So if anyone remembers my previous threads you will know my husband is quite controlling and emotionally vacant. He is emotionally and mentally abusive. He plays games with my mind.
And I had had enough and sought out a lawyer and enquirer about divorce. I was feeling positive.
Husband found out and he basically begged for another chance. Said he would finally go and get help.
I would prefer to keep my family together then destroy it for my kids sake so like a fucking stupid idiot I agreed.
Well that was a week ago and today we were talking. About our relationship and he said something and I reacted in a way he didn't like. I reacted negatively.
He then got angry and started having a go saying 'what have I said to you today that was negative?'
I said something like 'so I can only say something negative if you have then?'
And then it's all a blur.
We were yelling over each other (kids weren't here) and he was saying how unreasonable it was for me to say what I said, and I was saying that I have to be able to say how I feel even if it's not good and then I just lost it.
I punched myself in the head, and on my body and just screamed. I screamed and screamed and screamed. I tried to leave the room and went to he kitchen but I was still screaming. It was like an out of body experience. I couldn't stop myself.
When I did and I calmed down I just got on with getting ready to go get dd from nursery. He then said 'do you see that your crazy and hysterical? Do you see that it's obscene to say I need help when that is how you behave?'
I told him to move out. I told him that I have nothing left for him to take. I left to get dd.
He is still here and he is just sat watching a film.
I don't know what I expect. I've been such an idiot. For fucks sake
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Relationships
I've been stupid and then I completely lost it
BoringlyRestrictive · 19/01/2016 16:52
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