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Relationships

When do I make decision to leave dh?

8 replies

Dizzyingly · 15/04/2016 02:39

I am tired of his drunken outbursts.
He is a troubled man who is not happy.
I try to show him how to appreciate the simple things and be happy.
We have 2 children.
How do you know when the right thing to do is walk away?

OP posts:
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Creampastry · 15/04/2016 06:40

Because you are thinking of it. Because he sounds horrid. Because you want more for your future.

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stilllovingmysleep · 15/04/2016 06:45

What do you mean 'drunken outbursts'? Is he an alcoholic? Is it occasional drinking (not that that's OK but some context might be useful).
I'm afraid, sadly, you can't 'show' anyone how to 'be happy'. That's something he will, if he can, do only for himself. Clearly your DH suffers. Do you know why?

The question is whether you want to stay with him--and if so, why? what are his good points? It's not obvious to me, at least from your thread, what he's like when he doesn't have these outbursts. Are there good parts to your relationship?

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fitzbilly · 15/04/2016 06:47

You leave if you are not happy and the relationship is not enhancing your life.

And in my opinion, I'd you are thinking of leaving then that's a good time to leave.

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stilllovingmysleep · 15/04/2016 06:49

fitzbilly, if everyone left their marriages when they think of leaving, there would be no long term relationships left.
Yes of course if the OP isn't happy in the long run that needs addressing and maybe a separation is needed, but we don't have enough context for that.

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hejsvejs · 15/04/2016 07:07

Whilst you are thinking about wether you should leave him or not, start working on your exit plan. Make sure you e it money for a deposit on another property or somewhere else to go so that leaving is realistic should you decide to do it.

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Joysmum · 15/04/2016 07:40

It's right to walk away when the relationship isn't making you both happy, or better people, and the likelihood is that things won't change.

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fitzbilly · 15/04/2016 16:42

Stilllovibgmysleep I mean if you are really seriously considering it, not a fleeting annoyance.

I think if it's something you actually think about seriously then the relationship is going no where. To many people are in unhappy unfulfilling relationships. There is no need to be.

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stilllovingmysleep · 15/04/2016 17:09

Yes you're right of course fitzbilly.

OP could you give us some more info / context so that we can be more helpful? It's hard to know if these are just occasional outbursts or a much more established pattern. And how are you doing today? (I noticed you wrote your post very late last night so may have been having a tough evening)

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