Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Tell me in being naive

(17 Posts)
marylinmonroeroe Thu 07-Apr-16 22:14:35

I've been talking to someone on tinder for nearly a week and I really really like him already. I'd almost given up with online dating but there's just something about him that feels different and we haven't even met yet. I know I'm probably setting myself up for disaster by getting my hopes up but I'm excited!!

StuckMelia Thu 07-Apr-16 22:21:45

Well, you know what you're doing. Just be careful and enjoy! smile

HandyWoman Thu 07-Apr-16 22:24:24

Meet him soon, very very soon...

marylinmonroeroe Thu 07-Apr-16 22:35:06

The first date is in a week but now I'm thinking I should bring it forward to this weekend?? Is it sooner the better?

HeddaGarbled Thu 07-Apr-16 23:12:24

No, you've arranged the date. Trying to rearrange to make it sooner will make you look desperate. You do sound a bit desperate. Try not to make that too obvious. Good luck.

justdontevenfuckingstart Thu 07-Apr-16 23:15:18

Speak to him on the phone, don't overdo the texting and don't start dreaming of things in your head! Make sure you have some cash and let someone know where you are with a back up call just in case. Best of luck.

goddessofsmallthings Fri 08-Apr-16 01:36:10

Emotionally investing in a man you haven't as yet spoken to or met in the flesh is naive in the extreme and may cause you to overlook red flags flaws that would be obvious to any other woman.

Are you desperate to be in a relationship? If so, there's a vast number of conmerchants on OLD and other hook up sites who''ll fleece you regard you as ripe for the plucking.

You are best advised to make sure your head is firmly in charge of your heart and reserve judgement until you are 150% sure that the stranger you meet is who and what they are claiming to be.

That said, I hope the date goes well and that you will observe the rule which decrees that those who post here in relation to first dates are obliged to return with a full and frank account an update after meeting their potential suitors. smile

GraysAnalogy Fri 08-Apr-16 01:38:01

It's not naive, it's completely natural to want to and find connections with other human beings.

just be smart and be safe and hope it all turns out well.

GraysAnalogy Fri 08-Apr-16 01:38:12

I hope* i meant to say

TheNaze73 Fri 08-Apr-16 07:12:21

Don't get carried away, agree with other posters of not rearranging, that would look desperate or needy

niceupthedance Fri 08-Apr-16 08:07:45

What feels different about him?

The self-professed 'nice guy' I dated who I thought was different turned out to be the biggest asshole of them all.

VinceNoirLovesHowardMoon Fri 08-Apr-16 08:22:16

Yes you're being naive. A week of texting isn't getting to know someone. It's lovely to have that 'this might be something' feeling but keep it in perspective.

marylinmonroeroe Fri 08-Apr-16 09:59:05

Well he originally asked me out this weekend but I was busy and then my plans fell through.

I'm 100% not desperate to be in a relationship. I've been happily single for a long time.

Snoopydo Fri 08-Apr-16 10:05:05

I would meet up sooner rather than later. Just say you are free after all. Then if he turns out to be a knob you won't have wasted more time texting and daydreaming.

Tiggeryoubastard Fri 08-Apr-16 10:09:13

Don't get too involved too soon. You've not even met. I agree that rearranging wouldn't be a good idea. And bear in mind that (despite what some people say) Tinder is predominantly a hook up site.

honeyroar Fri 08-Apr-16 10:29:43

Slow down! I felt like that a few times when I was on line dating, it wasn't real when I met them. One guy I could talk to for hours via text or email, but when we met I couldn't wait to get home. With a bit of luck it will work out, but I'd try and meet sooner if possible, stop the imagination and start reality..

Toomuchinfo1 Fri 08-Apr-16 14:34:19

I think you should tell him your plans have fallen through and see if he is still available. I don't think that looks desperate, as he has already asked you out this weekend.

I echo what the other have said too . . .stay safe, and have fun xxxx

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now