What do you think we could do?

[DontLookForShootingStars]

Finally told DH last night that I think we should call time on being married and work at being friends like we used to be, to which he has agreed. We are in a housing association house, he's retired and I'm working but can't get a mortgage so will be sharing space (with DS15) for now. What rules/agreements/plans do you think would help us make this work for the foreseeable future?

[Jan45]

I would advise not doing this tbh, if it's housing association can you not contact them and let them know what has happened, they might find a place for you and your child?

Sorry but it sounds like a recipe for disaster and that you are doing this because it's easier than actually making changes but I don't see how it can work unless you both agree to never bring a partner into your lives which sounds hardly likely, don't leave it until you do meet someone, sort out your separation properly.

[Cabrinha]

What do you mean by the foreseeable future? Until 6 months to sort out renting somewhere, until your son is 18, or leaves home, or forever?

Priority would be agreeing what to tell your son.

Then rules about finances - if one of you has more income it doesn't matter when you're married, but could lead to resentment if a lower contributing housemate is leaving the lights on, tumble drying in sunny weather, drinking more wine, etc...

Longer term: dating. Is it allowed? Is the other person willing to speak to dates? If I dated your husband, and want your confirmation that it wasn't cock and bull that you were separated!