So, I accidentally realised I'd got find my iphone set up on my ipad recently. DH away so out of interest I looked up where he was. For the last three nights he's been away on business his phone has tracked to the right city, but not to the location of the hotel he claims to be staying in. I've used google streetview to check out the locations where his phone is supposed to be, two have been completely residential and the other a multi-storey car park, all in different cities and all roughly a mile or two from the hotel, in different directions.
The car park would definitely have needed a car to get to, he didn't have his with him, and that night his phone tracked late evening to the hotel, then appeared in the car park for at least an hour around 4.30am, then back at the hotel breakfast time ish. I'm pretty sure he would have needed a lift or taxi to make the journey.
One of the other nights his iPad tracked to the hotel, but his phone to a location some distance away (it would have been a good walk or several stops on a bus) from at least 21.45 until 07.30 (I spoke to him at that point, he sounded perfectly normal). At 09.00 his phone and ipad were both at the hotel, then at his work location.
For background, and so as not to drip-feed, we've been together 30+ years, a couple of years ago I found out he'd shagged another woman - I had positive proof so he couldn't deny it - he said he'd got drunk and been chatting to her in a bar and one thing led to another, swore it was a one-off. Of course since then I've found it VERY difficult to trust him, and to believe that it really was a one-off, (lots of opportunity for it not to be), though I really try to because a) we don't have any other issues, I do love him, we get on well, good sex life etc., (I would have found it easier to understand him shagging someone else if he wasn't getting it at home, but he was/does), and b) the kids would be devastated if we split, I think it could do serious mental health damage to the eldest who's already a bit wobbly, even if we did it amicably. DH thinks I should just be able to accept it was a one-off, forget about it and move on, I was distraught at the time and have found it very difficult to do, but we have rebuilt things from that point and put it behind us, and have since made a lot more effort to get regular time just the two of us. If I ever mention it (I do, but rarely, not for several months at time, I can't remember when it last came up), he gets quite angry with me about it, he just doesn't 'get' that I can't just forget about it - as far as I'm concerned it happened, the one person in the world who I should be able to trust broke that trust, and as they say, you can't put the genie back in the bottle. No-one in RL knows about this.
Our other mobile devices are tracking to within 10 meters of where I know they are - so can I reasonably assume that what I'm seeing on find my iPhone is roughly correct? If I confront him about it and I'm wrong I think it will be terminal for us, for the reasons above, trust is already a little fragile, I really need to be 100% sure something is going on before I say/do anything. It doesn't look good, but I'm trying to keep an open mind at the moment, 30+ strong years and an otherwise good life, (I actually have friends who tell me DH is a rare example of a decent bloke, works hard, great with kids, housework etc), a lot is at stake. I've given the bank statement a good going over for any anomalies, but can't see any. Feeling really horrible that I suspect something may be amiss, not sleeping well and can't put it out of my mind. Any advice / suggestions please?
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Relationships
Tracking DH with find my iPhone, how accurate is it?
Snowkitty · 13/07/2016 12:59
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