My partners ex boils my blood.
She says nasty things about me to him via whatsapp (he had a day off work to take me for an invasive hospital procedure which i was nervous about and she took a shift at work so he had to have his son and couldn't come with me... she called me a baby for not going alone despite it being sedation so i wasn't allowed to go alone and none of my family could get time off).
She also has us drop ss off later than usual if she's working but still doesn't turn up until 20-45 minutes later (good thing i've driven them these times so they haven't been soaked in the rain). She also had us drop ss off at her mothers who ended up not being home (i had to borrow petrol money off a nearby family member to be able to take him home).
She also informed dp on friday (2 days before school starts) that ss needs trousers, jacket, pencil case and pens etc plus gym kit for school. Dp and i had just paid out ÂŁ240 for a new cooker as ours broke on thursday night.
Dp told her he only had ÂŁ40 for the rest of the month but her response was " the gym kit can wait til next week but he needs everything else".
We took ss to blackpool at the end of july and paid about ÂŁ800 for the hotel, tickets for things, travel and food etc to make up for the fact we went abroad with my parents in july (partly paid for by them) and if shd had told dp he had to buy this stuff then, we could have budgeted for it all.
We managed to get the money together for what he needed and go most of it in town yesterday. Had to go back to town today to get the gym kit. I said i would drive them to town so me and dp could go collect mine and my sisters dogs from the groomers straight after.
Cue ex not giving a time or place to meet so i had to park in a long stay carpark due to having no change on me. We also had to get her a birthday gift from ss for her.
She was meant to meet us outside the shop for the gym kit just as we got there.
Turns out she wasn't even planning on meeting us and expected us to walk 20-30 minutes to the market area to drop ss off to her.
This really pissed me off because not only had she made us spend money we didn't have, she was now messing us about.
(Dp and i put our spare money after bills together so whatever he spends is my money too).
Dp then left me by myself on a bench in town while he went to 'meet' her and ended up going all the way to the market while i'm sitting like and idiot by myself for 40 minutes.
I honestly was so angry with her i felt like crying. I honestly don't know what to do. I love my partner and we're due to get married in a few years and, despite not having much in common with ss, we get along. My issue is the ex. Everytime she messes my dp about he takes it out on me and we end up arguing. I even said that instead of paying a wedding i would gladly spend the money on court fees to get a legal agreement in place about drop offs, times and who pays what for ss. Dp flat out said no he wouldn't waste the money on it.
To me, it'll be a relief knowing she can't mess us about and has to bloody communicate like and adult.
I feel like if nothing changes and she keeps doing this crap then i won't marry him cause i can't take the stress.... my job is stressful enough without my homelife adding to it.
People keep saying 'take nothing to do with it, he's their kid'. But he will be my ss and any money spent on him is half mine. Plus when she messes dp around it has a knock on affect on me.
Long winded i know, sorry.
Advice please x
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Relationships
Dp horrible ex
Louise2092 · 14/08/2016 20:20
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