Long time lurker so this is my first post. Please be gentle as I am feeling extremely fragile. Met dp when I was in my late teens, now late 30s DP late 40s. Two DC and a nutter of a dog. I need some perspective on this, was I right?
A few nights ago my car was at mechanics, I work nights (4am this shift). I could have booked a taxi to get home but DP said he would ask his mom to stay over so he could pick me up. I asked him before work if this was still ok
I finished my shift, he wasn't there. So I called him, he said to start walking and he would meet me. I then called and text him numerous times, no answer. Didn't want to use house phone because DC2 is a very light sleeper. I ended up walking all the way, 30 min walk at 4am in the morning. No taxis available.
When I got home, his mom was asleep on our sofa. He then threw a strop because I woke him up getting into bed. I cried myself to sleep.
I hoped expected seeing as he had been an ass that he would let me have a lie in and he'd get DC fed and ready for swimming. No, he woke me up lay in bed taking to his mate about golf. His mom had fed kids before going to work. He then proceeded to spend the morning sulking like I was in the wrong.
I lost my temper. He works long hours but he plays golf every freaking weekend. I cope with the housework, kids, homework, temper tantrums, bath time and bed every weekend. He doesn't give me that back, he doesn't ever say he will take our dc so maybe I can have a morning shopping or get my hair cut. We've not been intimate in a while, but how can I even want sex when I am so tired and I feel so old and unloved by him. I asked if he would like our children to be treated this way when they are parents? His answer, I could f off if I didn't like it.
It didn't always be like this. But this past year he seems to hate being around me. I know I have put on weight, I don't have the time or energy to look nice anymore. I'm always close to tears which apparently makes me unstable and I need medication.
I used to be the centre of his world. For the last birthday and mothers day, he brought me something from his shop. So he put no thought or interest into it. I feel like an after thought.
That same day, he said he was going out for painkillers and came back two hours later. After I had cooked tea, bathed kids, got ready for work etc. He couldn't understand why I was nearly crying again.
Normally if I was reading this, I would bd thinking ltb. Its not that easy is it? I would have to change jobs, I have no claim to the house as its in his and his moms name ( too young and stupid at the time). I do honestly love him, this is new behaviour. Feel so weak and alone.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Was I wrong
user1469549964 · 27/07/2016 13:11
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