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'friendship' and my worrying constantly, any advice?

(4 Posts)
getagr1p Wed 03-Feb-16 14:16:33

this will sound so pathetic, but I need some advice and to get this out of my head. I upset someone last week at work, I was really upset about something and got myself very upset and really wasn't thinking straight, that's when I said something I shouldn't have and upset this person. The following day I apologised for what I said, I meant it and thought we had moved on, have spoken since but I do feel like she is just tolerating me and yesterday she was rather off with me, so today I decided to leave her be and didn't speak, thinking that's the best thing to do give her space and not feel like she has to speak to me. Now I am feeling really bad and think it was wrong to leave her and not speak. I get myself so upset and worked up about what I should and shouldn't do, I felt it was best to just leave it today, but now I think different, I am worrying I have upset her even more - it's ridiculous and childish I knowsad other than to grow up, any advice?

goodnightdarthvader1 Wed 03-Feb-16 14:20:12

You've apologised. Act normal when you see her and try to let it go. If she doesn't get over it, you can't change that, so let her get on with it.

goddessofsmallthings Wed 03-Feb-16 15:52:28

If you put yourself in the other person's situation I suspect that you'd be wary of a colleague who upset you.

Let it lie and allow your colleague to come round to your former relationship again. In the meantime smile (no bared teeth!) ruefully when you see her and indicate by your body language that you're not about to go into one again a threat to her.

It occurs to me that if what you said was overheard by others, you should make it clear to them that you don't know what came over you and you didin't mean a word of what you said.

getagr1p Wed 03-Feb-16 16:13:29

thank you for replies, I have made it clear I didn't know what came over me and didn't mean what I said - although no one heard, I think it's got around to a few people. I accept she may be wary of me, that's why I don't want her to feel like I am 'forcing' myself on her so she feels she has to speak to me, so left it be completely today. Thank you smile

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