Hi all,
I am really at the end of my tether with my husband. He cannot do anything independently and behaves like a teenager.
I will ask him to do simple tasks like make a phone call, hang the washing up, pick some milk up on the way home. 95% of the time he will 'forget' to do what I have asked, and it has got to the point where I am actually in utter disbelief when he does do something!
He will ask me to help him with silly tasks like 'help me load the dishwasher', 'help me give our son a bath' or 'can you check if our sons dinner is too hot?' It is so frustrating because I feel like these are things he should be able to do independently.
We had a massive argument tonight because I have been asking him for a month to ring up student finance to organise a grant we need for his course. He has to do it because the account is in his name, so I can't ring them and sort it myself. Every time I ask him to ring them he says 'I will get round to it' - but he never actually does! It is driving me insane. He misses appointments because he 'can't remember' when he was meant to attend them.
It really is like living with a teenage boy. I have to instruct him what do to, most of the time he doesn't do anything I've asked, he watches porn frequently and neglects our sex life.
I am sick of feeling like I live with a teenager.
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Husband is a teenage boy.
user1479512536 · 18/11/2016 23:51
I'm sorry you're going through this 
It's called tactical incompetence. He sounds exactly like my immature STBXH. In my experience they never change. You have two options, accept it or start making plans to leave.
Yes, they do exist. I now have a DP who is actually that, a partner. Not a dead weight.
The difference he has made to my life is immense. He is like this 
as, as far as he is concerned, he is merely acting like an adult.
I've never had the bailiffs luckily but if I did I think I'd have tied him up and beat him with a stick at that point.
Did that incident not frighten him enough to realise he has a family to be responsible for???god i would be seriously questioning his ability to be the man of the family or would he rather go home to his mum???
Just as a thought does he have a mother that bleats about how annoying it must be but then always wades in and pulls him out of the crap?my mil used to be like that for a good few years we were married and eventually I just got sterner with both of them.
It came to a head a few years ago when he rang mil asking for money to pay a car bill as he'd ran out and I refused to help.
I txt her and said I had refused to help as I'd already bailed him out that month and that I'd had enough now so unless she wanted him back at home forever she needed to step back and let him be a man.
My fil also told her the same and it worked.
Tell him that unless he starts growing up he's out the door no negotiation there as you've had to deal with his lack of responsibility for too long.
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Detach yourself from the frustrating things.
Maybe look at finances and make sure yours are covered but tell him none of his share of personal bills will be covered from xxx date unless he sorts out the finance and then leave him to deal with it.
Do you have separate accounts and bills?if not I would be opening a separate account and starting to shift things around so your covered with finances.
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