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Is it flirting? Should I run a mile?

(23 Posts)
Fedupd0tcom Sat 09-Jul-16 19:19:11

Ok. So in my previous post I was saying I'm unhappy. If I was to leave I'd want to be alone as I need to do some massive soul searching.

However....I'm concerned a man seems to be after me at a market I used to go to regularly.

I have since tried to stop going there and hadnt been for 4 months or so but today we were in the area so I went in and ended up chatting at his stall while buying some stuff. He's constantly making innuendo. He sells bedsheets and says 'do you want me to come and measure your bedsheets?' And 'you like Lucy from the Office and she's gorgeous' and 'hello gorgeous'... seems like mere harmless innuendo.

Then today it was 'what you doing tonight? Wanna do something tonight?' And when I gave him money he stroked the inside of my hand.....! And then I remembered it had happened before.

His colleague also said 'oh he's in love surg you....he wants a fling and thinks you're gorgeous'.

He jokingly said once....wanna go to the hotel down the road to cheer you up....etc etc....

Is it harmless market banter....harmless flirting or something more?

Imho he is drop dead gorgeous however he is also coming across sleazy with his comments....I feel he may be pushing boundaries and I don't know if he's joking or not.

Whilst I'm flattered by this rate attention...I don't want to have an affair and add to my troubles. Though he does make me laugh I know it will end up on hell.

Should I avoid the market or is he just joking me around? Grrr.

Fedupd0tcom Sat 09-Jul-16 19:20:35

Sorry for the typos....I'm v sleep deprived

ButIbeingpoor Sat 09-Jul-16 19:38:12

You know what? I'd stay away from the market.

Flatbellyfella Sat 09-Jul-16 21:04:31

Market traders are known to behave like this, sooner or later they will get a lonely woman to fall for their constant flattery, until the next one comes along. In a club I belonged to , there was a married man that ran a market stall in Bristol, & it was like a contest between him & other traders as to who could get the most women into their beds. I never heard any more from him after his third wife kicked him out, not that I was ever a friend of his.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GarlicStake Sat 09-Jul-16 21:15:59

There have been times in my life when I'd go for it, on the basis that it might be a fun experience - and if it's not so fun, never mind.

Times when I've needed to do some massive soul searching, or have been so unsure of myself that I can't tell sleaze from healthy interest, are not the right environment for a random fling.

Just say haha, sunshine, in your dreams - and get along with things that matter. This bloke objectifies you. He isn't interested in who you are as a person. You don't need it!

YvaineStormhold Sat 09-Jul-16 21:16:05

Fruit and vag man

Best. Typo. Ever.

grin

Pearlman Sat 09-Jul-16 21:16:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

YvaineStormhold Sat 09-Jul-16 21:16:57

Ask if you can squeeze his plums, see how he reacts?

Pearlman Sat 09-Jul-16 21:17:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

YvaineStormhold Sat 09-Jul-16 21:17:50

Oh mind you, he sells sheets.

So that might be a bit of a single entendre 😳

AnchorDownDeepBreath Sat 09-Jul-16 21:17:57

Your options aren't to avoid the market or have an affair. There is a big middle ground. You could go to the market and avoid his stall, or go to the market and just have strong boundaries.

He could like you. He could know that markets tend to be full of lonely women and be trying his luck. He could be a flirt because that sells. It doesn't really matter - you're not in a position to have anything with him so you don't need to read his intentions.

If you don't think you can resist him, avoiding the market is best.

GarlicStake Sat 09-Jul-16 21:19:07

grin Scarf, you spent too long around those traders wink

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GarlicStake Sat 09-Jul-16 21:48:45

Fnarr, fnarr ... wink

Fedupd0tcom Sun 10-Jul-16 07:42:28

Lol.........love all your responses. Thank you. Fruit and vag man...excellent typo!

maxeffort0satisfaction Sun 10-Jul-16 08:14:24

sleazy. I bet you he does it to any other woman who accepts his comments.
you must be showing him signs that you don't mind or that you are liking this and flattered so he is getting worse..

why do u even need to keep buying sheets from him??

he is sleazy .. if he actually fancied you he would have been more polite to you and gave you his number and not made hotel remarks..

very lowly and cheap.

Theearthmoved Sun 10-Jul-16 08:26:02

Yes how many sheets do you need to buy? You could just get them from asda instead.

A bit of a flirt is harmless enough but offering to take you to a hotel there and then is sleazy. I wonder how many women take him up on the offer.

Theearthmoved Sun 10-Jul-16 08:27:17

Asda do fruit and vag too wink.

flowery Sun 10-Jul-16 08:30:10

Why would you need to avoid the whole market? As you have recently purchased sheets presumably you won't need any more for a couple of years so won't be going to his stall. He can practice his 'banter' on all the other women and it will be no skin off his nose.

Fedupd0tcom Sun 10-Jul-16 10:17:29

Lol....
I actually haven't bought any sheets from him lol.

But I do need some. I'll be going to m&s lol! He was so busy chatting his nonsense and I too stunned that I walked off.... Annoyingly though he also sells clothes for LOs that are good quality but really cheap. But seeing as I bought loads yesterday I'll be avoiding his stall from now on... so embarrassing!! And yes I think his comments made me nervous....so instead of telling him to f off I giggled....hence he thinks I like his comments.....I'll admit I am flattered...so it is my fault a little but I'm not going to his stall anymore....what an eejit man

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