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Family annihilation

(3 Posts)
LittleOyster Wed 09-Nov-16 19:26:07

I have sometimes read in the papers about horrific cases in which a husband/father has murdered his wife and children before committing suicide, an act which seems usually to be triggered by debt, bankruptcy, separation or some combination of these. And in the last year I have read a few threads on the Relationships board in which women are struggling with feelings of uneasiness and fears that, in extremis, their partner might be capable of this kind of atrocity. I find all this really, really troubling - not least because in the past, in very dark times, I have had these kinds of worries myself. What I want to know is, how can these crimes be prevented? I once read on here, on a previous thread, that in one in three domestic violence murders, the killing is the first act of violence.

So if a woman senses that something is wrong, what can she do to take steps to protect herself and her children, without hard evidence of wrongdoing? She's not going to be either legally or morally justified in denying her husband access to the children on the basis of fears which are without objective grounds, is she?

Sorry - not a very pleasant theme for a thread, but I’d be interested to know MN-ers’ thoughts…?

VestalVirgin Wed 09-Nov-16 22:16:48

Well, if you already suspect that your partner might be capable of this kind of atrocity, then you should get out of the relationship and make it seem like it was his idea.
With a strategy like this: 180rule.com/the-gray-rock-method-of-dealing-with-psychopaths/

Other than that, I am afraid an individual woman can do nothing to prevent that. Perhaps discouraging men from viewing women and children as property would help, but that can only be done by culture - more precisely, men have to stand up against objectification.

LittleOyster Wed 09-Nov-16 22:44:15

Thanks for your response, VestalVirgin. I've read the link - very interesting.

And, sadly, I think I agree with you that there's not much that individual women can do to prevent these crimes.

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