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Relationships

Is he now saying he would like more than a fwb?

23 replies

Timetobookaholiday · 15/01/2017 22:23

So I have been in a fwb relationship on and off for about 9 months.
Tonight we were texting about things, and I commented how we were just fwb, and we have no commitment to each other.
He then invites me to a weekend abroad away in march..fully paid for by him.
Am I reading to much into this...or is he saying he would like more?

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TheNaze73 · 15/01/2017 22:25

Sounds like FwB with a sweetener thrown in.

Have a great time, if you go

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Timetobookaholiday · 15/01/2017 22:50

I should have said it's weekend away with another 10 couples...does that change things?

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jeaux90 · 15/01/2017 22:52

You sure it's not a swingers weekend??

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Timetobookaholiday · 15/01/2017 23:20

No it's watching the rugby..unless there are a lot of swingers watching rugby?Shock

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BoxingHelena · 16/01/2017 00:32

no, I personally wouldn't think that two days away changed the nature of the relationship
If we were actually talking about it and he said nothing, that's your answer, surely ?

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BoxingHelena · 16/01/2017 00:32

you, not "we"

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Manumission · 16/01/2017 00:34

If weekends away signalled commitment then "dirty weekends" wouldn't be a thing, would they? Sorry.

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Lucked · 16/01/2017 00:37

Perhaps he feels safe inviting you as you have convinced him you only want to be fwb

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Manumission · 16/01/2017 00:41

If you want more commitment, you need to say so.

Threads like this are worryingly common.

Nobody in this life will just give you what you want (career, relationships, housing, anything) OP. It's up to you to make sure you get it.

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daisychain01 · 16/01/2017 04:19

Throwing money at the situation doesn't make it different. He just wants to do it in a different country. Maybe variety is the spice of life?

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user1478860582 · 16/01/2017 04:34

Would you like it to be more?

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Isetan · 16/01/2017 04:36

I commented how we were just fwb
Shouldn't he know this already? And if you feel the need to reiterate your 'status' then you two really aren't on the same page.

If you are FWB as opposed to fuck buddies, then being invited to friend type activities isn't unusual. However, if you'd just prefer the occasional booty call then you need to spell it out. You've both agreed to not be in a relationship and if you feel the other person does or you do, then be grown up about it and talk.

Unless you have other evidence, the weekend away is purely opportunistic. He gets to couple up with a friend in the company of other couples (the gf experience) without the commitment of a relationship. However, if you are uncomfortable acting like a couple, all be it temporarily, then say so and decline the invitation.

If you want more that FWB, say so and if you don't, you need to clarify the parameters of your interactions.

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ChishandFips33 · 16/01/2017 05:26

If it's with 10 other couples is he not just asking to make up the numbers?

If it was just you and him, that might be a little different

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Timetobookaholiday · 16/01/2017 08:29

Thanks for the replies, it helped me get things into perspective. Especially the dirty weekend comment!

I don't want a relationship with him, and in posting it proves this too me, as I started to panic! I was dreaming of ways to sabotage things last night!

I can see why he's invited me as it's rugby, which is where we met, and it's a couple thing, tbh I miss having someone to go to events with, so it'll be nice to do something with him.

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Buttonmushroomex · 16/01/2017 09:39

It's the friends part of the FWB isn't it?

If you think he's being straight about it, and you are making yourself clear then go and enjoy yourself.

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BoxingHelena · 16/01/2017 21:29

Isetan what is the difference between "FWB as opposed to fuck buddies"

  • genuine question -
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Justaboy · 16/01/2017 22:33

Why don't you just tell him where you stand on the matter?. Seems he wants to take it further or rather take his shagee with him for a bit..

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pocketsaviour · 16/01/2017 22:43

what is the difference between "FWB as opposed to fuck buddies"

To me, a FB is someone you ring/text for a quick shag, then leave straight after. a FWB arrangement means you're friends who also have sex - you'll sometimes meet and do stuff that doesn't include sex, whereas with a FB it's just sex, no other interaction.

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daisychain01 · 16/01/2017 22:57

I think the only difference is that one sounds slight less distasteful than the other.

Both descriptions sound like a bloody awful basis for a relationship.

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SandyY2K · 16/01/2017 23:26

what is the difference between "FWB as opposed to fuck buddies"

I was thinking this as well.

It does seem like calling it a FWB is dressing it up.

I've seen the explanation below

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Justaboy · 17/01/2017 22:53

daisychain01 don't think your being an unnecessary fuddy duddy! It sounds for some man a very good arrangement a woman who wants a shag as and when it suits her but these days maybe as I'm now older I think I'd find that difficult and meaningless to do without some emotional connection too.. pardon the non implied pun;!

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1DAD2KIDS · 17/01/2017 22:57

I have enjoyed the occasional romantic weekend away with FWB. So possibly reading too much into it. I would not use the holiday as a guide to his mind. Listen to way he talks to you and you/us. Has there been any change? Any language that suggests something more?

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BrondeBombshell · 17/01/2017 23:03

maybe he realises he'll be the odd one out as a single man if he goes alone and he wants you there so he'll ''fit in''.

It sounds comfortable enough but if you want a relationship with somebody this arrangement is going to 'block' it from happening I think, especially when you ahve so many mutual friends.

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