Ok I am probably just very confused. In no way do I want to minimise the experiences of those who are or have experienced abuse but I don't know if my situation is or not. It could just be me feeling a bit tired at the moment
I am going to do what a lot of posters seem to do and say that in general I think he is a good guy. Works hard, spends quality time with our dd. I just want some perspectives on each of the following points
Over the 8 years we have been together there have been spells of name calling about my body - along the lines of thunder thighs, chubby. After dd was born we were not intimate for about 9 months as he found my belly 'off putting'. Recent comments have happened during dtd - e.g - 'if you were more toned I would dtd with you more often' 'if you get a six pack we can have another baby'. I am at the stage now where I just block it out so it actually doesn't upset me as much as it used to. I used to tell him that it was hurtful but he just didn't get it.
One instance during dtd when I said I didn't want to do something and him saying he would do it anyway. I repeated no and he stopped. He has never been physically abusive with me.
One that is just 'annoying' waking me up to dtd after he comes to bed much later than me and I am already fast asleep
When dd was born, refusal to help with night feeding at all. Thankfully she slept through at 3 months but I was on my knees with exhaustion and begged him to help. Complaining about his sleep being disturbed when I went to feed her.
DD is very hard to settle at night. She is almost ready to drop her day time nap but sometimes she is so exhausted she really needs it. Last night she was screaming for me to go to her. He thinks we just have to ignore her until she learns to settle. I can kind of see his point but he threatened to break up with me if I went in to see her last night. She did settle eventually.
Payment is due for dd's swimming lessons. We need to pay for the next term or will lose her place. he says he wont pay for it until we have talked about a few other things that need doing in the house. I don't have the cash to pay for it or I would just do it myself
Telling me my admin job is rubbish and that I should get a better job / earn more money. I work ft and do all shopping / cleaning / pick ups and drop offs / any appointments / laundry etc
Sorry this is long. I just need a rant
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I dont know if this is abusive or if I am just oversensitive?
148 replies
Onlyonce · 25/10/2016 10:04
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