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New man taking a job long distance?

(9 Posts)
jessyk Thu 28-Apr-16 23:22:12

I have literally just started a new relationship and he's talking about working long distance and coming home at weekends. He has kids from a previous so I am concerned about when we would ever see each other.

Am I worrying about something to be sorted out later, or is it ill advised to be getting more involved with someone if I feel they are about to make a life choice that would make a loving relationship very difficult?

Bluejay100 Thu 28-Apr-16 23:46:20

Very difficult. Is he involving you in the decision?

jessyk Thu 28-Apr-16 23:50:25

No, aside from asking my advice on various things, we're not at that stage yet but my only doubt with him has always been that he is a bit of a workaholic and this is only going to make matters worse sad

LovePGtipsMonkey Fri 29-Apr-16 01:00:36

I would pull out before it becomes a pain!

LovePGtipsMonkey Fri 29-Apr-16 01:03:01

and it will be! most people can't cope happily with long distance, especially when a relationship is supposed to be exciting and developing/getting closer. You'll be stuck in some half casual stage for ever .

TheNaze73 Fri 29-Apr-16 07:28:34

Why worry about the future, if you've only just started any form of relationship. Go with the flow & see what happens

LovePGtipsMonkey Fri 29-Apr-16 12:16:58

that's the point though, Naze, there wouldn't be much flow or spontaneity if he is LD. And more importantly, no change forthcoming - so why spend time and presumably emotions if it's not going in the direction that's comfortable for OP? I think it may be worth it if this person really appeals to you and a soulmate, but if you ar not especially hot on him, no, I wouldn't. All meetings will be on his terms which will cause slow resentment, he couldn't be there if/when you need help or moral support either.

witsender Fri 29-Apr-16 12:37:45

It would tell me he isn't that serious about the relationship.

AndTheBandPlayedOn Fri 29-Apr-16 14:32:59

^^this, what witsender said.
Step back. The workaholic tag that your gut is telling you is the reality with this bloke as well. You will probably never be a priority for him even if he did stay local.

Is he really leaving though? It might be a manipulation that if you'd accept LDR with him, then you might not have a valid complaint if he stays but is also never available due to long working hours, iyswim.

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