I feel like I'm on the brink of a meltdown, I've never felt this low in my life and I've told dh we need time apart which he won't give me. He wants us to work on our marriage but I have tried so much and he hasn't. I think about past events and think why did I continue this like the second date we went on someone cut I front of him while driving and he went insane screaming and swearing I was mortified. Him accusing me of cheating because I was texting a friend when he was at the time messaging various women on Facebook. A family member of mine was dying in hospital, I turned down a night out with friends because he said we never see each other then he arranged to go out with a friend (who has made it clear he doesn't like me and I'm not welcome at his home) then was absolutely awful to me when I came back from the hospital. A few days after our wedding he told me he didn't love me and I found him viewing casual encounters sites, when I told him I found out he hit me across the face. He tells me he's too tired to have sex with me and secretly goes to the bathroom to watch porn or does it while I'm at work (and he has our small child) he also has a terrible habit of looking at other women then denies it and says I never let him do anything and feels trapped. I admit I'm not self confident but I used to be before I met him. He complained about staying in hospital because he got no sleep while I had our baby, I had to get an operation because I nearly died and he was worried about sleep? I don't know if I'm just having a bad day but I really don't understand how I'm the bad one here. I've never hurt him, never cheated, I never go out, I work full time so we can have nice things yet all I get is well nothing? I don't know why I'm posting, sorry, I just feel so down :(
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