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Was ready to cheat but...

(15 Posts)
Crazyforyouu Sun 10-Jul-16 16:38:03

I have been living in a long unhappy marriage that seems not to go anywhere. I met someone some months ago and fell in love, did not do anything about it though.
My feelings for this other guy kept getting stronger and I felt so much like having an affair with him. The chance to spend a night with him finally came and I knew it was wrong but oh, how much I wanted it!
The day came and I gave up on the last minute. Just couldn't do it.
I know it was for the best but I feel so sad and can't stop thinking about him and what it could have been.
Anyone else in the same situation? How do I forget him and move on?

Goingtobeawesome Sun 10-Jul-16 16:40:15

It's better you didn't do it. Forget him and either work on your marriage or leave it but get this man out of the equation

Cold turkey, no contact. It's the only way and it will get easier with time.

KittyLane1 Sun 10-Jul-16 16:46:39

I think you did the right thing, as much as it must have hurt you. How did the man respond when you backed out?
What do you want to happen now?

pinkyredrose Sun 10-Jul-16 16:50:34

Maybe your feelings for this guy was symptomatic of your unhappy marriage he took you outside of your normal environment and made you see another life. Tbh if your marriage is making you want to cheat then it's probably time you split up.

Crazyforyouu Sun 10-Jul-16 16:53:57

Kitty, he is an amazing guy, understood my point... no pressure. That makes me love him even more. 😞
Honestly, I wish I could have another chance to be with him. But I know it is wrong... I am more or less grieving.

Crazyforyouu Sun 10-Jul-16 16:55:15

I know I need to split up... So hard to do.

AtrociousCircumstance Sun 10-Jul-16 16:56:33

Don't stay in a miserable relationship. Talk to the man you love, tell him you need time to resolve your current relationship. Then end your unhappy partnership and see if OM is still around then.

KittyLane1 Sun 10-Jul-16 16:58:48

Go and have a chance with him, life is short, you are unhappy. But make sure you are single first. Dont give your husband the upper hand of you being a cheat.

But remeber the other guy ia human too, with flaws and irritating habbits of his own and once the fantasy is reality it might not be as good as you imagined.

Is he single?

Crazyforyouu Sun 10-Jul-16 17:03:12

OM is not someone I can be with for many reasons. Let's say he is not really available.
It would be just an affair anyway... Unfortunately.

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman Sun 10-Jul-16 17:19:53

If he is not available then he was never yours to have in the first place. Hold your head high, walk away and either work on your marriage or get out of it it is not easy but it is worthwhile.

AcrossthePond55 Sun 10-Jul-16 17:20:26

Both you and your DH deserve to be with people who love you and whom you love back.

Why don't you leave and free up both of you to find real happiness?

Crazyforyouu Sun 10-Jul-16 18:30:54

Thanks everyone. Trying to put some order in that mess now. Let's see what comes next.

Stepmotherofdragons Sun 10-Jul-16 19:22:07

Use this as a wake up call to leave your unhappy relationship. If the nreader guy is that great he will wait until you have sorted out your current relationship. I did similar. I am usually a very faithful person so realised my marriage was dead for me to even consider looking elsewhere.

Crazyforyouu Sun 10-Jul-16 21:59:05

I agree. I am faithful too. I realize the relationship has to be really bad to make me look for someone else.

Princesspinkgirl Sun 10-Jul-16 22:03:25

I was in a unhappy marriage and did leave to be with someone else note I did not sleep with the new guy before I left my marriage I did not cheat I don't regret leaving you can't stay in a unhappy marriage

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