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incredible that so many people are feeling this way

(3 Posts)
munkynutts Wed 27-Jan-16 09:25:19

I've found myself in the position of being asked for advice from two different mates on two totally opposite ends of the spectrum of a same issue!

One mate is female, and she just can't seem to want to have sex with her DH despite loving him.

The other mate is male, and although he knows his wife loves him, she hasn't wanted sex with him in a long time now.

I realise from reading these threads that this is a pretty common issue (I'm younger and not married so I don't really have any practical experience to draw on).

I want to be able to support my mates because it seems that on both sides this causes them quite a lot of suffering. I'm just wondering if you could share your experiences - why does this happen and what have you done to resolve it?

I thought women's sex drives increased as they got older? Or is that a myth?

Spam2016 Wed 27-Jan-16 09:42:35

I am a female in this situation with two DC s - it's a horrible place to be and just doesn't make sense my dH is wonderful and amazing dad . We have gone through a lot but my feelings towards him just don't include "fancy or perhaps the right attraction.this is leading to problems he fancies loves me etc but I love him but maybe just not enough or in the right way. Started couple counselling - she said women who meet their husbands and are attracted because of kindness , caring person etc tend to struggle later with feeling s and perhaps sexual attraction . It's an awful place to be in for both parties . How can you split a family because of that ? Am hoping couple counselling will save us confused

LineyReborn Wed 27-Jan-16 11:14:43

Well known passion-killers include tiredness, and underlying resentment. It can take quite a skilled counsellor to unpick the latter.

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