Do you think it is more acceptable for a husband to use porn if he's getting naff all sex from his wife/partner?

[just4today]

(whose libido has packed up and gone AWOL)

[paulaplumpbottom]

Is he just looking at it?

[just4today]

As opposed to...?

Yes, afaik.

[Carmenere]

As opposed to what, appearing in it?

[paulaplumpbottom]

Well he could be chatting online or allsorts

[PregnantGrrrl]

i think porn is acceptable regardless, provided one partner doesn't have a strong opinion against it.

[just4today]

I don't have a particularly strong opinion against it. But it's the whole done-in-secret thing that gets to me a bit. I can tell he's been online today as MN had lost my login (as had my email) - he must have deleted cookies.

[just4today]

Anybody else?

[lulumama]

agree with pregnantgrrrl.......

[Blondilocks]

At the end of the day it's better than him going elsewhere for it.

[gtimama]

I think porn is OK if you both enjoy it. But agree that I don't like the secrecy thing. Anyone been watching that Sex court thing? There was a guy on there who was watching porn whilst having it away with girlfriend. He was pushing her face into the pillows and just getting off on it on his own. She was mightily upset!

[EllieKthePA]

i agree with pregnantgirl too

[Hilllary]

I'd rather he looked at porn than went out looking IYKWIM

[Roseanna]

As long as you don't think it lets you off the hook as far as addressing your own sexual problems is concerned because that's when it could become dangerous and lead to behaviour that would really undermine your relationship.
Keep talking to him.

[xenabelly]

Roseanna - very good point!

I am in opposite relationship. My hubby has nil sex drive and we never have sex and even when we do it's rubbish.

I have a v high sex drive so use porn and erotic fiction to 'sort myself out' on a regular basis. Hubby knows I do this but I never do it when he's in the house (well not often - ha ha).

However, i think because hubby knows that i'm giving myself orgasms he thinks he doesn't need to deal with our sexual problems - it's a case of he doesn't need orgasms, if I want one I'll give myself one and everyone's ok....errrr NO!!

As a result of this going on for years and years, I have finally gone and found sex elsewhere, I can't live without feeling desired.

I think it is totally acceptable to use porn whenever and even more so if you're not getting any from your other half. Although it's always joked about being sexually frustrated is an awful feeling!