Hello,
First of all posting here for traffic. I'm a long time lurker, haven't posted my own thread before so I'm a bit nervous as to how this will be received. Anyway onto why I'm starting this thread.....
I'd like some advice, tips, direction, anything to help with how my life is at the minute. Feel like its a disaster, nothing is working for me, everything just feels like its falling down round me while I watch.
I'm a 33 year old single parent to a teen girl. I suffer from depression and have been diagnosed with gad, for which I'm on medication. I work in a job that is quite strict. I have been through a terrible few months/years and financially it has been really tough. I rang in sick a few times a few months ago and because of this was no longer being offered hours. I dont receive any benefits apart from tax credits so anything I had was going to bills and rent. Training is a must and has to be updated regularly, but because iv been feeling so low I convinced myself I would panic in the training, which I have done before. Iv avoided it for a while and today it came to a head and until I update my training I no longer have hours. I'm ashamed of myself and just feel like a failure in everything I do. Theres a lot more to my story and what iv went through in the past, but this means struggling financially again. Barely being able to pay bills. Making sure I dont eat much so my daughter has enough and money for other things.
I barely go out of the house, I have no hobbies no matter how hard I try to think of something I can enjoy. I know I'm depressed, my GP just palm me off with medication, I have no mental health support, my family are no support and I don't see them or talk to them. I have no friends, nobody I can talk to or reach out to.
My only purpose is my daughter. Shes the reason I get up in the morning and she's getting to the age where she wont need me anymore. I'm sad, and feel hopeless every day. I have fire in me and havnt had for a long time.
I'm dreading having to go to my workplace now in the next few days to speak with the lady who trains me. Shes quite intimidating and I know I'm 100% in the wrong with not updating the training when I should. I feel like I'm about to lose my job. Iv lost who I am. When I first had my daughter I was 18. I was back at college 2 weeks after I had her. I worked full time, lived on my own, went to college full time....
I'm not good enough or feel not good enough to have a partner, I dont feel worthy of anything or anyone. I'm talking too much now. I just want to know how can I attempt to get my life in some sort of order. Iv been to counselling so many times and in on meds so any suggestions other than that if possible? I can go a bit more into my past if needed, I wont here as this is getting far too long. Thanks in advance for any help /suggestions.
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advice needed please.
14 replies
Bop33 · 23/05/2016 18:17
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