2007 17:54

no they don't know they'be been blocked. it'll just look to them like you're never on line. she'll guess you've blocked her though but so what?

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Bucketsofdynomite · 08/05/2007 18:38

Yup, ignore her until a reasonable time has elapsed for her to do a test. Just say you've been busy with your family. Don't even mention it to your DH or he will be in a dilemma and she needs to know (by continued silence from her ex) that none of you are interested enough to talk about her.

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lulumama · 08/05/2007 18:42

if a virtual stranger is telling you all this on msn, then she must be a drama queen and short of friends..i;d sign out of MSN for a bit, and if she gets back in touch, ask her if she has had a test...actually, just block her! You don;t owe her anyhting

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Freckle · 08/05/2007 18:47

You could set your msn to show you as permanently busy or away - although other contacts would see that too.

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essbee · 08/05/2007 18:48

Message withdrawn

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ConnieDescending · 08/05/2007 19:42

ok will block her....just didn't want it to say 'you have been blocked' or whatever as thats rather harsh.

She has been doing (apparently) loads of tests which are both neg. and pos. and I'm starting to think she's a bit attention seeking.

Just knowing my luck he'll get back with her and I'll have to face her at the next works do.

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FiveFingeredFiend · 08/05/2007 19:45

She's full of poo.

block her.

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Bucketsofdynomite · 08/05/2007 21:58

If they get back together I would ask her in a jokey manner whether it was all a ruse to get his attention.

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Blu · 08/05/2007 22:01
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rowan1971 · 08/05/2007 22:02

i love this thread title, btw

it's just dripping with ennui

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madamez · 08/05/2007 23:24

You might want to send her the contact details for a few organisations like the BPAS and/or some counsellors if you think she might benefit from some counselling. Agree that you are under no obligation to act as this woman's unpaid therapist when you barely know her, and am suggesting you steer her towards professional advice merely so you don't feel bad about it later on.

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snowleopard · 09/05/2007 00:06

Yes I would give her the brush-off but try not to be cruel. I agree it might be nice to refer her to some helplines or support groups - but I would tell her sorry, I am very very busy, I don't feel I really know you and your ex is my DH's colleague so I don't feel right about talking about him and his issues (i.e. whether he has just fathered a child).

I've learnt my lesson because I got majorly latched onto by a similar woman from my ante-natal class - her boyfriend left her and she became very needy. In the end I had to shake her off and did hurt her feelings, which was awful but she wouldn't leave me alone and was acting like a 4-year-old who needed a mum - which I certainly couldn't handle with my own new baby to think of. At one point I did think "hang on, you've only just met me - if I had your problems there are about 45 people I'd confide in before I'd talk to you... where are your friends?"

Your supercool thread title suggests you're a bit wiser to this type than I was anyway...

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