I try not to put my very personal details on Mumsnet. But I desperately need someone to give me a slap on my face.
I have been with DP for just 8 years now. I met him when I was 14, a year later I fell pregnant by 15 and gave birth to DS (6) at 15, two months away from my 16th birthday. I'm 21. DP is 23.
During my relationship with DP, it has been hell. It was a very volatile and controlling relationship. He abused me constantly. I assumed that since we both met when we were really young, I thought he would changed. Sadly, his now 23 and even though the physical abuse has stopped. He still continues to be emotionally abusive/ threatening. The reason why the physical abuse has stopped is because I don't see him often.
For the past months, DSdad, hasn't been there for DS. He'll make promises to see him, but often breaks his promises. DS has SEN. I tell people who I don't know that he has Autism, as it's just "easier". But really he has a social communication disorder, severe speech and language disorder and dyspraxia. He now goes to a specialist speech and language school. But I feel like that I'm doing everything for DS, and his just there in the background. But! he has the time to call me, and always wants me to meet up with him.
I feel like I'm doing everything by myself. It's so hard with DS as it is already. Due to his severe language difficulties, his more prone to tantrums and taking him out is a nightmare. I feel like I'm being constantly judged by the public for being a young mum (and I often get mistaken of being DS older sister), and they see a "badly" behaved child on me who I can't control. I've told DSdad countless of times to take DS out as I need a break, but like again, he makes promises and often breaks them.
It's 2016, I'm in my final year at University, taking care of DS and I often think, do I really want to waste my years on DSdad. I've wasted enough as it is. But the reason why I "stay" is because I often think "who would want me anyway", I have a child with SEN. Would anyone really want to be with us? I'm worried that I won't have more kids in the future etc. I don't know.
I just want to break free of DSdad but I'm finding it hard to.
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Relationships
To tell me that my life isn't over and to break free of DP
17 replies
Notgivingin789 · 01/01/2016 17:41
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