I posted here at the weekend about my husband chasing a younger woman at work. The bigger issue is that he is EA and gas been for such a long time that it has become so normal that I feel like I am making a fuss over nothing. I get the silent treatment regularly for up to 3 weeks at a time, he will speak to the kids very happily, but treat me as though I don't exist. The atmosphere in our home when that is going on is horrific, it makes me have panic attacks. I gave tried to reason with him over the years (have been known to actually beg him in the past to speak to me, just to take the anxious feelings away. I spend my whole life when he is talking to me walking on eggshells incase I upset him again and get another dose of it. In January, after 3 weeks of this shit, I told him I had had enough, I didn't want to live like this anymore. I hate the person I have become, like a pathetic excuse for a human being. Outside of the home, I have a great job, am financially independent, etc - it's just when I am at home that I feel like crap. We have two DCs who I worry about as they are getting older. I worry that he will transfer his silent treatment to them as they grow up and want to be independent and have opinions of their own. Husband is very short tempered, he goes off about things the average person generally wouldn't, is so horribly derogatory to me in the way he speaks when he is in the moods and then just snaps out of it weeks later and we are all supposed to carry on as normal. I have decided that I no longer want to be married to him or live with him anymore. Have seen a solicitor for advice, counsellor, etc and made up my mind. My problem is that I just DO NOT have the guts to tell him! It's in my head and my heart, it just won't come out of my mouth. I suppose I am just scared of his reaction, but what's the worst he can do? Not speak to me?! He can say one thing to me in a certain way and I am actually paralysed by panic.
Anyway, as I have seen a number of brave threads on here about people having the guts to leave......if you have any advice or experiences to share, I would be so grateful. I really need to know that one day very soon I will get the courage to do this!
Thanks for reading.
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Relationships
How long does it take to get the courage to leave EA?
12hours · 09/08/2016 07:15
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