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I can't tell if I have pmt or if I'm being set up

(7 Posts)
Idontmeanto Wed 28-Sep-16 20:45:38

About £50 of supermarket vouchers have gone walkies. I know I left £10 worth lying around, but the rest were safely on the pin board on the kitchen. I think I know Dh has binned them. (The majority are for Waitrose, he thinks we can't afford Waitrose. We are struggling, but if I'm selective about what I buy there I think they are worth using. He's denying all knowledge. I strongly feel I'm being manipulated, but don't want to argue with him. I really don't have the strength to leave him. I want a nice hole to crawl into and cry.

pocketsaviour Wed 28-Sep-16 20:55:49

Have you been out to the main/recycling bin? Assuming it hasn't been collected.

If he is properly gaslighting you over this (i.e. actually trying to make you think you've gone mad, not just denying his own wrongdoing) thyen you know you need to leave.

thisismyfirsttime Wed 28-Sep-16 20:56:52

Why would he think you can't afford Waitrose if they're vouchers? Aren't vouchers 'free' to you (i.e gifted or earned by spending etc)? Why on earth would he throw them away?
I'm not saying he hasn't, but what would motivate him to do so?

idontlikealdi Wed 28-Sep-16 20:58:41

Rod you mean the Waitrose spend £30 get £6 off ones or whatever it is or do you mean cash value vouchers?

Idontmeanto Wed 28-Sep-16 21:01:08

He's the product of a very oppressive upbringing. I don't think he really thinks through the effect of this kind of thing on me, but there are lots of seemingly trivial examples like this.

Idontmeanto Wed 28-Sep-16 21:03:14

Re the vouchers it's a mixture of the two. Some actual cash value, some with a minimum spend, but well within normal grocery shopping limits for our size family.

AyeAmarok Wed 28-Sep-16 21:05:18

Sounds like gaslighting. No wonder you sound exhausted pet. It really messes with your mind.

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