So me and my now ex have been together for 12 years. It's not been a smooth relationship it's had its ups and downs and breakups but we got back together about 3 years ago and decided to make a proper go of it.
We bought a house got engaged and have a 10 month old. Since February arguments have been getting progressively worse, at one point he changed the locks and refused me and my son back in the house...we had been tescos to do the shop after an argument.
It seemed like every month he would end up back at his parents or chucking me and our son out, we'd make up and go through the whole process again.
Monday morning he lost it with me, I didn't retaliate shout or provoke the 'argument' but he ended up smashing the house up (I won't go into what this was about its so trivial) and shoving me. I genuinely believe he was emotionally abusing me and had been for quite sometime. Everything was always my fault he even told me it was my fault that he smashed the house up.
He got arrested Monday night and charged today with criminal damage and common assault which will go to court. His bail conditions state he can't contact me but he's called my mum saying he's not paying for the house if he's not living in it(he did this to me before because he knows he can hold financial bullying over me) I'm now at the point where I kind of don't care if the bills don't get paid because I'm that exhausted by it all.
I don't know how to move in, how to get the ball rolling, I know I won't get approval for a mortgage on my salary but I don't want to waste whatever money I get out of the house on rent with nothing to show at the end of it. I feel like he's always held finances against me and he's going to come out on top as per.
If you've been through it how did you cope? What did you do? Any advice? I feel so emotionally tormented how can I cope with the practical side?
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Relationships
ending in a bad way
8 replies
user1466282058 · 06/07/2016 00:33
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