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Friendships

(9 Posts)
feathermucker Mon 04-Jul-16 14:37:19

Does anyone with anxiety find themselves struggling in friendship situations sometimes?

I'm part of a few groups of friends and I find myself analysing how they interact with each other and how that compares with my interactions? I.e. If they say "love you" to each other and might not say it to me......on Facebook etc.

It sounds ridiculous, I know, and is heightened when my anxiety is worse.

I suffer from anxiety anyway, am on medication, have had CBT which I try and use, but it's a lifelong thing for me and was just wondering if anyone has coping strategies.

I sometimes get quite anxious if I'm not tagged in things either and repeatedly apologised to a friend a few times and annoyed her a few weeks ago.....slowly getting back to norm

feathermucker Mon 04-Jul-16 14:38:09

al now.

I know it sounds ridiculous, but I'd really appreciate any experiences/tips you might have.

Thank you

feathermucker Mon 04-Jul-16 18:35:24

Anyone?

category12 Mon 04-Jul-16 18:38:23

Stop using Facebook perhaps? If you're given to over thinking those sort of interactions, then perhaps give it a miss and just text/call people to keep in touch?

CrazyDuchess Mon 04-Jul-16 18:43:28

Clearly your anxiety is the issue here - maybe avoiding FB until you have managed to get it better controlled? I use a combination of mindfulness and CBT techniques and no longer reliant on medication... and take FB with a massive pinch of salt!

something2say Mon 04-Jul-16 19:07:40

I can see where you're coming from. Sounds as tho you are watching and learning xxx carry on and see how little everyone else worries and how ,ist things aren't that serious.....but do carry on and soak up everything you can about people and social skills and being 'normal' .

emmaliz Mon 04-Jul-16 20:39:07

I would agree to avoiding Facebook. As an anxious person myself it made me question the interactions on there and get very hurt if someone didn't like a post I'd put on there (for example. )
So I deleted my account and I can't tell you the freedom it brings. Real life interactions are so different and that's what I now base how I feel about someone and my relationship with them on, rather than if they pressed a like button or not.

AddToBasket Mon 04-Jul-16 21:52:50

You are normal! People get anxious about friendships, because friendships are important.

I think the problem is you are experiencing this in a really heightened way and letting it get through to you in a way that you don't need to. There are loads of anxiety aids/worksheets etc which might help you - just google. And take up a hobby that doesn't involve the people you know. It is good to become a bit self-sufficient in terms of entertainment and enjoyment.

Cut down on facebook. It is very neurotic making. And it is also lots of bullshit. smile

daisychain01 Tue 05-Jul-16 08:34:59

Yy to reducing or removing Fb access, and the emotional freedom it gives!

I've come to the conclusion, Fb is great if your life is shiny ( or you're good at faking it!) and you are adept at being 'in with the in-crowd'. And have the time needed to invest in all that stuff.

Me, I haven't got the emotional energy or inclination, I can just about keep my life together without the added complication of worrying what people on and off Fb think.

I'd recommend a course in "resilience' - coping strategies for building your inner strength.

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