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New relationship?

(6 Posts)
SaraChaud7 Mon 25-Jan-16 20:22:51

Hi
I am 37 and have never had a close relationship. Everytime someone tried to get close to me, i have had to dump them. My cold relationship with one of my parents might have made me this way. All the relationships that i did enter were cold and i guess in the just sexual. Its sad. I have learnt. I like someone but after 3 months of hurting and being distant, do i tell him that i have had such difficulties and that i have never let anyone close to me. Will he run away?

pocketsaviour Mon 25-Jan-16 20:34:07

OP it sounds like you need some extensive therapy before you are ready to be in a relationship with anyone, or you're going to end up hurting this man as you've undoubtedly hurt your previous partners.

Try to find a therapist who is experienced in working with survivors of emotionally abusive and neglectful parents.

You can get to a place where you can enjoy rewarding relationships with others but you do have to invest in yourself to get there flowers

SaraChaud7 Mon 25-Jan-16 20:41:59

I really don't think i will hurt this man, as i have dealt my past. I did those things in my early 20s. I just need to start anew but not sure if its right to put it all out there.

pocketsaviour Mon 25-Jan-16 20:54:24

So it has been 15 years or so since you had a relationship at all?

SaraChaud7 Mon 25-Jan-16 21:06:14

err yeah but i have had 'help'. I have not dumped anyone. Busy with career etc. Just running away from things. maybe 10, although dated someone briefly 2 years ago. Really not out to hurt anyone.

SaraChaud7 Mon 25-Jan-16 21:50:41

I think i pretty much know the answers, you need to communicate and tell people you need more time etc. Everyone comes from a different background and you love each other then it will work out. I guess wanted reassurance.

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