I kinda need to see this written down to help make sense of it.
We have a 12k debt, paying back over 5 years. We have 2 cars, one good one on its last legs. We rent and have it guaranteed for 3 more years.
Dh earns an ok wage (25k) I earn 12 which is good considering I'm unskilled. He works 37 hours, I work 26. Neither of us can work anymore. However I want dh too try and get a better paid job, he is skilled and could if he believed in himself, but he won't,can't,doesn't want to. We have no luxuries, can not cut anymore than we already have.
He is an excellent dad, but quite often needs reminding about basic things, like bedtime times, bathing them etc, he's essentially lazy.
My constant question in my head tho, is this it? Always scrimping and saving, never getting our heads above water, no plan for what will happen in 3 years, no plan if the old car goes bang.
If we were to split up I'd be entitled to extra tax credits etc so id actually be better off financially and I reckon he'd go live back at home as he couldn't afford maintenance and rent somewhere else.
Is it better to be in a safe mediocre relationship or to jump and be a single mum? I'm v introverted so would struggle to meet anyone plus live in a small (backwards) place.
I don't have a plan but I know I can't carry on feeling meh about it all.
Jump? Stay? I don't know what will make me happy and no one in rl who is impartial. Part of me just wants to pack the kids up and move to New Zealand (but I know running wont help!)
Urgh. So much of this stems from my own feelings of inadequacies but I do know if it wasn't for the kids we wouldn't be together.
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Help me work out what I want!
12 replies
Verticalvenetianblinds · 17/11/2016 14:30
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