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Friendship Problems

(11 Posts)
user1466222549 Thu 11-Aug-16 14:30:04

My 13 year old DD had a friend for a sleepover a few days ago and it all went horribly wrong. They started play fighting (in the middle of the night, unbeknown to me) and it turned physical. The friend started pulling DD's eyelashes out and DD responded in kind.They fell out badly and the DD's friend asked me to take her home in the morning, which I did.

DD was supposed to be going to her friend's house tomorrow for a birthday sleepover and doesn't want to go. Apparently the friend would still like her to come, despite the falling out.DD wants me to tell friend's Mum that she is ill and can't go.

I feel that I may as well be honest and tell the friend's mum DD doesn't want to go as I don't think that she will really believe that DD is ill anyway in the circumstances.

Which would be the best thing to do? I don't want to cause upset, but not sure how it can be avoided.

loveyoutothemoon Thu 11-Aug-16 16:27:53

Be honest, say she doesn't want to go because she feels uncomfortable after what happened and that she needs some space.

user1466222549 Thu 11-Aug-16 17:14:08

Thank you loveyoutothemoon I'm inclined to think that honesty is probably the best policy.

loveyoutothemoon Thu 11-Aug-16 19:24:02

Definitely smile

SteviebunsBottrittrundle Thu 11-Aug-16 19:26:13

Agree with the above^^.

Lilaclily Thu 11-Aug-16 19:28:22

They pulled each others eye lashes out ?! Is this normal for teenager girls ?
Ds is 12 and I've never heard of this sad

user1466222549 Thu 11-Aug-16 19:52:51

No. Definitely way outside normal. Never had to deal with anything like this before. The friend apparently started pulling DD's eyelashes and DD responded by biting her hand to stop her.Absolutely awful and all at 4am in the morning.

user1466222549 Thu 11-Aug-16 19:56:59

DD is annoyed with me now as I have said to DD's friend's mum that she wasn't comfortable to come on friend's birthday sleepover. DD wanted me to say she was ill. I have now got DD's friend texting me to try and change my mind. I hate awkwardness like this as am a natural people pleaser at heart.

Lilaclily Thu 11-Aug-16 19:59:49

Oh no :-(
Could you suggest they meet first maybe and sort it out

SteviebunsBottrittrundle Thu 11-Aug-16 20:30:04

I would want to speak to the other mum again not the friend. What does the mum think or does she even know what actually happened?

user1466222549 Thu 11-Aug-16 22:35:54

I told the mum that it was play fighting which went too rough, but didn't go into the details. DD's friend has "Form" for lying, so suspected that if I had gone into the details , the friend would have denied it and things would have got very awkward.

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