Marriage has been a struggle for a long time with a lot of head burying. I've got to the point I couldn't take it and his behaviour anymore.
I told him how I was feeling, the fact I feel taken for granted, expected to do everything, him thinking he could say and do what he wanted and there be no repercussions.
I'm a sahm he works ft, I don't expect a huge amount just some support and assistance when he's around, simple things like moving his own pots, picking up his crap from the middle of the living room, when he can't find something (because he's forgotten where he's put it, not that it's been moved) that it's not ok to throw things around dump the ironing all over the kitchen floor sofa cushions all over the living room and walk away for me to pick up. The list is pretty long.
I told him calmly all of this and received some really shitty responses, name calling (lazy bitch was a particular highlight) told to fuck off and find somewhere else to live, he was sick of bank rolling me and he expected my half of the bills by the end of the week.
We finally sat to have a chat where he listened to me, was rather patronising in the process. He claimed he wasn't sure how he felt and needed time.
Fast forward 4 very long miserable weeks and I try and talk to him again. He just won't talk, I'll ask him a question he doesn't answer but turns it back on me, won't explain anything.
He asked me what I wanted, I explained that I'd been telling him for a long time what I want. That was the wrong answer, what I wanted wasn't the answer to the question and didn't constitute a good relationship. Told me to go away and write down what a relationship and tick off what we have (bit like talking to 5 bloody 5 year old).
I'm afraid I got really bloody angry shouted a little and stomped off for a walk (that moment when you step outside and realise it's bloody freezing and you didn't pick up a coat)
I don't know what a reasonable amount of time to think is?? I'm torn between thinking he's pushing and pushing until I end the marriage so he's not the bad person, or that he's going to continue saying he needs time thinking he can do that I'll give in and nothing will have to change, that way he doesn't have to admit he's been an unreasonable shit towards me.
Fml right now
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Relationships
Need some space to write things down and get a little perspective
slightlyinsane · 19/09/2016 08:55
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