My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Great article about what makes a successful relationship

11 replies

Vagabond · 18/10/2016 15:40

Hi there, I came across this on social media. Great article about the importance of tuning in to your partner, being kind etc....

It's a very good article and would urge you to read it. Everyone on the smug or unhappy spectrum will relate. :)

www.businessinsider.com/lasting-relationships-rely-on-traits-2015-11?IR=T

OP posts:
Report
ifitsnotanarse · 22/10/2016 00:09

Thanks for posting that Vagabond. It's really helped during a difficult time. Kindness is definitely underrated.

Report
JoJoSM2 · 22/10/2016 00:28

A cool article ;)

Report
LookingOldBeforMyTime · 22/10/2016 02:16

Interesting article and the whole site looks worthwhile. Thanks Vagabond.

Report
heyday · 22/10/2016 08:52

All a bit idealistic but definitely something to think about and consider. Long term relationships are tough so any practical advice is helpful.

Report
jeaux90 · 22/10/2016 09:24

Great article thanks for posting x

Report
corythatwas · 22/10/2016 10:15

I thought it made very good sense. Not least the bit about how you respond to good news. Usually relationship advice is all about how you conduct arguments and of course that is massively important, but people sometimes forget that you can wear somebody down just by being a wet blanket when they want to share something.

Dh is very good at taking an interest, but I do have another family member who is unpredictable: can be absolutely wonderful when invited to share news, but on the wrong day will be "Oh. That doesn't sound that great." Only happens now and again, but every time it's like being slapped round the face with a wet fish. Have never quite been able to work out if it's jealousy or depression or simply failure to read my signals and understand that I am talking good news. But if that was my everyday reality I'd be a lot less confident than I am.

Report
wonderwoo · 22/10/2016 10:34

Really interesting, thanks for posting. I am okay with being positive with good news I think, but do struggle with dp "bids" for connection often. Especially at the end of the day, when I cannot be arsed and just want to switch off and read/watch TV etc. Although, maybe it's okay to have a boundary and a sense of this is my quiet time, please respect that. Food for thought.

Report
Vagabond · 22/10/2016 15:24

Wonderwoo, I agree with you. I sometimes just want to switch off right at the time that DH wants to chat. I know I want to switch off but didn't realise how much I actually do it by reading my iPad and being closed off.
I do think that kindness is under-rated though so, that's a great thing I took from the article.

OP posts:
Report
wonderwoo · 22/10/2016 15:45

Yes I agree. Its very cheesy but a little bit of kindness goes a long way and makes the world a nicer place. I shall take that message with me too, and aim to consciously do one extra kind thing for my dp each day. Its so easy to get caught up in the speed of life and stuff that needs to be done, and I do take my dp for granted sometimes.

Report
TempusEedjit · 22/10/2016 17:46

Thanks vagabond

Report
Dowser · 23/10/2016 00:13

Hmmm interesting. We can all do with a bit of fine tuning from time to time.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.