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Am I over-reacting about this, I just think its so insensitive

(19 Posts)
isthismylifenow Mon 11-Apr-16 10:05:48

I have posted quite frequently, have separated from dh of 20 years, just over 3 months ago. Been very up and down since then as per expected.

So yesterday a family member of his, has tagged me on Facebook with a picture that says "I don't believe in divorce, marriage is for life".

I am so fucking livid. How very dare she! She knows nothing of our relationship, not even living in the same country. I am just so tempted to put a comment on there just to let her know how it was him who cheated on me and broke up the marriage.

I have been so upset about everything that has happened these past few months, but this just feels like the knife being twisted.

I wont reply of course, I know that I have done everything I could to save my marriage, fought and fought for years to make things right, to no avail. I shouldn't have to defend myself, I have done nothing wrong.

Some people just live in their own world don't they, have absolutely no idea what some people have been / are going through.

Slowdecrease Mon 11-Apr-16 10:07:40

It's Facebook isn't it, what are you going to do. Hide her feed.

LineyReborn Mon 11-Apr-16 10:10:16

She's an idiot.

I'd put a lovely passive-aggressive comment on, though. Or block and delete. Depending what mood I was in.

hellsbellsmelons Mon 11-Apr-16 10:13:09

I think a reply of 'WELL GOOD FOR YOU' smile - will suffice here.
Although I know that I would post 'ODFOD' if it was me.
I really would! She won't really know what it means if she is in another country and it will bug the hell out of her. And if she does know, even better!
But you will know and can sit with a satisfied grin on your face!
Then block her totally, She's a knob!

ravenmum Mon 11-Apr-16 10:14:34

I've had a few comments of this type and yes, it's ridiculously insensitive and stupid to criticise people for splitting up with their unfaithful arse of a partner. Actually had it from my own family, in a "shouldn't you try to sort things out" way, as if I can do anything about him sleeping with other women behind my back, and as if I should "take back" someone who a) doesn't want me back and b) is a dirty little shit. No, they have no idea what is going on...

I blocked and unfriended him and his family pdq, so haven't heard from them.

CommonBurdock Mon 11-Apr-16 10:16:22

No you're not overreacting. She's a sanctimonious little cow and wouldn't dare say it to your face.

Engaging with or responding to that kind of thing only brings more pain.

Life's a lot more fun without facebook.

Buzzardbird Mon 11-Apr-16 10:18:49

I would just post "you can chose marriage, you can't chose family...unfortunately" and then block them.

LineyReborn Mon 11-Apr-16 10:18:51

Possible replies:

That's you and the Pope, then. And I thought it was only fashion sense you shared.

Have you ever thought of becoming a relationship therapist? You can download qualifications from the internet. It didn't do Gillian McKeith any harm.

Fuck off.

RudeElf Mon 11-Apr-16 10:19:04

Reply with "well dont have a divorce then confused"

Or

"I believe divorce has been proven to exist"

Guiltypleasures001 Mon 11-Apr-16 10:20:20

I would be itching to go with what a previous poster has said with the ODFOD
But I suppose block and delete is the grown up way to go halo

Cabrinha Mon 11-Apr-16 10:20:25

Tag your STBXH is your reply and say "thanks <her name> for this - I agree - <STBXH> see - your friends think the same as me, shame you didn't and cheated and ruined it".

Of course ignore and block is more sensible.

I really think I would private message though and say "thanks, I know you're "his friend" but it really means a lot to me that you haven't just sided with him, that you too think marriage is so important. I'm gutted that he cheated and ruined it. Thank you - hope he sees it and realises I'm not alone in thinking it was wrong of him, that marriage should have been respected for life".wink

Ouriana Mon 11-Apr-16 10:21:24

Id also be tempted to go with passive agressive comment.

Something along the lines of "totally agree marriage should be for life why cant fuckwits like XH understand this and stick to the marriage vows?" You could tag him and add a few huns and xxxx's in too grin

Or be mature, take the moral high ground and just ignore, people like this really are not worth bothering with.

gamerchick Mon 11-Apr-16 10:23:09

Just block her it's not worth it.

OllyBJolly Mon 11-Apr-16 10:25:39

the right thing would be to block.

I'd probably not do the right thing and say "Me too, Pity your brother didn't (or whatever relative he is). And I do like Liney's response.

isthismylifenow Mon 11-Apr-16 10:39:03

Thanks all, for cheering me up wink

I am having a laugh at the replies.

But I will block her, and let her carry on her life with her blinkers on.

LineyReborn Mon 11-Apr-16 10:55:48

It's all you can do really, isn't it, smile wryly and add the info to your mental spreadsheet. smile

HandyWoman Mon 11-Apr-16 11:00:57

Oh I love the opportunity to cull Facebook 'friends' - I would consider this a golden opportunity not to be missed.

Block her and enjoy the rest of your day.

smile

LineyReborn Mon 11-Apr-16 11:11:04

Actually I'd personally go with a variation on RudeElf's 2nd suggestion:

'I believe divorce has been proven to exist. Unlike God.'

georgiatraher Mon 11-Apr-16 12:03:57

You can be untagged through FB and then just ignore.

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